Hazel In The - Chapter 40

It appeared that talking Will out of liking her wasn’t going to work. So now what?

The only thing Hazel could think of was telling him about Billy. He needed to know what he was getting into so he wouldn’t get his hopes up. Come to think of it, she hadn’t mentioned anything about him aside from when they first met.

All Will knew about the one she loved was that he was an important childhood friend and her ex-fiancé had pretended to be him. If he liked her, he should know what he was up against.

“You knew when you agreed to marry me that I was in love with someone else. Did you really think I would change my mind so quickly?” she asked.

Hazel felt him shrug since his arms were still around her. “A guy can hope. What’s so great about him anyway?”

“I lost my family when I was little and ended up unable to speak for several years from the trauma,” she found herself admitting. “He was the only one who cared about me during that time. And later on, he saved my life. Not only am I alive now because of him, the person I am today is entirely due to his influence on me.”

Will went silent for a few minutes after that, still caging her in his arms. How long had they been sitting here like this, anyway? The movie had been long forgotten in the background.

When he finally did make a noise, it was a low whistle. His tone was oddly cheerful considering she just told him why she was in love with another man.

“Sounds like you care about this guy an awful lot.”

Hazel sighed. “I do but it’s pointless. He forgot about me even after promising he would come find me if we ever got separated. He might not even be alive anymore. It’s been sixteen years since I last saw him.

“I wasn’t really upset about Billy cheating on me, you know. I was upset to find out that the man I thought he was hadn’t kept his promise after all. After that I didn’t see the point of waiting anymore, which is why I lost my head and proposed to the entire bar.”

“I find it hard to believe that someone as dedicated as you couldn’t see the point of waiting anymore when you had already done so much waiting. What really made you change your mind?” Will asked.

Hazel’s faith in Billy had never been shaken before then. She waited patiently for ten years, believing he would come back. Then Billy Lawson showed up and she thought he did, further confirming her belief in Billy.

Finding out the truth had been devastating. She didn’t want to believe that the one thing she clung to all those years—faith in Billy—had been wrong. It was easier to believe he was dead than that he had truly forgotten the promise that was her main reason to keep living.

“I believed in him too much,” she confessed, unsure why she was actually answering such personal questions.

“I was so sure he would keep his promise that the very thought of him not doing it threatened to destroy me. It’s easier to believe he’s dead than that he would forget me. We were separated after he dragged me out of a burning building. I looked but never found a trace of him until that imposter showed up.”

Hazel thought she was entirely detached from it all at this point. She was used to suppressing her emotions. So why did a few stubborn tears escape anyway?

Her emotions were all twisted up inside. Guilt because she couldn’t like Will back even though he was here. Grief at losing the only person who ever mattered to her. Anger at Billy Lawson’s deception. And to be perfectly honest, at her Billy as well.

How dare he make promises he wasn’t able to keep? Even if he had died in the fire…he still promised. If he hadn’t, it was even worse. Because that meant he was a liar too.

“Hazel, I…” Will trailed off, as if unsure what to say.

She couldn’t blame him; she had dumped a lot of emotional baggage on him.

“I told you I was crazy,” she said with a pitiful little laugh as she wiped at her eyes.

He leaned forward and rested his head on her shoulder. His cheek against her neck felt very warm but not unpleasant. Maybe right now she could use some warmth.

“I don’t think you’re crazy. But…what would you do if you did meet this guy again?”

Hazel frowned. Did he think she was going to ditch him in favor of her first love? What kind of question was that? Wuxiaworld for visiting.

She wasn’t as naïve as she was when she met Billy Lawson. She would require absolute proof that whoever claimed to be Billy actually was who he said he was. Something that only Billy would remember.

After that…even she wasn’t sure. Part of her wanted to say she would go with him immediately. He was the reason she was still here, after all. He was the only person in the world she truly cared about.

That being said, Hazel might care about Will a teeny bit too. Because she didn’t want to hurt his feelings. Normally she didn’t give much thought to things like that. Loneliness makes you selfish.

Not only did she not want to hurt his feelings, if Billy was still alive and happened to run into her someday it meant he really had forgotten their promise. The very thought made her angry. Her only belief for so many years couldn’t be a lie.

But what if he had wanted to find her sooner but it just took a long time? Things happened, and they hadn’t even known each other’s last names. What if he had been looking for her this whole time? She would have to go with him then.

“I think I would ask him what he was doing for sixteen years that kept him away from me,” Hazel said eventually.

It wasn’t a real answer. Will probably wanted to know if she would leave him if Billy ever showed up. The problem was, she really didn’t know. It would entirely depend on the situation.

She was a loyal person so trying to decide between being loyal to her husband or her only love would likely drive her insane. If he really did come back…she hoped she wouldn’t have to make that kind of choice.

Will lifted his head slightly from where it was resting on her shoulder. “…you really trust him, don’t you?”

“Yes. Does that bother you?” Hazel asked, slightly curious.

“No,” he said convincingly. “I knew what I was getting into when I married you. Still, I do hope you’ll continue being nice to me even though you know I like you.”

His words confused her. At first she was a bit mad. What kind of person did he think she was? Why would she be mean to him after all the kindness he had showed her?

Then she realized that wasn’t what he meant. He didn’t want things to become awkward between them; he wanted her to keep treating him the way she had been.

Hazel honestly wasn’t sure she would be able to do that, at least at first. Couldn’t she have a little time to process things? Finding out someone you’re living with likes you is kind of a big deal!