God Made Incompatibility - Chapter 58
“Who needs it?” Shen Tinghua quickly replied.
Sheng Jinshu typed: “I.”
A few seconds after the news was sent, Shen Tinghua’s call came. Sheng Jinshu’s eyelashes were still soaked with water, and she couldn’t breathe well. She didn’t want to let Shen Tinghua notice, so she didn’t pick it up. She sent a message asking, “Are you at home? I’ll go look for you.”
Shen Tinghua replied in seconds: “at home.”
Sheng Jinshu should: “Okay.”
She let go of Meng Wanji’s pillow, stroked a thin hair that fell from Meng Wanji on the sheets, curled her fingertips, took a deep breath and got out of bed, put her pillow, the quilt Meng Wanji prepared for her, and the pajamas. After finishing all the clothes in the closet and returning to the second bedroom, she drove to the villa her mother left for her, took the film taken during the review after the year, and went to Shen Tinghua’s house.
Shen Tinghua’s heart froze when she received her text message. When she saw the CT film brought by Sheng Jinshu, her whole expression froze.
CT showed that Sheng Jinshu had two multiple ground-glass nodules on his left lung, which were a bit large. She looked down at the report, and the CT report indicated that the larger one was 0.8 cm, which needed to be combined with clinical practice.
Sheng Jinshu sat on the single sofa and explained: “I found it during the physical examination in country G last year, and now it seems to be a little bigger than the first review after returning to China. There is no earlier film for comparison, I don’t know whether it is Didn’t or didn’t find out before.”
“The doctor in country G said that there is a possibility of early-stage lung cancer. He suggested that I take anti-inflammatory treatment and observe it for three months. If there is no change in three months, I can continue to observe it. If there is any change, it is recommended that I remove it by surgery.”
Shen Tinghua nodded: “This size is relatively high risk. It seems to be in good shape now, but it is safer to cut it off.”
Although she is not a thoracic surgeon, she has some understanding. There is a high probability that a ground-glass nodule of this size is bad, especially considering the family history of Sheng Jinshu’s mother, who died because she was discovered too late for treatment.
“It doesn’t matter.” She reassured Sheng Jinshu with consideration: “We found out early, even if it is bad, it is only a small infiltration at most, just cut it off, it has almost no effect.”
Sheng Jinshu said “um”, and his emotions were not very high.
Shen Tinghua thought she was worried, and emphasized: “Really, minor surgery may leave a scar.”
Sheng Jinshu smiled and forced a joke: “Can’t you find me a beauty thread?”
She knew what kind of surgery it was, and she had never been afraid of it before.
After her mother was gone, she left the Sheng family and the city where she grew up. She wandered in a foreign country for many years like no one, with no direction, no expectations, no need for anyone, and no need for anyone. Anywhere can be hers. Home, where is not her home, in fact, has long felt boring.
The only thing in the world that she still cares about is her grandmother, but even her grandmother will leave her sooner or later.
No one can accompany her forever. It’s too difficult to be happy, she doesn’t know what it means to be stubbornly living in this world day after day, year after year.
So when she got this diagnosis, she was surprised for a moment, and then she felt relieved.
It happens to everyone, sooner or later. She didn’t want to toss or lose any part of her body, so only after thinking about it, she chose to resign and return to China, spend more time with her grandmother, do something that might be meaningful, and let the flow take its course and follow the arrangements for her.
But Meng Wanji made her timid.
She was afraid that it was too late to turn around.
Shen Tinghua laughed: “It depends on the situation. I will ask you when the time comes. Beauty lines are not necessarily smaller than ordinary line scars.”
She confirmed to her: “Do you want to do it in the city’s first hospital, or go to the provincial chest hospital? I can easily contact both sides.”
Sheng Jinshu trusts: “It’s okay, you can help me arrange it.”
“Okay.” Shen Tinghua agreed: “I will bring the film to the directors on both sides on Monday and see what they say before deciding.”
Sheng Jinshu has no opinion.
Shen Tinghua put the CT film back in the bag, thinking about it and caring: “Where’s Xiao Meng? Why didn’t she come with you?”
Sheng Jinshu’s eyes dimmed, and she lowered her eyes and said, “She doesn’t know.”
Shen Tinghua’s costume film stopped, and looked at Sheng Jinshu in surprise.
“she does not know?”
Sheng Jinshu’s voice was slightly astringent: “Well.”
“I haven’t told anyone before.”
“You didn’t tell them when you fell in love with them?”
“Yeah.” Sheng Jinshu bit his lower lip lightly.
Shen Tinghua’s brows furrowed into a hill, and his tone became more serious: “But you are going to have an operation soon, and you are not going to tell her?”
Sheng Jinshu defaults.
Shen Tinghua’s expression showed obvious disapproval.
Sheng Jinshu looked at the shadow cast by himself on the ground and exhaled: “Senior sister, I broke up with her.”
“Wait until the surgery is over.” If something really happened, then Meng Wanji didn’t need to know.
Just stop here. She is to blame, and Meng Wanji deserves a better future.
Shen Tinghua didn’t know what to say about her.
She didn’t have much contact with Meng Wanji, but in the few contacts she had, she could feel how rigorous Meng Wanji was in dealing with the world and how solemn she was in dealing with her feelings. It’s impossible to hide when she likes someone. Anyone can see how special and how she loves Sheng Jinshu.
What is Ke Shengjinshu doing? Does she take love as a game, as a spice for a boring life?
She wanted to scold her, but seeing Sheng Jinshu’s pale face and drooping eyelashes, she didn’t look lonely, and she couldn’t say anything too serious.
“I didn’t know you were such a **** before.” She rubbed her brows and sighed.
Sheng Jinshu smiled bitterly, hiding his face in his hands: “I didn’t know that before.”
She grew up listening to her parents’ fairy tale love story. Parental love was her initial and all fantasy of so-called love, but in the end, her father smashed it a little bit with his own hands.
He made her understand that the so-called beliefs are used for disillusionment; the so-called love is also time-sensitive.
Loving couples can be in vain in a flash, like teacher Su Yunqing and her husband who cheated on her to pursue a boy; mountain alliances and vows can’t escape ashes, like senior sister who has been waiting for her first love for five years and finally only waits for the other party’s marriage news.
She watched the ons and offs of the people around her, and she reconciled with her initially stubborn self.
It is better to say that you do not believe in love than to believe in forever.
Loving is too easy, but always too hard to keep promises. The flowering period of love is too short, passion always recedes, too naive sometimes is a burden to yourself and others. Most people can only accompany you for a short distance in your life, and it is a fluke to have a chance to hold an umbrella together.
Don’t exaggerate your liking into love, and don’t promise things you can’t do. It’s enough to be free and easy when you are apart, and to have fun when you like it.
She thought so, so when she didn’t know if her life was counting down to meet Meng Wanji and found that she liked her and she also had a good impression of her, she was novel and moved, and she didn’t care whether it would last for a long time. thing.
She thought that love is not a long-term thing, and whether she has a long-term future has nothing to do with Meng Wanji.
She just wants to fall in love with her, steal a fire with her in the winter, make her happy and keep herself warm.
Even for lung cancer, from early stage to late stage, there are still several years, enough for them to go through the process of liking, enjoying, cooling, getting bored, and going their separate ways.
It’s just that she didn’t expect that feelings are far more uncontrollable than she imagined, and Meng Wanji is also a person far braver and more persistent than she imagined. She is like the only fairy tale in the adult world, the only exception in the eternity of hypocrisy.
She gave her a real heartbeat, gave her the happiness and stability she had never enjoyed since the age of sixteen, and made her fascinated and fell unconscious; Being able to look forward to it for a long time also infected her unknowingly, making her shake, nostalgic, and ashamed.
She realizes how arrogant and cruel her preconceptions are. She regrets day by day, fears day by day, and greed day by day.
I want to accompany Meng Wanji through more winters, and I want to see Xueluo covered with white hair.
I want to have a chance to tell her that she loves her too.
*
It seems to be much better than the previous Cold War period, and their relationship has not been very rigid after the breakup. Meng Wanji retained a lot of softness and did not deliberately avoid Sheng Jinshu. She just stopped washing, eating, exercising, and sleeping together. Sheng Jinshu also tacitly maintained the same sense of proportion as her. Not too out of bounds, not too distant.
Colleagues at school joked that the two of them had lost weight together, and why did they lose a lot of weight all of a sudden, Meng Wanji and Sheng Jinshu looked at each other, smiled and didn’t answer.
Sadly hidden in the bottom of my heart.
In the first week after the May Day holiday, the self-study get out of class ended on Thursday evening. Sheng Jinshu, who had not appeared outside Meng Wanji’s evening self-study class for many days, suddenly appeared and greeted her easily at the door: “Mr. Xiao Meng, Yu Xingqian, give it to me. The transcript has been issued, let me show it to you.”
The noise of the whole class fell silent.
Meng Wanji realized something.
She pulled her lips, nodded in agreement, packed up her textbooks and went out with her.
“No need, I don’t care about those speculations.” For some unknown reason, rumors began to spread among the students that Meng Wanji beat the mandarin ducks with a stick, and tipped off Xi Weiting and Yu Xingqian with Xi Weiting’s parents.
Some of the students who were close to Xi Weiting and Yu Xingqian privately criticized Meng Wanji.
“Besides, it’s the end of the period.” She looked indifferent, the implication being that she would leave soon.
Sheng Jinshu’s eyes wavered slightly, and he smiled and said, “It’s fine to draw a perfect ending.”
She didn’t want everyone to misunderstand Meng Wanji.
It has been a long time since they walked together so closely. The two walked on the campus avenue leading to the dormitory with a short distance.
Sheng Jinshu suddenly told: “I have something to do at home, I want to take a short vacation to go back to deal with it, starting from tomorrow, it will take about a week.”
Meng Wanji was surprised: “So suddenly?”
“Yeah.” Sheng Jinshu replied: “Please take a good leave. I will take the kitten to Senior Sister in the evening and let her raise it together first.” It is convenient to take away, and is temporarily raised by Meng Wanji and Sheng Jinshu.
Meng Wanji’s heart was suddenly empty again, as if the last connection was cut off by Sheng Jinshu.
But there doesn’t seem to be anything to criticize. Sheng Jinshu takes care of the kitten most of the time. It’s normal for her to worry or not want to trouble her.
She nodded, indicating that she understood.
Sheng Jinshu didn’t speak anymore, the atmosphere was surprisingly quiet.
After walking for a long time, it was almost time to reach the dormitory, and Sheng Jinshu said again: “What do you want to do after you resign?”
Meng Wanji didn’t hide it: “Let’s take the postgraduate entrance examination.” At the age of 28, it seemed a little late, but she felt it was not too late.
“Test screenwriter?”
“Um.”
Sheng Jinshu’s red lips curled, revealing a bright smile, looking very happy for her: “You can definitely do it.”
Meng Wanji had not looked at her like this for many days, nor had she seen such a smile.
She froze for a moment, and politely replied: “I borrow your good words.” After a pause, she added: “Your affairs will also go well.”
Sheng Jinshu smiled and stood beside the dormitory building: “You go up, I won’t go up, just go back.”
“Okay.” Meng Wanji turned around.
She walked into the dormitory building as if nothing had happened, stepping in the light, but it was as if she had walked into the darkness. She turned sideways in embarrassment, allowing herself to take another look at Sheng Jinshu’s back.
Unexpectedly, Sheng Jinshu was still looking at her before she left.
Her eyes were silent, meeting hers, stunned for a moment, and then showed a soft look. The night wind ruffled her long curly hair and long dress, and Meng Wanji had the illusion that she would be blown away by the wind in the next second.
She wanted to go up and hug her desperately, no matter tomorrow or later, but she didn’t.
Neither did Sheng Jinshu.
She waved at her, smiled faintly, turned her back to her, and walked sparsely into the vast darkness.