Can I really keep my Goddess Wife to myself and away from all the Crazy OP MCs - 79 Chapter 78.

(POV Chu Yue)

Stupid random earthquake, I just want to sleep and dream about master. Are even the heavens plotting against my dreams? Give me a break.

After I was startled out of my mind and fell off my bed due to the unexpected earthquake, I couldn’t fall asleep again. Since that was the case I figured I’d surf the net a bit so I headed over to the usual manga cafe to waste some time. I really don’t want to practice such unfeminine death metal screams.

For some reason I felt like an author running away and procrastinating under the pressure of his incoming self imposed deadline.

However, I was not avoiding my work, this was all for the sake of educational purposes. Yes, this was research. I am a woman of high standards. How can I let this tiny wall known as death metal block my path? Thus I searched up in g*ogle, “how to death metal.”

The first result was a video so I opened it up. What I found was a guy holding an electric guitar. He gave a few simple instructions on the notes to play. At the end he was even nice enough to provide a phone number if one wanted to find out more about death metal, it was “1-800-YOU-STFU.”

“…”

“Like hell you’re nice! Are you kidding me?!”

Ugh, next. The second video left me even more confused. It was something about drums being cats, books, ‘pings dings tings’ and later on about an electric guitar and ‘banana, bun, quack.’

Wow, death metal is so deep. Don’t be deceived by my hollow eyes clearly showing my lack of understanding. I’m not raging on the inside or anything either.

What the hell is all of that nonsense even supposed to mean?!

Whatever, what’s important is the scream, yes, the scream. I changed up my search query to “how to death metal scream.” Finally I got some more serious results compared to my first unsuccessful search query. I looked through a few different videos and came to an understanding.

Death metal screams were actually a lot harder than I first thought. I might actually have a talent for it when I consider how successful I was earlier. It might just be thanks to being a cultivator and having better control over my body though.

There were some instructional videos that broke down the various death metal screams step by step. I had a pen and paper with me so I took down the important points like a good student.

After I finished with the boring research I figured it was time to take a break. Naturally I started searching for cat pictures to soothe my weary soul. However, as time went on I fell further and further into depravity and found myself at a very strange part of the internet. I had heard rumours of this weird part of the internet.

I won’t go into much detail, but whoever made this stuff should just die. I might be a bit scarred, I don’t think I want to see another cat again. Why would harmless cats become so daring and perverse?

I closed all those obscene cat pictures and with renewed vigor I started to research further on even more perverse cat pictures, I mean death metal. Ehem. I misthought just now.

I listened to the many different types of screams and how to make them until I felt confident enough to practice them myself.

In the deepest satanic death metal voice I could muster, I screamed out a few practice lines, “I will donate money to charity. I will help old grandmas cross the road. I will give you compliments. I will end your world… poverty.”

“Pfft. What the hell? It sounds so stupid.”

Knock. Knock. Knock.

Ah. I forgot it was a manga cafe and got a bit carried away.

I felt embarrassed to stick around after my slip, so I quickly left the room. I can’t practice here after all or I will probably get kicked out or at the worst banned.

As usual, on my way out, there was a large group of people staring at me in secret. They likely thought I didn’t notice them, but they were dealing with a cultivator with heightened senses. However, this time, among the crowd, there were three suspicious individuals sitting together near the exit that were covertly throwing occasional glances towards my direction.

When I examined them closer, they appeared to be a bunch of weaklings so I paid no attention to them. Even if they wanted to pick a fight, I normally wouldn’t give them the time of day.

Ignoring them, I left the manga cafe and made my way down the street and turned into an alleyway. After I reached ten meters into the alley I climbed up a ladder to a suspended staircase and waited.

A few minutes later the three suspicious individuals from the manga cafe entered the alleyway. I was hidden behind a metal sheet and peeking through a hole curious as to why they were following me.

When they were directly below me they conveniently stopped like it was the work of some god. Well, of course they didn’t, they just kept walking forward because there were no such convenient events in this world.

Since there were no such convenient events, I stood up from behind the cover of the steel plate and asked, “why are you creepers following me?”

They froze startled in place and awkwardly turned around. I wasn’t really worried about what they would do, but it was a bit creepy being followed like this.

I jumped down from the staircase and landed directly in front of them. With my eyes narrowed and locked on them, I pushed further for a response from them. No lie would slip past someone like me who was far above them in cultivation base.

“Well? Who sent you to follow me?”

“W-w-we’re not really following you in particular or anything like that. I-i-it’s not like we’re your fans or anything either. Don’t get cocky. We don’t think you’re cute either, you ugly! Don’t get ahead of yourself.”

Ugh. What a pain. That was the response of the tsundere sounding nerd in the middle. What the hell? Ugly? Me? Fans? Whose?

“Uhh. So you’re actually fans of mine?”

“Who’re your fans? We’re not fans. Are you deaf? Hmmp!”

“Okay… so if you’re really not fans, why are you stalking me?”

“Con.. wo… rls.. t.”

The nerd on the right who wore a black baggy sweater with his hood up mumbled something I couldn’t quite make out. I was a bit impressed, to be able to speak quiet enough for a cultivator like me to not hear, could he actually be extremely talented?

“Speak up so I can hear you.”

“Constru… wor… gir… re… hot.”

“Damn it, louder maggot!”

“Construction worker girls are hot!”

Ha?

“I’m sorry, I don’t think I quite understand. Is there something wrong with your heads? You know I’m actually an idol in training, right?”

“You are?”

“Yes.”

“Who cares about that? Your main job is as a construction worker, right?”

“No. I’m just a part timer. Idol work is what I plan to make my main job. I also plan to quit construction work as soon as possible.”

“”What?! Why?!””

They looked pretty heartbroken when I said that. It appeared as though their entire lives had just ended, like their raison d’être was cruelly taken away from them. The three of them even started to tear up.

The third stalker on the left even got down on his knees tearfully and prostrated himself before me like he were about to beg me to not quit being a construction worker. However, contrary to my expectations the words that came out of his mouth was, “please carry me on your shoulder and treat me like I’m a sandbag at your workplace, just once is enough! I beg of you!”

“No fair! What are you doing getting one up on us?”

I shook my head robotically to try to snap myself out of it then looked at them with dead eyes and steeled my will and asked, “sorry, I think I misheard. You actually just wanted my autograph, right?”

“Autograph? Why would we want something useless like that?”

He looked up at me from the ground with eyes that felt like they would pierce the heavens in retaliation towards the dumbest question he had ever heard. I can kill this guy, right? It’s not a crime if I’m so disgusted I feel threatened. It’s considered self defense, right?

What’s with that overly defiant look you scumbag? Do I really have to consider these clowns my first fans? A tsundere, a creeper who mumbles everything he says, and a down right pervert with bizarre masochistic fetishes?

Umu. I decided to do the only natural thing. Let’s just leave and act like we saw nothing. I don’t have such fans. Yep, none. I’m just a little idol in training minding her own little business. Escaping from reality was really the only possible solution to my crisis.

As soon as they realized I was leaving they naturally tried to cut me off and block my path. Nope, if that’s what anyone thought, we’d both be wrong. They just silently recollected themselves and with dead serious faces like they were going to war, they started to openly follow behind me like following me was their calling.

Am I actually a commander heading to war or something? Do we have some sort of unspoken understanding here? No this is definitely wrong.

Once I turned the corner and I was out of their line of sight I sprinted away at the fastest speed possible. They were too creepy, I’d really rather not even touch them. I’m a girl okay, there are certain lines I’m not willing to cross. What does that creeper mean, “carry him around like a sandbag anyways?” It’s probably better I don’t know.

After I lost the three stalkers, since I was already out, I figured I’d grab some things to bring back home to eat during the week. I came to a stop outside a convenience store nearby and took a deep breath.

In truth, aside from food, I had an ulterior motive as well and I needed to prepare my heart. After a few moments of silence I braved through my nervousness and strut in with a confident expression. I picked up a few random fashion magazines and some boxed meals before I came to a stop in front of a certain section.

I looked left and right to make sure the coast was clear before I squat down and started the inspect the goods in front of me. I first discovered these items through a pop up advertisement online. When I researched further, I understood it was an essential to have when in a world without alchemy. Herbs that were common in my world for alchemy were very uncommon in this world, in fact nearly none existed. Although there was birth control in this world, it was only effective on those below the mortal realm due to the low level ingredients used.

A woman must always be prepared for battle. Yes, in front of me now was an essential item that I would like to call by code name, the Trojan horse. Who knew how long I’d be in this pocket realm, what if a convenient emergency situation arises where there could be some development with master? Also, if I get him to let his guard down, due to the false sense of security of this thin barrier of protection, and I secretly poke a tiny hole in it, wouldn’t that be perfect? He’ll have no way to escape from taking responsibility.

I’m just kidding, an innocent little girl like me would never think of doing such a devious thing. Please don’t misunderstand me to be a diabolical scheming woman. Just to be clear, the smile stretching from one ear to the other on my face is one of pure innocence.

(POV Megumi)

This girl is definitely scheming something. What are you looking all happy while purchasing a box of condoms and hiding it among food and fashion magazines? Do you really think I’m blind?

I’ve naturally been observing her the whole day to see how she would spend it. In the end she just went to a manga cafe, studied a bit, got stalked, confronted her stalkers, ran away, then went to buy miscellaneous goods along with condoms on her way back home. Hasn’t she gotten a bit too used to this realm?

Not only that, but this brat still has the energy to have designs for my husband when I’m running her ragged? Should I intensify her training? What about getting her a gig on the international space station? She’d then have to get training as an astronaut as well. Haha, I’ll call the program death metal idols in space. Oh well, she’ll need to go up to the moon at some point anyways. Might as well start her training sooner rather than later.

(POV Chu Yue)

After I purchased the goods and left the convenience store I’ve had this strange chill like something bad was going to happen in the near future. I had my suspicions, but I figured I’d ignore it for now. Right now was my next big hurdle. In front of me was a store that sold smartphones.

I naturally did my research on the convenient device known as a smartphone and I was dying of curiosity towards it. If I had one of these, I could naturally talk with master regardless of where he was.

When I walked into the store, a young, fashionable, female store clerk smiled at me and said, “Welcome, were you looking to purchase a new phone?”

“Eh? No, I was just here to look for now. I don’t have enough money to buy one at the moment.”

“Oh? Were you planning to buy one in the near future?”

“Yes.”

“About how soon were you looking to get one?”

“Hopefully, I’ll have enough saved up within the next month.”

“That’s pretty soon, but you know, if you really wanted, we can hook you up with a phone right away. Zero down now while on contract. Would you be interested?”

“Contract? What’s that? Aren’t you supposed to buy them and then sign up for monthly services?”

I had only looked up information on the device itself and its cost. I had never looked into the different types of plans there were when purchasing, so the term contract was a bit foreign to me.

The store clerk looked a bit surprised, but smiled warmly towards the clueless me. I somehow felt like it was the smile of a predator eyeing its prey, but that must have been my imagination. Yeah, the saliva dripping at the side of her mouth and money symbols in her eyes were definitely not there.

“Slurp.”

Yeah, I didn’t hear anything. Nor did I see her casually wipe her lips before she continued on like nothing happened.

“Well, little miss, I can definitely explain all about contracts to you, but calling you little miss is a bit awkward. My name is as you can see, Luna.” She said that as she pointed towards the name on her badge around her neck.

“Ah, right, my name is Chu Yue.”

“It’s a pleasure to do business with you little miss Chu.”

“Likewise.”

“Anyways a contract will actually work out much better for you in the long run. Don’t be an idiot and purchase the phone outright. That’s what idiots will tell you to do. It’s a mutualistic relationship of trust if you choose to go on the contract route. Only hardcore no life shut ins who never leave the area of their Wifi connection will save money by buying the phone outright, but you don’t look like you’d be that type of loser.”

Geh. When I thought back to how I’ve lived my life, doesn’t that more or less summarize it? The majority of my time has been in a cave or the vicinity of my cave cultivating all the time. I only occasionally came out to pursue a certain idiot or mess with little Han.

“What’s wrong little miss Chu? Your face looks a bit cramped up.”

“Haha. It’s nothing, I just remembered something unpleasant.”

“Oh? An ex boyfriend?”

“No. Anyways, about the contract.”

“Right. So if you choose to go with a contract we can have you pay zero down now and you’ll then be able to pay 6500 monthly. This is the best plan we have for the best phone as well, the xPhone Super Plus Plus Extreme Edition. We even have a limited time promotion going on right now for first time customers. Act now and we will actually give you 10000 in store credit which you can use towards any accessories you see on the wall behind me.”

It sounded way too good to be true. There must have been some sort of catch. When she saw I was still skeptical, she kept her professional smile on her face as if she understood my plight.

“It’s not a scam, nor is there anything fishy going on. Our store likes to be honest with our customers and we serve with integrity. The way the contract works is, you will be on this contract for two years. During this time you cannot stop services otherwise you will be required to pay off the remaining balance of the phone at that point in time. This sort of contract is a method to keep customers loyal to us. When the contract is over, you can remain at the same plan cost, or you can choose to enter a new contract with us. You can even trade in your old phone, which will belong to you after the contract is over, for a discount on a new plan.”

“It’s a win win situation. You get a phone with a reasonable plan and we gain a valued loyal customer. How does it sound?”

When I heard her reasoning, it made sense. This type of contract didn’t exist in my realm. Contracts in my realm were typically tied to lives. Contracts like this in my realm had no binding power as only those who had the bigger fist held true power. There were contracts that could destroy a person’s soul, however, those were only used on slaves. Contracts dealing with money were useless since they could easily be broken without repercussions in my realm.

When I considered the amount I made through my construction job, I realized it wouldn’t be difficult to afford a contract like this. Even working one or two shifts a month was enough to cover the cost.

“Deal. I’ll take it.”

“Great. Just fill out this form.”

She handed over a tablet that asked for a bunch of general information such as name, address, date of birth, email address, etc. I filled it all out and used the stylus to electronically sign my name before I handed it back to her. She looked it over and after a few minutes she just nodded and smiled at me.

“I’ll be right back, just give me one moment while I get a new phone from the back. In the meantime, feel free to select 10000 worth of accessories from the wall. Oh, by the way, I’d recommend this cute phone case, I’m sure your boyfriend would think it’s cute as well. Also, this power bank is an absolute essential for a future idol like you.”

Boyfriend?! Would master think I’m cute if I have such a girly phone case? There were a bunch of pink flowers around a cute pink mascot character that looked like a cat centred on the back of the phone case.

When she saw my slightly flustered appearance the store clerk giggled before she headed to the back of the store. Wait, did I ever mention I was an idol in training to her? Ah. Right, I wrote that down without thinking when filling out the form earlier. It was too humiliating to indicate I was in construction, so I put that down instead.

I looked through the accessories and stuck with her suggestions. In the end I settled on a power bank, a wireless charger, and the phone case she suggested. It’s not that I was convinced by her words or anything. I just liked the case a bit was all.

When she came back and saw the items I chose she had a wide knowing smile on her face. Ugh. Please stop looking at me like I’m an open book, I just liked the design a bit, that was all.

The shop clerk helped me set up my phone and showed me how to use it. She also showed me how to add contacts and added her contact information. She claimed it was in case I had any concerns regarding the phone and told me I could contact her any time. I felt a bit thankful, I somewhat appreciated her outgoing personality. It sort of felt like I had made my first female friend since coming to this pocket realm.

Now that I think about it, I don’t really have any female friends back in the sect. Ah. It’s not just the sect, I’ve never made a single female friend in my life. Our sect is so dilapidated that barely any females join it. The few that do hole themselves away and keep to themselves to avoid the large male populace in the sect. As there was no easy way to communicate with each other, most of them just hid in their caves without much interaction with one another other.

I felt a bit moved and I wanted to hug the female store clerk, but I held myself back. I didn’t want to be seen as some weird girl who gets emotional over getting another girl’s phone number.

“I’m surprised though, with how pretty you are, I really didn’t expect this was actually your first phone.”

“I thought for sure you’d be recovering your information from an older phone.”

“Where I come from we don’t really have smartphones.”

“Really? Are you from the country?”

“No, but it is a rather remote area though.”

“Oh? Are you actually a rich girl who has run away from home and eloped with your boyfriend who your parents don’t approve of or something?”

“Hahaha, no way, no way. Nothing like that. Although the circumstances are rather unique.”

“Oh? Boyfriend troubles?”

“Well… I guess you could say it’s something like that.”

I was more referring to being from a different realm, but she’s right that I’m troubled over my relationship with master.

“Oh? Why don’t you tell this big sister of yours?”

“Big sister?”

“Oh sorry, I tend to forget boundaries sometimes when at work. I meant, why don’t you share these troubles of yours oh valued customer.”

“No need to be so formal, big sister is fine.”

“Really? Great, I hate all the formalities that come with the job.”

“Well, little sister, I’m all ears.”

As I’d never had a female confident before, this was a really new feeling to me. Even though I just met her, I somehow wanted to vent out a bit of the frustrations that had piled up in my heart recently.

I wasn’t sure how to word things because it was a taboo topic, but after organizing my thoughts I decided to just come clean.

“I’m in love with my master who’s a married man.”

“What?! Sorry I think I just heard something outrageous. Were you actually an author instead of an idol? Was that the title to a novel you’re writing?”

“No. My situation is exactly as I’ve said.”

“M-m-master?! Are teenagers really getting into that sort of forbidden relationship? How daring! Not only that, your master is married and cheating on his wife with you? A flower in one arm while hiding a rose at his back? Really?! Just dump that loser and find someone who will treat you right!”

Eh? Are we talking about the same thing?

“How about this, I’ll introduce you to a few good guys. Don’t worry, they’re all good guys and they will definitely not make you act out such strange master servant plays.”

“Wait, wait, wait! You’re mistaken! It’s not that type of master. I’m his disciple, not his slave.”

“Ah. Oh… Hahaha. You scared me just now.”

“I see, I see. So you ended up falling for him after he taught you self defence. How innocent and pure. It’s the typical unrequited love towards one’s teacher who happens to be married. You’ve got it tough.”

“Tell me about it. Even when I forced myself on him he ran away.”

“…”