Falling In Love - Chapter 210

Trick

I check everywhere I can think of. I check his office, I check Lance’s house, just to be sure. I call his phone a million times. He is not answering my calls and I know he is hurting somewhere alone and it is all my fault. I pushed him to do something that he didn’t want to do.

I made him quit, even though I knew how much it meant to him.

I am a selfish motherfucker and I don’t blame him if he never forgives me.

I know, I take all the blame for this but first I need to find him. I need to make sure he is okay. I drive around the city, calling his phone constantly, hoping that he will answer me. I drive to every place I can think of. I check the gym, the bar, the club, his favorite hangout spots, even the apartment he used to share with Lance.

He is not anywhere I go. I am running out of places to look. I have done every place I can think of. He is nowhere to be found. I don’t know what to do. The skies are dark, as rain falls even heavier than when it started. I can barely see the roads and I know he hates when I drive in the rain.

He wouldn’t have gone out, not when it is raining. I know this much about him. I know that he hates the rain. He hates getting the rain on him.

I drive to the only place left, my gallery. I know this is the last place he would be at. He must be upset with me. I hurt him so badly and I don’t even know how I can ever make things right.

I don’t know what I can do to make him forgive me.

My heart is racing as I park my car in the parking lot. I get out of the car and run to the door. I take my keys out and open the door. I switch on the lights and look around. I don’t see him. I know he is not here. Trick has a key to the gallery because this place is as much his as it is mine. I trusted him in all aspects of my life, except the one that mattered the most. I couldn’t trust him and believe that he wouldn’t leave me.

I made a mess of everything.

I check every office, including mine. Maybe he came here, maybe he was looking for me and he didn’t find me. been

I don’t know why but I know he is not here. This is when I notice that the door to the gallery is open. I walk out of the gallery and I see him. He is sitting on the floor, his knees drawn to his chest. His eyes are red and his face is wet with tears. He is shaking as he holds his knees tightly. Rain is pouring, he is wet, so I can’t even differentiate the tears from the rain. I run to him and kneel down. I see the expression on his face and I know that I have hurt him so badly. I have broken everything.

“I am so sorry,” I tell him and he says nothing. I sit down next to him and hold him. He doesn’t say anything, he doesn’t even look at me.

I know that I have hurt him and I have no idea how to fix this. I was just so scared; I saw my life falling apart and I reacted. I should have handled this better but all I could think of was protecting myself, from getting hurt. I am selfish and I am sorry. I take some deep breaths and look at him.

I hold his hand and this is when he finally looks at me. His eyes are red and swollen. His lips are quivering and I can see the pain in his eyes. I want to kiss him and tell him that I am sorry but I know that he is too hurt to listen to me. been

He is my world. He is the one person that I love the most in this world and I couldn’t even protect him.

I don’t deserve him. been

“Please, say something,” I beg him and he looks at me with his watery eyes. He is so sad and he is shaking. “Can we go inside, I need to get you warm,” I tell him because through all this, the rain is still pouring heavily. I try to help him up and he stands up. He is wearing his work clothes and they are drenched. Once we get inside, I help him out of his clothes once we are in my office. He is still crying, almost like the more I stay with him, the more the tears fall.

I know he hates me right now; he can’t even look at me. He is so hurt and I know that I have no one to blame for this, but myself.

I lead him into the bathroom and open the hot water in the tub. He is still in his boxers but his hands are covering his face. He is still sobbing and I know I need to do something.

I grab a towel and put it on the floor next to the tub. I open the tub and hold my hand out to him. He looks at me and then at the tub. I can see in his eyes that he is still hurt but he doesn’t say anything. He takes my hand and I help him in the tub. He is shaking and it breaks my heart to see him like this. I reach out for the showerhead and turn the water on. I adjust the temperature of the water and step into the tub.

I sit next to him and hold him close. I wrap my arms around him and hold him close to me. He is still shaking and I know that I am the reason for all this.

“I did what you wanted. will you come back to me now?” he whispers so low in the dead of my night.

I thought I couldn’t feel any worse but his words completely shatter me.

Fuck.