Damn Reincarnation - Chapter 547: Divine Ascension (8)
Trigger Warning: This chapter contains thoughts of suicide and acting on that impulse due to physical disability (basically Hamel’s death).
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Eugene was filled with a variety of emotions.
He had seen Vermouth in his present state more than once, but this was the first time Eugene had come face-to-face with the true Vermouth.
Their meeting had come far too late.
Or at least, that was what Eugene thought.
Eugene felt that he should have already gotten the chance to face this bastard, Vermouth Lionheart, at least once before now, someway or somehow. As long as it was just once, no matter how short their meeting might be, they could have at least gotten the chance to talk. No, even if they weren’t able to talk to each other, as long as Eugene could see Vermouth in person and not as an illusion or in someone else’s memories, it would have been fine.
“Hey,” Eugene called out as he stepped into the void.
This was a world in which no life could be supported. It was different from the dimensional rift that Raizakia had fallen into or the one that Eugene had got sucked into during his battle with the specter. This place actively rejected all living beings. The only thing that could exist here was the void that was left by Destruction.
But while all that might be the case, Vermouth was still here. Eugene had also managed to reach this place, even if it was only in the form of his consciousness. Eugene didn’t bother to understand how this could be. He already had a vague idea of what was going on, and also….
Eugene didn’t want this joyful reunion that had been delayed for three hundred years be disturbed by such frivolous thoughts.
“Hey,” Eugene called out to Vermouth once more.
Each time he took a step forward, Eugene could feel his consciousness wavering. He had finally managed to reach this place, but it wasn’t easy getting to the center where Vermouth was waiting.
It felt just like when he had first seen the Demon King of Destruction. Just the way that Demon King had been able to elicit feelings of despair and insanity by merely looking at it, just standing in this place was enough to bring up feelings of madness and despair.
However, Eugene was able to suppress those feelings. After all, this wasn’t his first time coming here. Back in the distant past, before the time when Eugene was Eugene, and even before he was Hamel, Agaroth, the God of War, had been here once before.
He had ordered his Divine Army to charge to their deaths, and after witnessing their total demise, Agaroth himself had also gone to face his own death.
Then he had died here.
“Are you still alive?” Eugene asked.
Eugene was sure he knew what this place was. Agaroth had died here, inside the stomach of the Demon King of Destruction. Right in the core of Destruction.
Eugene paid close attention to where Vermouth was sitting. His chair was placed in the center of a wound that had been carved into the void. In the distant past, Agaroth had left this slash here, and Vermouth was sitting in the center of that slash with his head bowed.
“Or have you died already?” Eugene taunted.
The closer he got, the more difficult it was to speak. Each step he took also grew heavier. Eugene couldn’t even tell whether the words he had barely managed to eke out through gritted teeth were even reaching Vermouth.
Yet even so, Eugene felt that he had to say something. Right now, it didn’t really matter whether Vermouth was listening or if he could even respond.
“You son of a bitch,” Eugene cursed.
If at all possible, Eugene had wanted to have a good talk with Vermouth, but if Vermouth wasn’t in a state where he could coherently communicate, then it couldn’t be helped. Because in that case, there was only one thing that Eugene needed to do.
He let loose a flood of curses, “You fucking bastard! Do you know how fucking hard it was and how much shit I had to go through because of you? Argh, just thinking about it pisses me off all over again. You son of a bitch! If you had just said something sooner, then you wouldn’t even have been left in this state, you know that?”
Vermouth had obviously been enacting some grand plan. However, this bastard hadn’t bothered to relay any of that plan to anyone and had kept it a secret until the very end. Before starting their climb through Babel, if Vermouth had at least given Hamel some kind of hint, things wouldn’t have turned out the way that they did.
Eugene growled, “You bitch, at that time, you could have just told me not to do anything strange and just stick to the rear, keeping safe and quiet, no matter what. So why didn’t you, huh? You should have said that there was no point in me committing suicide! You should have just—! Just told me to stay quiet! You should have said that I just needed to follow you! That everything would be fine if we managed to climb up to the top together! That’s all you needed to do!”
The more he thought about it and the more he talked, the angrier Eugene became.
Unable to hold in his fury any longer, Eugene’s voice gradually rose to a loud roar, “If only you had done that! I also wouldn’t have committed suicide like an idiot—”
“Do you really think that would be the case?” A low, cracked, and hoarse voice was suddenly heard speaking.
Eugene abruptly stopped shouting. In his chair wrapped up in chains, Vermouth, whose head and shoulders had been hanging limply, could be seen slowly raising his head.
“Hamel,” Vermouth whispered as his closed eyes crept open.
He stared at Eugene with cloudy and dull golden eyes. Eugene’s breath stopped as he felt this gaze focus on him.
In Eugene’s, or rather Hamel’s, memory, Vermouth’s eyes had never been cloudy or dull like they were now. Because of that, Eugene could tell, just from the look of Vermouth’s eyes alone, how much of a terrible and agonizing torture the past three hundred years were for Vermouth as he spent those years sitting here.
Vermouth weakly began, “If I, at that time, had given you a hint, Hamel, would you truly have—”
“No.” Eugene simply shook his head. “At that point, I probably wouldn’t have listened no matter what you said.”
Eugene had gone on such a tirade after losing his temper, but in fact, even he knew quite well that if Vermouth had said something before they started climbing Babel, something like telling Hamel not to overdo it in the tower… or that Hamel absolutely needed to survive until they managed to reach Incarceration’s palace…. If Hamel had heard such words back then….
Hamel would have, at least slightly, pretended to listen and obey. Then, he would have tried to work out his own reason as to why Vermouth would say such things.
Telling him not to overdo it? Hamel had regularly been told such things by his comrades. Telling Hamel that he must survive until they reached the palace of Incarceration? That was understandable; after all, it was true that all five of them had only been able to make it this far because each of them had given their all.
“But in the end, I would still have ended up dying on the way there,” Eugene admitted.
No matter what Vermouth said, the results wouldn’t have changed. At that time, Hamel was already dying. With his body in such a terrible state, it would have been impossible for him to climb any further up Babel on his own. So Hamel hadn’t wanted to become a hindrance to his comrades. Even if everyone else said that it was okay, Hamel didn’t want things to play out that way.
That was why Hamel had committed suicide.
“See now,” Vermouth whispered. Then his dry, cracked, and pale lips drew a faint curve as he smiled. “At that time, no matter what I would have said… you wouldn’t have listened.”
Eugene shook his head. “No, if that was the case then, bastard, you should have just taken physical action instead of relying on words. At that time, my body was in such a crippled state that I wouldn’t have been able to put up any resistance, so if you had just forcefully dragged me with you….”
“Just think about it, Hamel,” Vermouth said as he slowly shook his head. “At that time… I… I thought that everything was nearly over and that the culmination of all our efforts was just around the corner. It truly was only just a little bit further. Just the tiniest bit more. We had already slain the Shield of Incarceration, and we had just defeated the Staff of Incarceration. The only one left was the Blade of Incarceration.”
Eugene held his retort.
Vermouth continued, “The Blade of Incarceration might be strong, but he is also a straightforward swordsman. For a group like ours, he would have been much less difficult to deal with than the Staff of Incarceration, who had hurled all sorts of traps and curses at us.”
Unable to say anything to this, Eugene just quietly kept his mouth shut as he listened to Vermouth.
Vermouth kept up the same faint smile as he confessed to Eugene, “I thought I was being thorough in all of my preparations, but at that moment, I relaxed just the slightest bit. After all, we really didn’t have all that long to go. The thought that we only needed to take just a few more steps led me to drop my guard.”
Eugene awkwardly muttered, “Ah… well….”
“When the curse left behind by the Staff of Incarceration in his final act of desperation shot towards me, I… my reaction to it was a little slow,” Vermouth admitted. “However, I still had enough time to either dodge or defend myself.”
Eugene knew Vermouth was telling the truth.
“It was at that moment that you made your move, Hamel,” Vermouth sighed.
Eugene coughed guiltily, “Ahem….”
“I had been paying close attention to your movements ever since we managed to reach Babel. I knew that you were gradually getting closer to death. I also knew that you intended for the battle against the Staff of Incarceration to be your last one when you used Ignition that one final time. Despite that, or perhaps even more so, I didn’t pay any attention to you at that moment. Because I had already judged that you were no longer capable of movement,” Vermouth easily admitted his mistake.
Eugene coughed once more, “Ahem….”
“At that moment, I could never have imagined that… in the state you were in, you would actually move to shield me. Three hundred years ago, that was the second mistake I made,” Vermouth said as he closed his eyes.
Eugene didn’t have a reply to this and could only purse his lips.
Vermouth’s words were, for the most part, correct. During their battle against Belial, the Staff of Incarceration, Hamel’s body had lost all of its fighting capability. He had been left in a state where he couldn’t even move without some support. However, Hamel had still forced himself to move. When Belial’s curse had been fired at Vermouth, his body, which should no longer have been able to move on its own, still sprang into action.
Vermouth wouldn’t have died from that curse. He probably wouldn’t even have gotten injured. Since this was Vermouth, he would have been able to respond in some way or other in that short time.
But Hamel, who was saddled with this crippled body from then on, would be forced to stare at everyone’s backs as they went on without him. He could only watch as Vermouth, Molon, Sienna, and Anise fought Gavid Lindman and finally defeated the Demon King of Incarceration.
Furthermore, this was Babel, the Demon King’s Castle. This wasn’t a place for a cripple who couldn’t even move his own body. Even if he just stayed quietly in the rear, having the burden of a cripple around would just be a hindrance to everyone. But Hamel’s comrades would never abandon him. No matter how fierce the battle might become, they would always pay attention to the rear so that Hamel wouldn’t get caught up in the fight.
Hamel definitely couldn’t bear the thought of such a future. He didn’t want to have his crippled body dragged along only to serve as a hindrance to everyone.
Eventually, Eugene couldn’t help but let out a long sigh before saying, “Well… I’m sorry. You probably already know this, Vermouth. But back then, when I threw myself in front of you, it wasn’t in an attempt to save you. It was simply because I… I wanted to die. And I decided to die in a way that meant I would get the foolish self-satisfaction of “saving” you.”
“Hamel,” Vermouth replied as his eyes opened once more. “That isn’t something that you need to apologize to me for. I never gave you an explanation for what was going on. In that ignorant state, you made a choice to end your life when you found that you could no longer fight, and when you leaped into action, I am sure that you simply wanted to save me. That is just the type of person that you were and are. I was the one who was just caught off guard and slow to react. It’s all because I didn’t manage to keep focused until the very end.”
“That’s true,” Eugene agreed, nodding his head as if he’d just been waiting for Vermouth to say these words.
Vermouth blinked a few times in surprise at this shameless response. After a few moments, Vermouth let out a dry chuckle as he nodded his head.
“You… it seems that you haven’t changed at all,” Vermouth observed fondly. “No, I may have been mistaken. Instead, it seems like you’ve become even more shameless than you were three hundred years ago.”
“If you want to survive being reincarnated as a one-year-old child[1] with an adult mind while hanging around a bunch of snot-nosed brats, then, of course, you have to learn to be shameless,” Eugene excused himself.
Vermouth let out another laugh, “Haha, when I arranged your reincarnation, I was worried that you might not be able to endure all of the many inconveniences, and it would drive you to go on a rampage.”
“Just what exactly do you see me as?” Eugene sneered. “In a fit of passion, I may have committed suicide in my final moments, but I was usually a calm and collected person. Even if three hundred years had passed and I was reincarnated as your descendant with all of my past life memories intact… I guessed that there had to be a reason for it.”
He could still vividly picture that moment. After dying as Hamel, he had woken up with a loud cry of “wah.” When he was born, his mouth had just kept wailing all on its own, and he had no control over his newborn infant’s body. Then he heard her voice.
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—It’s a healthy boy.
—His name will be….
—Eugene.
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The voice of his mother who had just given birth to him.
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—Eugene Lionheart.
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He definitely would never be able to forget the feelings that had surged within him after hearing his new name. His life as Hamel Dynas had ended, and his new life as Eugene Lionheart had begun.
“There were times when I felt that I couldn’t bear it any longer,” Eugene admitted.
After quickly learning to walk and how to voice his thoughts clearly, he had learned of how the Great Vermouth had made an Oath with the Demon King of Incarceration that had ended the war, even though there were still two Demon Kings left alive in this world. He learned that the Devildom had become the Helmuth Empire, that Vermouth and Anise had died, and that Sienna and Molon had gone into seclusion.
At that time, he had sobbed loudly until his voice grew hoarse. He also broke everything in his room in a fit of anger.
“Vermouth,” Eugene called out the Hero’s name in a calm voice. “I’ve thought about it over and over again. When I finally meet you, when I get the chance to talk to you, what exactly it is that I should be asking you.”
Vermouth waited in silence.
Eugene listed the question, “Why on earth did you make that Oath? What exactly is in the Oath? Why did you make sure I was reincarnated?”
“Hamel,” Vermouth called out to him.
Eugene ignored this call and continued speaking, “I now know the answer to all of that. You had no choice but to make that Oath. Regardless of whether or not it was possible for you to defeat the Demon King of Incarceration, the ending that you had envisioned absolutely required my survival.”
This time, Vermouth closed his eyes instead of responding.
Eugene shook his head, “I still don’t know the exact details of your Oath. All I can do is make a guess. This world should have been destroyed three hundred years ago, but because you made that Oath, the Destruction was postponed until now. The Demon King of Incarceration… agreed to halt the war, and together you managed to find a way to restrain the Demon King of Destruction.”
Vermouth silently acquiesced to these guesses.
Eugene sighed and said, “That just leaves the question of why you reincarnated me. But I know the answer to that as well. You knew from the very start that I was Agaroth’s reincarnation. That was why you recruited me as your comrade. However, after I died like an idiot, you had no choice but to somehow reincarnate me.”
“Hamel,” Vermouth finally spoke up. “Everything that you’ve said was correct. By now, you know most of the answers to all of the questions that you had.”
“That’s right.” Eugene nodded.
“However, there is one thing that you haven’t asked yet,” Vermouth pointed out. “One thing that you can only find the answer to by asking me right here and now while I’m right in front of you.”
Now, it was Eugene’s turn to fall silent.
“The question of who am I,” Vermouth said with a wry grin.
He buried himself deeper into the chair that was wrapped in chains while raising his hands. The shackles locked around his wrists clanged as Vermouth’s hands rose up to cross over his chest.
Vermouth continued, “You haven’t asked who exactly am I. Who exactly is Vermouth Lionheart? And if I’m really a human? But you should already know that I’m not exactly a human. However, you’re still unaware of what I truly am at my core—”
“I don’t need to know that,” Eugene suddenly spat out. “You are Vermouth Lionheart. That’s enough for me. The same goes for Molon and Anise. Moreover, even Sienna, who almost died after you opened a hole right through her chest, also thinks the same way.”
Vermouth’s lips were pressed tightly in emotion.
“That is enough for all of us. Since you are Vermouth, it’s only natural for us to still think of you as Vermouth,” Eugene insisted.
Vermouth tried to argue, “Hamel—”
Eugene just spoke over him, “However, no matter how much I think about it, don’t you think that you were being a little bit too harsh with your actions? Could it be that you have some kind of grudge against Sienna? Why did you have to poke a hole right through her chest, straight through to the other side? Because of that, Sienna almost — no, I shouldn’t say that. According to Sienna, you were in a very strange state when you attacked her. It seemed like someone else was in control of your body, not the real you.”
Squeeze.
Vermouth’s chest tightened as he bit down on his bottom lip.
Pretending not to see this, Eugene continued speaking, “Well, it’s not like I can’t completely relate to what you might have been feeling. Even today, it’s still sometimes true, but back then, three hundred years ago, there were a lot of times when I wanted to smack Sienna just once.”
That said, he had never thought of wanting to pierce a hole straight through her chest.
“And sometimes, when my anger reaches its boiling point, I also have memories of losing control of my temper and running wild…. Then there’s also the time when the Moonlight Sword went on a rampage, I was the one fighting, but it felt like there was someone else in control,” Eugene admitted.
“Hamel,” Vermouth said, letting out a sigh as he shook his head. “You should already know this by now, don’t you? Everything that you’ve just said is ultimately nothing more than a forceful attempt to turn your head away from the true problem.”
“So fucking what if I am,” Eugene said, furrowing his brow as he glared at Vermouth. “For all four of us, that’s all that we need. We don’t really need to hear from your lips just what kind of bastard you really are or what you were up to.”
“This isn’t a problem that you can solve just by ignoring it,” Vermouth chided.
Eugene angrily retorted, “In that case, I’ll just listen to your explanation later. Later… once everything is all over. After we’ve forced you to get up out of that shitty chair, then we, all of us together, will surround you and beat you to a pulp.”
Vermouth silently twitched.
“We’ll be sure to listen to your explanation then,” Eugene said with a huff.
Vermouth closed his lips and stayed silent for a few moments. He could tell that Eugene’s words were sincere. No matter what he said right now, Hamel wouldn’t listen to him.
“You all haven’t changed a bit,” Vermouth finally said. “I, with you… with Sienna, Anise, and Molon… if I had wanted to, I might have been able to tell you something about who I was, about what was in the Oath, and what had been prepared.”
“That seems to be the case.” Eugene nodded.
“However, I couldn’t say anything because even my continued silence was included as part of the Oath,” Vermouth revealed. “That’s still the case even now. Hamel, even if you ask me about my true identity… I won’t be able to answer. I’m not allowed to respond to such questions. Only the Demon King of Incarceration can tell you the true story.”
“Why did you make an Oath like that with that bastard?” Eugene complained.
Vermouth shook his head. “The Demon King of Incarceration has seen both the beginning and the end of the world’s fate many times over and has imprisoned countless people in his chains. To someone like him, these three hundred years of postponed Destruction are an anomaly that should not rightly exist, and he just wants to be able to observe the whole process.”
“But that bastard, Incarceration, has been secretly interfering with all sorts of matters,” Eugene accused.
“In the end, he just wants to see the outcome of our challenge against fate or whether it’s even possible. That is the reason he decided to make that Oath with me,” Vermouth said with a chuckle and shook his head. “Because that miserable and weary demon has been wrapped up in countless ties of cause and effect, he has a love-hate relationship with fate.
“He desperately wishes to somehow change his fate and find a true end, but he has resigned himself to the impossibility of that. At the same time, he believes that a person’s will can change their fate. He loves it when someone manages to free themselves from their fate, despite not being able to do so himself, or perhaps that’s even more reason for why he feels that way.”
Eugene silently processed this.
“That’s why the Demon King of Incarceration sealed my lips. After Destruction was postponed for the next three hundred years, I kept my silence, Sienna focused on her magic, Molon founded his own kingdom, and Anise chose to face her own death. All of that has created the flow of events that has led us to reach this moment. If I hadn’t kept my silence, if I had told everyone who I am and what they should be preparing for,” Vermouth paused as he looked straight at Eugene and whispered, “Would you really be where you are now?
“Is there any point in guessing whether or not you, who knew the full truth in advance and were fully prepared for it, might be better than who you are now? You have experienced much, gained much, and finally reached this point,” Vermouth asked.
Cliclink.
Vermouth’s shackle-clad hands fell down from his chest.
As he draped his arms over the chair’s armrests, Vermouth continued speaking, “The nature of my existence, the Oath, and the mission that I was charged with three hundred years ago — all of that will be revealed by the Demon King of Incarceration when you reach his palace in Babel. After you know the full truth, what you decide to do then will be the final test given to you by the Demon King.”
“Heh,” Eugene let out a snort as he shook his head. “That bastard really is one sick pervert.”
Though, he felt like he should have expected that from the moment he first saw the Demon King walking around wrapped in chains.
1. An interesting fact about Korean and other Asian cultures is that age is counted differently from Western cultures. Children are born as one-year-olds and turn two on their first birthday. ☜