How To Live As A Writer In A Fantasy World - Chapter 281: I Guess (4)
Everyone must have often heard this phrase on the internet: ‘It was there, but now it’s gone.’ (TL: doesn’t translate well…)
This phrase is often used to describe something that clearly existed but suddenly disappeared, a truly absurd situation. However, the opposite situation can be equally disconcerting. Both end up making you look like a liar.
I am currently experiencing such a situation. I am facing an utterly unreasonable situation where something that definitely wasn’t there now exists.
In the soon-to-be-released 21st volume of Xenon’s Biography, there’s a concept called devil transformation of the demon race. Specifically, it’s about overcoming inner evil to become a complete being.
Do you remember the “fusion” shown by the two elf heroes during the demon invasion of Alvenheim, or rather, Alvenheim, in Xenon’s Biography? Back then, the concept of unification was entirely my imagination. It was a setting that emerged from the thought, ‘Wouldn’t this be possible in a fantasy world?’
But now, it turns out that it’s a forbidden magic, so dangerous that it has been lost. There’s even a movement to theorize the processes exhibited during unification. This alone is quite bewildering, but this is clearly a setting—no, magic—that ‘existed’.
There is a significant difference between something that has precedent and something that sets a precedent.
Contamination of the World Tree’s roots, the existence of devil worshippers, Helium’s reaper organization, elf’s fusion, the fallen archbishop, etc. There have been numerous incidents since the release of Xenon’s Biography, but none set a precedent.
[How do you explain the magic engine?]
‘That’s something that existed on Earth as well. Considering the existence of the pump, it wouldn’t have taken long to invent it.’
As I said, the magic engine, in other words, the steam engine, exists even on Earth. Still, it’s no less surprising.
However, devil transformation—demons subjugating their inner devil—has no precedent. There have been cases where they completely lose their reason and go on a rampage after being engulfed by evil, but never maintaining their reason, as Cecily showed me.
Above all, more than the devil transformation itself, there’s one thing I can’t understand.
‘How can it be exactly the same as what I described? This doesn’t make any sense.’
Cecily told me that the inner devil was the exact opposite in color from the demons in Xenon’s Biography. Unlike the black-haired, red-eyed demons, the inner devil had white hair and blue eyes, with sclera stained black.
Even Cecily’s appearance in her devil form was exactly as described in the book. No matter how much cultural differences exist, this level of coincidence feels like the universe is conspiring against me.
So I went to Mora and questioned her. I asked if this made any sense, if I was truly a regressor without even realizing it myself.
This incident goes beyond crossing the line, it was an unprecedented event, often referred to as “forced misunderstanding.”
[I understand what you’re saying. But inner evil is just a mental image that resides in the mind.]
‘A mental image?’
[Yes. Try to imagine what I look like in your mind. You’ve read a lot of mythology books, haven’t you?]
Despite the unexpected suggestion from Mora, I obediently followed her instructions.
According to the mythology books I had read, Mora is a beautiful woman with black hair and blue eyes.
Additionally, she has a playful beauty, with a face that suits a mischievous and cheerful smile.
[In reality, I’m a bit prettier, but I’ll let that slide.]
Ah, I see. So she can even see the imagined image.
[Anyway, can you see my image in your mind as you imagine it?]
‘Yes.’
[That’s what a mental image is. It’s the projection of the image you have in your mind. The same goes for the inner devil.]
‘If that’s the case…’
[It means that Cecily’s inner devil changes according to her imagination.]
Cecily confessed to me that she had taken a peek at the manuscript out of curiosity while I was taking a nap.
After that, she entered secluded training, which matches the timing perfectly. And if Mora’s explanation is correct, an inner devil is manifested through imagination…
‘No matter what, it doesn’t change the fact that it’s forced.’
[This was all done by her, not me. I did nothing wrong.]
‘You said there won’t be anything wrong!’
[I said there is nothing wrong for now, not that there is nothing wrong at all.]
Am I imagining the conversation going in circles? I rubbed my face dry, struggling to accept the situation.
I’ll discuss it with Descal, but the shock he will receive will be much stronger than mine. Furthermore, Cecily will reveal her devilization to the public in a speech following the release of volume 21.
Just as Arwen confessed her mixed-blood status during the mixed-blood incident, Cecily will show her devilization to the people.
I’m at a loss for what to do in this situation that is far from what I had anticipated.
[There’s no need to overthink it. As I said before, there will be no threats to you or those you love in the near future.]
‘You said last time that there would be a crisis for me!’
[That was a personal crisis. The crisis mentioned by my brother and me is one that could threaten your very future.]
The gods possess the power to glimpse into the future. They can use this ability to inform their cherished followers when a crisis is approaching.
However, depending on the level of divine power, they might deliver ambiguous prophecies or tell it directly, as they did with me.
The severity of the crisis also varies, so it is by no means omnipotent.
Nevertheless, I was relieved to know that there is no immediate threat to the safety of myself and those I love.
This means that even if Cecily’s speech greatly impacts Helium, it won’t have any adverse effects on her.
[As I mentioned before, just knowing the future can significantly impact it. Considering that, I am informing you of the future.]
‘You’re talking about the time paradox, right?’
[Is that what it’s called on Earth? You’re probably right. Out of countless ‘choices,’ one is selected and informed to your current self. That choice creates a branch of the future, leading to events occurring. We call that ‘fate.’]
‘…It’s complicated.’
It’s strange to try to understand a transcendent being like Mora as a mere mortal. Even in my past life, the time paradox was full of contradictions, making it difficult to comprehend.
While I might understand space, even in mythology, ‘time’ is known to be a force that only gods can barely manage.
No matter how much a god can turn back, slow down, or accelerate time, they cannot stop ‘the flow of time’ itself.
‘Anyway, there won’t be any problem if Cecily Noona demonstrates devilization in front of people, right?’
[No problem. The demons will actually be delighted. Demons are always anxious because they know they are like ticking time bombs. The very fact that the inner devil can be completely eradicated is remarkable. Cecily will set a clear precedent.]
Demons are a cursed race from birth. For demons, the inner devil is the root cause of their tragic lives.
This made it difficult for them to express emotions properly, and they were somewhat reluctant to meet other races. This continued even after the launch of Xenon’s Biography.
Fortunately, the situation has significantly improved since the exhibition, and now they are often seen mingling warmly with other races.
However, they are still well aware that they are like ticking time bombs.
Living a life feeling emotions like ordinary humans, free from the inner devil—this is a lifelong desire for demons.
‘I’m curious about what kind of speech Cecily Noona will give.’
And Cecily will completely fulfill that desire through her speech.
However, it is likely to be quite different from Arwen’s speech. Devilization is fine, but the timing is crucial.
The nobles of Helium, as well as the citizens, will be curious about when, where, and how Cecily suppressed her inner devil.
This is the key point. How this question is addressed will determine whether the speech ends successfully or leaves a lingering sense of dissatisfaction.
Arwen was a half-breed herself, and I helped her, but there’s not much I can do for this speech in Helium.
[You don’t need to worry about that. It’ll be an interesting situation.]
‘…Mora?’
Luminous didn’t say anything, but Mora’s words make me very uneasy. Especially because there’s a clear precedent set by my mother’s visit to Helium.
But should I have expected it? Mora again passed it off nonchalantly, as if she had no intention of explaining.
[Even if I tell you, nothing will change. So, I won’t say anything.]
‘…Do as you please.’
I don’t even have the energy to respond anymore. While it’s true she cares about me, her playful nature is even worse than Cecily’s, making her difficult to deal with.
I sighed deeply inwardly and spoke to Mora in a somewhat tired tone.
‘How many more times do I have to go through this? We’re at the point where self-fulfilling prophecies are occurring.’
[It might happen once or twice more, I guess?]
‘So you can’t be certain either, Mora?’
[The future changes based on your choices. But don’t worry, nothing threatening will happen, just some troublesome things.]
‘That’s a relief, at least.’
So I just have to live with the flow. I sighed again.
I could overlook the chaos that breaks out, but this is the first time a self-fulfilling chaos is happening, and it seems my mental state is collapsing.
While venting my frustrations to Mora seems to help my mental state recover a bit, there’s still a problem left.
That’s the fact that Cecily has concluded that I’m a reincarnated person. It’s like the saying, ‘A cow catches a mouse while backing up,’ she suspected despite herself and realized I’m a reincarnator.
She had been vaguely suspicious since Arwen’s remarks, but this incident has confirmed it completely.
Of course, it’s not that it’s awkward or uncomfortable. I had intended to eventually reveal to my family that I’m reincarnated.
But it’s burdensome. Even without going far, Kate almost worships me, and Cecily has become similarly excessive.
Saying I’m a saint who came from another dimension to save the demons, that the gods had to exert themselves for me to cross over, and so on.
It’s a mix of half-truths and exaggerations, making it tricky to reveal the truth easily.
[Why don’t you just tell them? It’s going to be hard to deny it anyway.]
‘I plan to tell Cecily Noona first. For the others, I’ll slowly lay the groundwork.’
[What about that child Arwen?]
‘Does Arwen also think I’m a reincarnator?’
[Hmm… It’s a bit complicated with her. Do you know about parallel worlds?]
Why is she suddenly talking about parallel worlds?
[That child thinks you came over from a world where a hero like Xenon didn’t exist, from such a world. She believes you experienced all the stories of the Elf Queen and Kair, and Xenon and Mary.]
‘No, that’s ridiculous…’
[Think carefully about the kindness you’ve shown her so far. I wonder if she’s mistaken or not.]
Is she being sarcastic or teasing me? Anyway, the fact that Arwen is thinking like that leaves me at a loss for words. Perhaps it’s the synergy of my heightened status in various ways, Arwen’s misconception, and the hint of reincarnation.
Moreover, since Arwen is the queen of Alvenheim, she must be even more immersed in it. It’s not entirely impossible.
I felt a throbbing headache coming on and let out a small laugh inwardly. They say giving up makes things easier, so it might be best to write without any thoughts from now on.
‘Haa… Alright. Giving up would be easier.’
[Good thinking. You know that stress is the root of all illnesses, right?]
‘Of course, I know. Ah, there’s one thing I’m curious about. Can I ask?’
[Ask anything.]
‘I’m curious about what changes occur when a demon like Cecily defeats their inner devil.’
[That depends on which demon’s descendant it is. In her case, being a succubus descendant, her body and aura become more seductive. She also transforms into a body specialized for absorbing energy. Do you understand what I mean?]
Of course, I do. Yesterday, I was thoroughly drained while being with Cecily.
It’s embarrassing to say, but Cecily’s evolved inside significantly compared to before. To exaggerate a bit, it feels like a 3-minute curry.
Additionally, her stamina and desires are as strong as during her period of the evil cycle. If I hadn’t received divine power in advance, I would have slept all day.
‘So, does that mean it will be like that every day…?’
[Not exactly. Conquering the inner devil means gaining its power. The desire is just part of that power.]
‘Does her period of evil cycle proceed the same as before?’
[Most things are the same. Except for maintaining rationality when becoming a devil.]
I was scared that Cecily might be in heat every day, but I’m relieved. If that were the case, Mora would have given a serious warning.
I sighed in relief inwardly and slowly planned for the future.
Not that there’s much to plan, other than Cecily’s upcoming speech.
I can gradually lay the groundwork to reveal that I’m a reincarnator. It would be strange to suddenly declare, “I’m a reincarnator.”
After that, while having various conversations with Mora, it was time to receive divine power and return.
[Oh, by the way. A piece of advice: a major turning point is coming soon. It will be quite an important one for you.]
‘A turning point?’
[Yes. A turning point is coming, and the future will change based on the choice you make.]
‘Is it a bad future?’
In response to my anxious question, Mora answered in a rarely serious voice.
[You will both struggle a bit. There won’t be any danger, but you will be very busy.]
‘Can you tell me when it will be?’
Then she replied.
[In a month.]
It wasn’t far into the future.
Translators note:
The next arc, after helium, is FIRE