A Date With Faet - Extras #4

“Lady Tegan Brádaigh and associates, Queen Áine will see you now,” the middle-aged seneschal announced.

The three of us followed the overdressed fae out of the waiting room. We were taken down a short but ornately-decorated hall and into a throne room.

It wasn’t the main room, this one was much smaller. And it wasn’t the real throne, this was just a large comfortable padded chair.

This was where the queen held smaller, more private audiences. It was where she would conduct official business that was too delicate or secret to be discussed in the large royal court. There were places for guards to stand but those posts were only filled when the queen met with folks whom she didn’t already trust implicitly.

The seneschal led us in then stepped aside and closed the door. He didn’t leave, he just stood there next to the door.

Before any of us could bow, Queen Áine said with a smile “Lady Tegan, this is an unexpected surprise.”

I stepped closer and bowed as I greeted her, “Your majesty.”

When I straightened up again I asked, “How is this unexpected? You sent for me.”

“It’s unexpected for you to bother with all the formalities of an official audience,” she replied. “Usually you just let yourself into my bedchambers and wait for me there.”

I smirked slightly but before I could protest, her attention shifted to my two companions.

“Hello Elise, it’s good to see you again. And you must be Saoirse, you’ve grown quite a bit since I saw you last.”

Both girls were quiet and perhaps a little anxious. I didn’t think they’d be so awe-struck about meeting royalty. Especially not Elise, she’d already met Áine twice since becoming my daughter some twenty months ago. Although it might have had something to do with the fact that this time the queen was in all her royal finery and had the crown on her head.

The two girls both did their best to curtsey, but neither spoke a word. And their curtseys were a little off since neither of them were dressed up for the occasion.

In fact all three of us stood out in our Earth clothing. I was wearing a pair of tight blue-jeans and a t-shirt. Both the teens were in leggings and loose tunic tops. And we all just had running shoes on our feet.

“I hope you don’t mind that I brought them?” I asked Áine. “Elise wanted to visit again, and Saoirse asked if she could come along too.”

The young queen smiled, “Not at all. How long do you expect to be staying?”

I replied, “I thought maybe we could hang around to celebrate Beltane with you? It’s a bit unusual for us to miss the festival at castle Brádaigh, but I think we’d be excused if we were partying at the royal palace instead. I couldn’t keep Saoirse away from Lady Maeve much longer than that though, we’ll probably be heading back the day after. So, three days I suppose?”

Queen Áine addressed her seneschal, “Laughlin, please show miss Saoirse and miss Elise to the VIP wing and see that their needs are accommodated.”

She turned her attention back to the two girls, “You’ll both dine with myself and Tegan tonight. Until then, do make yourselves comfortable.”

I knew Áine was basically sending them away so she and I could get to the official business she actually summoned me here to discuss. And maybe some unofficial business as well, afterwards.

The girls both bowed and turned to follow the seneschal back out the door.

Before they left I reminded them, “Don’t forget our deal. You bring me Captain Callum’s fancy hat, and I’ll teach you two that spell Maeve doesn’t want you to know.”

Elise and Saoirse both grinned and my daughter suppressed a giggle as they hurried out after Laughlin.

The queen gave me a stern look and demanded “Tegan did you just send two innocent young girls to steal part of my captain’s uniform?”

“Of course not,” I replied with a straight face. “I sent Elise and Saoirse.”

She rolled her eyes then said, “Tell me about Earth, Tegan. How did the hand-over go?”

My biggest complaint about this room was there was nowhere to sit. She got the big comfy chair but her guests were left standing. And as much as I liked to flaunt rules and traditions, even I figured it would be a bit too much to cuddle up against her or even just sit on the arm of her throne while I was delivering an official report.

So I just stood there alone in front of her as I replied, “Like I said in my last letter, construction of the embassy building is nearly complete. Lord Seamus is currently staying in my mansion, but he’ll move into his quarters in the new place as soon as it’s ready. We had a meeting with the human officials two weeks ago and did the introductions, Lord Seamus delivered your letter and I confirmed that he’s replaced me as the ambassador.”

Áine asked, “How did the humans take that?”

I rolled my eyes, “Seamus is an old stodgy boring pompous blowhard. He’s only just barely learned English, and he’s a stickler about protocol and ceremony and all that stuff that bores me to death. The humans diplomats love him. He’s exactly what they want in an ambassador.”

The queen suppressed a smile, “Seriously Tegan, do you think Lord Seamus will do well as my representative on Earth?”

“Yeah,” I nodded. “He’s exactly the sort of person I’d hate to have to deal with, but like I said he’s perfect for the human officials. And I have to give him credit, he’s really done his homework. He’s read all the human history books I recommended, he’s followed all my notes. And honestly he’s been working very hard to learn the language. I don’t particularly like him, and I sure wouldn’t want to hang out with him, but he’s taking the job very seriously.”

“I’m glad to hear that,” Áine responded. She hesitated, “And you’re sure you aren’t upset about your demotion? From ambassador to diplomatic envoy is quite a fall. You’re basically just a courier now.”

I smiled and shook my head, “It’s fine. Believe me. I wasn’t happy about the ambassador job to begin with, and more than once I thought the boring meetings would be the end of me. And honestly? I don’t have the temperament for the job, your majesty. That’s maybe the best thing about Seamus. He’s not likely to start an interplanetary incident. Or a war.”

The queen rolled her eyes again, “I’m sure you wouldn’t have done anything that bad Tegan.”

I grimaced but decided not to go any further down that line of conversation. Instead I moved on to the next bit of business.

“So the humans want to maintain formal diplomatic relations with us, and they’re still interested in having some official trade between us. Seamus has taken over the negotiations, and I’ve briefed him on the list of ‘wants’ the humans have been pushing for from the start. There’s a number of things that they keep asking about, despite being told repeatedly we simply won’t budge on them. There’s a few points that we can negotiate over, and a couple points we may actually be able to work with them on.”

I continued, “On the other hand they’re still completely flummoxed by the fact that we don’t actually have any demands of them. They’re so enamoured with their technology, they literally can’t understand that we don’t want it. The fact that our only real requests have all been conditional based on what they plan on doing, I don’t know, it’s left them very confused.”

Áine smiled, “I suppose it does make negotiations difficult, when the party you’re attempting to bargain with doesn’t actually want anything you have to offer.”

With a more serious expression she asked, “Do you think they’re going to continue their plans to go public? To let the rest of the humans know we exist?”

I sighed, “At this point? I have no idea. I know we came close last autumn, but since then I’ve changed my mind. I think I’d be happier if we just forgot the whole thing now. That’s another reason I’m glad to have given up the job. Conflict of interest.”

She asked, “In a worst-case scenario, what do you think could happen if they do go public?”

I sighed deeply, “Humans have a long history of turning on their own kind for being ‘different’. Whether it’s skin colour, sexual orientation, gender, religion, ethnicity… If they expose us there’s a good chance half the population will immediately hate us and vilify us. Some of them will cash in on that distrust and incite more hatred and violence, and a few will actually try and attack us.”

I continued, “And I’ve warned the humans. I told them, if fae become the target of a witch-hunt, the witches will win. We have magic and some fae over there are very powerful. And we know their weaknesses.”

The queen considered that, then asked “What would you suggest we do, if fae over there became the targets of hate and violence?”

I didn’t even need to think about it, I stated “If the humans go public about us, I strongly suggest you offer an amnesty for every fae currently living on Earth. Don’t wait for things to turn bad, offer it immediately. Fae living over there in exile should be given the option to return to Otherworld without fear. And extend that to their families too, because if they’ve been over there long enough they could have children. Half fae, quarter fae, whatever. If the humans insist on going public then we shouldn’t expect fae to have to choose between persecution on Earth and persecution here, and they shouldn’t be asked to leave their loved-ones behind.”

“Ok Tegan,” Áine responded after a few moments’ thought. “I’ll consider that, and discuss it with some of my advisors. Blanket amnesty could be a problem, but I understand your concerns.”

After a few moments she changed the subject, “Back to the topic of diplomacy, what sorts of demands are the humans making? Anything new?”

“More or less the same as before,” I replied. “They want us to help them hunt down and capture or otherwise stop any dangerous fae criminals preying on humans. Which is something I think we should probably work with them on? Fae like that give all of us a bad name, and will potentially make it harder on any other fae who’re just trying to live peacefully over there. They also want us to expose all the shadow-economy contacts we know of, but I think we should probably just ignore that request. The shadow-economy is too important a resource, and anyways most of the participants are human. And Earth civilizations have had black markets and grey markets forever, without any fae involvement or input.”

I continued, “Then there’s the whole identification thing? They want us to teach them how to spot and identify fae. That’s never going to happen. They mentioned issuing special ID for fae, but we’re not going to help them with that either. All it would accomplish is making things easier for humans to discriminate against us. The way they talked about it was creepy as hell too. ‘Voluntary self-identification’ and ‘law-abiding fae should step forward’. Then the very next thing they mentioned was blood tests and spot-checks.”

I was scowling by that point. “It’s like they have no self-awareness at all. I used to think we were blind to our own history, but humans are willfully so.”

Áine considered that for a few moments, then moved on to her next question, “Are they still asking us to teach them about magic?”

That got an eye-roll out of me, “Yes. And we’ve told them over and over, not only will we not teach them, but they couldn’t do it anyways. And the stuff they’re asking for? They literally asked if we’d teach them military spells and mind-magic. I mean, they’re not even trying to be subtle. Then they had the gall to complain that we were withholding healing magic from them. They went on about curing cancer and healing otherwise permanent injuries.”

My tone was hard again as I stated, “I told them if they want access to fae healing magic they should cut the red tape and let the fae healers already on Earth get to work. I reminded them that Kaitlyn’s been trying to operate her clinic and provide free life-saving magic for trans humans for almost two full years now, but they keep throwing roadblocks and bureaucratic nonsense in her way. At least she’s still able to help people in secret. Honestly sometimes I think that girl has the patience of a saint, the way she puts up with them moving the goal-posts every other month.”

“All right Tegan,” the queen said with a sigh. “I’m sure there’s more but I can see you’re getting uptight. Let’s call an end to the official business for today, and move on to something more relaxing.”

• • • • •

Dinner was a quiet, friendly affair. Before the meal Áine got out of her fancy royal gown and removed her crown. Instead she wore a simple casual dress. Elise and Saoirse were led to the queen’s private dining room by one of the staff, and the four of us sat down to eat together.

As the servants brought out the food, my daughter reached up under her tunic then produced a soft velvet hat. It was richly made and dyed a sort of an orangey yellow that was probably meant to represent gold. There was a white patch on the front with a red dragon embroidered in it, and a couple short bright red feathers tucked into the side.

Elise tossed it to me across the table and stated with a smirk, “That’s one hat as requested. You owe me and Saoirse a spell.”

I caught the hat and grinned, “Good job you two! I’ll pay up before we return home.”

Áine just stared in shock and wonder.

The servants departed after the food was served, and I tossed the hat back to my girl. “You and Saoirse can keep it, I just wanted to see that you’d done it. You’ll still get your spell, don’t worry.”

Both teens giggled, and Elise tossed it to my little sister and said “Here Saoirse, it doesn’t go with purple but I bet it’ll look good on you.”

My little sister grinned, “Thanks Elise!”

She didn’t put it on though, she just tucked it away under the table as we all finally started eating.

“I simply cannot believe the audacity of you lot,” the queen commented over her meal. “Tegan you are a terrible influence on these girls. You convinced them to commit a crime in my palace, then brazenly parade the evidence before me at my own dinner table.”

I just grinned as I enjoyed a sip of mead.

Apart from our hat-stealing criminal enterprise, the rest of the dinner conversation was fairly benign. Saoirse was enjoying her visit to the royal palace, she and Elise were sharing a huge room with two big poster beds and windows overlooking the courtyard so they could watch all the comings and goings.

Áine asked the girls about life back at home, Saoirse told her things were quiet at the castle and Elise told her things were boring on Earth.

My girl still travelled back and forth with me, but she already spent more than half her time over here. Otherworld was more fun for her. It was home to her grandparents and her best friend, plus she actually had more freedom and things to do here. On Earth she was mostly limited to my estate, and the occasional supervised trip into the city.

After dinner there was some decadent dessert and more idle conversation, then the two girls finally departed to return to their VIP room. I stayed with Áine as the girls left, I hadn’t been assigned a room of my own. The queen would be keeping me with her for the next few nights.

Áine and I bid Elise and Saoirse good night, and Elise giggled and whispered something in English about a ‘royal booty call’ then quickly hurried off with Saoirse.

I bit my lip and tried not to smile, while Áine gave me a bit of a look.

She raised an eyebrow and commented, “I assume Elise is unaware that I’ve started learning the human language? While I may not recognize that particular idiom, I think I can guess what it means.”

“Sorry,” I blushed slightly.

She shook her head slowly, “You know Tegan it really is remarkable how she takes after you. In looks, in temperament, and in mischief. Yet I know she must be adopted. You told me about the curse, after all.”

I grimaced slightly, “Yeah… I’m sorry Áine. I couldn’t say anything before, because I didn’t know for sure. But now I know. That curse has been lifted.”

I didn’t say anything about Elise’s origins, I wouldn’t tell Áine the truth about my daughter unless it became absolutely necessary. On the other hand I hadn’t lied, and the way I’d phrased things left it open to interpretation whether Elise was adopted or not.

The queen stared at me a moment then smiled, “Tegan that’s wonderful news! I’m sure you and your whole family must be greatly relieved!”

“Yes, my mother and wives are all very happy,” I agreed. “And myself as well of course. Neither Saoirse or Elise know about the curse yet. They’ll find out when they come of age, along with all the other terrible Brádaigh family secrets.”

My grin told the queen I was teasing again.

She drank the last of her wine then got to her feet, “That’s enough of your misbehaviour for this evening. Any further naughtiness shall be confined to my private bedchambers.”

“Yes your majesty,” I replied with a smirk.

I got up as well, and as I followed her out of the dining room and in the direction of her bedchambers I asked “I take it you’ve had enough of your diplomatic envoy, now it’s time for your consort?”

She closed the door behind us once we were in her bedroom, then turned to face me. “Correct. And as my consort, you are overdressed.”

“Yes your majesty,” I repeated, as I reached for the hem of my t-shirt.

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