Hold My Hand Dont Let Me Go - Chapter 19

Jonathan stares through his window at the red luxurious car that flew as if it was being chased by someone. He had braced himself to encounter Samantha the moment she woke up, but he got a little shock when she didn’t do anything that he was expecting for her to do.

Instead, she ignored his presence and left without even seeing him. He grab the cup of coffee that was situated on his bed side table. A wondering thought occupying his mind.

“Something is wrong” he whispers unto himself.

Last night, he has barely slept a wink.

First, he tried to justify why he didn’t left and instead lied to his girlfriend just so he can stay the night in Samantha’s house. In the end, he was left with no choice but to acknowledge that he felt guilty for embarrassing Samantha on their wedding day that caused her to cry so tragically last night.

Second, the scene of Samantha clutching her heart and gasping for air while asking him for help kept appearing on his dream. Whenever he remembers the way her eyes stares back at him that time, he couldn’t help but felt a chill.

She looked at him as if she hated him deep in her bones, but also longs for him the most.

He had saw her looked at him that same way one time, the day after their wedding where she stood in the middle of a dilapidated room with shards all around her. She called his name once before she looses her consciousness. As if by reflex, he rushed towards her and catches her body before it touched the broken glass filled floor, unknowingly, injuring his feet in the process.

While he was checking Samantha’s state, her eyes meekly opens and she raised her hands to caress his cheeks.

“H-how could you.. d-do that to me..? L-liar” she said almost in a whisper. A tear falling in her eyes as she once again falls into a deep slumber.

That time, Jonathan dismissed what happened because everyone around him was panicking with what they saw. Not long after, Samantha’s and his mother came in tears. Immediately grabbing the sleeping woman in his arms into theirs, they we’re so worried and mad about her state of health that they couldn’t help but chorus into lecturing him.

At first he just stood on the side and silently took all the criticisms that they pour on him, but when Yasmin’s name started to come up. He got so mad that he stormed off and completely forgot about what Samantha said.

Now that he’s in his right state of mind. He couldn’t help but be bothered by the way Samantha looks at him that day and about what she said.

Why does it seems like he was in the wrong, when Samantha was the one who left him and is still trying to sabotage his relationship with the woman he loves? Why does it feels like he was the one who made a huge sin towards her? Why does he felt so guilty?

Whatever he’s feeling. Jonathan, isn’t sure either.