Black Romance - 14 My Room

“The usual.” Wrapping my arms around my waist, I crossed my legs.

His eyes flicked up, mouth hanging open. “Don’t fuck with me, Jessie, I really don’t want to have to take you to Virgo again.”

Hanging my head, I lifted my fingers to my mouth and fumbled with my lips. “A dance and a blow-job—the usual.” Shrugging my shoulder, I let my eyes dance between his.

Arching a brow, he stood quiet for a long second. My heart started racing inside my chest, nervous that he could see right through my lie.

Fuck, fuck, fuck. I lied. If he knows—

“Why are you still standing here? You can go.” His voice was hard, but there was no threat in his tone.

He believes me.

A wave of relief washed over me, allowing my body to relax. Sitting at my table, I looked around to see if anyone was watching me.

Vin was getting money from Aubrey, a girl who had come into Virgo’s hands recently. I felt bad for her. Her room was right next to mine and I could hear her crying herself to sleep every night.

From what I knew, he had received her as payment for a past due loan from a man named Napal. It was either pay or die. Napal chose death for her instead of for himself. It was the cowards way out, because there was no way she would survive this place.

I could see it on her face, in the way her body slumped, and how the deep rings under her eyes showed just how damaged she was from all this.

This world divided the weak from the strong. You either grew skin as thick as bark or you crumbled like the delicate shell of an egg.

Aubrey was cracked all over.

Slipping the cash out from between my legs, I quickly stuffed it into the pocket that held the padding on the sports bra I had on when I came in. Taking another look around, no one seemed to notice me at all.

It’s all clear.

The rest of the night went as it typically did. I did a few more dances on stage, I trolled the floor, doing lap dances and snuggling up to guys, chatting away until their wallets were empty.

Salt had left, but I found myself periodically searching out the room for him, checking the dark corners to see if he was still there.

He wasn’t, and each time I felt a little more empty, a little more deflated that he was really gone.

What the fuck am I doing?

As the night came to an end, and the men slowly trickled out, I was left wondering what the hell was happening to me. I couldn’t get Salt out of my head, I couldn’t stop my thoughts from drifting to the man who had eyes that were cold as ice but warmed me inside like a hot fire in the same breath. A man who had muscles that looked like they could drown you in fear and keep you safe at the same time.

Just stop, Jessie. He’s just another asshole with money to burn.

One of the guards closed the door to my room after I stepped inside. Listening for the lock, I stood silent until I heard the click and the loud thump of his feet carrying him away.

The silence in the room was deafening. I hated it. There was no television, no radio, no phone or computer. All I had were my thoughts, and those were slowly killing me inside.

This is your life. You just have to accept it.

Taking a long hot shower, I scrubbed the feel of gross hands off my body until my skin was red and raw. The soap never felt like enough, I needed more. I needed to see the top layer of my skin disappear, ensuring that any and all remnants of the men from the club were gone.

Climbing onto the paper-thin mattress, I snuggled under the scratchy wool blanket and covered myself up to my shoulders.

Salt popped into my head, his black eyes mesmerizing me even in my thoughts. They looked like shaded pools, so deep they could be bottomless, tempting me to jump inside.

I’m not going to think about him.

There’s no point.

Burying my head under the pillow, I curled it around my ears, trying to stop my mind from running wild.