Don’t Pretend to be Poor with Me - Chapter 23

Couple’s Bracelet, May You Live a Long and Happy Life Together

In such a large-scale social suicide scene of being caught in the act while speaking badly about someone, the usual solution would be that the person who gossiped about others should take the initiative to apologize, explain, and coax the other person.

But Song Yan’s temper was so bad for so many years, and his ability for self-reflection was nothing to brag about. In this kind of situation, the first thing he thought of was that the Moments Xia Zhiye posted yesterday night seemed to be at this hotel.

So why would Xia Zhiye be at a hotel? Could it be that he came to see his jiejie again?

Thinking this, Song Yan raised his eyes, both his expression and tone of voice filled with a cold inquisition: “Why are you here?”

Xia Zhiye who originally wanted an explanation raised his eyebrows slightly.

This little one came back to NanWu secretly and even came to a hotel with someone else, and was even caught in the midst of starting a rumor, but instead of obediently admitting he was wrong, self confidently interrogated someone else?

Seems he really was unbridled.

Xia Zhiye squinted his eyes slightly and stared at Song Yan, as if he were threatening the other.

But Song Yan kept his eyes raised as before, his face full of confidence and righteousness.

Xia Zhiye threatened the other for three seconds, but after achieving nothing, laughed lightly instead: “Forget it.”

Song Yan was still cold: “Forget what?”

Xia Zhiye lazily replied: “Nothing, I just forgot something at the front desk, and came to pick it up today.”

“What about that jiejie of yours?”

“Taken away by her boyfriend.”

“……”

Turns out he was even fooling around with a taken woman.

At this point, Song Yan completely had no intentions of apologizing.

Playboy, scumbag, very annoying, these four words were unequivocally and distinctly, the truth.

Meanwhile Shen Jiayan felt apologetic in his heart, stood behind the two while poking his fingers together: “Um, this, that, just……”

Wanting to apologize but not knowing where to start, and also seeing Song Yan’s attitude with no intention of apologizing to the other, for a moment, he was a bit at a loss.

Fortunately, it seems Xia Zhiye finally saw him: “Who’s this?”

“Oh, hello, my name is Shen Jiayan, Xiao Yan’s childhood sweetheart.” Shen Jiayan eagerly took two steps forward, pulling Song Yan’s arm.

The boy wasn’t tall, and he was milky white. His facial features were delicate, with a head of curly hair, and his puppy eyes blinked and blinked.

Not one bit as cute as Song Yan’s sour face.

Xia Zhiye’s lowered eyes stared at Song Yan’s arm being pulled for three seconds, and got an answer with his ass as crooked as the Pacific Ocean1.

“Childhood friends?”

He asked a rhetorical question.

Shen Jiayan muttered: “Or is it……wooden horse wooden horse2? Anyway it just means we grew up wearing the same pants, sleeping in the same bed, that kind of relationship.”

Turns out classmate Song Daxi who always repels people a thousand miles away would sleep in the same bed with other boys.

And looking at him now, it seems he even planned on sleeping in the same bed tonight.

He even said no one likes him. It seems some people only know to act cute when they’re drunk.

Xia Zhiye glanced at the luggage in Song Yan’s hand, and asked: “You’re not going back tonight?”

Song Yan indifferently replied: “Mm.”

As the mediator for Song Yan, who treated his words as gold to the point where he always needed a good beating, Shen Jiayan promptly explained: “I’m not too familiar with NanWu, so I wanted Xiao Yan to take me around.”

Xia Zhiye nodded to showcase his understanding, then retorted: “But he also isn’t familiar.”

Shen Jiayan: “?”

“Everyday he’s at school, and has no time to go out. If you guys need, I can be a guide for you.”

Xia Zhiye’s voice was very nice to listen to, and was very charming when he laughed. He didn’t get angry despite hearing them talk badly about him, and even took the initiative to offer help, he was simply good-looking and kind.

Shen Jiayan’s favorable impression gradually rose, and just as he wanted to say ‘Sure, sure’, he was attacked by Song Yan’s cold glare, so just as he was on the verge of saying what was on his mind, he switched to cautiously asking: “Xiao Yan, what do you think?”

Xiao Yan didn’t want to think.

He picked up his luggage, and without looking back, walked forward to the front desk.

Shen Jiayan felt since Song Yan didn’t like Xia Zhiye, then it wasn’t good to force the other, and could only drop the subject.

Just as he prepared to compliantly follow along, when he passed by Xia Zhiye, he heard three words as light as a feather float over his head: “Little milk strawberry?”

It was as if Shen Jiayan was struck by lightning, and he immediately stood blankly on the spot.

Three seconds later, he stiffly raised his head, his face frightened: “You, how do you know? Don’t tell me you were eavesdropping on Xiao Yan?”

“……”

Although Xia Zhiye’s own brain circuits were already quite unusual, he also couldn’t keep up with Shen Jiayan’s ability to jump to conclusions.

Xia Zhiye originally wanted to make up some lie, but one could tell from this little classmate’s expression that with his IQ, he would believe everything Xia Zhiye said, so feeling bad, he only calmly reminded: “Yesterday night when playing, other than my friends, it was only Little Milk Strawberry.”

Shen Jiayan: “……”

Only then did he realize he just spoke a pile of nonsense.

“But don’t worry, I’ll keep it a secret for you.” Xia Zhiye laughed extremely kindly.

Shen Jiayan was skeptical: “Really?”

“Of course. I believe in the characters of Song Yan’s friends, and also respect each person’s unique hobbies or even their unspoken hardships. So if you’re unwilling to say it, I’ll help you keep it a secret, don’t worry.” Xia Zhiye’s voice was low and warm, while his expression was serious and sincere.

In Shen Jiayan’s ears, each word seemed to have come straight from the bottom of the other’s heart, and Shen Jiayan was completely moved. In that moment, a warm heat rushed up from his heart to his eyes, and he was choked with emotion: “You’re such a good person.”

Xia Zhiye nodded: “Right, I also think that I’m such a good person. It’s just a shame……haah.”

Xia Zhiye lowered his head and sighed, his majestic and thick eyelashes drooped down. His light colored pupils concealed a hint of youthful sorrow.

Seeing this, Shen Jiayan’s heart tightened: “What’s a shame?”

“It’s a shame that Song Yan misunderstands me and doesn’t like me. He always feels I have a lot of girlfriends, am a scumbag, but I haven’t even dated once. I have no idea where he heard this rumor about me. I originally wanted to find an opportunity to explain it to him, but he isn’t willing to listen to me at all.”

Xia Zhiye’s voice was filled with a vague sense of helplessness and sadness.

Shen Jiayan felt simultaneously guilty, sympathetic and sad for a moment.

After all, he seemed to know where Song Yan got this misunderstanding towards Xia Zhiye.

If Xia Zhiye really wasn’t a playboy scumbag, then could it be that the materials he investigated were wrong?

Thinking this, Shen Jiayan raised his head to look at Xia Zhiye.

The other was indeed very tall, but still had a youth’s lanky slim body. He was both good looking and clean, had a good temper, was warm and considerate, and was even willing to keep a secret for him. How could this kind of person be a scumbag?

He himself definitely misunderstood Xia Zhiye in the past.

The person who started the rumor should end it, and he must be the one to carry the pot himself3.

Shen Jiayan vouched on the spot: “Don’t worry, leave this matter to me! If Xiao Yan doesn’t like you, then I won’t leave!”

Xia Zhiye laughed as if he was an old fox on the verge of stealing a chicken: “Then I’ll leave the hard work to you, classmate Xiao Shen.”

.

Shen Jiayan originally planned to harass the other, but after suggesting Xia Zhiye come along with them at night, Song Yan only coldly replied: “Whatever you want.”

Since when was Song Yan this easy to convince?

Shen Jiayan faintly felt something was wrong, but his intelligence was unable to discover what was wrong, so he chose to directly give up thinking about it, and happily tidied up his things and then left.

It was a rare night without rain, and the night market was flourishing along the river. The breeze along the river was gentle, the lights were dazzling, and the air was filled with the scent of hot pot seasoning.

Shen Jiayan felt it was all so fascinating.

He walked and walked, turned back, and found Xia Zhiye’s profile smiling down at Song Yan while saying something, while Song Yan only slapped the other’s hand just after it was placed on his shoulder with a cold face.

He slapped quite fiercely.

And it was also quite well-practiced.

Seems Xiao Yan really doesn’t quite like this roommate of his.

But Shen Jiayan felt this wasn’t good, after all, in a place far from home, meeting someone who could withstand Song Yan’s temper was indeed hard to find.

Also this handsome asshole called Xia Zhiye was not only dissimilar from the rumors saying he was a devil, but was even easy to deal with, very loyal, and yielded to Xiao Yan a lot. As if he were a very reliable person.

So in order to prevent Song Yan from having a lonely two years in NanWu, and to make up for his prior wrongs, Shen Jiayan felt easing the tension between Song Yan and Xia Zhiye required immediate attention.

Thinking this, Shen Jiayan called out: “Xiao Yan, they’re selling wishing bead strings4 here, we should each buy one for good luck.”

This so-called wishing bead string was just a normal beaded bracelet, then after choosing a specific bead, the handiwork master would carve a small character that could only be seen clearly with a magnifying glass on the inside of the bead, and it could be considered as making a wish.

The shop closely overlooked a Buddhist cave near the riverbank, and it was reportedly said that the beads have a hidden light. Several famous bloggers have recommended the shop when they came to visit, and the shop has since become a viral store.

The price changes with the overall trend, and generally cheats money from tourists and young students, as well as those whose IQ is lacking.

Song Yan had no interest.

But Shen Jiayan dragged him over and acted spoiled: “Aiyah, Xiao Yan, we already came, just buy one for each person, okay?”

Shen Jiayan was a person who was dumb but rich, and could really annoy others.  If he wanted something, he could pester you until your ear grew calloused.

Before, if he encountered such a situation, Song Yan was usually too lazy to care, and would directly pay for it, as if he were providing a charitable donation to an idiot.

But now Xia Zhiye is here.

A few hundred yuan for a string of beads was a casual matter for Song Yan and Shen Jiayan, but for Xia Zhiye, it might be a big burden.

If Song Yan or Shen Jiayan offered to pay for the other, with Xia Zhiye’s personality, he definitely wouldn’t accept it. If Xia Zhiye was the only one who didn’t buy it, then with Shen Jiayan’s idiotic ability to speak out of turn and ask, then it would be hard to avoid an embarrassing situation.

So Song Yan coldly said: “Not interested.”

After saying this, he was prepared to leave.

But Xia Zhiye hooked his arm over Song Yan’s shoulder, and lazily said to Shen Jiayan: “That string of light green beads next to you is more suitable for you.”

“Really?” Shen Jiayan happily walked over to try on the bracelet of green beads, “You’re right.”

The owner of the shop saw the three of them, and quickly determined the circumstances, then smiled while saying to Shen Jiayan: “This little classmate is cute, and suits this light-green color well. These two male students are more suited for this obsidian bracelet. Since there are only two left of this style, we have a discount of ‘buy one get one free’.”

Sellers who have such IQ in these kinds of places have some insight.

The light-green bracelet was fresh, clean and charming, and was suitable for Shen Jiayan.

The obsidian bracelet had no other superfluous decorations, only a dark blue moonstone in the center of one string of beads, while the other string had a light pink moonstone at its center. It was a bit softer in appearance, concise and neat, and the quality was also pretty good.

The most important thing was it was ‘buy one get one free’.

That way, if he bought a bracelet, he could give the other to Xia Zhiye, and he could satisfy Shen Jiayan’s wish and save himself from the other’s harassment. Furthermore, he could naturally prevent Xia Zhiye from paying, and could resolve all embarrassment.

So Song Yan directly asked: “How much.”

The shop owner replied: 688.”

Song Yan opened Alipay, scanned the QR code, and took the bracelets from the shop owner. Then with a cold face, he stuffed the bracelet with the light pink colored moonstone into Xia Zhiye’s hand.

Xia Zhiye’s eyebrows raised minutely, as if questioning the other.

Song Yan lowered his eyelid, and pulled the string of beads onto his wrist: “If we don’t buy a bracelet each, then that idiot would complain until tomorrow.”

Xia Zhiye thought buying the bracelet wasn’t the problem, after all, it wasn’t that expensive, and it was very normal to buy a good luck charm when coming out to play.

But why did the shop owner choose this specific style out of all the other styles?

Also, in terms of the level of pickiness of little master Song, he shouldn’t have been so perfunctory, nor should he have been so greedy for such a small bargain of ‘buy one get one free.’

Could it be……

Song Yan wanted to wear the same style of bracelet as himself?

After coming up with this idea, Xia Zhiye wordlessly laughed, and put on his own bracelet. Then he lightly grabbed Song Yan’s wrist, and their two arms intertwined under the moonlight: “Not bad, looks pretty good.”

The youth’s arm was lanky and his wrist bone was sharp. The black stone emitted a cold and stiff luster that contrasted against the other’s skin, making it appear even whiter. And even that pair of blue and pink moonstones appeared just right.

There was nothing else but to say, it was indeed good-looking to the point it was quite eye-catching.

It’s just that Shen Jiayan glanced at those two young men, then turned back to look at the sales counter as well as that placard with ‘Couple’s Bracelet, May You Live a Long and Happy Life Together5’ written above that style of bracelet. For a moment, he didn’t know if it was appropriate to say — what he wanted to recommend was actually that fraternal bracelet.

After hesitating for a short period, he decided it was best not to say it.

After all, his goal was to ease the tension in their relationship. Now they looked so harmonious together, then wasn’t it fine to live a long and happy life together?

Anyway, what was the difference between a couple’s bracelet and a fraternal bracelet?

Nothing.

As long as everyone liked it.

.

After buying the bracelets, Xia Zhiye and Song Yan had no wish to write, so the three of them planned to go eat.

Xia Zhiye brought them to an outdoor hotpot shop.

The hot pot shop was opened near the riverbank, the tables arranged in the courtyard, and the architecture was old but charming. All four corners of the shop had fake lanterns plugged in, and if one raised their head, one would be able to see the night sky. The breeze from the river was neither hurried nor slow, and set the mood nicely.

Shen Jiayan was very satisfied.

The three chose a spot near the river and sat down.

Xia Zhiye smoothly grabbed the menu and picked a few dishes that Song Yan liked to eat, then sent it over to the other two: “What do you want to eat, I’ll treat you.”

Song Yan took the menu, and without raising his head: “AA6.”

“What? Our Yan ge wants to settle the accounts with his own brother?” Xia Zhiye’s right hand lightly tapped against the table. The beads on the bracelet let out a light sound, as if it were suggesting something.

Song Yan: “……”

Forget it.

Xia Zhiye was originally someone who wouldn’t take advantage of others. After taking the bracelet, he definitely wanted to treat them in return.

Also with Shen Jiayan here, he couldn’t directly say he was worried that Xia Zhiye had no money. So he could only let the other treat them to this meal, and think of a way to compensate him later.

Song Yan thought this, didn’t say anything else, and lowered his head to order dishes.

Shen Jiayan, who sat next to him, moved his head closer, and saw a platter of deep sea shrimp for 298 yuan, wanting to order it. But the back of his hand was roughly flicked by Song Yan’s fingers.

Shen Jiayan covered the back of his hand, and sucked in a breath of cold air, and was nearly aggrieved to death: “Xiao Yan, why did you hit me!”

Song Yan’s face didn’t change: “I’m allergic to seafood.”

Shen Jiayan: “?”

He knew Song Yan for over ten years, how come he never knew Song Yan was allergic to seafood? Also, didn’t Song Yan eat three large crabs at his house yesterday night, how come he didn’t see anything wrong with Song Yan then? How come he suddenly grew allergic?

While he stared dazedly, Song Yan had already quickly ordered a few vegetable dishes, as well as a few cheaper meat dishes. Then handed the menu back over to the server.

The server glanced over the menu: “Would you guys like to order any alcohol or drinks?”

Shen Jiayan finally recovered: “Yeah, a cup of……”

He hadn’t finished yet when he was interrupted by Song Yan: “No need, water’s fine.”

Once again, Shen Jiayan: “?”

Song Yan’s face didn’t change, and remained calm: “Shen Jiayan and I don’t drink carbonated drinks, and also don’t like drinking anything sweet.”

Hearing this, Xia Zhiye also didn’t think too much: “Sure, then let’s leave it at that for now. If it’s not enough, we can order more.”

The server turned and left.

Shen Jiayan who had treasured lazing around at home and drinking happy water7 all his life: “?”

What happened?8

When Song Yan ate at restaurants, didn’t he usually order from the most to least expensive dishes? But now he didn’t even order alcohol or, drinks, and is only drinking water from the tap? Is this still Song Yan? Was the world about to fall apart?

He seriously looked at Song Yan: “Yan er, is your family about to go bankrupt?”

Song Yan calmly looked at the other: “Is your head just there to hold brain soup?”

“……”

Fine, Song Yan was still the same Song Yan.

So where exactly did the problem arise？

Shen Jiayan, whose brain was always on the smoother side, thought and thought, but couldn’t figure it out.

Song Yan stared at the other’s distressed expression, and knew the other had encountered a burden of some kind of difficult problem, but also had no interest in clearing it up, and only stood up: “I’m going to the bathroom.”

Shen Jiayan forgot things quickly, and hearing Song Yan say this, also got up: “Then I’ll go get some condiments.”

The condiment station was placed near the kitchen, and was on the left-most side of the courtyard. The bathroom was on the right-most side of the courtyard. After passing by a man-made fake mountain, as well as a pavilion, the two parted ways.

After asking for directions two more times, Shen Jiayan finally reached his destination.

“The design of your courtyard is a bit complicated, it’s like a maze. But it really is pretty.” Shen Jiayan chose condiments while chattering with a nearby worker.

The worker smiled while replying: “Although it doesn’t look like much during the day, the main appeal is when the sky darkens, the lanterns are turned on, and the view is reflected off the water. That’s when it looks particularly beautiful.”

“That’s true.” Shen Jiayan nodded, and after staring at the dazzling lineup of condiments for a long while, didn’t know where to start, and asked, “Then do you have any recommendations for condiments?”

“Yes, we do.” The server handed him a small plate, “This style of pickled mountain peppers is handmade by our store……”

“Ah!!!”

The other hadn’t finished speaking when a ‘boom’ sounded, and in a split second, the entire riverbank was submerged in darkness. The entire world was immediately filled with the shrieks and shouts of fear and surprise.

Shen Jiayan was cowardly, and directly grabbed onto the arm of the worker, his voice raised into a dolphin-like shriek.

The worker who was originally not shocked by the power cut, was shocked by Shen Jiayan’s tight grasp: “Ow— It hurts, it hurts, little classmate be gentle.”

Shen Jiayan not only did not loosen his grip, but grasped the other even tighter, and asked with a shaky voice: “Haunted? Is this place haunted?”

“Don’t worry, it’s probably just a power outage. Recently the electrical circuits are getting older and the electrical load is getting heavier. Nowadays this happens at least once a week. In a few minutes it’ll be over.” The server had seen everything, and remained calm throughout.

At this point, Shen Jiayan finally sighed in relief: “That’s good, I was scared to death.”

The worker comforted him: “You’re considered lucky. You’d be unlucky if you were in the bathroom and the power suddenly went out.”

Shen Jiayan imagined it for a moment: “You’re right, ghost stories usually occur in the bath……”

Wait.

Bathroom?!

Fuck! Song Yan was supposed to be in the bathroom!

Once he thought of this, Shen Jiayan immediately grew less afraid, his voice wasn’t shaky any longer, and he grabbed the worker to ask: “Where’s the bathroom?”

The worker pointed in a direction: “Follow along the right side, it’s close by once you pass the fake mountain. But it’s actually a bit far, why don’t you wait until the electricity……”

“There’s no time to wait!”

Shen Jiayan hurriedly said this, then opened the flashlight on his phone, and hurriedly ran towards the bathroom while holding onto that small saucer of pickled vegetables.

As a child, Song Yan had a psychological shadow. He couldn’t be left alone in a pitch-black, confined room. In some serious cases, he could even go into paralysis and shock.

The more Shen Jiayan thought, the more anxious he became. What if something happened to Song Yan?

After circling around the entire courtyard, he found the bathroom. But after kicking open the door, he instead stood blankly at the door.

The scene he imagined of Song Yan curled up in a corner alone, trembling and in need of a warm and strong hug did not appear at all.

Because Song Yan was already hugged by another person.

Song Yan, who had always rejected close contact with others, especially during his claustrophobic episodes, at this very moment, was leaning into Xia Zhiye’s embrace.

His forehead was pressed against Xia Zhiye’s shoulder, both hands tightly grasping the clothes around Xia Zhiye’s waist, his body bent over, and his slim shoulder blades undulated particularly violently due to the deep breaths he had been taking.

One of Xia Zhiye’s hands embraced the other’s waist, while the other lightly patted the other’s back.

The similar bracelets on their hands glistened under the light of Shen Jiayan’s cell phone flashlight, yet neither turned to look at him.

It was as if an invisible boundary that belonged only to the two of them enveloped them. Others couldn’t see it, touch it, or even enter it.

The scene was almost too harmonious.

To the extent where Shen Jiayan, who stood at the door, one hand holding his phone to give them light, the other holding a small saucer with nowhere to place it, suddenly felt as if he was a pickled fish9.

.

The author has something to say:

Xiao Shen: I, Shen Jiayan, am sour, a vegetable, and superfluous10.

XiaoXia: I, Xia Zhiye, my wife bought a couple’s bracelet for me, he definitely really loves me.

Xiao Song: I, Song Yan, taking an idiot and a poor fool out to play is so tiring.

1. Ass as crooked as the pacific ocean is the literal translation of 屁股歪到太平洋, which generally refers to one being biased/prejudiced. It is often used to describe a fan who likes a rare-pair (a CP that is not commonly liked). Essentially saying XZY thinks SY and SJY are a rare-pair.

2. Childhood sweethearts = 青梅竹马, lit. green plums wooden horse, wherein green plums = a girl, wooden horse = a boy to make a pair of childhood sweethearts. So SJY is saying wooden horse-wooden horse to mean a boy-boy couple.

3. Carrying the pot means being the scapegoat, admitting his wrong doings/mistakes

4. Bracelets that have their origin in prayer beads. Usually have no meaning, and is worn for aesthetic, but some could be attached to good luck/wishes.

5. Author uses an idiom here that is usually said to married couples.

6. AA is splitting the bill 50/50.

7. ‘Happy water’ is a slang term for coca-cola – a play on the Chinese name for cola.

8. Originally written in English.

9. A term generally used to refer to someone who is jealous, incompetent, and superfluous. The three characters of pickled fish = 酸菜鱼, when separated, 酸 (suan, lit. sour) = means to be jealous, 菜 (cai, lit. vegetable) = to be incompetent/weak/stupid, and 鱼 (yu, lit. fish) is a homophone for 余 (yu) = superfluous/a third-wheel.

10. See note 9. Author splits up the three words of ‘pickled vegetable’ here.