Game Director from Hell - Chapter 65: Voice (1)

Everyone has a childhood.

A time when they were small, innocent, and pure, knowing nothing about the world.

It’s the time when everything in the world is new, and one yearns for fantasies.

I had such a time too.

And like most people, I needed some fragments of the past to cherish those memories.

For example, things like the old stationery store where you could buy all sorts of odd things with coins, colorful chicks in front of the school, or dragonflies flying around the playground, or the 300-won tteokbokki from the snack bar.

You might be wondering why I’m suddenly talking about this. Well, it’s because this is a very important story when it comes to voice acting.

Memories shape a person.

More precisely, the past represented by memories accumulates to make the person we are today.

It was an extension of that story.

The antagonist from the manga I used to enjoy as a child, Black War Tyranomon.

That character played a significant role in shaping the person I am today.

“I don’t listen to anyone weaker than me.”

That character made a strong impression on 8th-grade Cheon Yeonho with just the first impression.

It felt like facing the Black Dragon within me.

The ultimate villain who crushes everything with overwhelming power and never submits to anyone.

Impressive, isn’t it?

Of course, it wouldn’t be the most memorable memory just because of that.

The reason this antagonist had such a significant impact on my memories as a person was the questions it posed through its narrative.

“Am I also living a pitiful life?”

Black War Tyranomon was a character in the story who was artificially created and questioned his own existence.

He ultimately decided his own path and chose to sacrifice himself as a complete being.

The narrative of being born to be trampled on and sacrificing oneself, the constant existential question of “Who am I?” that he faced throughout the story.

It was my first encounter with existential questions while still a child.

You could say it showed an excessive level of philosophy for a children’s manga.

You could also say that I feel embarrassed thinking about how deeply absorbed I was in it.

However, there was an undeniable fact.

The earnest contemplation of those trivial but serious questions during that time played a significant role in shaping who I am today.

Who am I, what am I living for, and what am I willing to die for?

The young me’s ponderings led me to my destination, my dream.

My dream was to become a game director.

I loved games, cherished the meaning they held, and hoped that others would feel the same emotions as I did.

So, the questions led to dreams, pushing me forward.

I became a game director, and now I was getting a miraculous second chance to save a new life.

That’s the story of the memories that made me.

Now, let’s get to the story about voice acting. It was a revelation that came to me later.

One day, I thought, “Why was that story so deeply ingrained in my young self? Why was the narrative of that somewhat ordinary antagonist so powerful to me?”

The answer came when I became an adult.

“Nice to meet you Cheon Yeonho. I’m Lee Suchang, a voice actor.”

It was the charisma.

The charisma of someone who could compress emotions into words and make them resonate even through the speaker.

The magic of a voice that could turn a character painted with pixels into a living, breathing entity, making you feel like he was there.

So, the reason why that narrative of agony had such a strong impact on me was the power of that voice.

The person who immersed me in such agony and allowed me to reach this dream must surely be able to show the same level of immersion and charisma in Hellic 3.

“It’s an honor to meet you like this.”

I bowed deeply.

In the reception room of Rewind, the man in front of me was an ordinary middle-aged man wearing glasses.

Lee Suchang, a veteran voice actor with over 20 years of experience.

I couldn’t contain my excitement and ended up being a bit impolite.

“I’m a fan. Can I ask for just one autograph before we start the conversation?”

“Sure!”

I tightly held the hand of the voice actor.

“···Yes?”

…He seemed taken aback.

***

Lee Suchang, 42 years old.

A veteran in the voice acting industry who had built a solid reputation and earned a lot of money as a voice actor on traditional television in the past.

However, now he was just an average freelance voice actor.

There was no dramatic reason for his downfall.

In fact, it was a common story of trying entrepreneurship after success, only to fail miserably.

Suchang had debts to pay off.

To resolve them, he returned to the only industry he knew well – voice acting.

But even within the current industry, he was part of the majority at the bottom, not the elite few at the top.

His long hiatus had taken a toll on him.

Voice acting required a long recovery period even after a short break.

Yet he had jumped back in, and there was no turning back.

His life as a voice actor to pay off his debts was tough.

Few people remembered him in the industry, and even when they did, he was not treated well.

If it weren’t for practical reasons, Suchang might have quit voice acting altogether.

Today was just one of those days.

The only solace was that he had managed to secure a job, which brought a sense of relief to his usual sense of doubt.

However, that feeling of relief had now turned into confusion.

“Your performance as the Black War Tyrannomon was truly outstanding. In fact, even at my age, there are times when I replay the episodes just to hear that line again. No matter how many times I hear it, it always feels fresh. That’s how well you acted.”

Today’s employer was indeed a peculiar person.

At the same time, he was a figure that could not be unknown in the industry.

“…The Game Director who became the first in Korea to win Game of the Year.”

A genius who had risen to the top of the world at a young age, now shedding the indie label and challenging the AAA level in the industry.

The expectations Suchang had before coming here were of someone strict and authoritative.

This was because he had seen too many successful people at a young age in the broadcasting industry.

He had even been willing to swallow his pride.

After all, it was not a role he could afford to pass up on, given the rare opportunity.

But now, hearing praise from such a person, his emotions were more confused than anything else.

Finally, he thought to himself.

‘What a quirky person.’

In a good way.

The praise felt genuine and sincere.

Like someone who painted fantasies, he seemed more like a creator than a businessperson.

Even though his facial expressions hardly changed, his passion as a creator was apparent.

One thing, in particular, shook Suchang’s heart.

The choice of words and attitude.

“Your voice acting has left a deep impression on me. I even watched a magical girl anime for girls just to hear your voice. You played the role of the devil with the apple, right? I don’t know how this will sound, but… when it comes to weighty villain roles, I believe there is no one better than you.”

Calling him ‘Sir,’ knowledge of the roles he played.

It was basic respect for a business partner.

But there were quite a few people in the world who didn’t even do the basics.

Just two months ago, I met with a representative from a major gaming company.

“Is this Mr. Lee Suchang? I’m here for the script reading.”

Lack of understanding or respect for the industry wasn’t uncommon. Once you stepped into the industry, you realized that there were quite a few people who considered voice actors as voices they could easily use for their characters, especially if they weren’t A-list stars like Suchang.

The feeling of being undervalued could be so intense.

Cheon Yeonho’s respect for him had elevated the impression of him in Suchang’s heart. At the same time, it added to the pressure. In other words, it was a matter of conscience.

“It was a highly anticipated project.”

Research on what you would be working on was essential before taking on a job. Suchang had done a lot of research on Hellic 3, even before taking the job. This game was a highly anticipated project not only in Korea but also globally, and there was no information available about it at this point. Suchang couldn’t help but wonder if for such a game, they should use a better-known voice actor than himself.

It was a matter of repaying kindness with kindness. Especially when you met someone professionally, the repayment had to be in terms of performance. He wasn’t confident about that.

Years of struggle and lost opportunities had eroded his confidence. Suchang clenched his fist. His palms were sweaty. There was a conflict within him.

Should he prioritize the job in front of someone who looked at him favourably, or should he recommend other voice actors and potentially put in a good word for someone else? If he recommended someone, he could introduce a fairly capable individual. After all, he was still in touch with colleagues and juniors who were categorized as stars, even though he wasn’t getting any work himself.

After a long moment, Suchang finally made a decision.

“Director.”

“Oh, yes?”

Behind his tense breath, Suchang spoke.

“Why did you choose me, if I may ask? Oh, it’s not that I dislike this job. I just… did a bit of research. I realized how much anticipation there is for this game.”

It was a brief conversation, but it revealed a certain fact. Yeonho was a good person. He had a bright future ahead of him. However, regardless of everything else, Suchang didn’t want to be an obstacle in the way of someone who liked him.

Voice acting was a profession where the sense of mismatch due to miscasting was felt more strongly compared to other jobs. Taking on a big role at this level could lead to a significant mistake.

“It was a great proposal. Honestly, from my perspective, it was a very grateful offer. But there must be other who can do it better than me. If you wish, I can recommend someone.”

Silence.

“Childhood memories are often romanticized. You mentioned that you still watch the cartoons from back then, but in the end, it’s the voice from over ten years ago. I can’t guarantee that I’ll be the same as back then. I’ve taken quite a long break.”

Suchang finally uttered the words that could cost him the opportunity. Regardless of the regret that might follow, he had to say it. He didn’t want to stand in the way of a passionate young man’s bright future.

“Have you searched thoroughly? Are you sure about me?”

What was he even thinking? He couldn’t even earn his living expenses properly, so why was he being so presumptuous?

The belated and intense regret that had surged within him was soon erased.

Yeonho’s expression changed.

Beneath his emotionless demeanour, the anticipation that had been buried disappeared without a trace, and his face soon revealed a hardened seriousness.

It’s over just like this.

The moment he lowered his head.

“It was your charisma.”

At Yeonho’s words, Suchang raised his head in surprise.

And his eyes widened.

“It was your charisma that brought life to the character you were cast for. It was because of the charisma that breathed life into the character’s suffering in your voice.”

Yeonho’s voice was devoid of doubt.

“I believe that. Being able to express suffering through one’s voice alone is a tremendous feat. And only you, as a voice actor, can do justice to the roles I have in mind.”

Suchang was as flustered as he had been when he first met Yeonho.

He couldn’t figure out how to respond to those words.

It happened simultaneously.

Ironically, at this moment, Suchang wasn’t looking at the present. He was looking at the distant past.

Yeonho’s genuine kindness and praise made Suchang recall what he had forgotten.

“Have you received the script?”

“Yes.”

“It won’t be any different from Black War Tyrannomon. The barbarian whose role you will play must experience suffering and agony as they deny the path they once believed in. They must keep moving forward relentlessly, free from any constraints.”

What flashed through his mind were past experiences. Before he even thought about the instability of his livelihood, the thrill of breathing life into a character through his voice resurfaced, sweeping away the dust that had accumulated within Suchang.

“Just express that. It doesn’t matter if your voice has changed over the years. You’re the one who can embody the barbarian character. Let the years show in your voice. Unlike Black War Tyrannomon, this guy is a human who has weathered severe storms. It’ll suit you even better.”

Suchang loved being a voice actor. He loved how characters came to life as he voiced them. He loved seeing kids immerse themselves in those characters and escape to different worlds.

While reminiscing about these things, he suddenly realized something.

“To me, you’re the best voice actor. The charisma that moved my heart exists only in your voice.”

At that moment, the fact that the child who had grown up watching him perform with such passion was right in front of him struck him.

“Is that enough of an answer?”

They say that as you get older, your emotions become richer. Perhaps that’s why Suchang was moved by words that might have seemed cliché.

He felt a surge of embarrassment.

Embarrassment about his own mediocrity.

Embarrassment about doubting the person who had believed in him.

Suchang couldn’t respond immediately.

At that moment, Yeonho spoke up.

“I remember a lot of things. Especially the philosophical lecture that Black War Tyrannomon gave when meeting the final boss, the one where he said, ‘You should do it somewhere else.’”

A memorable scene.

Suchang let out a dry laugh.

Then, he found himself speaking in the same tone he had used during those days.

“You have to eliminate the trash!”

Yeonho’s body froze for a moment.

His wide-open eyes and trembling lips vividly conveyed the emotions he was feeling.

In that moment, Suchang felt a deep sense of fulfilment.

Someone who remembered him and carried those memories had grown up like this. It struck him deeply once again.

Yeonho took a deep breath, then burst into laughter.

“You’re good.”

Suchang also burst into laughter.

His face turned red with embarrassment.

“Sorry, I said something weird. If you entrust it to me, I’ll do my best.”

“Of course.”

As they shook hands in agreement, Yeonho added one more thing.

“But… there’s something I wanted to say.”

“Yes?”

“Well…”

Yeonho hesitated for a moment, his lips trembling, before finally speaking.

“Can you consider casting other voice actors as well? We haven’t proceeded with the casting for anyone other than you.”

A somewhat hesitant tone.

Suchang laughed heartily.

“Of course. There are plenty of talented juniors.”

And so, the contract was signed.

***

People cannot see themselves objectively.

Because momentary emotions or circumstances always obscure their self-perception.

Suchang was no different.

Among voice actors, he was better known by others than he himself remembered.

To be precise, they remembered the pre-time-worn Suchang more vividly.

“Just do it right away.”

“What?”

“I said do it now! Its Suchang senior!”

“But, the fee…”

“Oh, then just lower it! I am doing it with the senior, so I should definitely go for it!”

Star voice actors were on the move.

Their senior, whom they admired and idolized, had extended a hand to them first after ten years.

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