Can I really keep my Goddess Wife to myself and away from all the Crazy OP MCs - 76 Chapter 75.

(POV Sanji)

She’s gone already? Does my wife hate me now? Is she just playing around with me and seeing other men while telling me not to cheat? No, that can’t really be the case. I refuse to believe that.

She may tease me alot, but she doesn’t seem like that type of woman. Well, my real reason for believing that she wouldn’t do something like that was because any man who tried would probably be lead to their death. She was a goddess of calamity after all. Over the last week I used some LP to find out more about my wife through the system shop.

She trusts me enough to allow me access to all sorts of information about her. Thanks to it I’ve gained a much better understanding of her. She’s never been in love before from the information I’ve gathered so far.

There were suitors in the past, but they always mysteriously disappeared one by one. My wife had long given up on thoughts of such a relationship. At least, that was until she met me.

From one of the memory fragments I got from the system shop I was able to understand fully the events behind our meeting. My wife could not stay in one realm for a long period of time. Even in the upper realms where her father was, she realized she couldn’t stick around for long or misfortune would befall even them.

By the time she realized this it was already too late and the misfortune that had built up around her father was to a level where a calamity was bound to befall him. That was about three billion years ago.

Two billion years ago she also left her master to venture the realms to seek out a method to suppress the impending calamities that could potentially befall the people close to her. As for that master of hers, I’m not going to lie, her master was at the same level of my wife in terms of appearance, but she had a far superior sex appeal.

If my wife was the sort of mischievous fox who jumped about from place to place. Then her master, on the other hand, was truly a demonic seductress who sucked men dry and left woman trembling in ecstacy.

For the past two billion years she has ventured across uncountable realms. She didn’t spend much time in each realm, ranging from a bit under a month to almost a year. There was a time where she tested how long she was able to stay in each type of realm. If it was a mortal realm, normally she could only stay for a month before it would be brought to the verge of collapse.

Only the upper god realm she was born in could withstand her presence. Middle god realms could withstand her presence for a hundred thousand years. Lower god realms would last one thousand years before it reached its breaking point. Saint realms were the realms right above mortal realms, she could stay within them for about one year before they nearly collapsed.

All alone, for two billion years, my wife moved from place to place without anywhere she called a home. If she stayed for too long disasters would follow.

It wasn’t until just over a month in where she stepped into my realm. The moment she did she was astounded by the aura of fortune contained within the realm. From one end to the next it was as though the entire realm was blessed with boundless fortune.

My wife had heard of this realm far off in the boonies from her master one time and hadn’t had much hope for it initially. While her master heard of this realm from some clown she had fooled around with that happened to be a distant relative of Sen Kami. He was a certain religious figure known in our realm and was the son of a certain lower god that accidentally stumbled upon our realm. None of the gods in the upper gods realms took notice of the mortal realm back then or took the clown’s words seriously.

After all, it was deemed the weakest mortal realm. All the gods had their heads far above the clouds, how could they seriously turn their eyes towards some insignificant mortal realm out in the boonies?

It was only when my wife actually went first hand to my realm in the spur of the moment, out of pure curiosity to see for herself the veracity of the clown’s story did she stumble upon me. Back then the clown boasted that it was a low level realm where a party trick, like turning water to wine, would make people worship you. However, after some time passed, he realized that the realm was much unlike other realms.

The humans of this realm, instead of advancing in cultivation, they advanced technologically instead through science. The inhabitants of this realm also heavily focused on the entertainment industry. Yes, that was what my realm came to be known for in the eyes of gods. A convenient place that had many ways to pass the time.

It was a backward realm where instead of pursuing a long boring life, we pursued enjoying our short lives to the fullest.

On the other hand, my wife that visited the realm for the first time witnessed the unbelievable levels of fortune and suspected their had to be some sort of source. It was unnatural for such good fortune to exist after all.

After searching throughout the entire realm she eventually narrowed down the source and discovered the planet Earth. She locked onto the source located on Earth where it all originated from and teleported directly behind it.

When she got too close, the sudden increase in strength of the fortune surrounding her caught her off guard which led to that sneeze of hers.

Everyone knows how the rest of that story played out. The freakishly fortunate idiot who died thanks to being shocked by an ethereal fairy became the husband of the beauty who could never be wed due to her misfortune.

How can I doubt a woman who spent two billion years searching for a way to go against her misfortune like that? A woman who ventured forth on her own for two billion years completely isolating herself from others to avoid causing random disasters. Of course there were many times where she still caused disasters, but there was nothing she could do about them.

At the beginning, just existing was painful for her, but over time she became colder, more desolate, uncaring and indifferent. She became a social misfit and was unable to understand others well. People pursued her blinded by her beauty, but they would all eventually mysteriously disappear or die. When she was younger she never thought much of it because she thought death was a common occurrence. It wasn’t until she noticed those who ended up hurt were only hurt after they met her.

Due to her lacking interaction with others, her personality developed to become slightly childish at times. She didn’t like overly serious people and preferred to take things as they come.

She was aware that those that disappeared were among the more fortunate group of individuals. She was also aware that her father played a part in a majority of those disappearances as he feared his daughter being hurt by their inevitable death.

However, one day, she returned to her upper realm and pleaded with her father to save a random mortal without telling him the real reason. She said it was because she felt bad, but it was because she believed she could use my fortune to fend off and deter any calamities her loved ones may face thanks to her.

She’s really unreasonable though. Placing your hopes on a weak mortal like me, aren’t you just a dying man grasping at straws? After I came to learn of these things I felt a bit used, but somehow, I didn’t want to let her down.

Yes, although I didn’t want to let her down, I still didn’t want to bore myself to death trying to speed up my cultivation.

Isn’t there an even easier way for me to speed up my breakthroughs? Don’t underestimate human laziness, humans from my realm advance even quicker because of laziness.

It’s really thanks to laziness that a lot of our technology was created. Laziness was really a never ending cycle of advancement.

For example, this was one particular man’s conundrum in my world.

You don’t want to do mental math? Well, here’s an abacus. Enjoy.

What you don’t want to use an abacus anymore? You say it’s too tedious? Well, here’s a calculator. You just need to punch in some buttons and it will tell you the answer without you having to think at all.

You find that pressing buttons is too tedious? Well, here’s a program that can just take a picture of the problem and answer it for you.

Oh is that still to difficult?! Well, that’s alright, we’ve got just the thing for you, voice recognition software, just say the equation and it will enter the numbers for you and even tell you what the solution is if you are to lazy to read what the answer is.

Is that still not enough for your lazy ass?! Fine! We’ll just get a computer to predict what your problem is and answer it for you! What?! What do you mean you’re too lazy to even think what the problem is?! Okay! Okay! We get it! The computer will just do everything for you in your pathetic life! Just go to sleep or something you useless incompetent bum!

See? Laziness is truly how humans advance.

I’m already somehow advancing by leaps and bounds without doing anything, but how do I advance even faster by doing even less? It is truly the conundrum of the century; no, rather than century, the conundrum of the millenia. Maybe that’s not right either, after all, as a cultivator I need to think big exaggerated numbers or I’m not doing my job right. Let’s go with the conundrum of the infinitium. Yeah, that sounds about right for a cultivator.

While I was lost deep in thought over these world shaking matters, I naturally didn’t notice the curious and worried gaze directed towards me from my big sister who was squat down in front of me at eye level.

I only snapped out of it when she opened her mouth and asked, “are you okay now?”

When I looked directly into her eyes, although she forced an expressionless face, I still noticed the embarrassment and bashfulness hidden within her eyes.

What is with my sister right now? It couldn’t really be what my wife said, right? Did something happen while I was unconscious? Why? Why do all the good things happen when I’m not conscious?

Do the heavens really have eyes? This is rigged, it must be! It’s a conspiracy I tell you!

“San, are you really fine now?”

“Yes, I am.”

“Did something happen while I was unconscious?”

“No, nothing happened.”

Suspicious. Too suspicious. Please don’t awkwardly avert your gaze so blatantly and say nothing happened.

My wife told me not to cheat on her, but did something really happen between my sister and I?

“You’re sure you did nothing to me while I was unconscious?”

I said that with a stern expression on my face, upon which she lowered her gaze and just nodded meekly with a “mmm” sound without saying another word.

Who is this cute creature? This definitely cannot be my sadistic big sister. The gap was too great from what I was used to seeing. Even I’m not stupid enough to not realize it by now. Something definitely happened between my sister and the unconscious I. The expression of a maiden in love, even I wasn’t blind enough to not notice it when it was this explicit.

What have I done? I should have just come clean from the beginning. Wait, not all is lost just yet. I can still save the situation. I just need to get her to dislike me and like someone else. That crown prince, I must get these two together as soon as possible.

“Big brother San, let’s play.”

Oi. Kid, were you not informed I almost died? You sure don’t look even the slightest bit worried for a kid. Once again she’s really confirmed my suspicions of becoming someone great. She could probably be a great dictator one day if she really wanted to be one.

Since I was fine now and I wanted to get out of this awkward situation with my big sister, I accented to her request. “Sure, what do you want to play?”

“VR Racing.”

What? Did I hear that correctly?

“Sorry, I’m not familiar with that game. How do you play VR Racing?”

“Don’t worry, it’s really fun and easy to play. Just sit in the pod over there and we can play right away.”

I had always wondered what that pod was over the past week, apparently it’s turned out to be something ridiculous.

“Uhm, little girl, this pod… the VR you mentioned wouldn’t really stand for virtual reality, would it?”

“Of course it does.”

“And who made this game?”

“I did.”

Ah, she was already someone great. I couldn’t stop the sweat from rolling down my back. I graduated with a degree in electrical engineering and have not even a shred of related work experience. Yet you’re telling me this little girl is a monster who made a VR game?

“By the way, who created this pod?”

“Me.”

“You’re not lying to me, are you?”

“Of course I’m not. What do you take me for, a liar?”

“Did you start studying from your mother’s womb?”

She showed a troubled look on her face before she reluctantly nodded her head.

What is with that troubled look?! Don’t take the question seriously now!

“You’re pulling my leg, right?”

“Big brother San, I have never told a lie in my life.”

“That’s a lie, right?”

“No.”

She’s definitely lying, there is no freaking way I will believe a five year old child made VR a reality. This is definitely a scam.

“So, who really made it?”

“I did.”

Don’t blink innocently at me while tilting your head in confusion like you can’t understand why I asked again! I’m not having a mental breakdown or anything. I’m really not. I swear I’m not!

“The future me made it.”

Ahh. Ahhh. Ahhhhh. She’s just dropping bombs left and right now.

“Little girl, it’s not nice to lie.”

“But it’s true.”

Be cool me. Be cool. Just play it off like you are all knowing.

“So you’re a time traveller.” I said that casually like it was a common occurrence.

“Eh? Well, I guess so.”

What do you mean you guess so? Are you going for a stroll to pick some cabbage from the fields? Oh well, I guess I’ll go pick some cabbage. Is that the extent to secrecy of being a time traveller?!

Are you the little girl who leapt through time?!

Damn it, If you’re a time traveller prove it! Oh how I wish I could say that.

“Then little girl, you should be aware of how this world ends, right?”

“You know too?”

“Of course I do. What do you take me for?”

“Uhm. Are you two okay in the head?”

“Shina, we’re having a serious discussion here that concerns the future of the world.”

“Ah. Okay.”

I can see your doubtful eyes big sister. Don’t worry, I’m not crazy, I swear.

Wait! If I make her think I’m crazy, without having to hurt her, she would dislike me more right? How do I make her think I’m crazy though? Strip and run around the room naked? No way! That’s way too embarrassing. Randomly have a seizure? No way, that is too unbecoming of a refined master. How about the sealed devil within my right hand? Too childish.

“Big brother San, do you really know how the world ends?”

“Due to greed, humans depleted their resources and tensions between countries heightened until wars break out. These tensions led to the third world war where every country was in it for themselves. In the arms race, humans eventually brought an end to their own planet. Thanks to increased technological development, humans initiate a project to transport all humans remaining on the planet to another planet. They drift about in space for uncountable years until they finally find a habitable planet they can spread their roots on. However, unexpectedly, civilization already existed on that planet. Humans suddenly became the aliens and invaders on this planet. That planet also had a new form of energy that only residents of that world was capable of wielding. It was something humans had long ago termed magic or mana. Thus began a war between a civilization fueled by technology and a civilization utilizing magic.”

“Big brother San, is all of that really true?! I knew about how our planet ended, but I didn’t know about what came after that.”

Eh? For real?! You mean I was right about how the planet ended? I just made that shit up though.

“I was part of one of the plans the people in the far off future came up with to change the course of the world. Are you saying that, no matter what I try to do to alter the future, it won’t change?”

Holy shit! What kind of plot did I just stumble upon here? Little girl, this should be top secret right? Why are you blabbing all this to me when I’m just making up random nonsense?

Like I were possessed I just kept spouting more nonsense without any basis. “No, it will not change. Right now you are on what I would call world line branch A, where all paths lead to the same outcome. If you wished to get to a world line where the planet does not face it’s demise you must reach what I would call world line branch B.”

Holy crap! Some unbelievable lie just came out of my mouth! It’s just the storyline to a really good anime I watched before. Will she buy it?

“Big brother San, so it’s just like we theorized in the future then. Just like that anime predicted, there were two world line branches after all. We failed this time, but next time for sure.”

“Little girl, did you only send your memories of the future and technological know how back to the past?”

“Of course. Well, according to what you’ve said big brother San, I’ve only sent my memories to a world line that is part of branch A. Big brother San, how do I send my memories to branch B?”

“Little girl, it’s useless you know. Even if you go to another world line, the previous world lines still exist. The lives that were lost in those world lines, the planet that fell, they do not just disappear. If you get to branch B, you might not even be needed to lead to the path where the world didn’t face destruction you know.”

The little girl just looked at me with sad despairing eyes.

“So, nothing will change regardless of my efforts?”

“Nothing will change, your resistance is futile. This world will end. All good things must come to an end.”

“Uuuuu. Sniff. Sniff.”

Ah, I made this adorable creature cry. I started to feel like a big bad bully for making up all these lies just to make my big sister think I was crazy while keeping up the appearance of an all knowing master in front of the little girl.

“Of course, you were not the only plan humans from your realm came up with little girl. They also left behind their hope in another more unlikely possibility. Of course it was one in which they were unable to be apart of. They left behind one individual in cryogenic sleep in an indestructible structure that would not decay or be destroyed over time on planet Earth. That person rested for several billion years, during which there was a planetary collision resulting in the complete destruction of Earth. Eventually, the planet reformed and as time passed it once again became habitable. The person they left behind then led the new inhabitants of the world using technology left behind from the old planet Earth towards a path where the world was sustainable.”

Ah, my lie just got even more out of hand. What is wrong with this mouth of mine? Why is my mouth looser than a prostitute in the red light district right now?

“Really?”

“Yes, really.”

“Really, really?”

“Yes, really, really.”

How’s that big sister, all this crazy talk should make you dislike me, right? When I looked at her what I saw left me facepalming. They were the warm gentle eyes that one would use to look at a father figure soothing a child by telling them a bedtime story.

We were being serious, okay?

Can you not act like a maiden blinded by your love?

“Big brother San, let’s play already!”

“Haaaah. Alright, fine.”

Seeing as there was no progress towards lowering my big sister’s flag I could only resignedly enter the pod and play the alleged VR Racing game.

I sat down in the pod and found it was rather roomy. The little girl crawled in and sat directly on my lap like the most natural thing in the world.

She looked towards my big sister with a confused expression before she said, “big sister Shina, why aren’t you coming in?”

“What? But, wouldn’t it be too cramped in there for three people?”

“Don’t worry big sister Shina, it’s a pod designed for couples. Since I’m on big brother San’s lap, you can just squeeze in beside him.”

Oi. Kid, you’re actually plotting against me, aren’t you?

“Are you sure?”

Stop blushing and looking downwards while fidgeting with your hair. Please big sister, turn back to the normally cold, expressionless, sadistic big sister I know. At this rate, there is no way I can possibly reveal I am really her little brother.

“Of course!”

The devil, this child is the devil! What are you doing casually signing my death sentence on your own like that little girl?

She crawled into the pod and squeezed herself in and laid down beside me. The little girl on my lap smiled gleefully and said out loud, “game start, VR Racing.”

The next thing I knew, my vision turned black and the little girl on my lap disappeared. When I looked to my side, my big sister had also vanished.

A few moments afterwards, the world around me lit up. My first thought was horror. Absolute horror. Is this really okay? No one’s going to get sued for this, right? I looked at the ground into a puddle and saw my reflection. I had a stupid red hat on my head along with a blue and red plumber suit. There was also a stupid mustache on my once cleanly shaved face.

I can cry, right? I’m allowed to cry, right? I don’t even know what’s happening anymore. First it was a world of cultivation, then a prison themed after a certain book/movie and now it’s a VR world themed after a certain video game?

Is this just a dream? Do I really exist? What is existing anyways? What is the meaning of life? While I escaped to the realm of delusions, a certain short female toad character dressed in pink appeared beside me.

“Big brother San, what are you just standing around for? The race is about to start, get in your vehicle.”

“Ah. Uh. Yeah.”

With a blank expression I mindlessly got into the vehicle at my side.

“3. 2. 1. Go!”