Dominating Desires Private Chapters - Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

When I opened the door he was sitting at his desk squinting at the computer, obviously frustrated. His eyes turned to meet mine and they were emotionless before he turned back to the screen.

I deserved that.

I shut the door and turned back around to face him, his head was turned to mine, and his eyes stared at me curiously, but there was still no other emotion there. We sat there staring at each other, none of us moving.

I felt so guilty, but at the same time I meant what I said. It was a mistake to do what we did, over and over again. When Riley finds out it’s not going to be good. It’s not if he finds out, it’s when.

God, and all I could think about right now was last night when I was bent over that desk, the dirty thought had me getting wet, and I wanted to jump his sexy self.

I heard his voice and that brought me out of my head, but looking at him, it didn’t make the thoughts go away. I shook my head trying to clear them, or at least put it out of my current thoughts.

“Sorry what did you say?” I asked him

“What do you need Brylee?” he asked again slower

“I brought you coffee” I gave him a small smile, but his face remained blank and I hated myself even more. I walked over and his eyes followed my every movement until I got to his desk and set it down.

“Okay” he turned back to the computer and I stood there trying to figure out what to say, what to do to make this all better. We always had a love hate relationship, but it was never really quiet. There were always comments made, he’s never been like this with me.

“Why are you still here Brylee?” He never called me Brylee, unless he was being serious, and then when we have sex.

“I think we need to talk” I said softly.

“There is nothing to talk about and we both have work to do.”

“Chase, we need to talk about-”

“About what Brylee?” He yelled and threw his hands up in frustration making me jump slightly “We need to talk about what? If you wanted to talk we could have talked last night, but no. You ran away and then told me it was all a mistake. So no, we don’t need to talk. There’s nothing to talk about” he finished and I looked down.

He was right, I ran. I could have talked to him, but I freaked out and said some not so nice things. I was a coward, and I deserve this.

“I’m sorry.” I whispered

“Yeah, well I’m not. Because as much as I was this horrible mistake, I would never think of you like that”

“I’m sorry. I don’t regret saying that. It was a mistake” it hurt me to say it as much as it was hurting him to hear it.

“A mistake is happening once, not three damn time’s Brylee! Three times in two weeks.” I kept my eyes down and bit my lip. He was right.

“Your right, I shouldn’t have let it happen.”

“Are you saying you didn’t want sleep with me?” he sounded so hurt and I figured honestly was best.

“No.”

“Then why did you? If I was that bad, why did we have sex over and over and over again that night, why did we the next morning, why did we last night?” he was trying to keep his voice down.

“I meant I wasn’t saying I didn’t want to. I did.” I mumbled

“What?” he asked “Look at me Brylee! Why won’t you look at me when you’re talking?” I knew that I was walking on thin ice now; he was closing to going off. So I raised my eyes to meet his.

“I said that I meant no, I wasn’t saying that. I wanted to sleep with you Chase, and we both know that” he just stared at me, looking in my eyes trying to figure out if I’m lying.

“How can I believe that if you say it was a mistake?”

“It was a mistake, it shouldn’t have happened. We all work together, and it’s obviously affecting the business. And you’ve been my brother’s best friend since forever. It’s not right, and everything can go wrong and it is”

“Because you keep doing this!” he ran his hands through his hair, and I wanted to do just that right now. Part of the reason I couldn’t look at him. He’s sexy as hell when he’s angry, and if memory serves me right, oh so amazing things comes when he acts on those emotions.

The memory of being tossed on the dining room table and him pounding in and out of me, using my body for his pleasure went through my mind. How rough he was and how amazing it felt.

It was taking everything in me to keep from asking him to punish me and take me on the desk, against the wall, his chair, the floor. I don’t care where I just want him to.

“Brylee!” he yelled and I shook my head again and looked at him.

“I’m just trying to make things right. We can’t do this. I just want things to be alright, it’s affecting my relationship with my brother and our work.” He just wasn’t understanding that.

“It’s only an issue because you keep making it one.”

“I’m not making it an issue! How can you not understand this is a bad idea?” I ran one the hand that was not still behind my back through my hair.

“Because if you just gave in we wouldn’t be fighting”

“We always fight, that’s not going to change” I reminded him. Chases and I couldn’t go more than a few hours without fighting. It’s always been that way.

“Why do you keep fighting me Lee? Why is it that you can be so open with me when were in bed”

“I don’t recall it being in bed most the time” it just slipped out and I saw a small smile on his face, I bit my lip because this was a slightly awkward moment.

“Don’t do that. And anyways, you’re open with me and you’re feisty as hell but then as soon as it’s over you let me hold you, and then you push me away. Why?”

“Because we can’t Chase. It’s not right”

“God Lee, it’s just sex. What’s so wrong with sex” I looked away from him.

I took a deep breath and looked up at him “I need to get back to work”

“And you pull away from me again” and now he was just frustrating me. We were obviously not going to see eye to eye, and then he just tell me it’s sex. And then wonders why I don’t want to risk my relationship with my brother, the company, and their relationship?

“I’m sorry that I can’t be your fuck buddy, Chase. It’s just sex after all so go find someone else” I glared at him and his eyes widened. “I left early to get you this” I set the muffin on his desk, his eyes went to it and then to my eyes.

They looked softer, he didn’t look angry anymore, he looked upset and guilty.

“Lee” he started but I cut him off.

“Anything else you need Mr. Rodriquez?” I asked in the best professional voice I could.

“Brylee, I didn’t”

“No? Well if you need any help just let me know.” I told him and turned to walk towards the door.

“Brylee, wait” I stopped but didn’t turn around.

“Yes, Mr. Rodriquez?” I asked

“Lee, don’t call”

“My name is Brylee or Ms. Acosta.” I corrected him. I didn’t want him to call me that. Because to me, it wasn’t just sex.

He said nothing so I continued walking out the door. I can’t believe he would risk his relationship with my brother for just sex; does he not value it at all?

I’ve known Chase forever, and I know how he works. He doesn’t have feelings for people unless it’s family or friends, he doesn’t do the relationship thing, it’s all about sex for him.

And I let myself be his next bed buddy.

I felt disgusted and ashamed of myself. It’s been so long since the last time I had sex, and I told myself I would never have sex with a guy I wasn’t dating. I didn’t want to sleep around, and I threw that all away for Chase. I felt like such a slut for it too.

Worst part is thinking that it actually meant something more to him. What the hell is wrong with me?

I went back to my office and my brother came in

“Make up yet?” he asked me and I looked down and just shook my head. “Why are you guys fighting?” he asked, I just wanted him to go away.

“I don’t know. Ask him” I said harshly and glared at him. He held his hands up in surrender and backed out of my office and back into his. Well at least he’s gone.

But at the same time I just wanted to call him back and have him hug me and tell me it’s going to be okay and that we can hire someone to kill him.

So I did what any girl would do, I called my best friend.

“Roro, I need my bestie right now. Will you come stay with me tonight?” I asked as soon as she answered, not even giving her time to say hello.

“Ryry what’s wrong?” she asked

“I’ll tell you if you come stay with me tonight, please.” I begged, and she seemed to pick up on the desperation in my voice.

“Alright. I’ll be there after work. Love you”

“Love you too, you really are the best” and I meant that. So I just had to get through the day and then Rochelle can make it all better, she’s good at doing that. She’s great with advice and hopefully she can help me out of the mess I got myself into, well after she makes me tell her every detail.