How to Avoid Debut - Chapter 5

Thank you Rhavaniel for the kofi~!

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As soon as we arrived, Joon stopped and opened his mouth. The dazzling light on the ceiling was an art. It was more ornately decorated than I expected, so it was a little burdensome.

“5 minutes left before we start filming.”

When I saw the people busily moving around the big stage, my back became stiffer. I felt like my body was full of strength, but I couldn’t stay comfortably.

The MC, who was a famous idol, smiled in front of me to relieve my nervousness, but when I saw his face, my nervousness doubled. When I saw the face that I had only seen on the TV right in front of my face, my sense of reality gradually faded. I don’t even know in what mind I was in to keep on sitting here.

The sitting arrangement was already set so I parted with Jigu and Joon for a while. The two were having a conversation at the far end to see if their seats were close enough. The image of the two whispering with Joon unilaterally asking questions and Jigu answering with an expressionless face could not be seen.

In the center, there was a huge stage with numerous cameras, and right in front of it were chairs for the participants to sit. There’s a total of 33 chairs, 11 per row, occupying a really large space.

“Hello,  please take care of me.”

“Aah, yes. Me too.”

I was sitting in dazed and was looking straight ahead, but I was awakened by a greeting from a participant who was sitting in front and was looking back. I slightly held his hand and bowed, the people around me seemed to be busy saying hello. There were sudden greetings from every direction and we frantically shook hands. We eventually exhausted all our energy to be nervous.

It’s been a long time since I’ve been around many people so I needlessly moved my body a few times, but the person next to me thought that I was uncomfortable and moved his seat  slightly to the side. Ah he didn’t need to do that.

“It’s not a live broadcast , so everyone relax! If you make a mistake you can just cut it off and do it again.”

The main PD, who was seated at the center, said to relax then shouted stand-by right after. My saliva went down to my dry throat. I can’t help but be nervous if you shout stand-by after telling us to relax.

“I will now start the countdown.”

I’m not desperate for a debut but I’m this nervous, I wonder how nervous the others are. They’ll be fiercely competing to get the camera’s attention, even if it’s little. The moment when I was thinking that I couldn’t do it even if I die, I heard the sound of the filming starting.

The MC led the first performer with a prepared comment and the large camera hanging in the air, accurately illuminated this side. This is a lot more nerve wracking that  thought.

“We will now start with the first stage.”

At the same time as the signal, the first participant came up on the stage. Whatever he’ll do,being the first was an important position because it will draw a lot of attention. Of course, I expected someone who can do it well. A person with gorgeous hair color went into the center of the stage with his hands raised. It was that person. Kim Seongwun.

“Since he was a trainee, he will probably do well.”

“He’s not someone who has only done this once or twice…”

Maybe they’ve gotten closer after the brief greetings earlier, I can clearly hear the two people on my right talking. The camera went back and forth in front of me and zoomed in to the two people who were talking about Seongwun.

“Please start the music.”

Seongwon, who confidently requested accompaniment, began to move flexibly. He chose good pop songs and his skills were good. He had a good sense for dancing, and his singing was stable.

He’s dancing while also singing. I’m sure he has heard that we can do just one out of the two, but it was clear that he was able to prepare both. In fact, he’s actually talented.

“He’s really good.”

“As expected, an experienced person is different.”

Words about his performance can be heard from here and there. Even if I didn’t listen carefully, I could easily tell that everything was good. The MC also gave more compliments with a bright expression.

From what I heard from my uncle, the MC would not say whether it was good or bad. Even so, it was clear that the stage a while ago had a high level of perfection, and no one would openly speak if a stage was lacking.

“Thank you!”

… Then when it was the number 15 or 17,  I couldn’t even properly count nor hear the people talking around me anymore. The drowsiness came over and I was so tired that I wanted to run out of the set right away. I should’ve slept a little longer.

At first, I was immersed in the dance and music that I hadn’t seen in a long time and enjoyed the stage,but I got tired of it because it was repeated over and over again. Other participants did not seem to have changed much, but they certainly spoke much less than they did at first.

But that was it. No one showed signs of dozing off or relaxing, and they would constantly touch their hairs then ask the person next to them if their face still looked okay.

My turn is number 27. My uncle said that he carefully chose this order. It was the perfect time when they will be completely exhausted and drowsy that they won’t even remember.

‘I think there’s still 10 people left.’

It takes about 6-7 minutes for one person to come down from the stage and the next person to go up. In conclusion, it meant that we had been doing this for almost two hours.Fortunately, there was no one who made a mistake, so there was no such thing as cutting it off.

“Hello.”

A man with orange hair grunted and dragged a chair up the stage. It seems like a performance using a chair. The image of him grabbing the microphone while flipping his hair that flowed down his forehead disappeared from my sight for a moment and then came back. I was dozing off.

“… Why did you do tha…”

I think the singing was pretty good, but his voice started to fade away. I’m screwed. I shouldn’t fall asleep.

I tried to put strength in my eyes and resist falling asleep, but my mental strength wasn’t great enough to survive more than ten stages.

Eventually, I opened my eyes.

“Why are you not coming out, number 27?”

It was when I heard the PD’s voice, looked around, and the kind person next to me found me asleep and woke me up with a tap.

“Are you perhaps the number 27…?”

“.. Ah, yes. Yes.”

When I finally opened my eyes, the bright light that blind me in the morning… What morning, why is morning here?

F*ck, as soon as I understood the situation, a curse came out. Of course, only inwardly, and outwardly, I stood up calmly. I don’t even know if I woke up before my performance. All the participants and PD-nim were looking my way.

“I’m sorry. It’s me.”

“Come down quickly and get ready.”

If it had been another participant, it would have been a situation where they would be terrified of falling asleep during filming, but the PD-nim’s reaction was smooth as if he had heard the words from my uncle standing right next to him. It wasn’t a live broadcast and I’m just a substitute so I went down to the stage thinking that they would just let me slide. To cover up the fact that I fell deeply asleep during the filming, I couldn’t even move sluggishly.

“…”

As soon as I faced the 32 participants sitting in front of me, the nervousness that had died down, crept up. They’re not even the judge, so why are they looking at me like that? Maybe it was because I fell asleep. I couldn’t even rub my eye because I have eye makeup on, so I just fixed my hair a few times and came up, but I’m a little scared because I’m worried about my appearance. There’s no mark of saliva, right. If there was, then my uncle would have given me a sign.

“Tell me when you are ready.”

The PD was kind enough to give me time to prepare, but I couldn’t use it. I’m not in the situation where I should take those words straight and take my time to calm my body and mind. So, in the end, I slowly breathed once and gave an affirmative answer right away.

“I’m ready.”

When I looked at the camera in front of me with an expressionless face, exactly 5 seconds later, the mp3 file I had delivered to my uncle started playing.

It’s been a long time since I have sobered up, and contrary to my worries, my body moved freely. I wondered if I would forget the choreography because of my nervousness,but it turns out to be an unnecessary worry. Time is medicine, but it was more effective than I thought.

The cameras, one at a time before and after the stage, followed steadily from one place to the other, and only when the music ended did they stop as well. After the polite applause and greetings to the camera, my job was completely done. I was trembling. Because of the thrill rather than the nervousness.

“Wow, the dancing was really… I now know what it means to be alive and breathing.”

Almost 10 years of experience, I greeted the MC, who applauded and praised me, with hands full of years of experience,and quickly ran to my seat.

Lying on the soft chair, I pledged not to fall asleep again from now on, and I turned my head to the side and saw my uncle.

‘Well done!’

He was holding his thumb up and shouting passionately with the shape of his mouth. Uncle, if you put your hand up like that, we can see your belly, but since it’s impossible to communicate for a long time, I just roughly nodded and gave a thumbs up as well.  I thought the participants next to me would see it, so I bowed my head back and peeked.

“Number 28, please come out.”

“Number 29?”

“Number 30, please get ready.”

Maybe it was because I was surrounded by a cold atmosphere, but I couldn’t sleep anymore. My eyes were so clear that I wouldn’t fall asleep even if someone forced me to sleep, and thanks to that, I was able to properly watch the rest of the performances. After a continuous applause without any words, it was the number 30’s turn.

“Come down number 31.”

“Yes.”

The person who raised his hand to answer the PD-nim, who was looking for number 31, was Jigu. I got lost for a moment and when I came to his senses, the accompaniment was already playing. He looked natural as he sat on the chair and held a mic in his right hand.

It was the first calming ballad I heard. Just with his voice, he was able to exactly infer the truth in the moment. The song with a well-matched atmosphere matched his soft voice perfectly. I was slightly mesmerized by his singing that I liked. The sensibility of the 19-year-old was heavy.

“Thank you.”

Jigu, who continued to sing while making eye contact with the camera with a sentimental look on his eyes, stopped the moment the accompaniment ended and slightly smiled and bent down.  He seemed to be in high spirits until the moment he walked straight to his original seat.

Joon, who seemed to be moved by his singing, poured out his appreciation by tapping Jigu’s shoulder. Jigu smiled with an awkward expression and unconsciously tapped his one cheek with his index finger. Is he feeling awkward or nervous about being praised?

“Thank you for your hard work.”

“Thank you for your hard work.”

When the last stage was over, the filming ended. PD-nim’s voice became a fuse, and voices rang out saying ‘Thank you for your hard work’ can be heard from here and there. As soon as the order was given that it was okay to go back, people got up from their chairs. I thought everyone was going home, so I was also about to get up, but two people sitting at the far end approached me.

“You danced really well.”

“Yes?”

“I was amazed to see it and kept thinking about it until the end.”

“Ah, thank you.”

People who I thought would get up and leave right away, seemed to have the time to approach and talk to the main characters on the stage that they were impressed with.

The first two were the starting point, three more people came and praised me, and after that, a few more people came and gave their opinions. How long has it been since I was praised for dancing? As a human being, I couldn’t hate compliments, and the corners of my lips eventually went up.

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