Blazing Armour - Chapter 181

Ren Yu washed his face and rinsed his mouth several times before he cleaned the dry powder of his mouth and nose.

The toxicity of dry powder is low. It doesn’t hurt to eat it at all, but he still can’t breathe as if he was poisoned. Something choked in his throat and couldn’t swallow or spit out, which made him have a headache.

He supported the washing table with both hands and looked at the wet face in the mirror. His soft hair was clinging to his cheek, just as listless as his owner.

The hair is long. It’s time to cut it.

Ren Yu thought.

It seemed that he hadn’t looked in the mirror carefully for a long time. At this time, he found that his appearance had changed.

The first thing his father said when he saw him was probably “Why are you thin again”. He had already thought out his words, but unexpectedly, his father didn’t ask him or even remember who he was.

His father has been ill for several years. He is not unprepared for losing control, but he has to be sad every time he sees it, without exception.

Another person appeared in the mirror and looked at Ren Yu in the mirror.

Gong Yingxian looked at him with concern and handed him a bottle of mineral water: “is it better? Do you want to go to the hospital for gastric lavage?”

“It’s not that serious.” Ren Yu took the water and drank, “where’s my father?”

“He’s fine. The doctor gave him a little tranquilizer.”

Ren Yi lowered his head and breathed slowly.

“I can provide captain Ren with…”

“No.” Ren Yu stopped him and said, “stop talking.”

Gong Yingxian looked at Ren Yu’s tired face from the mirror. He was very distressed. He walked over and gently stroked Ren Yu’s spine with his big hand: “it’s too hard to take care of the patient alone. I really want to help you.”

Ren Yu shook his head silently. In retrospect, since his father was ill, the most relaxed and comfortable time he had with his father was in Gong Yingxian’s private hospital, but he also knew that it was both public and private, and he could not accept these again.

It’s hard. There’s nothing hard for a man to live. At least he has his father.

Ren Yu gets up and wants to avoid Gong Yingxian, but he is suddenly held in his arms by Gong Yingxian.

The long lost embrace, the familiar broad chest, the warm breath and the overbearing power made Ren Yu lose his mind for a moment. He should refuse, but he found that he really wanted a hug now.

Gong Yingxian’s voice was hoarse. “I really want to help you and solve all your troubles for you, so that you will never worry about anything, but you never ask me for help and carry everything by yourself. Why aren’t you an ordinary… Ordinary person.”

“… I’m an ordinary person. Ordinary people just want to solve their own problems.”

“But I hope you can rely on me.”

Ren Yi wanted to ask, are you reliable, but he held back and sighed, “I’m going to see my father.”

Gong Yingxian reluctantly let go.

Ren Yi turned to go. Gong Yingxian grabbed him again and said, “wait.” He carefully brushed the dry powder off his hair.

The two stood facing each other, their breath gushing on each other’s face. It was hot and itchy. Gong Yingxian didn’t know whether it was intentional or unintentional. His lips wanted to hit the tip of Ren Yu’s nose several times.

While Ren Yu was in a trance, Gong Yingxian suddenly lowered his head and kissed the small mole on the bridge of Ren Yu’s nose.

It is reasonable to say that they have done anything shameful. They are always confused for a restrained kiss, but Ren Yu is palpitating uncontrollably. He stepped back, crossed the palace and left.

Gong Yingxian looked at the empty hands and felt disappointed. It was a hard won luck to be able to hug the people who wanted to hug.

The doctor gave Ren Xiangrong a low dose of tranquilizer. He didn’t fall asleep. He just calmed down from his restlessness and anxiety. He lay in bed, stared at the ceiling and talked.

Ren Yu sat at the head of the bed and looked at his father silently, with melancholy in his eyes and speechless in his mouth.

Gong Yingxian found a chair and sat next to Ren Yu, silent with him.

For a long time, Ren Yu said, “my father was the same as me when he was young. Everyone said that our father and son were alike. They were alike in appearance, temper and experience. They were so alike.” Ren Yu said softly, “my father used to be as healthy and strong as me. He was always the first to rush into the fire. It’s not ambiguous to play his life in order to save people. My father has saved countless people in his life. He has made great contributions to Lei Lei Lei, but when it’s time to enjoy his retirement life, he got sick and was ill without signs.”

Gong Yingxian looks at Ren Yu, and his heart hurts.

“My father imagined many times what he would do when he retired and where he would travel by car. He took a look at all the places he had never seen in the squadron for many years. As a result… I don’t understand why God didn’t treat him well. At that time, I had a lot of resentment in my heart.” Ren Yu said with a sob in his voice, “a man who seems to have endless energy is suddenly tied up by illness and needs help to go downstairs. He is much worse than me, but he has never complained in front of me. He always said, he said… He is lucky to retire with all his hair and all his tail.”

Gong Yingxian comforted softly, “the old captain is more open-minded than you think when he sees more life and death.”

Ren Yi took his father’s hand and gently held it: “you know, this disease has a certain genetic probability.”

Gong Yingxian immediately said, “don’t worry. The probability is very low. Now there are also means to detect and prevent in the early stage. Moreover, the medical level has risen to another level after 30 years.” Of course, he knew that since he knew Ren Xiangrong’s disease, he began to adjust the proportion of scientific research topics in the hospital. In the past, his hospital mainly focused on cardiovascular and cerebrovascular diseases, high mortality and disability diseases such as myocardial infarction, cerebral infarction and stroke. Alzheimer’s disease is only one part of them. Since this year, he has increased his budget by 30% and cooperated with top universities at home and abroad, This topic tilts half of the resources of the whole hospital. He would never let Ren Yu fall into such pain.

“Thirty years later, I’m not worried. I just… I’m a little uncomfortable today.” Ren Yu holds Ren Xiangrong’s hand, which is covered with all kinds of scars, burns, scalds, collision and pressure, chemical corrosion, rough and deformed. It is a pair of hands relying on life and a pair of hands full of honor.

Gong Yingxian stretched out his hand and put his palm on his warm cheek: “no matter what happens, I will always be by your side.”

Ren Yu was silent for a few seconds and said, “Ying Xian, I’m most afraid of instability in my career. If I can’t concentrate on the battlefield, it’s easy to have an accident.”

Gong Yingxian realized what Ren Yu was going to say, and it must not be what he wanted to hear, but he could only listen hard.

“But now my mind is full of you and our disputes. I think of your good and your bad. I don’t want to hurt you and don’t want you to hurt me. I don’t know how we go down, but you’re still approaching step by step.” Ren Yu’s expression and voice are very calm, like the calm water surface under the warm sun in early spring, brewing the whole winter, just for this moment of silent ice melting, so I can’t find a wrinkle, “I said I hope to calm down for a period of time, not escape, I really want to… Calm down, and you keep appearing in front of me, I can’t calm down.”

Gong Yingxian’s heart and lungs hurt so much that he forgot or temporarily lost his ability to breathe. He stared at Ren Yu in a daze, and his eyes were getting wet.

“I’m going to study out of work soon. After half a year, I’ll go back to the Armed Police University to study for my master’s degree. This is arranged by the detachment and a cooling off period for me. I haven’t been given up yet. I’m very satisfied.” Ren Yu looked into the deep eyes of Gong Yingxian, “can we not meet for the time being?”

Gong Yingxian’s tears hovered at the edge of his eyes and would not fall.

The glittering and translucent tears were like too dazzling light in the night, which made Ren Yu almost unable to open his eyes. He was overwhelmed by heartache and even wanted to take back his words word by word, but he knew in his heart that the ridge between him and Gong Yingxian had grown fiercely in the wind and had become a wall.

In the past, even if it was a mountain, he would have to turn over, but now he is afraid. He is afraid of turning over one and another. All his efforts are in vain.

Gong Yingxian asked softly, “is this what you want?”

“This is what we need.” Ren Yu replied, “emotionally, I am more mature than you. If I only rely on impulse and ignore the consequences, we may lose both of us in the end.”

Gong Yingxian endured the pain of gouging out his heart and nodded hard, “OK.”

Ren Yu said goodbye.

“Can I send you a message?”

“… well.”

“Then when can I see you?”

“When I’m ready to face you.”

Gong Yingxian wanted to find out when it was, but he didn’t ask.

Ren Ying hardened his heart and said, “go back. I want to keep a vigil here tonight.”

Gong Yingxian stood up slowly, stiffened for a moment, bent down again, printed a kiss on Ren Yu’s lips, and whispered, “I like you, I love you, I won’t hesitate to die for you, don’t give up on me.”

Ren Yu unconsciously stretched out his hand. It seemed that he was going to pull Gong Yingxian’s clothes, but he immediately woke up and pasted Gong Yingxian’s heart with his palm. Is this a vigorous heart beating only for himself at the moment?

Ren Yu patted the heart: “take care of yourself.”

Gong Yingxian got up and left.

Listening to the sound of the door closing, Ren’s tears burst out.

He suddenly remembered Qiu Yan’s warning to him.

Did he become an irresponsible “adult”?

But the “child”, he is naive and cruel.