Dungeon Item Shop - Chapter 349

The cauldron bubbles as Fresh stands downstairs, fiddling around on the workbench. The vapors of the hot-bath creep through the door to the washroom and rise up against the ceiling of the basement, before wafting and drifting outwards as they crawl up the staircase.

It is early in the morning of the next day. Very early in the morning. The others are still asleep, but Fresh had woken up and decided that she wanted to get to work right away.

Sure, there might not be many customers right now, but that doesn’t mean that there isn’t stuff for her to do. The house needs to be fixed up and she wants to make some new items. Something cheap, long-lasting, but also useful.

As such, the idea is in and of itself, extremely simple.

Fresh takes one of her heating beads, the kind that can regenerate their magical energy. Grabbing a few strips of treated leather, she lays them out flat onto the table. They need to be water-tight.

Hmm…

“Ah!” Fresh realizes, grabbing her small jar of liquefied crystal-drakonium. It’s really a great recipe that Shamrock had come up with. It turns out that slime goo is the key ingredient to stop it from resolidifying quickly. But if it’s heated, then it turns hard again. It makes it perfect for applications like this.

Fresh takes a small brush and coats the two small sheets of leather with them on one side each. Then, holding her hands above the strips of material, she uses her tailoring abilities to sew them together, into a small pouch with one open end.

The little bag which is about the size of her own palm flops back down to the table. She picks it up and looks it over, satisfied.

Smiling to herself, she holds it open and flips it upside down, holding it over a lit candle so that the heat can come inside to dry out the crystal-drakonium smear.

After a few minutes and one small burn later, Fresh goes to the mineral-pool and collects some of the world-tree mineral water in the pouch. Finally, she returns to her workbench and takes the self-heating bead, dropping it into the little bundle with a small splash.

Now all that’s left to do is seal it.

She smears some more crystal-drakonium goo on the inside lip of the opening and then sews it shut, holding it over the candle for a minute longer afterwards.

Fresh holds up the thing, smiling to herself as she feels it in her hands. Its squishy and soft, but it’s hot. It’s on the verge of being too hot, but it’s not quite there just yet. She presses it against her cheek, holding it there for a second.

What a nice item.

She lets out a long sigh, feeling its warmth enter herself.

The others will like these. They’re cheap to make and they’re more than useful now in the depths of winter. Plus with all the people having a hard time, if they can sell them cheaply, they’ll keep a lot of hands and feet warm. She’ll ask Muldrich if he wants this one. Maybe it will help him, since he has to stand outside all day?

Fresh nods to herself, blowing out the candle and heading upstairs. It’s about time for the others to wake up, so she should get started with breakfast.

It’s egg day today.

“It’s so squishy,” remarks Basil, poking the hot-water bag laying on the table a few times. She watches it jiggle and then after a second turns towards Shamrock, lifting a finger towards the slits of his helmet.

“Inadvisable,” says the man.

Basil frowns and then relents. They haven’t eaten yet, so Shamrock’s body is very acidic right now.

“Flip it,” says Jubilee.

Fresh blinks, staring with terrified eyes. “I can’t, Jubilee!” she says. “What if it breaks?!”

“You gotta flip it,” says Jubilee. “Unless you want them to be wet on one side.”

“Can’t I just use the lid-trick?” asks Fresh, staring at her quickly crisping egg with horror in her gaze.

“Oh, sure, why not just half-ass every aspect of your life while you’re at it?” asks Jubilee. “Using the lid-trick is for people who are afraid to live. Flip the fucking egg!” they bark.

Fresh cries, sticking the spatula beneath the first browning egg and then quickly flips it, closing an eye in fear as she waits for the inevitable leak of a broken yolk to start.

Nothing happens.

“Give it a minute,” says Jubilee. “You want to wait until the yolk gets a small film, that way you can just flip the pan and it’ll fall out.”

“Huh…” says Fresh. “Shouldn’t I just take it out with the spatula?”

Jubilee shrugs. “You can. It might work, but you can also end up breaking the yolk.” They knock the handle of the pan. “That’s why we want a heavy duty, well seasoned pan like this. Eggs’ll come right out if you flip it, no fuss.”

Fresh blinks, nodding.

“Okay, wait…” says Jubilee. “The other side is only a few seconds. And… now!” they say, Fresh grabs the cast-iron skillet from the stove top and then with a quick motion like she had seen Jubilee do, flips it over a waiting piece of bread. The egg slides out beautifully, landing on the slice. No stick, no fuss, no breakage. By all objective standards, it’s a perfect fried egg.

And yet…

Fresh howls, setting the skillet back down onto the heat. “Jubileeeee~!” she cries, falling to her knees and grabbing the fabric of her friend’s shirt, as she presses her face against their chest. “I’m never going to get it right!”

“Boy, that sure is a suspicious menu,” notes Basil from the side.

“Huh…” says Jubilee. “I would have been sure that was gonna be a good one too. Hold on,” they fight Fresh off of themselves and then set to work, making one now, using the exact same timing, method, heat, ingredients. One to one, it’s the same exact recipe, except this time made by Jubilee instead of Fresh.

Jubilee shrugs.

Fresh, meanwhile, continues to cry at the table, Basil consoles her with one hand, while quietly sliding the cursed egg away towards Shamrock.

Glass scratches across the table. Fresh lifts her face from her arms and looks as Shamrock slowly pushes the egg away from himself with one finger. Feeling her gaze, the man turns his helmet to meet her eyes. The two of them stare at each other for a second. Glass scratches as Shamrock keeps pushing the plate further away from himself.

Fresh howls.

“Fuck off!” barks Jubilee. “Sun isn’t even up yet, you’re giving me a headache.”

“I’m cursed, Jubilee!” argues Fresh. “The egg gods hate me!”

Jubilee sighs. “There’s no such thing.”

“Actually-” starts Basil.

“Shut up, Basil,” interjects Jubilee, pointing at Basil with a butter-knife. “Nobody wants to hear your crazy stories.”

“They’re not crazy stories!” argues the priestess. She crosses her arms.

Jubilee raises an eyebrow. “Anyways. Who the fuck knows?” they ask. “You’re cursed, so maybe whoever made that curse also set it up so that you can never make a good egg.”

Basil sighs. “And how does that make more sense?”

Jubilee shrugs, cutting into their egg-toast. “Fuck me if I know. Ask her, she’s the one who’s cursed,” they say, nodding towards Fresh.

Basil thinks for a moment. “Can’t we do anything about that?” she asks. “Or at least look into the matter?” she suggests. “It would be great to have more information.”

Fresh shakes her head. “I’m cursed because I went left, Basil,” she says.

“Huh?”

Fresh nods. “The fountain gave me the curse. It’s because of some choices I made back then, before we met.”

“Huh…” says Basil. “But… what does it do?”

“It makes my stats bad,” says Fresh.

Jubilee nods. “And it makes your eggs shit.”

Fresh nods. “I think it also makes chickens and anqas hate me.”

“How oddly specific,” says Basil. “…I wonder if that really all has a connection with the egg thing?”

Jubilee shrugs. “Makes sense to me, but I can’t say that I give a fuck. We’ll just keep her away from anqas and forbid her from making eggs and life will be okay.”

Basil thinks for a moment, before then shrugging. “Okay. Sounds fine to me,” says the priestess. “Shamrock?”

“Agreed.”

“Hey!” argues Fresh.

“Shut up and eat your fucking egg,” barks Jubilee, sliding the plate with the bag egg back her way. Fresh frowns, staring at it.

The yolk breaks, as if all by itself and leaks off of her plate, messily onto the table.

Razmatazz

I’d consider doing a Muldrich spin-off series, but honestly, I don’t think that you guys could handle it. Too intense.

Thank you kindly for reading!

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