Faithful to Buddha, Faithful to You - Chapter 78: :promise
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Pan Zheng took a pulse on my right hand, half-closed eyes, silent. Today is not the day of his routine diagnosis, he was just invited by Roche. Therefore, it is rare that Monson was not present this time.
Pan Zheng looked at my tongue fur again, and his eyebrows gradually twisted: “How many nosebleeds has Madam recently bleed?”
“Just last night…”
“Ai Qing!” Rosh! He has never used such a harsh tone on me.
Closing his eyes, he said bitterly in his throat when he opened it again: “Since pregnancy, there have been five times…”
“Ai Qing, why don’t you hide it!” He almost violently jumped, never having a temperament, and there were moments that scared me so much. I bowed my head and tears rolled uncontrollably, dripping onto the swollen belly. He froze when he saw tears in my eyes. Can’t bear to blame again, clenched his fists, and knocked on the window frame at once.
“Pan Mou didn’t dare to confirm the diagnosis before. During the three months of observation, the wife had concealed her condition and told the Master today.” Pan Zheng sighed and stood up to lower his voice and gave Rosh a fist. The two organs are too weak, and the spleen does not produce blood, which leads to a pale face, nosebleeds, and dizziness. It is indeed blood deficiency.”
Rosh seemed to have been heavily boxed, and the whole person stood still, his mouth trembling and speechless. The gloomy eyes gathered and stared at me sadly. I smiled bitterly, this result was expected long ago, but not as sad as Roche. Not daring to look at him again, he swallowed back to Pan Zheng and asked, “Mr. Pan, may the fetus in my belly be kept?”
“This…” Pan Zheng hesitated, glanced at Roche, and continued, “The wife is still young, and she should be able to survive through the tire protection. However, the production is a major loss, and the birth of the child, the wife may be…”
“Mr. Pan, I don’t want my child anymore. I just ask you to save your life!” Rosh grabbed Pan Zheng’s sleeve and burst into tears, staring at Pan Zheng with all expectations.
Pan Zheng was also moving, but shook his head helplessly: “Mage, my wife has been pregnant for nearly five months. If you give birth, it will endanger your mother, and you will have two lives.”
“Is there no way?” Rosh trembles all over the body, choking back and forth, without a sentence. “Is there any way?”
“Rosh, don’t worry.” I took his trembling hands and put it on my stomach, took a deep breath, and said with a smile, “Our child is very strong, and it will definitely survive with me.”
Suddenly my stomach was lifted, and I was so strong that I never had it. It seemed to be proclaiming its vitality to us. Rosh was stunned, stroking my stomach carefully, and then suddenly looked up at me.
I smiled and looked at his sad eyes in the dim tears: “Look, the baby is telling us that it is going to live.”
Before Pan Zheng left, he prescribed a new prescription, and Roche told his disciples to take it. That day he didn’t go to Lu Guang again, accompanied me all day, and was extremely gentle. I took a long nap in his arms, and when I woke up, it was almost dusk. A sunset glare projected outside the house, his face cut out a hazy halo in the dim yellow. Stretching his hands to wipe the corners of his eyes, he was startled, woke up, and hurriedly wiped the tears off the corners of his eyes with his back.
“What do you want to call your child?” Hum, pretending not to see his tears.
He turned his head towards me, his eyes red and swollen. Take a sniff, and pretend to say easily: “If it’s a girl, call it Xiaoqing.”
I laughed and thumped his chest lightly: “Isn’t the boy named Xiaoshi named after you?”
“Alright.” He nodded seriously, “The girl’s name is Xiaoqing, the boy’s name is Xiaoshi.”
“This…” I concluded, and tilted my head to think about it, “Oh, let’s be a nickname. The nickname needs to be raised separately. Xiaoqing, Xiaoshi, this name is not impressive at all.”
“What style?” He shook his head, staring at my stomach, sighing quietly, “This name, from the parents, is the proof that the parents love it.”
Yes, his own name came from his parents. He is a Guizi, and there is no tradition for the Han to name his children to avoid elders.
“Okay. Your name is up to you.” I laughed hard, but he stared at me in a daze. Only a moment later, the sorrow that I couldn’t bear came out of my eyes.
“I’m going to see if dinner is okay.” He woke up abruptly and concealed in a panic. “You’re lying on the bed, I will eat with you here.”
Bow my head and kiss my forehead, tuck the blanket for me. When he went out, he was seen lifting his hand to the corner of his eyes and wiping it. The thin and tall body was a bit rickety, and it seemed that he was carrying a heavy burden on his shoulders, which made him unable to straighten his back. The dim light shone on the maroon monk’s clothes, and it was lonely and sad.
The moment his figure disappeared, he couldn’t help it anymore, two lines of tears slipped down, dripping bit by bit, melting into the summer blanket.
Monson came to the door by himself the day after he was diagnosed with blood deficiency. Roche let him see me politely, but after seeing him, he just stared at me blankly. After watching it for a while, I turned around unexpectedly and left without saying a word from beginning to end. Roche watched him leave, with a complex look in his eyes, but asked me nothing.
Roche took a leave of absence to Lu Guang. Lu Guang saw that he had no intention of taking care of others, and he was happy to sell his favors, allowing him to accompany his wife daily. The disciples returned the money to each family, and then at his command, practiced in the so-called temple. He led his disciples to do morning and evening classes, and answered questions with one hour a day. The rest of the time, all with me.
Pan Zheng now comes to the clinic every five days. Monson never visited again after that time, but still paid for Pan Zheng’s diagnosis. From time to time, someone will send valuable medicinal herbs to come and ask who sent it, and the person will never say. Ginseng, antler, hawksbill turtle, pearl powder, etc., regardless of whether I can eat it.
The weather is getting hotter in July. The child has been up for five months. Every day when he gets up, he seems to feel that his belly is bigger than yesterday. Stomach upright, more and more afraid of heat. He wouldn’t let me do anything, even take a shower and change clothes. Pieces of trivial things, he never used to do it, but as long as it is related to me, he refuses to fake others.
Even if I take the medicine on time every day, try to reduce my activities, and try my best to calm my mind, I still have another nosebleed. This time, the interval was shorter and the blood stopped longer than before. Roche’s face was paper-faced and he couldn’t help trembling, holding me in his arms. It seems that if I let go, I will disappear. It’s me instead, comforting him okay.
Resting his head on his shoulder, he looked at the blue sky outside the window. There was no cloud, the sound of cicadas, the hot wind blowing in, and the warmth of the cold from the heart.
“Rosh, what’s wrong with you?”
When I woke up, I saw the sky was already bright, and cheerful birdsong came out of the window. He sat by the bed and stared at me blankly. His eyes were red and swollen, his chin was stubble, and his face was pale and pale.
Suddenly realized: “Have you not slept all night?”
Holding my hand against his cheek, he smiled softly: “I want to see you more…”
Why do you say that? I was shocked and wanted to get up and hold him.
“Ai Qing, you must listen to me this time.” His voice is still warm and jade, but with unquestionable determination.
Take a deep breath and slowly say: “Rosh wants to understand that the only way to save you and your child is to let you go back. You said that your era is advanced in medicine and you can cure any disease. Just go back, You and your child can be saved.”
I shook my head and sat up anxiously, rushing into his arms and crying: “Rosh, if I go back, I’m afraid I won’t be able to see you again…”
He gently stroked my hair at once, and his tone was still firm: “Even if I can’t see you again in my life, Roche will have to let you go back. This is for you and our children…”
“No, I don’t want to leave you…”
“Ai Qing, listen to me!” He held my shaking head and whispered, “You are not only my wife, you are also a mother.”
Lifting my shoulders and staring at me firmly: “The era in which Roche is living, the war is fleeing, and the famine is year after year. Roche is detained again, and he can’t really give the child a good environment. After you take it back to the millennium, settle down and peace, Life is rich, it can grow healthy. Compared to the two, Roche would rather grow his own flesh and bones in your time.”
“As for Rosh…” Seeing that I was still shaking my head and crying, he kissed me pitifully, holding my head, and smiled slightly, “After you leave, Rosh will concentrate on practice, hide his light, and wait for 16 years to go to Chang’an Translate the Scriptures and translate the scriptures. Even if I am alone, I will also fulfill the mission given by the Buddha and lay the foundation of the Dharma in the Central Plains. Then, I will wait for you with a smile in hell.”
“Rosh, you will not be alone. You will have wives and concubines and two twins in the future. You will have your own family in Chang’an. I don’t want to go, I don’t want you to…” I cried and stopped. , The heart is like a knife cut, sobbing, “Forget me…”
“What nonsense?” He interrupted me angrily, lifted my chin, and looked at his clear eyes.
He has a serious look, and he is extremely serious in every word: “In Roche’s life, only you are the only wife. To marry you as a monk, it was a great controversy. How could there be another wife or concubine? Can’t a man live without a woman?”
“This is the history book…”
He seemed to think of something, frowning slightly, thinking about it and asking, “Then tell me, how is it written in the history book?”
Such as chewing the yellow gall and bitterly reciting a few words of the nightmare in the “Book of Jin” that generally tortured me: “Taste the scriptures in Caotang Temple, and more than a thousand people from the courtiers and Dade Shamen sat and listened. Rosh. Suddenly lowered to the high seat, said Xing said:’There are two children on my shoulders, who want to stun women.’Xing Nai called the court girl into it, and gave birth to two sons.”
“This…” He was dumbfounded, his eyes widened, and he hit his fists with frustration on the bed, “These descendants of nonsense are talking nonsense! How can they describe the black rosh like this!”
“Ai Qing, you believe that Roche will do such ridiculous things? Unless…” Suddenly stopped, his eyes suddenly lit up, looked at me with a strange look, and then his lips became more and more curved, he actually Laughing!
He laughed loudly, his belly bent over with a smile, and tears in the corner of his eyes. I have never seen him laugh so miserably. In doubt, he was suddenly hugged hard: “Ai Qing, it’s you, it’s you back!”
“Rosh…”
“You are that maid, you will come back again, and we will have two more children.”
There was still a mess in his head, and he fell into a daze in his arms. That maid is me? Will it really be me? Can I really cross it again?
He lifted me up, nodded with the most determined eyes, and comforted me: “Ai Qing, go back to your time, give birth to the child, and live well. For the husband to wait for you in Chang’an…”
“It was sixteen years…” The trembling voice stared into his tenacious gaze, his heart was grabbed, so painful that he couldn’t breathe.
He held my hand in front of his chest, with a halo of haze in his eyes: “Don’t Rosh wait for ten years and ten years? Is it difficult to wait another sixteen years?”
He looked at me with a smile: “How can I not pay the price when I fall in love with the people in the future? I thought there was no time and space in hell, but Rosh is still alive, and he has the opportunity to see you again. What do you want? But, sixteen years later, Roche is fifty-three years old and old, you don’t want to be disgusted…”
I covered his mouth and said fiercely: “If you say this again, it’s time to fight.”
The drowning eyes seemed to be magical, sweeping away the fear all over me. Gently lifted my hand away from his lips, and opened the strongest smile tenaciously: “Rosh is really wrong, it’s time to fight.”
I finally laughed. Yeah, he can wait, why can’t I wait? The boss said that technology is constantly improving, and if you go back, you will have another chance to see you again. The electricity passing through the meter is enough, I can go back to give birth to children with the help of modern technology. Then, as long as I have enough patience to wait, one day, I can return to my husband!
“My teacher once said that it is great to live for love.” Stroking his sunken cheek, taking a deep breath, smiling at him as he met his eyes, and said in my firmest voice, “So, Luo What, I go back. You wait for me…”
“Okay!” He nodded with a smile, fingers intertwined into my hand, soft lips kissed me softly.
Slightly leaving his lips, he sighed and said, “I had a wish. Remember when you were at the driver last year, did you promise me?”
“I will accompany you to live the most secular life every year. Accompany you to go shopping for snacks, accompany you to do anything, as long as you can be happy…” His eyes dimmed and he hurriedly regained his spirit, “This year should be with you, but before It was famine, and then you became pregnant again, which has been delayed.”
Holding his monk’s clothes, coquettishly pleading: “Before I go, you will go shopping with me for a day, OK?”
He shook his head, helped me lie down, and sat next to me, holding my hand: “You have been pregnant for five months now, and your body is weak. If you have nosebleeds again, how is it good to be born?”
“Ai Qing, I promised you that I will be with you, but not now.” He gently brushed the broken hair on my forehead and whispered softly, “Come to Chang’an, shall you?”
I held out my little finger and hooked his little finger to shake: “Then you must remember, no regrets…”
“Hmm!” He smiled brightly, and the room was full of brilliance.
Indulging in his handsome smile, I suddenly heard the door of the room being gently buckled, and a respectful voice came from the door: “Master, Liang Wang Shizi asked Master to discuss things, so that he is waiting in the front hall.”
Lu Shao? What will he need to talk to Roche? He looked at Rosh in surprise. He patted my arm to reassure me. Tell me that he will come back in a while and let me sleep a little longer.
He opened the door of the room and turned to look at me again at the door. The sun was bright and sprinkled on him, and the whole person revealed a hazy Yunhua. The summer wind swept, and the poplars rustled outside the window. Cicada awakened from the dream, and began another day’s tweet. He looked at me, nodded slightly, and closed the door lightly. I closed my eyes and told myself that I must raise my body and live well. Not only for the baby, but also to meet again…