Crazy Duke and Fallen Queen - Chapter 284

Alexander leans me on the bed. He tucks the covers and asks Kate to take care of me while he finishes some tasks.

Before moving away, he closes the curtains of the canopy.

Kate is sitting next to me, cuddling the little ball that is crying her soul out. I’m so relieved, actually.

«Here,» I ask, stretching my arms out. «I’ll feed her.»

I untie the ribbon of the nightgown and move the cloth aside to free one breast. My daughter finds it immediately, even with her eyes closed.

Her hands are gripping me, and she starts sucking a moment after finding the nipple.

Thank the gods, she is hungry.

The first minute or so, my nipple is sore and hurts. It soon passes, but then my belly begins to clench and release.

«Kate,» I whisper. «I feel weird… My belly…»

She presses a hand on my stomach and feels the muscles.

«It’s normal.»

«This too?»

«Yes!» She nods. «It helps you heal from childbirth. And it will be like this for a couple of days.»

The little ball sucks unbothered, falling asleep after a minute or two.

«Kate,» I call my maid for the second time. «I think she’s done.»

«No!» Kate exclaims in a whisper.

She pinches the little ball’s butt, and she wakes up ready to cry. However, when she senses my bosom, she returns to her meal.

«Look at her,» I chuckle.

I turn silent when the door is opened, and the noise of some people carrying heavy things reaches my ears.

I look at my daughter’s calm face and relax.

She’s so light and small. Still ugly, yet I can’t help but find her cute.

Kate also looks at her with shining eyes and a tender smile.

«Have you decided a name?» she whispers, curious.

Oh, that’s right. I can’t continue to call her little ball.

«Not yet,» I pout. Alexander will name her when he finds some time.

«Everything is here, your highness,» a servant says from the other side of the curtains.

«Excellent. You can go,» Alexander replies, walking in the room like a nervous cat in a cage.

Kate slips out of bed and waves me goodbye before following the rest of the servants out. The heavy curtains that were blocking the vision are tossed aside, and my husband’s face appears.

«Everything all right?» he inquires, observing the sleeping baby. «If you’re done, we should let her rest. I’ve made the servants bring anything we need in here. You don’t have any reason to walk further than this room, now.»

«All right,» I sigh. «I’m tired…»

«Let me,» he starts, taking the little girl from my arms. «I’ll be right back.»

«Have you thought of a name?»

He stops midstep and turns to me. His face is pale and confused.

«Not yet,» he voices. «And you?»

I remember one of the dreams with a little Princess Lyland. Everyone struggled so much just to find her a name. Alexander didn’t know how to call her, so he didn’t want to see her. But then, he was forced.

It was a cute scene, even though my husband felt awkward and confused.

Thinking of a name is too much for him, apparently. But I won’t let our daughter stay nameless for a week. I will press him until he comes up with an idea. It doesn’t have to be a regal or pretty name. Just anything can do!

«What do you think about it?» Alexander queries.

«What?»

«I’m asking you for your opinion, Thea.»

«Why?»

«I don’t have any idea. How do you think we should name our daughter?»

«It’s your right to name her, Alexander!»

«But I’m asking you to do so!»

What? He’s just shifting the responsibility to me! This irresponsible husband!

«What about Lavinia?» I ask.

«Lavinia?»

It’s the name of the Princess’s mother and Alexander’s stepmother. From all the scenes I’ve dreamt of, I can understand that he loved her very much. And she also took care of him like a real mother would.

They were a family, for real.

I don’t know much about Alexander’s birth mother, but maybe it was better to propose her name instead. But I can’t remember it.

Lavinia, on the other side, is a whole person in my mind. I know her how I know the young Princess or the nanny, or Elias.

«It’s nice,» Alexander sighs. «A pretty name, indeed.»

«Do you think the Princess will be upset, though?» I haven’t thought about it.

«No. Why should she?» Alexander murmurs while bringing the baby to the cradle and making her rest down.

«It’s her mother’s name,» I point out. «Maybe, we should ask her before deciding…»

«She will assume I chose it,» he comforts me, lying by my side. «Now that Lavinia has a name, we can think about the rest tomorrow. I’m tired.»

«You just came back from travel,» I remember. «Come here…»

I move to the side, instead of staying at the centre of the huge bed.

«Where are you fleeing, now?» Alexander complains. «Come back here, now!»

«I’m tired, and everything hurts, Alexander,» I point out. He’s not thinking of beginning to work to get Elias already? Not to mention that I’m horrible to look at.

«We’re going to sleep, Thea. What were you thinking right now? I’m not a beast,» he chuckles, but his eyes show me a hint of annoyance.

Oh, well. He’s right. I was a bit quick to think badly of him…

I crawl back to him and settle in his arms.

I also peck his lips to make him forget about it.

«I’ve missed you,» I say, running my palms on his chest. «But you kept your word and came back early… I’m so happy that you’re here.»

«Why are you flattering me, now?»

«Because I feel like it.»

«Have you received my letter?»

«Yes,» I murmur while my cheeks flush. Will it happen every time he writes to me? It’s just a bunch of words written in code. What am I so happy about?

«And have you written a reply?»

«No, not yet. I was too busy reading and reading again,» I confess. «I couldn’t think of words that could match yours…»

«No?»

«But I finished planning the celebrations,» I remember. Oh, I’m looking forward to that. «But now I’m not in the condition to fulfil my promise. Will you be angry because of this?»

«Uh? No, Thea. You just gave birth to my daughter. How could I be angry at you for anything?»

«Alexander… I’m not sure I want other children,» I confess. It’s better to make it clear immediately. «All of this hurt me so much.»

His arm pauses on the middle of my back, but he doesn’t even frown.

«I will beg you until you change your mind,» he sighs. «I will spend the next year asking you every day until you’re so tired of hearing my voice.»

«What if I don’t find the courage?»

«Then, I will live with it.»

«Won’t you… force me?»

«No, Thea. I would never. And it wouldn’t work.»

«But what if we have another child, but it isn’t Elias?»

«We can’t have control over something like this. We can just pray that our dreams are fulfilled.»

«But after everything you’ve done, it would just be odd if you surrendered just because I say no.»

«Your words are a bit troubling, Thea.»

«I’m trying to understand.»

«I’m slow, you know? I can’t find the right solution on the spot; I can’t understand a problem the first time I toggle it. But with time, I start to realise. It took me years, but now I think I get it. I was sent back by some compassionate gods for some reason. If my task isn’t in opposition to having our son back, then I’ll see him again. But if I don’t, it will be my fault.»

Strangely, he isn’t desperate while saying this.

«I should stop longing for a past that won’t return, right?» he chuckles. «I have a family now.»

I start sobbing all of a sudden.

«Hey,» he whispers, pulling me closer. «I love you, Thea. I loved you for so long that I don’t remember how it felt not to know you. I won’t sacrifice you and my daughter for a dream. Elias was a miracle the first time. Lavinia is a miracle right now. If we deserve it, we’ll have our little prince back.»

«But you’re still settled on repeating all the things we did the first time, right?» I murmur in between a tear and the following.

«Just in case,» he says. Just that.

Then, he reaches out for the small lantern at our side and tunes it down without letting the flame die.

«We’ll have to sleep with some light from now on,» he explains. «In case Vinnie wakes up in the middle of the night.»

«Already with a nickname?»

«She’s too little for a real name. At least for us,» he continues.

«Vinnie,» I repeat. It sounds strange. But I can get used to it.

And Alexander loves nicknames. He would find one for almost any name longer than six letters.

I should have considered this before choosing the name.

«It sounds royal,» I comment, giggling in the shadows.

«You chose it,» Alexander replies. «How could it not be?»