Capturing My Demon King Costar - Chapter 178

It takes several tries but eventually, Tan Liansi notices his presence.

“What…,” she looks around at the expanse of whiteness surrounding her. “What are you doing here? how did I end up here?”

“Retrace your steps, try to remember the last thing that happened before you ended up here.”

Her brow furrows in concentration, and then her mouth falls open on a gasp. “Fuck! Modu, we were in Modu…that guy…what happened?”

“We killed him, me and Xin Hulei, it’s over.”

Something crosses her eyes, and then she lowers her head. “I guess I wasn’t much help,” her tone turns derisive, “not in the past, and not now.”

Yao Shen frowns. His grip on her shoulders grows tighter as he helps her stand up.

“Don’t say that. Xin Hulei might not have survived without you, and you helped me when him, Jincan and Heimao were unconscious for months…” Her only reaction as he speaks is a mild shrug. Her eyes are distant and far away.

Probably still stuck on the memories she was forced to relive.

“You saved yourself too.”

Tan Liansi turns to him with a confused look. “What?”

“In the middle of this all, why haven’t you stopped to think, that keeping yourself together was perhaps your biggest achievement.”

Unlike Xin Hulei, she never forgot anything. Her unresolved feelings with Mei Shuang remained that way forever — and she even got to learn that that from that resentment an entire cult dedicated to eradicating demons was born.

It’s no small miracle that she keeps standing.

“I…I guess that doesn’t feel like much of an accomplishment.”

Yao Shen looks her in the eyes. “It is.”

She lowers her head but nods, a gesture so small Yao Shen barely sees it.

Neither of them is very affectionate. Yao Shen needs Xin Hulei to work through his own mental barriers when it comes to physical affection, Tan Liansi probably does too, except she needs him for verbal affection as well.

Funny, how both of them found in the most stoic man in the world the conduit to their own emotions.

He cracks a smile, it only serves to confuse her.

“What are you laughing at?” She shoots him a suspicious look which only makes Yao Shen’s smile widen.

“Nothing.” He pats her on the back, and then he looks down and tries to kick the snow beneath his feet. Nothing happens.

“Let’s wake up.”

Tan Liansi looks back in the direction in which Mei Shuang left. “My dreams are the only place where I can still see her.” A thin wet film covers her eyes, but doesn’t spillover. “There have been others but,” she shrugs.” I can’t stop thinking about what could have been.”

Yao Shen hears an echo of Meng Po’s words, reminding him of the power of letting go.

He doesn’t know if he’s ready to follow that advice, but maybe it’s good enough to share.

“Your memories will always be here for you to revisit.” He avoids her eyes, looking off into the distance to try and collect his thoughts. “But the people who are here now, might not always.”

She frowns. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Yao Shen rubs the bridge of his nose. He really has no talent for this “mystical”, “poetic” talk. He should leave that to old ladies in the Underworld and go straight to the point:

“Ye Fang likes you.”

Tan Liansi doesn’t say anything, just keeps staring at him in confusion. Yao Shen sighs, this time louder.

This isn’t going well.

“Listen, I don’t know if you’ve noticed or not, and are just looking at me because you can’t believe I’d bring that up now, which now that I’m really thinking about it maybe wasn’t the best choice.” He stops talking abruptly.

He has completely lost sight of where he was going with this. “Anyway, just putting it out there, you should consider it…maybe. Because she definitely like likes, and you know, she’s cool…except the whole superstition thing, but I guess…”

Tan Liansi interrupts him. “I think I’d like to wake up now,” she says, the tops of her ears have taken on a distinctively red hue.

“Right, that’s probably for the best.”

—

When Yao Shen wakes up the first thing he sees are Xin Hulei’s dark human eyes, staring down at him.

“Hey,” he says, his voice rough from the disuse of sleep.

“Welcome back,” the corner of Xin Hulei’s mouth twitches. “Jincan and Heimao are here.”

Oh no, Yao Shen completely forgot about that.

He sits up on the sofa at the same time Tan Liansi does. She spares him a brief nod of acknowledgement, and then turns to Xin Hulei.

“How long was I out?”

“Not long,” Xin Hulei says, and then, changing the subject, adds, “Jincan has news.”

He seems to be in a hurry to share this with someone else.

“Is His Majesty the Emperor going to be a grandfather?” Yao Shen asks, pulling Xin Hulei down next to him and smirking at Jincan.

Jincan grimaces. “I don’t know what you’re trying to imply but it sounds gross.”

Judging by the pointed way in which he clears his throat, Heimao got exactly what Yao Shen meant, and doesn’t think it’s gross at all.

“Anyway, my news are that I’m going to be an idol,” Jincan says, beaming.

Tan Liansi shoots Xin Hulei a confused look. “What? How?”

“It seems that our manager “saw his potential” from all the online speculation, and got in touch with him,” the corner of his mouth twitches again. Yao Shen realises now that it wasn’t doing that in amusement, and it’s actually probably a nervous tic.

He’s really annoyed about this turn of events.

Yao Shen keeps his own satisfaction silent. For his part, he thinks it’s great. He can’t imagine anything better than Jincan doing his own thing, far away from Xin Hulei. It would probably do him some good to cut the cord for good, and go out into the world to learn how to be his own person.

Wisely, he doesn’t share any of this. Mumbling instead a very unconvincing, “oh no, what a bummer.”

Jincan’s triumphant smile doesn’t slip. “Well, I’ve signed a contract already. So I’m going to be an idol! And there’s nothing any of you can do to stop me.”

It’s unclear from his words if he wants to be stopped, but when no one says anything his shoulders deflate somewhat.

“Do you even know how to sing?” Tan Liansi asks.

He grins. “Maybe, who knows? But my manager said that doesn’t matter because I’m cute!”

“Wow, you must be really flattered,” Yao Shen says, not bothering to hide his sarcasm.

“I am,” he says, proudly. “I’m going to be a star, bigger than you even.” He points at Xin Hulei, grinning widely.

Xin Hulei just nods. “That won’t be hard to do, I’m going to retire after we wrap up filming this drama.”

His words silence all of them at once.

Yao Shen can literally feel his mind whirring to a stop. “What?”

Tan Liansi looks between the two of them and then gets up to her feet, dusting off the front of her clothes theatrically. “How about I take these two off your hands?” She says, grabbing hold of both Jincan and Heimao. “We’ll get off your hair, I’m sure there’s a lot you need to discuss.”

After the three of them leave, Yao Shen unclenches his jaw enough to ask, “What was that all about?”

Xin Hulei reaches towards him, and Yao Shen calms himself down enough to allow him to draw closer. This is not about him, whatever Xin Hulei’s reasons to come to this decision, they have nothing to do with him.

Yao Shen needs to stop taking everything as a rejection if he expects this relationship to go forward.

Xin Hulei rubs the pad of his thumb across Yao Shen’s knuckles, soothing him his gentle touch.

“I’ve been thinking about it ever since you allowed the demons back into Youdu.” He sprawls on the sofa, stretching out his long legs. “I’ve been an actor for such a long time, far longer than you can imagine. It helped me keep it together.” He pauses. “For a long time, the last thing I wanted to be was myself.”

Slowly, Yao Shen nods. He understands that part of it. Acting has always meant an escape for him as well. It’s the only way for a person to travel back in time, to explore the future, and experience life as someone completely different. A little bit like reincarnation, in its own, secular way.

Maybe it isn’t surprising that both him and Xin Hulei would have been drawn to acting as a career path — all things considered.

Xin Hulei places two fingers under Yao Shen’s chin and tips his head back gently. His eyes are just as dark and inscrutable, but they’re filled with tenderness too.

Being looked at like that makes Yao Shen’s heart race inside his chest.

“I think I’m ready to find out who I’m supposed to be.” His fingers drift from under Yao Shen’s chin to the side of his head, playing with his earlobe.. “I think you’ll like him.”