A Serenade for the Innocent - 92

I don’t know if this is a good idea, but I’m already here, plus I’m too lazy to go back home now, so I might as well see what this place has to offer. The brochure said that the session would begin at 9 am, but I’m already thirty minutes late, making me feel a bit embarrassed to come since I know that a late man would probably not be welcomed there anymore.

I sighed as I took a few steps away from the Grief Feeling Forum’s doorway when a car parked a few feet away from me. I halted my actions when I realized that the car that had just stopped in the parking lot of the forum was a black Mercedes Benz AG, but what surprised me more was the driver of the car who got off the vehicle swiftly.

The man was sweating along with his black suit and pants and red tie and was about to enter the forum when our eyes locked hurriedly.

“You came!” The sweaty man uttered with that gentle smile that I was already used to see.

“Yeah, Jimmy,” I said with a chuckle, trying to downplay my nervousness with a lukewarm response.

“Well? What are you waiting for?” He then approached me and wrapped his arms around my shoulder. I could feel the heat coming out of his body, making me think that maybe he didn’t open the air conditioning of his car. “Let’s go in, yeah?” He said as he pulled me towards him, dragging me towards the door that I was reluctant to enter.

I gulped the spit in lingering in my mouth as Jimmy swept all of my reluctance away by pretty much forcing me to go through this forum thing. I really am still nervous, though, because I’m not sure what they would think of me being late when I haven’t even told them that I would be coming.

What welcomed me inside was a vast hall, almost looking like a basketball court if it weren’t for the few people sitting on at the very center with two spotlights pointed at them as the only light source around. The rest of the hall was pitch dark other than the area where the spotlight touches.

“I am the one responsible for this forum, so I always come to visit every week. This place wouldn’t be here if I didn’t beg Mother to do it for me as a favor for, like, two years. Now it’s sitting here, helping grieving people like you every week. I’m very proud of it, so you have no idea how happy I am that you came!” Jimmy then turned around to close the door as he looked around with a proud nod. “There are only five other members right now, but we usually have people like you who come unannounced just to try it out. Most of them never return, which is, well, a bummer, but I don’t mind. As long as I know that I helped them somehow, I can rest easy at night even if…” Jimmy then chuckled as he shook his head.

I was so dumbfounded at this new side of Jimmy that I am only now seeing for the first time as I took my first step towards the hall. Jimmy then gestured me to join the others at the center of the building.

I was about to do so when I suddenly whiffed a familiar scent in the air, making me stop my tracks with widened eyes. Jimmy must have noticed this as he suddenly started frowning. The other five people sitting at the center also looked towards us with curious gazes, forcing them to stop the conversation that they were having.

My eyes watered as I blinked nonstop while that putrid smell pierced through my nostrils. It was the familiar damp scent of an old air-conditioner, sending out a chill breeze throughout the room. Still, the only thing my brain could decipher after sensing that damp smell is the familiar stench I had encountered when I first saw Mike’s dead, hanging body. As the scent of the air-conditioner intensifies, my feet finally gave in, making me kneel on the wooden floor as the surrounding was gradually enveloped with a maddening miasma of a decaying corpse.Find authorized novels in Webnovel，faster updates, better experience，Please click www.webnovel.com for visiting.

Jimmy then approached me as he gently tapped on my back. He was trying to say something, but none of his words were entering my ears. A blonde and fair-skinned lady then approached me along with a white face mask while her voice slowly echoed throughout my brain.

“It’s gonna be okay…” She repeatedly whispered. “You’re gonna be fine.” She repeated while placing the face mask on my face, hooking both of it around my earlobes.

I instinctively grabbed both of her hands while my entire body shakes as the putrid stench of Mike’s corpse slowly disappears, and the only thing I could smell is nothing else but the old air-conditioner. I then started to breathe through my nose again, but I could still slightly distinguish that decaying smell very subtly throughout the atmosphere.

“How did you know?” I whispered underneath my breath.

The lady then looked at me with a raised eyebrow, clearly confused. “Hm?”

“The mask…” I said with a hoarse voice while I looked at Jimmy as he tried to reassure the rest of the forum members. “How did you know that I need the mask?”

Jimmy then looked at me after hearing me say that, but the only thing I could see at that moment was the angelic face of the blonde lady who’s still gently rubbing my back.

“You were covering your nose.” She then shook her head with her eyes closed as a gentle smile crept upon her face. “No, you’re pretty much pinching your nose so tightly earlier. All of us thought you wanted to tear it off your face.” She then gently held my left hand with a tap. “I didn’t know if it would work, but I guess you really do just need a mask.” She said with a chuckle.

I then saw Jimmy sigh with a relieved look on his face as he whispered a few more words to the rest of the forum members. They all smiled at him with an understanding look on their faces, and, one by one, they all gathered around me, trying to help me stand up and leading me towards one available chair at the center of the hall.

The other members also sat on the empty chairs in the area where the spotlight touches. We were all sitting on a circle like children playing Trip to Jerusalem. The blonde woman sat beside me with the same alluring smile that she always had by the time she had met me, and I also noticed that the rest of the people around me had the same welcoming vibe around them. Meanwhile, Jimmy sat away from the spotlights, observing us underneath the guise of the shadows.

For a few moments, they all just stared at me motionlessly, and I mean that literally. They were not moving at all aside from the blonde lady who kept rubbing my back with her right hand continuously without stopping at the same motion while her other hand was on my wrist, the same speed, and with the same gentle smile on her face. It isn’t odd for me to say that they look like lifelike mannequins who were given life momentarily because of what had just happened to me earlier.

“You can stop now,” I said with a muffled whisper while touching the face mask wrapped around my lips and nose.

“Oh, I’m sorry!” The blonde said, pulling her hands away from my body. “I guess I’m being too nosy again!”

“Classic, Nicole!” Jimmy subtly said, removing his invisible status away from us once and for all.

However, none of the other members seemed to have cared much about what he has just said, albeit they all laughed in unison. Again, I meant that literally. By the time Jimmy stopped speaking, all five forum members had laughed at the same time like they were scripted to do so and stopped doing so after five seconds just as suddenly as when they started–their laughter ceased just at the same time again like a choreographed ensemble. They were all still looking at me with the same gentleness plastered all over their faces, smiling at me as if they were just only here to direct their eyes at me.

“I’m sorry for spoiling the mood for everyone.” I had thought that maybe my behavior earlier sparked their curiosity towards me since they just kept staring at me nonstop by the time I had sat on the chair as if their eyes were glued on me.

“It’s okay.” The blonde lady said with his smile spreading across her face while her eyes were open just as widely as her mouth.

“Uh… Okay.” I said with a sarcastic chuckle.

The five people who were sitting with me on the circle laughed at the same time once again when they saw me chuckling.

“Why don’t you tell us what happened to you, man?” Jimmy said as he slowly stood up from his seat on the shadows. “I’m sure we’re all curious about your story.”

I looked on the ground momentarily, thinking if it was really fine for me to make them carry the same weight I have on my shoulders.

The blonde lady named Nicole then gently touched my shoulder while looking around her fellow members. “If you’re not ready, we’re not going to force you. Earlier, we were talking about our lives and how happy we feel now that we have this group who willingly listens to our problems even if it was just twice a week.” She then looked at me with an understanding gaze, filled with tenderness and a pinch of love. “But none of us forces our friends to speak up their mind. You’re our friend now, too, so we will understand if you’re still not ready to share your story with us.”

The rest of the forum members replied a few words of agreement to what she had just said, along with some reassurance that my feelings are valid and something else like that.

I smiled with a sigh as my gaze slowly lifted away from the wooden floor. Earlier, I thought that the member’s eager gazes and warm smiles looked somewhat weird, but I’m kinda seeing it in a different light now.

I then loosened my shoulders a bit, and Nicole must have noticed that since her beautiful smile broadened in an instant. “It’s okay… You see…”

And then I told them everything that had happened recently. As I went on with my story about how I lost my career, my only living parent, and my last remaining friend, I saw that their faces turned into a saddened state, some were even tearing up a bit when I explained what had just happened to me earlier. I reiterated that the smell of the air-conditioner made me remember what it felt like when I first saw Mike’s corpse. I didn’t really cry because I feel like, at this point, I have already shed the rest of the tears in my body. Still, the absolute agony that this immediate domino effect of pure sadness had given me was transparently conveyed through my shaking voice.

“Sometimes, I feel that maybe I should go and approach a therapist…” As I said that, all of the members of the forum suddenly looked at me with a distorted look of shock as if they had just heard the most absurd thing a human being could ever utter in their waking moments.

“No!” Jimmy shouted as loud as he could as he slowly approached me. He then stood behind me and held both my shoulders gently, making me feel his hot and sweaty palms around the fabric that he had just touched. “Therapy is bad for you, bad, I say! Terrible! They will give you so much poison like religion and medicine and stupid other literature that you would never need ever, ever, ever in your life, ever!”

Nicole then grabbed my arms tightly after hearing Jimmy’s breakdown. “That’s right! Haven’t you watched Requiem for a Dream? Mother would make us watch that movie every month, and I know that she spoke the truth when she says that the drugs those quacks who call themselves psychologists are nothing but toxins that will kill you more than any weapon in the US Military!”

The rest of the forum members also agreed to what both of them said with varying degrees of emotions from anger to sadness, but none of their statements are positive. They all pretty much begged me never to step foot in any psychologist’s office, for it would ruin my mind!

“Look, man,” Jimmy said with a sigh as he knelt on my side while subtly patting my head. “We are not your family, and no matter what we do, your ties with your blood will never be erased from you. It’s a part of you forever! But we can try to mend that hole this tragedy had given you; believe me, we will try! If we fail no matter what we do, you are free to leave, I promise! But… This therapy thing you speak of… It will not help you, but we will… Everything that we will do in this hall from now on will be all for you.”

Jimmy then stood up and ordered one of the taller men in the forum members to open the light while he instructed a middle-aged woman to close the air-conditioner.

“I’m sure we wouldn’t mind a bit of light in here; besides, today is a windy day! I’m sure we don’t mind if we close the air-conditioner for a bit.” Jimmy said with the same gentle smile that the rest of the forum members has.

“This is not really necessary, Jimmy. I don’t want to be an inconvenience to all of you.” I replied with a panicky voice.

“You’re not an inconvenience. You will never be.” Nicole’s voice rang on my ear as I slowly looked at her with reddened eyes, trying my hardest not to spill any tears. “Your feels are valid, just like what we had felt when we first came here. You know, when I first came here, I was so scared that I wouldn’t even want to enter because I feel like the hall would burn down just like how my house did and kill everyone inside… just like what happened to my family. And you know what? Mr. James here told everyone that we would be having our sessions outdoors until I am ready to do it again inside. And look at me now! I feel like I’m living the best moments of my life!”

“That’s right, that’s right. Listen to Nicole.” Jimmy said, making me look at him again as he knelt on my left side. “You have nothing to worry about; you don’t need therapy too. Here… Here in this forum, we will be your family. We will be your friends! None of us may ever be just like those people you have lost, but we are willing to give you the same feeling of happiness that they have given you. Here in Plural Heights, we are all your family; we are all your friends. Plural Heights will give you all that you need. Plural Heights will give you all that you deserve.”

I thought I was over with the sadness, but tears suddenly flowed out of my eyes uncontrollably like a hole on the walls of a dam before I knew it. It went on for quite some time as I heard everyone around me whispering words of encouragement and reassurance towards me. They were telling me that they will accompany me to go to where my mother and my best friend was buried, so I can properly introduce my new friends and family to them.

I nodded my head in a chuckle, thinking of how much of a great idea that would be. We all then stood up, and they all slowly walked out of the hall, ready to meet my fallen loved ones. Jimmy walked in my left side with his hands around my shoulders while Nicole stood on my right side with her hands wrapping my arm.

I then looked behind me to see the empty chairs in the spotlight. It all felt empty and lifeless, although the cheerful voices of my new friends and family rang all around me. I almost took my eyes out of that lighted area when a spectral image of my mother suddenly appeared at the center of the empty chairs. Once again, she was lying on the same metal bed with the same white blanket hiding her body. The white sheet was covering her face, and only her upper body was raised as she slowly shook her head while her covered eyes were directed at me. Somehow, I knew that the image was looking at me.

As the spotlights slowly dimmed out, my mother’s upper body also fell onto the metal bed until there’s nothing left there but the lonely embrace of darkness.

“What’s up?” Nicole said with a worried whisper.

I then smiled at her while shaking my head. “Nothing, let’s go.”