Heather the Necromancer - Book 6: Chapter 39: Changed forever

A slight breeze ruffled the golden hair that hung around a set of delicately curved white horns. A long rope-like tail slowly swayed as if it had a mind of its own while its owner fixated on her contemplation. Heather stood at the railing of a grand balcony set on the side of their floating palace. From here she could look down on all of Paradise city and admire the achievement of what they had built.

Hundreds of players now crawled through the streets and surrounding countryside, seeking fortunes and adventure. The guild was busy with challenges and quests, many of which sent them to Quinny’s forest or the graveyard. Heather was pleased by the overwhelmingly positive response to allowing monster players to establish lairs nearby. People flocked to Quinny’s forest for her special events and hidden adventures, while the more brave and daring delved into the depths of Frank’s tunnels. Even the small dungeon under the city had a dozen players in it at all times, as people did what they were supposed to do and had fun.

There were still a few sour apples who balked at the idea that goblins and other monster players were welcome in the city. She had even had a small incident where a low-level paladin attempted to kill one of her undead guards. It ended poorly for the man but served as a good lesson. This city was open to all to play, hero and monster players included.

It was all coming together and building into something special then a ghost from her past wandered in. The woman known as Moon had come to the city, quietly asking about Princess Hannah. Through a clever ruse, Heather managed to confront the woman without her knowing who it was. She learned that Moon was looking for another way to kidnap her and turn her in for the bounty.

Her presence was a reminder that Heather was never truly safe and quite a few people knew about her secret. Moon’s presence jeopardized everything they had built, and sooner or later, Moon would make a move. It was a matter of grave importance that had to be dealt with, but it wasn’t what troubled Heather at this moment. With a sigh, she closed her eyes and thought back to her dream the night before and what happened that changed her forever.

Her dream had been one of her own until suddenly it changed, and she found herself in a room with Jaina and Gisley. The two claimed to be the actual women and informed Heather that part of Gisley’s power as a lunar fairy was the ability to give people good dreams. Heather had been confused as to why they felt they needed to share that until they explained that Gisley was why she was having such good dreams. They told her that the glitter bombs she so enjoyed drinking were named that because they were laced with fairy glitter. By drinking them, Heather was putting herself under a spell that allowed Gisley to see her dreams when she slept. Gisley had routinely manipulated them so that Heather always had dreams where she and Frank made love.

It seemed harmless enough; after all, it was all just a dream, but then they admitted that they could watch, and Gisley sometimes did. She felt a bit embarrassed that Gisley had been watching her make love to Frank but still dismissed it as harmless. However, this was the perfect opportunity to talk to Jaina about something that had been deeply bothering her.

A few nights ago, she and Jaina had shared a proper kiss while the others watched. Heather only did it under extreme duress, but it stirred something inside. Jaina then instructed her to give a decision she had been agonizing over to Frank, and he made it for her. There was a power in that moment when he took charge and chose the Lilim class for her, sending electricity coursing through her veins. She didn’t have any words to describe what she was feeling, but she desperately wanted to feel it again. She shared all this with Jaina, and the woman insisted Heather was feeling what it felt like to submit. Jaina said she felt this feeling all the time and then, on a whim, asked Heather if she would like to feel it again.

She should have said no, but she was enticed and couldn’t help herself. Jaina then presented her with several very arousing scenarios, all of which Heather denied. Then she offered one very simple option to recreate that night at the inn and start over from the kiss. Heather’s insides churned to think about it, and it grew even more intense when Gisley offered to put Frank into the dream. It would be the real Frank, but he would not be aware it was a dream being manipulated. All Heather had to do was recreate the kiss with Jaina, then ask Frank if he wanted to see more.

It was such a tantalizing idea, and it set her heart racing. What would Frank say? How would he react? Gisley assured her that since it was a dream, he would be more pliable and prone to do things he wouldn’t normally do. She didn’t know why, but she agreed to the setup and before she knew it she was kissing Jaina. Her blood ran hot as the tension mounted while everybody watched the kiss. Then her moment came when she had to turn to Frank and ask if he would like to see more.

His response meant Heather and Jaina spent what seemed like hours making love while Frank watched. It reached its culmination when she lost herself to the passion, and Frank was drawn in to participate.

She tried to tell herself it was just a dream and didn’t mean anything, but that had been the real Jaina, and she would remember. She tried to say it still didn’t matter, as dreams didn’t count. But if they were both aware it was a dream and they went on with it anyway, wasn’t that the same as doing it for real? Who could say that New Eden wasn’t just a dream and anything they did here didn’t matter? If it mattered here, it had to matter in the dream and that thought haunted her. However, that wasn’t the source of the terrible guilt that gripped her heart. In fact, that dream had opened her eyes to an even larger problem that she could no longer deny.

She had stood alone at the railing for the last three hours trying to sort her thoughts when a dark-haired woman appeared at her side. The woman quietly took her place beside Heather, looking out over the city while she twisted in knots. Heather didn’t need to look up to know it was Jaina, and her presence here could only mean one thing. She, too, was having an inner conflict and had come to try and sort the chaos out. Heather desperately wanted to speak with her but didn’t know how to begin. Thankfully, Jaina became nervous when the silence went on too long and broke the ice with a harmless comment.

“They tell me you want to be alone,” Jaina said as she stood at the railing. “I will go if you want me to.”

There was a pain in her voice. A sense of worry that something might be terribly wrong. Heather knew that remaining silent would only increase her anxiety, but she still couldn’t find the words. She needed to show Jaina she wasn’t angry, so she took her hand to ensure she remained.

She knew they needed to have this conversation, especially considering what had happened between them. It wasn’t so much the sex that made it powerful, it was the fact that Frank had commanded her to do it. He had reacted as if she was his sex slave and demanded she perform for him. He even went as far as to demand Jaina and Heather become lovers, seeking each other’s affection often.

Those words sent her heart racing, and she felt that overwhelming power of submission. It was like a drug coursing through her veins, consuming her rational mind and leaving her dazed. To Frank, it was only a dream, and he had no idea it was being manipulated. He woke up and dismissed what happened without a word, going on with his life, ignorant that Heather knew.

She wondered if men had dreams like that often. Certainly, they had erotic dreams, as several of her past boyfriends attested to. It was probably rather tame and harmless from Frank’s point of view, so no wonder he paid it no mind. Heather, on the other hand, woke up with her body trembling as echoes of the passion faded. She had been taken to a whole new level of being and found disconnecting from the feeling difficult. The moment had been passionate and beautiful as she and Jaina came together with a hunger she hadn’t shown the others. That point stuck in her mind as she looked across the bed at her other wives. They all desperately sought her affection, so why hadn’t she made love to them like that? Why was she feeling so guilty that her family hadn’t been the ones she showed that much passion to?

Now Jaina was here desperately waiting for Heather to respond. Heather thought back to the dream and the point where Jaina had tried to back out. She admitted to loving Heather but was afraid that this would damage their relationship. Jaina had vowed never to forgive herself if Heather woke up with regrets. Heather should have let it end right then and there, but something implored her to go on. Something deep inside cried out and said that if she turned back now, she was the one who would never forgive herself.

“I’m sorry,” Jaina said without looking at Heather.

Heather glanced her way to see trembling eyes full of pain as crustal blue tears rolled down her cheeks. She was being torn to shreds inside over what happened, and Heather couldn’t take it anymore.

“You don’t need to be sorry,” Heather replied and rubbed the back of her hand. “You did me a favor.”

“I don’t see how,” Jaina cried and looked down. “I should never have put you in that position. I put my own desires ahead of your well-being.”

“No, you made me understand something about myself,” Heather said, squeezing her hand. “I am a greedy person, and I abuse my relationships. I made love to you with an energy and need I haven’t shown the others. All this time we have been together, and I haven’t shown them half as much passion. I am a terrible persona and don’t deserve Quinny, Breanne, and Umtha.

“Don’t say that,” Jaina argued. “You are a wonderful person. That’s why I find you so irresistible.”

“Everyone keeps making excuses for me,” Heather sighed as she thought of how often it happened. “But in the end, I am always the one who needs to apologize. First, I need to find them and tell them what happened. Then I need to make love to them with the same passion I showed you. I can’t keep pretending we are this big happy family when I only share my affection with Frank.”

“Sweetheart, they all know you are more focused on men,” Jaina said. “Quinny even told me she knows you will warm up to it soon.”

“It needs to happen now,” Heather said, looking at Jaina. “I need to prove it to myself.”

“Why would you need to prove anything to yourself?” Jaina asked, unsure what Heather was getting at.

“Because I worry that I am not a good person,” Heather explained as her eyes trembled. “I know that I used to be somebody else, somebody violent. Whoever I was, I had lovers scattered all over the world, and I kept them secret from one another. We know about Umtha and Viylah, but how many more are out there still waiting to be discovered? Why don’t they know about each other, and what lies did I tell them as I ran off to find more?”

“Hannah, don’t confuse what you were with what you are,” Jaina begged. “Besides, we don’t know the circumstances of why you had those lovers.”

“What kind of woman has multiple lovers who know nothing about each other?” Heather asked flatly. “The only answer is the kind of woman who doesn’t care and abuses those around her. I keep doing that to the people I claim are my lovers. Am I really any better?”

“Just stop,” Jaina insisted, turning as more tears ran down her cheeks. “I am crying because you are the most special person I have ever had the pleasure of making love to, and I am terrified I hurt you. I will always treasure that memory as one of the happiest of my life, and I can’t stand to know you don’t feel the same way. How could a woman who evokes those feelings in me be the monster you claim she is? Besides, your current relationship is nothing like the secretive nonsense from before. Your lovers know about each other, and you have kept nothing from them.”

“Except you,” Heather replied and turned back to the city.

“Hannah,” Jaina said in a nervous voice. “We will just say it was a dream and will never happen again.”

“No,” Heather replied and squeezed her hand. “I don’t want it to never happen again. In a way, I am glad it happened because now I realize what I need to do for the others. I can’t just be their partner and occasionally hold hands. I need to open up and show them how much I love them.” She paused and turned to Jaina with a faint smile on her face. “And I need you to help me. I need you to teach me how to be a good lover to my wives and my girlfriend.”

“Did you just call me your girlfriend and mean it?” Jaina panted as her lips trembled.

“I did,” Heather replied and leaned in close before joining their lips in a kiss. She heard Jaina crying through the kiss and when she stepped back, the woman’s tears had renewed. Heather brushed her cheek clear and smiled before taking her hand again and looking over the city. “But what happened with Frank was just a dream.”

“Oh, I agree, that was only a dream,” Jaina laughed and let out a long sigh.

“Feel better?” Heather asked, grateful that her humor had made Jaina laugh.

“I was terrified you were going to hate me,” Jaina said. “I came to find you, and Breanne told me you had been distant all morning and wanted to be alone. I was sure that meant you had been hurt, and I was to blame.”

“Well, you gave me a lot to think about. And you know how much I like to overthink things,” Heather said.

“I should have thought of that,” Jaina said. “But I have never met a woman like you. You are deeply intelligent and careful in your thoughts, yet you can make impulsive decisions.”

“I call that the I am tired of trying to figure it out course of action,” Heather said. “If I can’t reason something through I just act and see what happens. I hate being stuck on a problem for too long.”

“Because you think about it so much,” Jaina nodded. “Does it ever tire you?”

“Everything tires me now,” Heather replied as she tried to contain the vast scope of her worries. “I can’t even be sure I am who I think I am, or that the memories I have now are my own. Every time I make a decision, I question why I made it. Is this part of me that I can’t remember or something of this new iteration of myself?”

“I can see where that could be frustrating,” Jaina agreed.

“It drives me crazy to the extent that I try to keep my mind busy on other things,” Heather explained, turning to Jaina again. “But then you helped me find a solution.”

“I did? How?” Jaina asked as Heather smiled even wide.

“By encouraging me to submit and give one of those decisions to Frank. I can’t explain how relieved I was to hand that over to him and how exciting it was when he made the choice. It took something I had been agonizing over for days out of my head and solved it in seconds.”

“Oh, my goodness,” Jaina cried. “Hannah, I hadn’t even taken that into consideration. All those confusing thoughts and the constant struggle to make sense of this past lives nonsense. You must be under a terrible strain trying to manage it all. I just thought you found submitting to be as exciting as I do, but to you, it must be a tremendous relief. To give those worries over to somebody else and be free from the burden.”

“It really is a relief,” Heather replied with a nod. “And I am giving serious consideration to becoming a proper slave girl. I know Frank would never abuse the control, and I love being his princess. He also loves caring for me, and I would finally be free of so much confusion.”

“I feel a but coming here?” Jaina asked.

“Of course, there is a but,” Heather sighed and lifted her arm. “I found this the other day.” She rubbed her tattoo and brought up her panel so Jaina could see the display. She then took her into the Lilim class and down the abilities list to the power she got at level fifty. Jaina was shocked to see that Heather could summon a slave collar, but hers was called a masters band. It looked different, too, with dark leather and red ruby hearts around the center with three sturdy metal rings.

“You can summon a slave collar?” Jaina gasped.

“Yep,” Heather sighed. “It would appear the Lilim can take somebody to be her sex slave.”

“Well, that kind of makes sense,” Jaina said. “I mean, you are essentially a queen of succubi.”

“I get bonuses if the slave I take is a succubus,” Heather said. “I can even cast my spells and buffs through them.”

“Oh, wow,” Jaina exclaimed.

“Yeah, so I finally realize I might want to submit fully, and I discover I am the one people are supposed to be submitting to,” Heather said.

“Oh, you have nothing to worry about,” Jaina said. “Look at Rajeen and how her harem works.”

“What do you mean?” Heather asked.

“Do you think she can collar all those girls herself?” Jaina laughed. “No, she used her collars to collar women who could take slaves. She then had them collar others who could and then on down.”

“So, some of Rajeen’s slaves are slave masters?” Heather asked.

“Of course they are,” Jaina laughed. “And every slave they take becomes the property of their master. They all belong to Rajeen, but some of them not directly.”

“I had no idea,” Heather said as she pondered an idea. If only Frank would take the evolution that allowed him to make collars, he could collar her, and she another. Her mind began to work on how the chain would work until Jaina nudged her side.

“Overthinking it?” Jaina asked.

“Always,” Heather sighed and shook her head. “I was trying to decide who to collar.”

“Oh, do you have a list in mind?” Jaina teased.

Heather smiled and turned on Jaina with a sultry look. “If I could collar anyone I wanted, I would collar you.”

“Me?” Jaina gasped.

“I am not going to hide it; I love you,” Heather whispered. “And I wish we could be together.”

“Oh, sweetheart,” Jaina said and leaned into her shoulder. “I wish that too. If Roric ever gets bored of me, I will ask him to sell me to you.”

Heather found that thought funny and started to laugh as Jaina joined her. Together they held hands and looked out over the city standing side by side as friends.

“So does this mean we get to make love again?” Jaina asked.

“Yes, but only after I have fixed things,” Heather said. “I need to show Quinny, Breanne, and Umtha the same kind of love I showed you. Building a relationship with you isn’t fair when I am not done building one with them. They also need to know about what happened in the dream. They need to forgive me and give me permission to continue this, especially Frank.”

“I fully understand,” Jaina agreed. “But uh, there is one more thing.”

“What’s that?” Heather asked.

“Would it be too much to ask you to love Chandice too?” Jaina begged. “She is my official girlfriend and I share everyone with her. It would hurt her feelings terribly if we had a close relationship and she wasn’t included.”

“Ha, I have to love your girlfriend as well?” Heather giggled.

“Maybe just a little?” Jaina pleaded.

“I don’t really do things by a little,” Heather stated. “But I like Chandice and wouldn’t mind spending more time with her. If she wants to be a part of our relationship, I will love her just as much as I love you, but only after my current family is firmly established,” Heather stated.

“Right, they have to come first. I perfectly understand,” Jaina said with a pleased nod, then looked out over the city. “You built a beautiful land here. People love being here.”

“Most of this was Frank,” Heather said as she recalled fond memories of her early days with Frank. “He loves to build things. When I first met him, he told me all about the graveyard he wanted to build. He could describe everything like he had seen it a hundred times and had this boyish enthusiasm. It’s part of what I love about him that desire to create. But he put all that on hold for me and followed me all over the world, trying to help me escape it.”

“He was always hoping you would stay,” Jaina said. “He might not have said it, but you can tell, he wanted you to stay with him.”

“I know,” Heather said as she looked at Jaina. “And I have never been more happy. I love him, and I want him to have all his dreams. Even the harem he tries to pretend he doesn’t need.”

“Ha, I can tell he enjoys it,” Jaina agreed. “And now he has his harem and a whole kingdom to build with.”

“And it’s all in jeopardy because of Moon,” Heather said.

“I assume you told Gwen,” Jaina stated.

Heather nodded and thought back to the fiery response when she told Gwen about Moon. Her mother wasn’t pleased to know an enemy who knew Heather’s secret was about, but she congratulated Heather on her clever ruse. Moon was now being followed by Rajeen, the rogues, and Gwen’s own personal spies. If the woman so much as whispered the word necromancer, she would be quickly dealt with.

Heather felt more relaxed that her mother was dealing with the situation and took comfort in her mother’s assurances. She was reminded that the local kings and Queens had personally tested her. Thanks to the accident with the figurine, she had proven she wasn’t a chosen and thus could not be the necromancer people were looking for. They would be strong testimony against any rumor started by Moon or any other, but Heather hated the idea of her name being tarnished. Not to mention there were always people who would believe things by an accusation alone, and they could cause trouble.

“My mother said she will deal with Moon,” Heather replied.

“Good, one less thing for you to worry about,” Jaina said.

“You know I am going to worry about it anyway,” Heather replied. “I just don’t want this perfect home to be threatened. Sometimes I think I should go ahead and reset. Then I could ditch the necromancer class and pick something else.”

“But isn’t it hard for a chosen to reset?” Jaina asked.

“You have to enter a death loop,” Heather replied. “Where you die moments after you respawn enough times that the system detects the problem and resets you.”

“So somebody would have to stand in the spawn and keep killing you,” Jaina said.

“Yes,” Heather sighed. “I know if I asked Frank to do it, he would. He loves me so much he would do anything for me, even that.”

“If you seriously wanted to reset, I am sure Roric would let us use Gisley to put you to sleep for the deaths,” Jaina said. “But I would dread the process. We all love you.”

“I wish there were some other way for you to leave this class behind,” Jaina said.

“You know, Blackbast offered to collar me and keep me at her temple,” Heather replied. “With her collar locked, I could barely access the class, and nobody would ever look for me. I nearly said yes, but it meant saying goodbye to Frank, and I couldn’t do it. I guess I was falling in love with him even back then and losing the will to leave him.” Heather had to stop to wipe her eyes as Jaina’s arm came around her back. The two stood in silence, watching the city go about its day until Heather had control of herself.

“I’m sorry. I can’t believe how long it took me to realize how much I love him,” Heather said.

“You were in translation shock,” Jaina said. “They make people train for months for this and put you through rigorous psychological conditioning to prepare you for the change. This is a one-way trip, and if you’re not ready for the drastic change of reality, it hits you hard.”

“I never wanted to be here,” Heather cried as she shook her head. “And now I find out I have been here a dozen times before, and all of them ended badly.”

“You don’t know it was a dozen times,” Jaina cut in, desperate to help her lover. “And you also don’t know they ended badly. All you know is a few fragments of the previous life, and it sounds to me that you were a woman determined to make a difference.”

“I started two wars and may be responsible for thousands of players never respawning,” Heather countered.

“If I recall what Umtha once told us, you promised to rescue the goblins and get them home. You also learned that the visitors offered you a chance to leave, but you refused to leave them behind. You made a promise to a group of people you owed nothing to, and you refused to break it. I know you think the scattered lover’s thing means you were an abuser, but never forget, you refused to turn your back on Umtha and the goblins. You were loyal to your own detriment and that is something very few good people can claim.

“Hmm, I hadn’t thought of that,” Heather said.

“That’s because you have too much to think about,” Jaina said, and she hugged her tightly. “You should tell Frank you want to be a slave girl, then let him and Blackbast worry about everything. You can spend your time laying in the harem with me and your other lovers with nothing to worry about but who to kiss next.”

“You make it all sound so attractive,” Heather laughed as she tried to picture herself in Rajeen’s harem lounging among the girls.

“It might be the perfect life for you,” Jaina said. “You would be free from all the worry and you could feel that sense of submission night and day.”

“Please don’t tempt me with that again. That’s how I got into trouble last night,” Heather replied with a smirk.

“But it was such a fun dream,” Jaina teased. “And we can set the scene any way you want. If you have a place you want to visit, or a location to set the mood, all you have to do is imagine it, and Gisley can recreate it.”

“So we can go anywhere I can imagine?” Heather asked as something tickled at the back of her mind. It was an idea or a concept, but it evaded her until Jaina elaborated on how it worked.

“If you want to make love on the beach, or a remote garden, or a frozen ice sheet, all you have to do is see it in your mind,” Jaina explained. “The dreams flow according to what you expect, and Gisley can make your intentional thoughts appear.”

“Hmm,” Heather said, then froze as the tickling suddenly turned into a thunderstorm. Gisley could recreate anything Heather saw in her mind, which meant she could go back! “I know exactly where I want to go!” Heather stated as the idea came rushing into her thoughts and she saw the place she desperately wanted to go. “And I want everyone to come with me!”