How To End a Crush - Chapter 1.2

It’s been nearly two years since that day and I’m still crazy about him.

Noah Yurielle… One grade level above me and a skillful magician…

I wouldn’t consider what I felt for him to be devoted love exactly, but it was definitely something sincere. It’s gotten to the point where I’m completely infatuated with him.

“If that’s the case, then just tell him how you feel.”

Ah, this again. Like that idea hadn’t crossed my mind. If I had such courage, I would have already told him.

Feeling pathetic from hearing Dora’s remark, I buried my face in my hands and let out a prolonged sigh.

“Exactly how in the world am I supposed to tell him how I feel…?”

I’m just the ordinary daughter of a count, but him… He’s the son of a prestigious and high-ranking marquis. Such a gap in status was not something that even being born with magical powers could close.

“Everyone says that. Just confess your innermost feelings then get dumped later,” Dora said with a giggle.

She said this a little too easily. It was only just a month ago that her boyfriend, a fellow classmate, broke up with her. She ran off in tears and threw herself onto her bed when she got back to her dorm room.

“I don’t want to get dumped…”

I was on the verge of tears and I turned again to look through the window in the hallway that gave a clear view of the inside of the classroom.

I saw him on the opposite side of the glass. He was sitting at his desk reading his book.

He’s so handsome.

Just then, a pretty girl with lovely pinkish hair approached him as she let out what was probably the cutest little giggle anyone has ever heard.

“Noah, you’re here early.”

Noah looked up at her upon hearing his name.

At that moment, I felt my shoulders suddenly become weak.

“It’s Flora,” Dora whispered into my ear.

Flora Ivy… She was both my beloved Noah’s childhood friend and the second reason as to why I haven’t confessed my love to him yet in these past two years.

I guess it’s like they say, birds of a feather flock together. Flora was every bit as amazing of a person as Noah was.

She was unbelievably friendly, beautiful, intelligent, and gifted with incredible talent. I could go on and on, but you get the picture. In every possible way, she was perfect. A goddess.

Her thick, yet gentle wavy pink hair, her cute sky-blue eyes… Compared to her, I was nothing.

Did I even stand a chance against a female such as her? Would my beloved Noah even notice me?

Feeling dissatisfied with myself, I put my head down and fiddled with my inferior and commonplace yellow hair.

While Flora was talking to Noah in an affectionate tone, she suddenly glanced in my direction.

“Oh, Kate’s here too.” Flora put on a warm smile and waved over at Dora and I.

I forced a smile and opened the door to the classroom which we were using as the room for our after-school club meeting.

“Hello everyone.”

“Hi. You must be feeling so exhausted from preparing for the exams. Did you do the assigned readings in the book yet?” Flora said as she smiled pleasantly and patted me gently on the back.

I didn’t answer her and instead held up the book and smiled.

“Hi,” Noah said as he saw me, albeit slightly delayed. I hesitated in front of him and just nodded without uttering a single word.

I let out a very light sigh and took my seat. As soon as I sat down, I looked over at Noah, but in an indiscreet way so that no one would take notice.

Seeing his cloud-like silvery hair again made my heart beat faster and faster.

But then a heavy thought came crashing down onto my daydream; I’m just another club member… Just another student at this school. That’s all I am in his eyes and I imagine that’s all I’ll ever be.

I should be thankful he at least thought of me as a sincere and hardworking student.

No, I take that back. I should be thankful if he was at least aware of my very existence.

If it weren’t for this club, I probably would never have been able to get the chance to even talk to him.

Perhaps there are dozens of other girls just like me at this academy.

They all act like they know him because they’re in the same club. I’m sure Noah thinks of me as being no different from the rest of them.

“Okay, okay!” Flora took out a thick book and slammed it on the desk in order to get everyone’s attention.

“So then, would anyone like to share any comments?”

I half-heartedly opened my book.

I actually had no interest in the reading club. In fact, the only reason why I joined this club in the first place was just because Noah was in it. I would even go as far as to say that, with the exception of Flora, there is not even one person who shows up to these club meetings out of an interest in literature.

Noah joined the club because Flora had asked him to. I joined the club because Noah had joined it. Ah, the lovely domino effect.

“We’ll start with Kate.”

I quickly fixed my eyes on my book upon hearing Flora’s words.

“Oh… Okay.”

It was a book on classical literature with a pitch-black cover and an author whose name was impressive yet difficult to pronounce.

Besides, I didn’t really have the time nor the motivation to read because of the upcoming exams. However, I wanted to impress Noah, so I was able to cram in some reading before I came.

I lifted up the heavy book with my hand and glanced at Noah before opening my mouth.

“I thought the main character’s love seemed a bit shallow.”

“Oh, is that right?”

Flora’s eyes sparkled. It seemed that this new observation was intriguing to her.

That comment gave me some encouragement. But no matter how much I prepared, it was always hard for me to speak in front of the upperclassmen.

“Whenever you like someone, it’s impossible to tear your eyes away from that person, you know. You tend to keep your eyes on them. It’s like… like that, you know.” I started off confident, but for whatever reason, I ran out of steam the more I went on.

When I opened my mouth again to wrap up what I was saying, I felt someone’s gaze on me. In fact, a pair of gold-tinted eyes were staring directly at me.

“…!”

I quickly tipped my head down. Ah, I hope to god he didn’t see the look on my face.

He was just probably concentrating on what I was saying about the book, but still, my heart seemed to sink in that instant.

“Yeah, I guess I can see where you’re coming from. Thank you, Kate.” Flora put on a friendly smile. Fortunately for me, it didn’t seem like she was able to see through my act.

Those golden eyes were still staring at me through those glasses. I firmly shut my eyes and bit my lower lip so hard that I was able to taste blood.

***