Don’t Pretend to be Poor with Me - Chapter 14

Why are there scars on your ear

Making him crossdress, either he dies, or the rest of the class dies.

Regardless, don’t even think about it.

Song Yan turned his head to look at Xia Zhiye.

Xia Zhiye: “?”

Song Yan: “.”

Xia Zhiye: “……”

Fine.

A certain someone must get what they want.

Xia Zhiye lazily tilted his head, then supported it with his hand: “Look at my pure white skin, my pitch-black hair, then look at my bright red lips, don’t you think I’m quite suitable for playing a female role?”

Audience: “……”

Kong Xiaoxiao felt a headache coming on: “Xia Zhiye, get a grip. You’re too tall, who would act as the male lead for you? Also, we definitely can’t get a wedding dress for the final scene that’s your size, wouldn’t it be pointless.”

Xia Zhiye tilted his head, then looked at Song Yan, looking quite aggrieved: “They don’t want me.”

Song Yan: “……”

Who the fuck cares.

The little fatty seized the opportunity to encourage: “Yan ge, only you can take on this heavy responsibility. Just take it as sacrificing your life for the greater good. Anyways it’s just a man playing as a woman, other than the final scene with the butterfly wedding dress, you’ll pretty much just be wearing men’s clothes, it’s no big deal1.”

“That’s right, that’s right. We’re begging you, Yan ge. If we don’t think of any other way, we’re going to be reduced to the grade’s laughing stock again.”

“It’s true, I don’t want to be kicked off the stage by the principal again.”

“Also, isn’t the prize enticing? Isn’t eating barbecue enticing? Getting the prize money and eating barbecue isn’t enticing?”

“Yan ge, don’t worry. As long as you agree, from now on you’ll be my second father. As long as anyone provokes you, I’ll destroy them.”

Song Yan couldn’t quite understand why this group of people were so passionate about such an idiotic matter, but the strange thing is, under the earnest and burning hopeful gazes of these idiots, he unexpectedly did not know how to reject them.

And as everyone knows, hesitation is a sign of defeat.

So in that short moment he was silent, Ruan Tian slapped the board while profiting from Song Yan’s misfortune: “Great! Since classmate Song Yan didn’t decline, then let’s do it like that! Let’s thank classmate Song Yan for his sacrifice! Everyone prepare for math class now!”

After saying this, she clacked away on her high heels as if to avoid being arrested for her crimes.

The other students also immediately stood up to applaud: “Let’s all thank classmate Song Yan for rising to the occasion to provide this grand contribution to our country! Everyone stand up, and warmly applaud!”

They stood up uniformly, their applause like thunder, rising to the clouds, as if vowing to give Song Yan no chance to back out of his role.

Luo Wei, who had walked into the classroom was shocked into stumbling: “Did Beijing’s bid for the Olympics succeed?”

Song Yan: “……”

Why did he have to come to this school.

The little fatty thought that after making such a fuss, the jianghu2 of Class 1 ought to see some bloodshed.

At the very least, Xia Zhiye should have been killed twice.

However, other than putting on a sour expression all day, the big boss Song who had been sitting behind him actually did not do anything else.

Xia Zhiye seemed to not find this unexpected, and had even accepted the role of Liang Shanbo calmly.

Song Yan was annoyed: “Are you that idle?”

Xia Zhiye was very reasonable: “They all can’t match your good looks.”

Song Yan rewarded him with a cold phrase: “Fuck off.”

“But who is going to play Ma Wencai?” Xia Zhiye asked Kong Xiaoxiao.

Kong Xiaoxiao did not hesitate: “Liu Yue.”

“?”

37 pairs of eyes looked over with distrust.

Kong Xiaoxiao was exasperated: “This is what Tian mei assigned. Wasn’t Liu Yue absent from school for a week because he was sick? Tian mei said he knows he’s wrong, and reformed himself. So she wants us to pay more attention at this time, and give him a chance and not isolate him.”

The little fatty sighed: “Although I understand what Tian mei means, but under this kind of situation, making Yan ge and Liu Yue wear wedding attire together, it really is like a strong man locking up a boy3.”

“It’s fine. We can let him be a little green4. Anyways, the script is in our hands, we can take control of it.” School committee member Zhao Ruiwen stretched out his middle finger to push up his glasses, “See how I can change something rotten into magic.”

“……”

Why does it feel unreliable.

Zhao Ruiwen was totally unaware of this lack of confidence, and continued to ask: “Then who will act as Zhu Yingtai’s mother? They have quite a bit of scenes as they’re the main actor of all the jokes, they can’t be randomly chosen.”

Kong Xiaoxiao: “How about Fang Chang.”

Zhao Ruiwen: “That’s fine.”

Song Yan, who had been completing worksheets on the side, raised his head to ask the little fatty: “Who’s Fang Chang?”

Little fatty: “If I say it’s me, would you believe it.”

Song Yan: “……Sorry.”

You also can’t blame him, from the start of school to now, it was as if no one had ever called little fatty’s real name. Also Song Yan was the type to perfectly implement ‘it’s none of my business, none of your business,’ so not knowing the other’s name was perfectly normal.

But the little fatty was a bit hurt, after all, he thought he was the person closest to Song Yan after Xia Zhiye.

Then Song Yan asked again: “How come they all don’t call you by your real name?”

Xia Zhiye responded sociably: “Because there’s an idiom, called ‘we’ll cross that bridge when we get there.’”

“……” Song Yan, “Sorry.”

The little fatty was attacked for the second time, and quietly shed tears.

There was one good outcome from being forced to participate and act in the stage play, which was that one could brazenly and openly skip evening self-study.

It was decided that rehearsal was every night at 8:30pm.

In the middle, Song Yan had some free time to go pick up a package, then walked to the arts floor, and pushed open the door to the practice room.

“The entire army is attacking — —”

“One versus three, or else you can’t win.”

“Hurry up, the flowers I’ve been waiting for have already withered~”

“Oh my God, buy it buy it buy it!”

“……”

Sure enough, all living things on earth have their own reasons.

The low graduation rate isn’t simply due to feng shui5.

Even the school committee member was entirely calm, correcting the script while playing on his phone: “There’s still two or three weeks left until the Art Festival. If we practice now, we’ll forget by the time we have to perform, so we might as well play first for a few days.”

The few girls in the dance troupe also gathered their heads in a circle: “That’s right, staying in the classroom is too stuffy.”

Song Yan wasn’t some goody two shoes student and evening self study really was too boring, but he felt that this wasn’t any much better.

He turned and prepared to leave.

Xia Zhiye, who had been laying on the exercise mat playing Fight the Landlord6, lazily turned over: “Give it up, at this time you won’t be able to leave school.”

“……”

What kind of dumb rules did this school have.

Song Yan pulled up his backpack, then expressionlessly walked next to Xia Zhiye.

Xia Zhiye naturally moved over towards the inside, making space for Song Yan to sit down.

Then one sat with one pair of legs spread on the outside, and another sat laying down with a pair of bent legs. Each playing on their own cell phones, appearing quite harmonious.

Xia Zhiye originally planned to take advantage of this free time to take that dumb, rich lady up the rankings, but the other wasn’t online. But this wasn’t an issue, and he continued to fight the landlord.

But while fighting, he found that the teammate who matched with him played so poorly it raised one’s hackles. After losing his beans7, he felt that it wasn’t interesting to play any longer, and began to bother Song Yan.

At one point he’d play around with the belt on Song Yan’s clothes, then he’d pat around the other’s waist, then he’d study and rub the back of the other’s head.

Song Yan was annoyed to death by him, then directly turned around to kick him: “If you don’t want this hand anymore just tell me, I brought a knife with me.”

Xia Zhiye and Song Yan were friends for a while now, and had already transcended the point of life and death, and without any fluctuation, said: “I just found out that your ears are pierced.”

When he said this, Song Yan subconsciously rubbed his ears, then lowered his hands: “None of your business.”

Then turned his back to the other.

Xia Zhiye gazed at Song Yan’s ears from the back, and found the shape of his ears to be very delicate.

Also perhaps it was because the other’s skin was too white, his outer ear appeared very thin and looked nearly transparent under the light, as if surrounded in a halo of luster, like extremely high quality jade.

His earlobes were also very, very small, with an extremely small piercing on it, as if it were a cinnabar mole, strangely charming.

Xia Zhiye was touchy, and fearlessly rubbed it.

His thumb and index finger lightly pinched the earlobe, and found it to be unexpectedly soft.

It was hard to believe a person with such a hard temper could have such a soft body part.

Xia Zhiye couldn’t bear to part with such a feeling on his fingertips, and kept pinching it for a while.

In the next second, Song Yan easily grabbed the other’s wrist, then twisted it backwards in an attempt to violently beat the other.

Xia Zhiye: “It hurts.”

The low voice was mixed with a hint of patience and a shudder that was difficult to detect.

Song Yan stopped at once, loosened his hand, tore open Xia Zhiye’s collar to take a look, then after confirming no blood at his shoulder, lowered his eyes and sat back down at his original spot: “If you have nothing to do, don’t move about foolishly.”

It was unclear if he was saying not to bother with him, or not to bother the other’s injured shoulder.

Actually Xia Zhiye wasn’t hurt, but boys, especially mature and earnest boys, must take advantage of whatever they could to win their desk mate’s care, and relied on his injury to commit a violent crime of becoming favored and arrogant: “How exactly did you get that ear piercing?”

Probably because he felt guilty for hurting Xia Zhiye, this time, Song Yan didn’t say ‘none of your business,’ and instead replied without thinking too much: “When I was younger, I had poor health, and the aunty who raised me said boys would be easier to raise if they get their ears pierced and be raised as a girl, so she pierced my ears.”

Normally, ‘piercing one’s ears to better raise you’ was usually said by one’s parents or grandparents.

Regardless, it shouldn’t have been said by a nanny.

Added to the fact that when Song Yan said this, he carelessly revealed a bit of loneliness, and Xia Zhiye suddenly thought, it couldn’t be that Song Yan, this little friend, didn’t have anyone who loved him dearly as a child.

Otherwise he wouldn’t have received such a name.

But he was thinking too much.

Meanwhile, Zhao Ruiwen had already surreptitiously walked over with the script: “That, Yan ge……”

Song Yan raised his eyes, and Zhao Ruiwen felt a deathly attack on the spot.

Xia Zhiye comforted him: “It’s fine, say what you want to say. He can’t beat you to death.”

“Oh, right, that’s nothing.” Zhao Ruiwen also didn’t think too much about what was strange with the other’s words, then set his heart upon asking, “Yan ge really has his ears pierced?”

Song Yan was nearly annoyed to death: “What about it, do I have to tell the entire world that I got my ears pierced?”

Zhao Ruiwen hurriedly explained: “That’s not what I mean, it’s just that if you really have your ears pierced, then I’ll add my favorite dialogue from that part in the HuangMei opera8.”

Xia Zhiye: “Which part?”

Zha Ruiwen: “Just that part, ‘If Yingtai is not a woman, then why are there scars on your ears.’9”

Xia Zhiye pondered this for a moment, then nodded: “That’s fine.”

Song Yan was extremely polite: “If you want to add it, then add it.”

If you don’t add it, then go away.

Zhao Ruiwen understood what was unsaid, then obediently returned to his corner, and began to crazily add emotional nuances to the play.

The girls of the dance troupe had already surrounded the same cell phone, and excitedly clamored about, and their noises shook the room.

Zhao Ruiwen couldn’t hold back, and asked: “What exactly are you excited about all day long.”

Kong Xiaoxiao raised her head, her face full of self-control: “Nothing much, just exploring the changes and possibilities of the reproduction of human beings in the future.”

With this, even Song Yan and Xia Zhiye raised their heads.

Why was this female classmate, who just yesterday had been crying painfully because she couldn’t understand Mendel’s pea hybridization experiments10, was already spouting such profound and strange biology terms.

Zhao Ruiwen’s face was vigilant: “Are you guys studying behind my back?”

Kong Xiaoxiao’s face didn’t change: “Nope. But if you want to find out more, I can also share some reference materials with you.”

After she said this, a notification bell could be heard.

Xia Zhiye and Zhao Ruiwen each received a lush, shared link.

The school committee member was filled with the proactive excitement of raising his Biology scores, and happily opened the link, then waited for the link to load.

[The Overbearing Prince’s Subordinate Male Wife]

[It’s Too Late for the Scum Gongs to Regret Me]

[After Transmigrating into the Milky Shou, I became Loved by Everyone]

[Getting Marked by the School Bully Will Lead to Pregnancy]

[He Runs, He Chases, They Will Never Escape]

……

Wait.

The school bully is a boy?

And the cool class grass the school bully is dating is also a boy?

He understands everything else, but how can a boy give birth?

Zhao Ruiwen felt that the scientific worldview he had studied hard everyday to learn through nine years of compulsory education, may need to be rebuilt after temporary collapse.

1. Some background on the Butterfly Lovers. In the time period of the legend, women weren’t allowed to pursue scholarly pursuits. However, Zhu Yingtai convinces her father to allow her to attend classes while disguised as a man. While studying, she meets Liang Shanbo, and falls in love with him. However LSB remains clueless as to the fact that ZYT is a girl, despite her many hints. Finally, she shows him her pierced ears (a characteristic that was thought to be exclusive to women only at that time) to prove that she is a girl. Finally LSB falls madly in love with ZYT, but ZYT’s father has set up an arranged marriage for her, to a wealthy merchant, Ma Wencai. Hearing this, LSB is heartbroken, and his health gradually deteriorates until he dies in office. On the day of ZYT’s marriage, the wedding procession is stopped due to strong winds, and the procession coincidentally stops at LSB’s grave. ZYT leaves the procession to pay respects at his grave, and cries in despair, begging for the grave to open up. With a clap of thunder, the grave opens up and ZYT throws herself in the grave to join LSB. Their spirits emerge in the form of a pair of butterflies and fly away together.

Anyways, most of the story is spent with ZYT dressed as a man (as she’s studying with LSB), hence why little fatty says this.

2. Jianghu, in modern times, generally means a circle of interest. In this case, the circle of interest is Class 1.

3. A meme that originated from a gay adult video. It generally means creating a CP.

4. In this case, making (LY) green means giving him a green hat, which essentially means having him be cheated on.

5. SY means that the low graduation rate is because these students love wasting time/playing around. It isn’t simply because of fengshui aka natural reasons.

6. Fight the Landlord is a poker-like card game.

7. Beans are an in-game currency for Tencent QQ games, one of which includes Fight the Landlord.

8. HuangMei opera is a type of opera style from Anhui. ZRW wants to add a specific line from the HuangMei opera adaptation of the Butterfly Lovers.’

9. These lines are actual lines from the HuangMei opera.

10. Gregor Mendel was a biologist and largely considered the father of modern genetics. His experiments on pea plants forms the basis of Mendelian inheritance, a type of biological inheritance.

i’m kong xiaoxiao lol.

also if you decide to read any notes in this ch, please read note1! it’s v impt to understanding the dialogue of the story!