Can’t Come Back - Chapter 5

“I had a cup of tea with Rayleigh, who was packing yesterday. I also told her to take good care of you.”

“Really? I see.”

Dean only intended to have fun with the maid, Rayleigh, in the carriage. However, Dean pretended to be sorry to Berlia.

“Sorry I took your maid. I am indebted to you. She is well-known to be very good at serving, so she will help me on the long-distance journey.”

He had a sad expression on his face, but his feelings of regret were not felt as much as dust.

“If I can be of any help, that’s a relief.”

‘You’re going to take her because she’s well-known to be very good at serving? That’s not even funny.’

Berlia already knew everything about her husband’s affair. Among the many maids, it was too obvious to take Rayleigh along.

After eating and getting ready, Dean and his men stood in front of the carriage in front of the mansion. Rayleigh spoke to Berlia before getting into the carriage, with an apologetic look,

“Madam, Betty will serve you while I am away. See you again in about three months. I’m sorry for the inconvenience that the maid who will serve you has changed.”

Rayleigh’s red hair, as she bowed her head in apology, had a hairpin with sparkling jewels Berlia had never seen before. A hairpin adorned with transparent diamonds was obviously a fairly expensive item. It was impossible to have it with the salary of a maid.

‘……is it the price for selling her body?’

Berlia thought so. But then another thought popped into her mind.

‘But, I am no different.’

She has no right to criticize Rayleigh. That’s what she thought.

Rayleigh was given an embellished hairpin with diamonds in exchange for having a secret relationship with Dean, but Berlia gave herself all up to Dean and gained fame and wealth as a Duchess.

Wasn’t she more greedy than Rayleigh? Wasn’t she wishing for more? She got wealth in exchange for giving her body to her husband, and what she gained was no different from Rayleigh.

As she looked at the back of the carriage leaving for Cairndale, Berlia thought bitterly.

***

The mansion of Hildayden was quieter than usual. Like that day a week ago, Berlia couldn’t sleep today. At this rate, she thought her eyes would stay open all night, so Berlia pulled the rope beside the bed and called for the maid.

“Betty, are you there?”

“Yes, Madam.”

“Can you bring me some wine?”

At Berlia’s words, Betty, who will be Berlia’s new maid from today, brought her a bottle of wine. Berlia poured the wine into a glass. The scent of alcohol reached the tip of her nose.

‘By now, what is happening inside the carriage?’

It would be great if I could just forget about it without caring about the Duke’s personal life, but I can’t help but pay attention to it because I am in an unstable position.

‘How did I come to be like this?’

There is no woman who dreams of a gloomy future after marriage. It was the same with Berlia.

‘If I had known it would be like this, would it have been better for me not to marry my husband……?’

“Huh……”

Berlia sighed.

From the day she first met Cain and gained her confidence, she had been admired by many men.

But many men thought of Berlia as just a beautiful accessory they wanted to have next to them.

Knowing that, Berlia put more importance on loyalty.

She thought that if beauty faded away, it would be over. Why didn’t she know when she was young? That she can be abandoned even if she is loyal.

Love and loyalty. Which one is better?

‘If I could turn back time, could I not marry the Duke?’

She asked herself. But the answer was that she had no choice but to marry him. If she had married a Baron, Viscount, or family in the same situation as hers, her family would not live as comfortably as it does now.

Tears welled up in her eyes as she felt so sorry for her situation.

She drank the wine she poured in the glass. A glistening dark red wine ran down Berlia’s throat. As she drank three glasses in a row, she felt a little dizzy.

“Whoo……”

Her face heated up from drunkenness. Since she wasn’t a heavy drinker, it was impossible for her to drink more.

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She got up staggering from the sofa and headed to bed. As she sat down on the bed and stared blankly at the wall, Berlia suddenly thought of Cain.

‘If, if I were to marry Cain……’

At least, if she had married the person she liked, she wouldn’t have regrets like this. But before Berlia married Dean, there were many noble ladies who coveted Dean’s side. When those young girls heard that Berlia was sitting next to the man who would become a Duke, they said that Berlia was lucky and blessed.

This is because most nobles married without love. Because they were using the means of marriage to gain mutual benefit.

In that sense, Dean was one of the best grooms. The affairs of noblemen were common. Even Berlia realized this. Nevertheless, the reason why she was still hurt was probably that Dean’s attitude, who seemed to give her all the stars at the start of the marriage, has changed a lot. Besides, more than anything else……

‘Cain……. Wouldn’t I be happy if I married him?’

It was because she was secretly in love with her husband’s brother Cain.

She is married to the older brother of the man she has a crush on, and she is living an unhappy marriage. How pitiful she is.

Every time she saw Cain, her heart pounded. But she couldn’t show her feelings in front of him. So during the three years living under the same roof, she could only see Cain’s back.

‘If he hugs me……’

Berlia grabbed her own breast with her hand. She closed her eyes and thought of Cain.

‘If you caress me with your lovely eyes……’

Berlia lay on the bed. Her other hand, which was not holding her breast, slowly moved downwards.

‘If you kiss me passionately……’

In her imagination, Cain was passionately kissing her.

Her hand went down. Putting her hand inside her underwear, she gently stroked her pussy. Without realizing it, she spat Cain’s name out.

“Cain……!”

A small moan escaped her mouth. With her eyes closed, she couldn’t stop imagining Cain coveting her. Her imaginary Cain caressed her nipples, rubbing her bare breasts.

Berlia stroked the tip of her breast with her fingers. She can only imagine, but she was really excited because it felt like Cain was touching her body like this.

“Ahhh……!”

It was then.

“……Berlia.”

Someone called her. This time was not her imagination. Her moving hand stopped. She opened her eyes, which had been carefully closed.

“……Cain?”

Cain was right in front of her. For an instant, her body stiffened. What is she doing now?

She groaned as she touched her breasts and pussy, and even called Cain’s name with excitement.

To show this to Cain, Berlia blushed in embarrassment. With a confused look, she put her arms behind her back and moved to the corner of the bed.

“Why are you here?”

Apart from being embarrassed, Berlia could not understand why Cain was here. This is Berlia’s room. And it was a place where Cain could not enter at will.

“……because I heard moaning while passing by.”

Berlia blushed again. It looked like the door was open. To discover her secret appearance like this, she did not know what to do. Every second felt like an hour. How can she get out of this embarrassing situation? She wanted Cain to go back and pretend he didn’t know.

But Cain seemed to have no intention of going back. She spoke to Cain, who continued to stare at her,

“……maybe you heard it wrong. It’s late, so……go back, Cain.”

She told him to go back as if nothing had happened. It would be uncomfortable the next time she met him, but she needed to resolve the situation like this. If she told him to go back like this, he would have no choice but to do so.

Rather than that, no matter how much he heard a moan, was it normal for him to come into his sister-in-law’s room and secretly watch her masturbate?

She was confused. And then, unbelievable words came out of Cain’s mouth.

“I don’t think I heard it wrong. Weren’t you excited, sister-in-law, no, Berlia?”

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“What……”

She couldn’t deny it. Because everything he said was true. Cain approached Berlia who was unable to answer, and whispered,

“Did you expect someone to stroke you like this?”

Cain stroked Berlia’s cheek and spoke with a seductive smile,

“How about this. During the three months without my brother, I will spend the night with you?”