Everlastingly Loving You - Chapter 146

Sophia sat on her quarters’ floors, finally having a moment to herself and herself only.

She hadn’t been left alone since Julia’s untimely demise. A moment to herself was what she seemingly needed.

She heaved a sigh of relief – she’d locked her doors and Nicholas was god knows where.

All her raw emotions rushed in, and she found herself getting teary.

Her heart thudded faster by a tenfold – these were the emotions she’d been holding back.

These were the emotions she never got to release since they’d been bottled up inside her.

It was only a matter of time before she exploded.

She sniffled once.

One sniffle turned into two.

Sophia found herself on her bedroom floor, sobbing.

No one was there to comfort her and assure her everything was going to be okay – and that was why she let go of all her emotions at once.

She always had the mindset that she had to stay strong for those around her – and by that she meant no breaking down into tears or anything like that.

To her, strong girls didn’t cry. They sucked everything up inside of them, they bottled in all their emotions and they naturally had a catharsis without crying or intensely sobbing on the floor of their own quarters like her.

They were strong in front of their loved ones – their friends and family. Worrying them was not their intention, neither was it hers.

She refused Nicholas to see her this way. The truth was, in Sophia’s eyes, she was the epitome of weak, and cowardice.

Her grandmother’s death had been the last straw.

Had it been anyone else… Who knew?

Covering her mouth with her hands, she kept on sobbing.

Left all alone in her quarters, she finally felt free. Not that she felt horrible around Nicholas – that was certainly not the case.

She simply wanted some time for her own.

To process things.

To grieve and mourn the loss of her grandmother who’d taken her under her wing.

Without Julia, she wouldn’t have met Nicholas.

Without Julia, she wouldn’t have the relationship she did with Louis as of the current moment.

Julia taught her everything and gave her the world.

There was no one in her family that she wanted to see more than Julia. How she’d give anything to see her once more. To be able to feel the warmth of her embrace, or hear Julia laugh over something she found frivolous alongside her.

‘I miss you,’ Sophia whispered as tears continued streaming down her cheeks.

Around everyone else, she had composed herself. Made herself seem like she was fine even after the death of her mentor and grandmother.

But she wasn’t. And this would take some time getting used to.

The last thing she wanted was to get coddled or treated specially after she experienced this. She merely desired for things to return back to the way they were. Before Raymond had arrived, and before Julia had died.

Had Sophia gotten the chance to restart her life or change one extremely important aspect, it’d be her parents. Growing up without parents impacted her greatly, although she never chose to admit it to anyone.

Her mother was dead – that was something she’d made her peace with. She was glad to have Louis there while she grew up, and Julia as well.

Louis was her closest confidante, but it was Julia that’d taught her everything she knew.

How she had to stand up for herself and never take anything less than what she deserved when it came to matters.

How she couldn’t let being a royal get to her head because that was not what royals acted like.

To remain calm and composed during situations where the best thing to do was to panic and fret.

And where was Raymond during all of this? Where was her father?

For about the first half of her life, he’d been occupied with work. So did Julia, but she made time to spend time with her grandchildren and to ensure they were alright.

When Sophia was ill, her father had never come to visit her, he’d ask how she was doing but otherwise, he couldn’t care any less.

Sophia reasoned it was because she reminded him of her mother. His wife.

But that couldn’t be his reason, blaming his innocent children for reminding him of his dead wife. How cruel could he be to do such a thing?

He’d left for ages!

He left no trace of him behind for anyone to find.

So much so that everyone had given up hope.

Sophia had thought it was the last once she heard they’d found his corpse.

She was relieved, relieved to know that was the last of it.

But turns out, it wasn’t.

At this point, everything was practically endless.

__

Louis didn’t seem to react to things similar to Sophia, instead of crying, he was filled with rage.

Marcus sat on the ottoman at the foot of the bed, staying silent as he listened to Louis.

“Where does my father get off, showing up this abruptly.”

“Of all times, he showed up after his own mother had died.”

“What kind of horrible person would do such a thing, let alone my own father?” Louis asked irritably.

“You called him your father,” Marcus noticed.

Louis tensed.

“In terms of paternity,” Louis explained.

Marcus nodded, a look of understanding crossed his face.

“And?”

“What else?” Marcus questioned.

“What do you mean, what else?”

“There’s something else you’ve got to say,” Marcus nodded.

“Yes?” He raised his brow.

Louis blinked.

In fact, he actually did have something else to say.

“I just…” He plopped down on the ottoman, taking a seat right beside Marcus.

“I’m just…”

“I’m wondering why this is all happening at once.”

“Julia’s death.”

“My father’s sudden appearance.”

“So why is this all happening to me?”

“Now, especially?” Louis rested his face in his hands.

“I just… I went from celebrating the fact I had a boyfriend to grieving the loss of my grandmother and meeting my father, all in an extremely short period of time.”

“Things were beginning to go right for me,” Louis exhaled.

“Things were FINALLY beginning to go right for me,” he mumbled to himself.

He gulped.

__

“It’s terrible, what happened to them,” Blaine said to Clarisse.

“Right?’

“Poor Sophia lost her grandmother and met her father in a span of a week,” Clarisse said guiltily.

“And Louis, oh god, Louis,” Clarisse sighed.

“I don’t even know what to do,” she admitted.

“I’ve never had to be there for someone who’ve been through this, and I certainly don’t know how to comfort someone who’s lost a family member.”

“I’m a horrid friend,” she facepalmed.

“You most certainly are not,” Blaine said.

Clarisse turned to him.

“Yeah, that’s not helping,” she shook her head.

“I’m trying to be there for them but that’s not what they need.”

“Sophia’s unwilling to see me, and not only does Louis not want me there I’m likely one of the last people he’d want to see currently.”

“Why’d she be unwilling to see you, you’re her best friend,” Blaine creased his brow.

Clarisse reasoned, “Because when you lose someone you act irrationally, or at least in Sophia’s case.”

“It’s understandable, but seriously, I have no idea what to do.”

“And I doubt Raymond wants to meet me either,” Clarisse added, slightly grateful her family wasn’t messed up like Sophia’s was.

So she had an arranged marriage – she could do something about it at the very least.

This?

This, on the other hand was something Sophia was completely helpless in.

And Oliver wasn’t too bad – they were completely platonic after all – she was in love with Blaine anyway.

She sighed, this whole thing was a huge, chaotic mess.

One she should’ve not gotten involved in in the first place.

She wondered how Sophia was feeling.

Nicholas wasn’t helping her – he’d lost someone too.

Of course, Nicholas and her were getting through things in their own special way but they were still adjusting and adapting to things.

They’d both lost someone, and yes, Raymond had shown up in Julia’s funeral unannounced and unexpectedly, but that didn’t make things less horrible.

Even if neither sides wanted to admit, this had put a strain in their relationship.

How could it not?

Clarisse knew Sophia and Nicholas were strong enough to get through this tgoether so long as they believed in each other and stuck by each other, but seeing how unstable they were – even if they tried hiding it – only made her worry even more.

She knew Sophia from the inside out.

She knew the current Sophia who tried keeping a facade whenever she was with her friends and family merely to not get them worried.

The Sophia who’d go to great lengths to protect those she loved and cared about because she was fiercely loyal, and the same Sophia who’d fallen in love with Nicholas and knew without Julia this wouldn’t have happened.