Chronicles of the Red Sovereign - Chapter 91

Kai and I just sat there, watching the sun sink further into the horizon. The atmosphere was awkward and the silence was deafening, and I couldn’t help but be anxious. It had been about five minutes since he arrived and told me he wanted to talk to me, but neither of us uttered a single word since then.

I was still a little confused at the realization that dawned into me a while ago, and since he arrived abruptly, I had no idea how to proceed with it.

-Maybe I should initiate it? I mean, I was the one who walked away.

I took a deep breath and steeled myself.

-You can do this Nyxtriel. Just threat it like a battle strategy. Go for the shot!

The self-talk didn’t really help.

“”Hey, I-“” we uttered at the same time but I stopped immediately once I noticed it, but he did so as well.

“Uhm… you first.” I offered.

“No, you first. I mean, ladies first.”

I pursed my lips together and nodded. “First off, I want to apologize for what happened the previous night. I was impulsive and my outburst was out of place.”

“Why did you react that way?” he asked.

-That’s what you’re asking? To the point already?

I felt a little strange talking to Kai. Somehow, I noticed he wasn’t being his usual self. The Kai I knew was a little bashful, even amongst his friends. Being upfront was not one of his strengths. But I dismissed it anyway. I was given the chance to confront him so I took it.

“I apologize for prying into your private life. I guess I got used to you confiding all your worries to me and when you’re suddenly being so secretive with the archduchess I kind of… well… I sort of got a little …”

“…Jealous?”

“I wouldn’t say I got jealous, it’s more like I got a little mad that you’re not telling me anything and – yeah, I got jealous. So… what I’m trying to say is… I… I-“

“I like you Luna.”

I sat there frozen upon hearing his words.

-What did he just say?

“I like you. I have liked you for a long time in fact. But I-“

“I like you too.” I blurted out.

I couldn’t help it anymore. I mean, he did say he liked me so what’s wrong with telling him what I felt as well. I was happy on the inside that he liked me as well.

“You… do?” he questioned with a confused look. “So the archduchess was right.”

-Aunt Zaira told him? But I never told Aunt Zaira about it.

“Yes, I-I-I like you, too.” I said. “And it took some time and stuff for me to realize that. I mean, such a feeling was foreign to me and I misinterpreted it. But after… you could say, after being enlightened, by, by someone, I realized that.”

I couldn’t believe I was stuttering at my words. I was the confident top student of the Imperial Academy and the former god of was of the Celestial Realm but I was stuttering in front of a mortal boy.

“I see… so you also feel the same.” he said with a smile, although I couldn’t help but notice that his smile was rather sad and pained. “Luna, I also apologize for hurting you last night. What I said was a little overboard and I knew you were only worried about me, but I said that anyway.”

“It’s fine. I mean, you do have your own privacy.”

“Luna, I also apologize for what I’m about to say.”

I swallowed the nonexistent lump on my throat. I somehow had a bad feeling about it.

“It’s nice to know that we both feel the same for each other, but I’m afraid I can’t accept your feelings yet. And I hope mine wouldn’t stop you for what you plan to do in the future.”

-What?

“What? What are you-“

“Right now, I have something important to do, and I’m afraid our feelings for each other will hinder our plans for the future.”

-What is he saying?

I was very confused, no, beyond confused, if there was such a term. We both liked each other but he couldn’t accept my feelings and he wanted me to not accept his either?

“What are you trying to say?”

“I’m trying to say, with what’s going on, our feelings will only get in the way.” he cleared his throat but I kept looking at him with a confused look.

“What do you mean it will only get in the way?” I asked. “And what situation? Is it the G.A. Games? Is it your problem with your father? I don’t care about that.”

“It’s not that. It’s something even more… crazy and more dangerous. I mean, I’m pretty sure you have some plans and I do too.”

I was taken aback. I wanted to tell him that he was part of the future I planned but I stopped myself because I knew deep down, that despite living a happy life in the mortal realm in the identity of Luna Hysi, I still wanted to get back at those responsible of killing my clan. Not to mention I also wanted to avenge the real Luna who also lost her entire family and clan in the hands of demons and a traitor of the Celestial King’s court.

I couldn’t get myself to drag him, or any of those I recognize as someone precious to me, into a bloody road just for my goals.

I still did not get what Kai was trying to say about the current situation though. I mean, the world was relatively peaceful.

-Maybe that’s the reason he’s been so distant lately?

“If… if we still feel the same once this is all over, then maybe, we can try again.”

I couldn’t help but scoff. Somehow, I knew there was something he wasn’t telling me, but I didn’t try to pry. He was keeping it for a reason. Although, I knew I was supposed to be hurt at his words as well as the turn of events but seeing Kai say those words with a bright red face somehow dissipated that anguish.

-As expected, I do have a soft spot for him. I can’t even be angry at him for long.

“If that’s how it is very well then.” I replied with a smile. “Once we have achieved our goals, and our feelings for each other are still the same then why not. But the future is not set in stone, therefore it is uncertain, so let’s deal with it when the time comes.”

Kai smiled in which I reciprocated, but somehow I could still feel a little stab in my heart. I couldn’t get myself to cry though.

“Still, I can’t believe I got rejected at my very first confession.” I said and laid down the ground, watching the darkening sky. “At least that’s out of the way now. Hey Kai, are you really not going to tell me what’s wrong with you right now? You’ve been acting strange since that incident two months ago.”

Kai became awfully silent and it seemed suspicious, but he regained his composure and offered a smile once again.

“I can’t tell you, I promised someone I wouldn’t tell anyone.” he paused and sighed. “You don’t have to worry about it though. I’ll deal with it and then we can all hangout like usual again.”

“That should be nice.”

All of a sudden, memories of what happened in the arena popped up in my head.

“Crap, I still have to talk and apologize to Freya and the others.” I said and looked at Kai.

“Go. A team is not a team if there’s unrest and disagreement among members.”

“Thanks Kai. I’ll see you later.”

*****

A/N:

Hmm… It’s safe to say I’m not that good at describing romantic stuff. Ehehehe.