Falling In Love - Chapter 184
Lance.
I have never been as nervous as I am at this moment. Ford is watching me, his hand is squeezing mine tightly. He is as nervous as I am, but he is hiding his very well. My palms are sweaty. From all the overthinking that is going on in my head. We are at the home, Char is supposed to meet us here and I am already diving into my anxiety. Thinking of worst-case scenarios.
What if he hates us—what if he hates only me?
He is just a baby, I know that but I just want everything to be perfect. Ford said we will have to foster him for a couple of months. This is our first attempt at adoption and this has been the most important thing to me for the past couple of months. I just want everything to go well.
We are in the reception/living room of the place. I see children as they walk around and my mind wanders and thinks, with every child that he is the one.
“You are about to explode,” Ford breaks the silence.
I let out a huff because the wait is the worst thing. “Should I call her, why is she so late,” I blurt out impatiently.
He laughs because to him, I am amusing. He is not as nervous as I am, he is probably not overthinking as much as I am and this is a first because Ford is usually the one that panics. It comes with his disorder and usually, I like to balance him out by being the calm one.
“We came here early. You know damn well that Char said we should meet her here by eleven, It is just ten-thirty.” He pipes in as he glances at his watch. I roll my eyes because he is teasing me right now. Basking in the fact that I am eager about this.
“Well, I am calling her anyway.” I grab my phone and stand up from the chair. He laughs as I walk out of the house and to the front porch. With my phone in my ear, I walk over to the corner of the porch. The part that has a swinging chair. I take a seat on the rocking chair and wait for Char to answer “Dude, you have got to be patient,” she screams into my ear.
I move the phone away to block out her loud voice “You know how important this is to me. Why are you wasting time?” I accuse her.
She sighs into the phone “I am on my way. There is a lot of traffic.”
I roll my eyes because I know one thing for a fact and that is Char is never early for anything. In fact, she is never on time. I am calling her because I need her to make it for eleven unfailingly.
“Please be here on time,” I groan into the phone and this gets a laugh out of her.
“I am coming mister.”
She ends the call and for the first time since I came out here, I see a kid at the corner. He has a Rubik’s cube in his hand. He seems to be battling with it but there is this fixated expression on his face. My mind goes to the fact that he might be the one. The kid that we are here to see. He is about the same age. His hair is chestnut brown.
“Do you need help?” I walk up to him, just by the steps and he looks up with a confused expression on his face. His eyes are a sky blue colour. There are freckles all over his face, the kind that looks like an imprint on his face. Next to me, he is really tiny. The most adorable kid I have ever seen.
It takes him a couple of seconds to register that I am talking to him. A smile sprawls up to my face at the expression he has on. I know he doesn’t want to be talking to me right now. I get that, he is just a kid and the world has already dealt with him.
“I am fine,” he turns away from me and my smile widens. He is shy, I can tell that much and somehow, he calls to me. I know it is not a good idea to bond with him just yet. I mean, there is a chance that he is not the kid we are here to see but something about him just calls to me. I watch him in silence as he continues to struggle with the game. He is stubborn and I get that.
To him. Everyone failed him, so he must feel like he is better alone, without getting help but at this moment, all I want to do is help him. All I want is to see a smile on his face. After a couple of minutes, he turns to me slowly and sighs loudly. He doesn’t say a word as he slides the game to me.
I can’t help myself as I reach for it. The expression on his face is still the same as I show him the trick to the game. I have never really cared about this game, I never even thought there was anything special in knowing how to solve it but when his eyes widen as I match the colours together. I feel an accomplishment. Seeing the joy in his eyes makes me the happiest I have ever been. I give it to him when it is complete. He grabs the game from me and closes his eyes for a second. I watch him because I don’t know what to say. After a couple of seconds, he stands up and walks in the direction of the house. I watch him as my heart beats for him.
I don’t know anything about this kid but I already feel love for him. I want him to be the one so badly. I want to take care of him. I want to show him that he can be loved. “Hey kid,” I call him. He stops and turns around. I look at his shirt, it is red and there is a fire truck on it. I have never met any kid that is this quiet. Most kids ask a lot of questions. They might be stupid questions but they always talk. He seems to not have any words.
“What’s your name?”
He raises a brow “I am not supposed to talk to strangers.” He blurts before turning around and walking into the house. I get up from the floor and walk over to the entrance. I don’t know why I am panicking, it is not like I know anything about the kid. I have wanted a child for so long and I already said I wasn’t going to be choosy but what do I do when my heart is calling to him. I want to know his name because I want him.
Fuck.
Ford looks up from his phone when he sees me and a smile sprawls to his face “Not here, huh?”
“Did you see a kid pass by?” I ask him.
He furrows his brows “I’ve seen about five kids pass by.” He jokes. I am pretty sure he doesn’t even know why I am asking.
“I met a kid outside. I want him.” I blurt out my feelings.
I sit down next to him and he furrows his brows in confusion “What do you mean by you want him?” he questions.
I sigh, running my hands through my hair “I want him to be ours. I want to adopt him.”
“But we already have a kid.”
I shake my head “What if we can ask for him. Choose him? My heart just wants him, babe.” I confess my feelings. I know he must think I am insane right now. This is not some sort of supermarket. We can’t just say eenie meenie, and pick a child off the aisle.
The front door opens and Char walks in dresses in a black and white suit. Her hair is up in a tight bun and she has shades on. “Sorry I am late,” she manages as she takes off the glasses.
I stand up from the chair and walk over to her. “Took you long enough,” I roll my eyes and this gets a laugh out of her.
She grabs my arm and squeals in excitement “Finally L, We found a kid for you.” she jumps up as ford laughs out loud.
I don’t want to be a jerk in this moment and nag about how I already have the kid I want. This is not the best thing to say in this situation, but it is all I want. He is all I want.
“Can you get him already? Lance is losing his mind.” Ford interjects with the smile still on his face. He is as excited about this as I am.
“I’ll be back in a second,” she lets go of my arm and walk deeper into the house. I watch her vanish and face Ford again.
“I already have a kid I want. He is adorable and I just know that we will connect. How do I ask for him?”
He frowns “You can’t do that Lance. You can’t just reject the other kid. It is wrong on so many levels.”
I know he is right but what do I do when this is the kid I want. This is the kid my heart wants. I hear the footsteps before I can respond to Ford and just as she walks back to us, the first thing I see is the firetruck shirt.
My heart jolts against my chest as I see those big blue eyes.