Even If It’s Not Love - Chapter 46.1

Seeing that, Woo-hyun grabbed his stepmother’s wrist as if he couldn’t ignore it any longer. Her face, filled with tears, turned to Woo-hyun.

“The grave is ruined.”

“…”

“This is Eun-soo’s house now.”

“…”

He had no talent for comforting. Fortunately, however, his words made his stepmother stop. Seeing the dented part on the grave, the stepmother opened her hand in surprise and urgently pressed it with her palm.

It must have hurt, my baby, it must have hurt, I’m sorry, Mommy is sorry. While repeating those words.

Her behavior was erratic, and she quickly moved between tranquility and terrible pain. After repeating that a few times, she soon stared at the cloudy sky with a dispirited expression. Even though they contained a cloudy light, her eyes were dark.

“… I heard.”

His stepmother’s cracked voice spread through the air.

“That bastard is dead.”

“…”

“Thank you.”

“…”

“It seems you have gotten blood on your hands again. I’m sorry.”

His stepmother was greatly mistaken. She was mistaken that Woo-hyun had been actively involved in Yi-woon’s death. However, Woo-hyun did not correct her. For some reason, it seemed like it was more for his stepmother, and Eun-soo seemed to want it.

“He must have gone to hell, so he won’t meet Eun-soo again.”

“…”

“Yeah, that should be it. If there is a Heaven, that should be it.”

His stepmother said, as if muttering. Then, she got up. The stepmother, who was empty after pouring out her emotions, seemed to have no strength.

“Are you going to stay with Eun-soo for a while longer?”

“Yes.”

“Alright. Stay for a while. I’ll go first.”

The stepmother tried to lift the corners of her mouth. She seemed to have tried to smile, but her face looked worse than not trying. The smile that appeared on her face after a long time was that miserable.

The stepmother staggered past him. Her powerless steps were slow and arduous. Even the wind flowed slowly. In that short time, the sky sank even lower.

“Why did you do that?”

Woo-hyun asked, still keeping his gaze on the grave. The stepmother turned her head back. She seemed to be trying to make sure that what he had said was correct.

“What?”

The stepmother asked back, slowly.

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“Why did you marry someone like my father?”

“…”

“Although he was my father, he wasn’t a man with many strengths, and he wasn’t very likeable.”

A poor, single father with some debt. If she got married to him, she would have to work hard to make ends meet. It was a difficult condition to choose easily unless she was a person with a ‘Princess Pyonggang disease’.

(T/N: Princess Pyonggang was a princess in Goguryeo. She married Ondal the Fool, who was a commoner, and worked hard to help him become a General and achieve greatness.)

Of course, his stepmother had some chronic illness. However, even if she couldn’t find an excellent marriage, she could still get a proper one.

But why did she marry someone like his father?

Woo-hyun had questioned it every now and then, but he hadn’t been able to ask until now. He asked impulsively, feeling a hunch that he would never be able to ask if it wasn’t for now.

“Your father came to the factory where I worked and gave me a rose. He gave it to me in everyone’s presence.”

Though his stepmother answered after a while, it only added to his doubts. The situation was not passionate or persuasive enough for her to choose a single father.

Was she saying she gave up her life with just one single rose? No matter how insignificant life is, it isn’t worth that little.

While he was calmly reproaching himself,

“You’re wondering what made me make up my mind like that, right?”

“…”

Woo-hyun chose to remain silent because he couldn’t deny it, even if he said empty words.

“That’s right. Now that it came to this, I have also been having those thoughts. It wasn’t even a bouquet of roses; it was only one single rose… I can’t believe I got married. I think I was really young and immature. But at that moment, it was enormous.”

“…”

“To me, the youngest daughter who was looked down on, always had to take care of my brothers, and was bullied by my grandmother who said she raised me and that I should make money for food, was always called Miss Kim by the people at the factory because they didn’t even knew my name, and didn’t have many friends because I have a passive personality, your father said, ‘I bought it because I thought of Mi-soon.’, and for the first time in my life, I felt like I was the protagonist. It had been a long time since anyone had called me Mi-soon.”

“…”

“So I’m not a person for anyone, I am Lee Mi-soon. That’s what I thought at that moment.”

“…”

“At that moment, I felt like I could overcome all the other conditions. Because for the first time, I felt like I had gotten back the life I was robbed off and had to share with everyone.”

“…”

“It must be hard to understand, right? What kind of feeling this is.”

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(T/N: As you may have noticed, the stepmother’s name in this chapter is different from the one mentioned before. At the time of writing, I also have no idea whether it was deliberated or a mistake on the author’s part ;-; )

It must be hard for him to understand the feeling of life being completely turned upside down by such trivial and insignificant things.

‘Sometimes the wind, which could not knock down a sandcastle, is able to capsize a boat floating on the sea’, the stepmother added.

Woo-hyun’s gaze went beyond Eun-soo’s grave and to the graves behind it.

Woo-hyun answered with a low voice, but the stepmother who had already turned her back to him did not hear the answer. When Woo-hyun’s gaze reached Eun-soo’s grave again, the stepmother had already left the memorial park completely.