Arrival - 23 Chapter 24
Chapter 24: Kysael- New Memories
June, 1103 A.D.
tI shot up in bed, out of breath and shaking. I had been gifted with a vision, one of Kelose and I. I felt his presence in my spirit, I felt the pull. I knew he was nearby, and the pull on my soul was getting very hard to bear. He didn’t want to meet me at this time, I could hear it in his thoughts. But he wanted me to know that he was nearby, that he could be there for me in an instant if I needed him. We would only see one another if the pain in our souls was completely unbearable anymore. I had to admit though, that I was thankful that he was nearby. It gave me a sense of peace and comfort, to know that he was so close by in case I needed him. I couldn’t just read his thoughts, now, but I could get feelings and quick bits of thought here and there. Dragon had told me that this connection would grow stronger with time.
I thought about the vision that I’d had, and my face heated.
tIn the vision, I had found him in the night, cloaked and waiting outside of Lykra, and I had went to him and cradled him, loved him for the night, before the sun had risen and I had went to Dragon’s medical building to find him working, and laughing with a beautiful brunette that looked at him with admiration.
tAnd I sensed something strange, as if they were tied to one another somehow. As if…as if she were trying to steal him from me. And I was angry, but for him… perhaps, that would be better. Perhaps it would be better for him if he had someone else in his life. I couldn’t give him what he deserved.
tDragon sat up in bed with me, rubbing my arms. “What is it?”
tI smiled. “I sense that you will find someone who can give you much more than I can…. someone who can give you what you deserve, and not just what I have to offer you.” I smiled at him brightly. But then, my heart broke at the thought and I sighed, looking away, my eyes welling up with tears. “I sense that you have already met her. Have you already started to feel love for her…?”
tHe startled. “Your senses are jumbled, Kysael,” he tried to reassure me.
t”I don’t think that they are. You came home one day, smelling like a woman. It was the day that you said that you’d had such a pleasant conversation with one of your patients at work,” I pouted.
tHe sighed. “Well, yes, the conversation was with a woman-”
t”You will love her more than me,” I said, tears spilling over.
tHe took my shoulders into his large hands. “I will not ever love a woman more than I love you, Kysael. Yes, I may have pleasantly enjoyed the attention she offered me, but I would never betray you or your heart. You have to know that. I would never be unfaithful to you.”
tI nodded. “Yes. But I…” I sighed. “I sense that you will replace my love with hers in the future. Perhaps our relationship will come to an end, or perhaps your will power isn’t as strong as you think that it is. But I do know, that you deserve normal love.” I took his face in my hands, and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. “And I cannot give that to you.”
tHe sat there in silence, his eyes drifting away from mine, staring into space. He had nothing else to respond with. How could he, when he knew that I spoke the truth?
tHe sighed, leaning forward and resting his forehead against my own. His eyes met mine. “I will always love you. Truly, unconditionally. You know that… don’t you?”
tI smiled softly at him, and nodded. He gave me a passionate kiss, and he pulled me into his chest and flipped us over so that he was above me, and his face was on me even as his hands worked between us, and soon, he was inside of me. I gasped, enjoying the feeling of being filled. I could feel an extra heat, and I could feel something… something I didn’t expect. I could feel fast stroking, up and down. I closed my eyes, and I was startled to see Kelose in my mind. I saw his reflection as he watched himself, pumping his own sexual organ beside of a pond out in the wilds. He threw his head back, gasping. I was startled, and opened my eyes again to see Dragon watching me.
“What is it?” He asked.
“Its… its nothing.”
“Don’t you lie to me, Kysael,” he grunted, thrusting hard into me.
“Kelose… its Kelose. He can sense me, sense us…. he can feel our mating. He’s–AH!” I shouted at a particularly deep thrust. “He’s pleasuring himself even as you mate with me,” I gasped.
“He is sharing your pleasure,” he said, his tone dark. “Make sure that you let him know,” he paused for a moment, giving me a heated look, his lavender eyes closer to a deep, rich purple. “Make sure you let him know who it was that gave you this pleasure!” He grunted as he speared into me, our bodies slapping together as I struggled to catch my breath, gasping out his name against him into his chest as he increased his pace.
I could see Kelose in my mind, gasping my name. He looked at his reflection again, and I could see his body shaking, his hand increasing speed. He let out a guttural shout as he found his release, and even in that moment I threw my head back and called out for them both as I reached my peak.
I quickly fell asleep in Dragon’s arm as he kissed my head, stroking my hair, catching his breath. His heartbeat was fast under my ear.
*
tDragon and I continued working on training my body. I had been healed almost completely, but I stilll required help. It was a great thing, to have so much support.
tI began feeling something coming even faster than before. I could feel Kelose’s energy. He was training out in the forests. I could feel him nearby, training his body, pushing his muscles. Even as I felt himself spilling his seed onto the ground in the night, pleasuring himself even as Dragon pleased me.
He seemed to have a lot of extra energy, and for now, it was enough to feel him nearby.
tMafrien continuously popped in and out of my mind at random moments, and I had a feeling that whatever was coming, strongly involved him in some way….though….I couldn’t sense how, yet.
tMafrien’s future was important, just as mine was.
tAnd I hoped that his future was important in a good way.
tI began making more time for Dragon, other than just working on my training. I wanted to give him happiness, while I still could.
tNew memories for a new future.
tWe went to places, had fun.
tWe hunted together, fished together.
tWe danced, even sang together.t
tWe did everything together after that, and taught one another many things.
tIt was growing into something that it had never been in the past, and I tried to open my heart to him fully. I knew that he was giving it his all, and I needed to do the same.
tPerhaps our future could be brighter.
tI smiled silently to myself. I felt sorry for Dragon, in all honesty. I knew that he deserved better than this misery. Better than me.
tThe misery of being with someone who couldn’t love him with her whole self.
tAnd I knew that she would come back along soon enough.
tAfter all, Dragon was a very attractive, very noble, very honorable gentleman.
tI could only hope that our futures would be bright, despite all of the warnings clashing in my mind.
*
tI awoke one night, after a dream of Kelose, to sit up in bed. I could feel him nearby, still. He was closer this time, and I could feel the pain radiating throughout his body as I felt it in my own. He didn’t want to just sit out there alone, this time. He had used our bond to call to me, and I felt the pull. I could hear the song, the draw. I fought, tears running down my face as I fought the sobs. It was gut wrenching, painful. I thought that I would die if I didn’t answer. I looked over my shoulder, back to my husband. I hated myself for what I was about to do.
tDragon lay next to me, still sound asleep. I gently got out of bed, and pulled on a light coat as I made my way out of the room, and through the maze of tunnels.
t”Where are you going at such an hour? You are normally asleep with Dragon at this time,” Moserre said as he approached me.
tI startled, and looked back at him, guilt clouding my emotions.
tHe simply studied me for a moment before nodding slowly.
t”It is the Rogue assassin, isn’t it? He’s been hiding here and there on our borders, as if he thinks he can hide from our powerful Wraith eyes. The one that you completed the Soul Bond with.”
tI nodded. “I-”
tHe held up a hand to stop me. “You don’t need to explain yourself to me, daughter. I know more about the Soul Bond than you might think. It pulls you to him. Calls to you in your sleep, interrupts your dreams. That’s why I have allowed him to stay in the forest nearby. I know that your Soul Bond requires his presence nearby, that he has to be close in case you need him.” He rested his right index and middle fingers over my forehead. “Yes, I feel the turmoil there. You love them both, don’t you?”
tTears filled my eyes. “Yes…but I’ve loved Dragon longer, and I love him more. And I have more cause to love hime. But Kelose…I don’t want to love him this way, not in a romantic, but I do.”
t”Go on and be with him for a while. I will tell Dragon that I asked you to run an errand for me should he awake before you return.”
t”Thank you, Mos-father,” I corrected myself. I tried to remember what little Wraith speech he had taught me. “Tahn kohh, faahnehn.”
tHe simply gave me a knowing smile and made his way back through the tunnels. I ascended the stairway, and I felt the rush of fresh air as I stepped into the forest.
tI used the bond to feel my way to him, hiding in the forest by the river.
tI sat down on a tree root, and after a few minutes, I felt him descend beside of me, pulling me into his lap as he sat beside of my spot. His energy was all the darker than usual, and it made me feel cold but hot all the same because of his immensely warm body temperature.
tI felt my skin prickle, but I felt hot. This unwanted feeling, but it felt so good…
t”Kysael,” he whispered, his voice dark and thick with restrained passion as he brought my mouth around to his. “Kysael… my Soul Bonded…”
tMy body tensed and tingled as he wasted no time and undressed me, no words spoken as he touched me and mated with me. It felt so wrong to have his mouth and his hands on me, and it made me wrong to feel him inside of me. I felt so wrong. And I felt even more distraught with myself at the fact that my body craved this, that I burned with every trace of his hands and his mouth on me even as he moved inside of me.
tTears ran down my face as I reached my peak, and he cried right along with me. Neither of us could stop it.
tAnd neither of us could fight against each other.
tIt wasn’t until dawn that anything else had been said.
t”I am sorry that I pulled you away like that. I couldn’t resist the feelings or the pull anymore. I have been trying… I have been really fighting it, trying to let you be with him and him only. I have been taking part of your pleasure, hoping that it would sate my cravings for you. But I couldn’t take the tugging anymore. I couldn’t fight the dreams.”
tI shook my head. “I’ve…I’ve been dreaming of you a lot, lately,” I said softly. “I have never felt such a drawing sensation on my spirit. Your singing doesn’t help, you know.”
tHe nodded. “That is why I had to come. I felt my energy draining all the time. I felt tired and ragged out. I felt myself being pulled here. The song….it just comes out naturally.”
tI smiled sadly, and cupped his cheek in my hand. “I need to get back inside, now.”
t”Back to your husband,” he said with a tired tone. There was no malice in his voice.
t”Yes,” I told him softly.
t”I’ve been building a cabin not far west of here. Close to the mountains,” he told me. “It’s slow going, but it is coming along. I’m working on the construction. Neither of us may want this, but I am close by if you ever need me.”
t”That is good, then.”
t”I will let you go on, then.”
tI kissed his cheek, and his golden eyes closed. “I will see you again, Kelose. Wanted or not wanted, we will meet again soon.”
t”I’ll see you then, mate.” And he disappeared into the forest, vanishing almost as if he had never been there in the first place.
tI stood on shaky legs, and went to wash off in the river before I went back home to Lykra, going to the bathing room for women, and I took a long, hot soak and bathed before going back to my room.
tDragon was just waking up, getting dressed. I gazed unabashedly at his bare chest, his muscles moving under his flesh as he moved, and I could see the veins in his body, flowing with that sweet blood of his.
tHe looked to me, a cautiously blank look on his face. My heart sank in my chest. He couldn’t know…could he? “Where have you been?”
tFear and utter shame speared into the deepest recesses of my soul. Tears filled my eyes, and I looked away quickly. Something, anything to spare his feelings. “I couldn’t sleep so I got up early and went to take a bath.”
tHis eyes softened a bit, and he smiled. “Ah,” he said. “Good. Do you feel better?”
t”Yes,” I said. If by better, he meant guilty and conflicted, anyway. I stood on my tip toes to give him a kiss. “I hope that you have a good day, my love.” I said softly. He hesitated, before looking over his shoulder at me, a sad smile on his handsome face.
t”I love you,” he said as he went to leave.
t”I love you more.”
tHe gave me a meaningful look. “I doubt that,” he laughed. And then he was gone.
tAll seemed to be well.
tHe didn’t seem to suspect.
tAlthough, I couldn’t know for sure.
tDragon had always had a way of knowing me better than I knew myself. I had never been good at hiding things from him.
tHe may have known.
tWhy else would he have had such a cautious look on his face?
tHe may have been aware.
tI had been out.
tWhy would I have been out so early? Surely not just to bathe.
tI had been out mating with Kelose.
tI sighed, trying to push past the thought. If he knew…
t”‘I doubt that,’” I recalled him saying. “Do you know, Dragon? Is that why you said you doubted that I loved you more than you loved me?” But Dragon had always loved me. He had always been there for me, protecting me and taking care of me. Maybe that is what he had meant?
tI continued to torture myself.
tBut my renewed energy brought into light that without Kelose’s touch and presence in my life, then I would slowly waste away and be torn down from my lack of energy and I would die. Kelose had said that he had felt that same strain, too. That meant that it was the bond, and not just me.
tThat frightened me.
tAnd while I was trying to make new memories with my husband, I was slowly being tortured by my bond with my mate.
tI knew that it wouldn’t be long before I would break.
tAnd I simply couldn’t predict what would happen when I did. Would Dragon leave me? Would we divorce?
tWould he send me off to be with Kelose?
tWould Kelose even accept me?
tI hated the way that I overthought everything, the way that I absolutely tortured myself with thoughts and guilt.
tI shouldn’t feel guilty, should I?
tDragon had pushed me to complete the Soul Bond with Kelose. He had known what it meant, what it would mean for our future. He surely knew that I would have to meet Kelose sometime or other to mate, to keep our Bond strong…
tRight?
tI groaned. I was trying so desperately to alleviate my guilt, but nothing I told myself could possibly make me feel better for being unfaithful to Dragon…
tEven if I didn’t actually have a choice.
But I could choose one thing; I could choose to erase Kelose’s latest touches away from me. I rushed out of the room, and through the tunnels. I rushed up the stairs, out the door. I rushed out to Dragon’s medical building.
I knew that it wouldn’t be opening for about an hour. He always went early, getting all of his supplies ready. I knew that he would be there alone right now
I rushed through the door, and I shut it, locking it behind me.
“Kysael…? Kysael, what are you–?” Dragon began, but I rushed over to him, reaching up for his face, taking his face in my hands and pulling him down for his lips to meet my own. He pulled away. “Kysael–”
“Mate with me,” I said, breathless. “Please,” I whimpered. I pulled the my skirt up, and my underwear down, and I leaned over one of his working tables. “Give it to me, please. Please!”
He stood there for a moment, eyes wide and a blush on his face. He glanced at the door, before he rushed over to me, stripping himself on the way. He kneeled, and his face was on me in an instant. I cried out, my back bowing so that my chest pushed into the air, as he had his tongue in and out, working on me, working the sensitive bud there.
He stood, leaning over my back and fondling my chest with one hand as he used his other hand to direct himself into me, shoving into me and groaning.
“Dragon,” I whispered. “Dragon,” I said softly. Tears rushed down my face. “Dragon!” I cried.
“Oh, Kysael,” he said softly, pulling out of me and pushing back in with frustrating slowness. “My love. My wife.”
“My life!” I cried.
He stopped for a second, before he stood me up and turned me around, lifting my body up and taking me over to the wall, propping me there and lifting my legs up over his arms, taking me against the wall. He kissed me deeply, nudging my cheek with his nose, then resting his forehead against my own.
“My life,” he repeated, kissing me again.
“Faster,” I pleaded. “Please…?”
He nodded against my forehead, and he complied. I clenched my eyes shut, before I moved my head to latch into his shoulder, his blood hitting my tongue. And suddenly, I reached it. I reached that wonderful peak and I was squirming, struggling to not thrash too hard as I shoved hips into his.
“Don’t pull out to release….?” I asked. “It isn’t always a sure thing, pregnancy. But I… you are my husband, and I am willing to create life with you. We’re not in danger from the king, now. Please…?”
He looked at me with wide eyes, surprised. His face flushed. “Are you… are you certain?”
“Yes! You are my life, Dragon. You are my everything. Please… please take this chance with me. I have never been more certain..”
He groaned as he kissed me, his pace speeding up a bit more and finally he tensed as he gasped into my mouth, a long, deep grown leaving his lips as he pressed me ever harder into the wall, and I felt incredible warmth.
“To taking a chance, my life.”
I loved making these memories.