Black Romance - 19 Can I Ask You Something?

Jessie

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I knew what to do.The idea had taken hold of me and I couldn’t get it out of my head.

Salt had said there were things he could do for me. There was no way for me tell if that was a good or a bad thing. I suppose there could have been malice laced in his words, that his offer was built purely on self gratification and not the way I wanted it to sound.

Maybe I was being gullible, because I desperately wanted to believe that what he said was meant for good, that it was meant to help. That he was what I had been waiting for.

But how do you trust someone you don’t know?

Fixing myself a sandwich, I sat down on the couch and started eating. Taking small bites, I forced the stale bread and processed cheese sandwich down with a glass of water.

I’m so fucking sick of sandwiches.

Peeling off the hard crust, it pinged on the plate as I dropped it on top. Setting the plate on the cushion beside me, I laid back, resting my head against my arms.

Aubrey had been crying on and off since we were brought back to our rooms. Which was a little better than the previous days.

Sitting up straight, I stared at the wall where the sounds were coming from. I wasn’t sure why, but the need to comfort this poor girl was weighing heavily on me.

Because all you ever wanted was a real friend, that’s why.

Climbing to my feet, I carefully stepped to the wall, as if the sound of my walking would spook her. Placing my ear to the thin sheet rock, I tapped the wall quietly with my nail and listened.

Aubrey hiccuped a subtle gasp, obviously startled by the sound. I could hear her shifting around in her room and feel her body against the wall as she pressed herself into the material.

She didn’t speak, I wasn’t even sure if she was breathing, but I knew her head was pushed as tightly against the wall as mine was.

Tap tap, bouncing my finger, I waited.

The seconds ticked by, the only sound I could hear was the blood pumping between my ears.

Tap tap, repeating the noise, I stood as still as I could, hoping she would tap back.

She didn’t.

It’s better this way, you can’t get her killed.

Letting out a slow breath, I wandered over to my bed and laid down. Laying my hand over my stomach, I ran my plan through my head. Salt was giving me an offer in not so many words. There were meanings hidden between the lines, words I might be manifesting to life by pure desperation; but I didn’t care.

I had to grasp at something in order to keep this feeling inside me alive. A small flicker of hope had started to burn in my gut. It had been years since I felt that, since I could visualize a way out of this fucking place.

Tink tink. . .

Popping upright in bed, I sat still, unsure if my mind was playing tricks on me. There were all kinds of noises that could be heard throughout this place.

Pipes clanked and spit as water ran through them, the floor boards creaked and twisted from the guards that casually walked the halls, making sure we were all safely secured. Rain would splash against the roof, the gentle splatter another reminder that there was still an entire world I’d never see outside those walls.

Tink tink.

There it was again. Throwing my feet over the side of the bed, the sound was coming from the wall that separated Aubrey and myself.

It’s her, she’s signaling back.

Darting across the room on the tips of my toes, I quickly gave three taps back. Aubrey mimicked my beat, giving me three more.

“Aubrey,” I said, pushing my voice out in a low whisper.

Tink.

“You can talk softly, I should be able to hear you.”

“What about the guards?” she asked, her voice so quiet I had to strain to hear her.

Her voice sounded like it was coming from the seam of the wall and the floor, so I slid down to my haunches, keeping one shoulder and ear against the wall.

“We have a little bit before they come back around, they do sweeps every thirty minutes or so. How are you feeling?”

It was a dumb question. I knew how she felt. She felt like shit, she felt like her life was over, she felt all the same things everyone else did about being there.

“Are you sure it’s safe to do this?”

“Sure enough,” I responded with a giggle, doing my best to make light of a horrible situation. “It feels good to talk to someone else that isn’t one of Virgo’s goons, I can tell you that.”

“It really does.”

Relaxing my head against the wall, I sat on my ass, curling my legs underneath me. “Where are you from?”

I was trying to make small talk. It seemed like the proper thing to do when you were talking to someone you knew nothing about.

“Florence,” she said, her accent fairly light for someone born in Italy. “You?”

“Boston.”

“Where’s that?”

“The U.S.”

“That’s a world away from here.” She sounded much more relaxed, almost at ease. We sat silent for a moment, and I don’t think either of us really knew how to have a normal conversation anymore.

What do you say?

What do you ask?

It wasn’t like we had lives to talk about outside that place. Memories equaled more pain, and I wanted to avoid the pain.

“Can I ask you something?” she finally questioned.

“Sure.” Picking at my fingers, I kept my hands in my lap.