I and My Husband Sleep in a Coffin - CH 66

Chapter 66 A man’s lifetime job

The wine was flowing freely.

Wang Xiaomie pondered how such wonderful wine was made. It had been so long since it had been brewed, but it was still fresh and mellow, with no turbidity, and quite strong to boot.

Wang Xiaomie played with fire and drank a cup in one go. As a result, he nearly spewed a blue-red flame.

Wang Xiaomie: …F*ck! Is this the water of life, vodka?

Wang Xiaomie felt his stomach was hot, his face was heated, his head was dizzy, his eyes were fluttering, the expressions on his face got less and less, and he was absent-minded after drinking a couple of small cups. He realized he was drinking too quickly, so he hastily put down his cup and sat up straight for fear of making a fool of himself in front of An Kai and company.

Wen Fengjin and An Kai were really good at drinking, having already finished three small jars. Not only were there no signs of drunken insanity, but the minimal intoxication also increasingly revealed the ancient romantics’ arrogance and recklessness.

It’s just that drunk men are prone to talking about things that make them feel proud about themselves.

So Wang Xiaomie, who let out a straight-faced hiccup that smelled like wine, heard Wen Fengjin and An Kai begin to brag about their respective lifetime jobs — wife.

Wang Xiaomie: …

An Kai began spouting poetry and flowery phrases at first, stating, “When I came, I noticed thousands of lights in the underground palace, as well as the spotless main hall and entrance, and I thought it didn’t fit Senior Wen’s style. I suppose that was Madam’s doing.”

Wang Xiaomei pursed his lips, wishing to hiccup once more. When he heard the words, he nodded foolishly.

An Kai stated, “Madam is a model of virtue. Senior Wen is quite lucky.”

“He is really good and behaves spoiled every day,” Bigshot Wen hooked his lips.

Wang Xiaomie flushed: You’re talking nonsense, I don’t!

“But, my family’s Chengjing also occasionally acts spoiled.” An Kai raised his glass in salute and drank all the wine, triumphantly declaring, “He strangled my neck because of my intimacy the day before yesterday, forgetting that I don’t need to breathe anymore. He’s so cute, hahahaha.”

“……” Wang Xiaomie’s lips twitched: …he genuinely wants your life, you moron. Wake up, brother! You’re making me wonder if I even know what the term “spoiled” means anymore!

And cute? To hell with your “cute”!

“So, you rarely take the initiative,” Wen Fengjin said as he nodded and threw a sidelong glance at Wang Xiaomie.

… Did I mishear something? Why do I believe Boss Wen is jealous as well?

Wang Xiaomie remained silent for a moment before gritting his teeth: “My bad. Don’t worry, the next time I’ll buy the toughest rope and wrap it around your neck every day until you’re gone!”

“All right, I’m looking forward to it.” Wang Xiaomie’s ears itched when Wen Fingjin laughed softly.

Wen Fengjin smiled and raised his head to take a swig of the wine. A few drops spilled from the corner of his mouth, slid across his elevated Adam’s apple and collarbone, and sunk into his spread collar.

“My shixiong is very tolerant and indulgent to me, even though he won’t take the initiative.” Wen Fengjin abruptly added.

Wang Xiaomie was stunned, coughed a few times, and lowered his head, his ears going bright red.

An Kai glanced at the person in his arms who was covered in white fabric. “Indeed, the more I see, the more I envy. Chengjing has poisonous purple hair all over his body and doesn’t even blush. Alas, he has way too much hair… I can’t see his face properly, and it pricks my mouth. Fortunately, it doesn’t grow there.”

Wang Xiaomie: “…”

F*ck! Where is there, ah? We are decent people, please don’t spew nonsense!

Wen Fengjin had just opened his lips to say something, but Wang Xiaomie covered his mouth with a “slap”!

“I’ll kill you if you say anything needless!” Wang Xiaomie, who was red-faced, uttered word by word from between his clenched teeth, and Wen Fengjin’s long and narrow eyes smiled.

They gazed at each other for a while, then Wang Xiaomie’s palm got damp.

“……”

I’m going to beat you to death today!!! Nobody can stop me!!!

Wang Xiaomie, who was on the verge of committing domestic violence, told himself, “You can’t do it when outsiders are here,” before releasing his clenched fists.

He took the wine cup and began “Glug, glug, glup” downing the scorching liquid facing the acacia tree, simply thinking “out of sight, out of mind.”

The black-bellied Boss Wen and An Kai proceeded to brag about their wives over there.

Boss Wen: “My shixiong is kind-hearted and beautiful, a noble and upright gentleman like jade.”

An Kai: “My family’s Chengjing has a poisonous heart, but he’s really good-looking.”

Boss Wen: “My shixiong is older than me and has taken excellent care of me since my most down and out childhood. He’s done a lot for me.”

An Kai: “My family’s Chengjing is older than me and has exploited my feelings since my most naive childhood. But he’s really good-looking.”

Boss Wen: “My wife can also take care of the housework.”

An Kai: “My wife is really good-looking.”

Boss Wen: “My wife can cook.”

An Kai: “My wife is really good-looking.”

Boss Wen: “My wife is considerate and lovely.”

An Kai: “My wife is really good-looking.”

“My——”

“My——”

After a half-hour of flaunting, the two men toasted each other with immense satisfaction, looked at each other, and smiled.

Wang Xiaomie, who observed the entire process: …………

I get Wen Fengjin, but An Kai, what the hell are you satisfied with?!

Seriously.

Face cons are beyond redemption.

… … …

Wang Xiaomie, dejected, began to drink wine ‘glug glug glug’ once again, entirely forgetting that he was a three-cup waste.

So, after an hour—

Wen Fengjin silently adjusted his sitting posture as he smiled at Wang Xiaomie’s rosy little face from the corners of his long and narrow eyes.

This drink’s potency was extraordinary. Wang Xiaomie was sitting extremely straight, but the moment he felt something next to him, he quietly leaned a little bit on Wen Fengjin’s shoulder, his little face expressionless and flushed. An Kai and Wen Fengjin both noticed his sneaky little move.

“Hiccup~”

Wang Xiaomie smacked his lips and hiccuped, his eyelids half-drooped, and he rubbed the shoulder under his head lightly with his forehead after leaning in.

An Kai and Wen Fengjin couldn’t resist laughing.

“Hahaha…”

“Envious! I’m really envious!” An Kai casually tossed the small cup in his hand into the abyss beneath the platform, then took a long drink from the wine jar under the low table. Wen Fengjin, on the other hand, remained leaning against the acacia tree, its red peach blossom petals falling on the black table and into the wine cups.

“But Senior Wen, I have something to tell you.”

An Kai suddenly kissed the man bound in white cloth in his arms, set down the wine jar, and stated solemnly, “I encountered a unique human about twenty years ago. He has great malice towards ‘people’ like us and refers to us as people who break the natural laws.”

Wen Fengjin paused as he was about to take a sip of wine.

An Kai went on: “In Qishan, where I dwell, there are numerous corpses buried. Because most of them did not have a fortunate chance, their thoughts were clouded, and they ended up eating a few humans.”

He said it indifferently, as if he had no fear or discomfort with the corpses devouring people.

Wang Xiaomie was drawn to his words, and the silly fufu looked up.

“At first, that person who came to Qishan might have been following clues to get rid of those poor ba$tards.” As An Kai gulped the wine, the liquid collided in the jar and the long feather crest in his hair band swung. “His weapon is a peculiar golden-copper-colored small hammer with a long handle. It’s indestructible to zombies, so the wretches soon died for real.”

Long-handled golden small hammer———!!!

Wen Fengjin put down the blue cup calmly, and Wang Xiaomie had mostly sobered up from the liquor.

An Kai shook the wine jug and said, “One of those who failed to get a lucky chance happened to be one of my former subordinates. He exposed my existence to that person before he died. Soon after, that person organized a group of tomb robbers, handed the weapon to them, and began excavating graves all over the place. Heh~ He actually managed to track me down. I was already a drought demon at the time, and while the weird weapon annoyed and wounded me, I almost killed him…”

“It goes without saying that he was going to die… he should have died… but…” The wine jar smacked on the table with a ‘bam,’ and An Kai’s smile was wiped clean.

“However, after swallowing unusual blood, he exploded with immense force and escaped. The smell of that blood is extremely close to that of you and your wife, Senior.”

“I wonder if you could explain it to me?”

When An Kai dropped his smile, Wang Xiaomie finally realized how terrible An Kai was, who went on the battlefield at the age of thirteen, died of hatred after years of bathing in blood, and even transformed himself into a zombie with his resentment.

Those eyes and the aura around him were sharp enough to cut wounds on exposed skin!

The air was thick with the fishy and sweet odor of blood, and a dreadful pressure rushed across the wine table, where cheers, chatter, and laughter had been heard only seconds before.

“Knock, knock.”

The gorgeous Wen Fengjin, his silver hair writhing across the splendid flaming red suit, narrowed his long pitch-dark eyes and remarked lightly, “You scared him.”

Then he asked, “Is it that you think your head is pretty firm?”

Wang Xiaomie was relieved when the bitter and astringent medicinal aroma instantly dissipated the bloody odor.

An Kai remained still for a moment under Wen Fengjin’s gaze before abruptly grinning, “I’m a military man who was just joking after drinking too much. Please excuse me, Senior Wen and Madam… But that person, as well as the blood, exist.”

“That human is a lunatic. There’s no knowing what he’ll do to kill me, or rather, ‘people’ like us.”

“I’m only reminding you out of kindness.” An Kai drained a large mouthful from the wine jar, spilling the extra wine on his body, and looked up with an incomprehensible smile in his eyes, “After all, we are all the same monsters…”

Wen Fengjin was noncommittal about this sentence.

Wang Xiaomie, on the other hand, remained silent for a few moments before asking, “What does that person look like… Do you know what his name is?”

“Mn… Let me think,” An Kai said.

“He wore a peculiar cyan robe, his hair was mostly gray and braided, and I heard the tomb robbers call him—”

“Yi Yan.”

“What!!!”

Wang Xiaomie’s eyes widened in astonishment.

… … …

It was late at night, and the wholesale market had finally become deserted and silent.

Bai Yu, who was carrying a rucksack, first snatched the lock in Yi Yan’s hand and locked the shop, then turned around and scratched his head in embarrassment when he saw Yi Yan’s smiling face.

The two men walked side by side in silence and harmony on the lane. It had rained, and the night remained cool. Bai Yu was wearing half sleeves and rubbed his arms. The next thing he knew, a warm hand wrapped around his bare arm in the air and pushed him aside with a slight force.

Yi Yan stood calmly in the windy position, shielding him from the chilling night breeze.

The two men walked on, as if oblivious to the little incident.

But Bai Yu peeked at Yi Yan’s profile, who was looking straight ahead, and hastily turned his gaze away, a little red blooming on his dark face.

[The author has something to say: [Small Theater]

Wen Fengjin: A man’s lifelong job.

An Kai: Wife.]

Is Big Gray Wolf back?