I Loved You In Order To Survive - Chapter 11

Let me explain the situation like this. 

Elizabeth Bismar, the first daughter of Count Bismar, had been in an engagement of convenience with Johann Meyer since she was very young.

Political marriages between families were common, but the case of Elizabeth, in particular, greatly increased the prestige of Count Bismar. To have a relationship with the famous Duke Meyer!

But they first met when they were only three or four years old. There was no way they had feelings for each other. At least, it seemed that was the case for Elizabeth.

As Elizabeth grew up, attended various parties, and made her social debut, she found what she thought was ‘true love’. However, Elizabeth’s marriage had already been decided a long time ago.

Elizabeth, who was in conflict over the status of her family and love, eventually ran away with the third son of a Baron.

Naturally, the Duke of Meyer’s family went on a rampage, and Count Bismar needed something to cover up his daughter’s betrayal.

In short, Count Bismar took Lily in because he thought she was valuable. It was not incomprehensible that there was expectation in his eyes as the new child, who had been covered up as disgrace to the family, grew up to become an important asset.

Having been accustomed to living with her family’s eyes on her for months, Lily quickly judged the situation. She could survive in this world only if she liked that man. She was a lady made for that purpose. It was now understandable why she had to suffer from excessive education and lessons.

It didn’t matter if Johann Meyer was someone she liked or not. She didn’t want to go back to the old days. She thought that if Johann did not like her, the Count might send her back to that dark, narrow attic.

It was okay when the attic was all she knew, but now she was a connoisseur of soft beds, rugs, and good food that made her feel full. The thought of going back to her old life was terrifying.

She didn’t want to lose what she had. So she played a cultured young lady so as not to offend Johann.

Johann thought of her as another daughter of Count Bismar who had been unable to go outside due to chronic illness. Compared to other young ladies, her skinny body also served as an advantage.

Fortunately, he liked her quite a bit, and often visited the county to see her.

Johann Meyer was certainly a good man that anyone would covet. He was a gentleman, and he respected her words. He was, above all, the heir to a prestigious family.

It was to the point where Lily couldn’t understand Elizabeth, who left her fiancé like this. How much better was the son of the Baron that she ran away with him?

But Lily soon found out why.

One day, Johann invited her to his mansion. It was a good sign when a young lady was directly invited without formal engagement.

Count Bismar was very pleased and had the maids dress Lily in the finest dress and jewelry. Hopefully, Duke Meyer would forgive Elizabeth’s mistake, and his family’s honor would be preserved.

That was entirely up to Lily.

Lily was so tense that it was difficult to breathe. She had no choice but to continue forward.

‘Can I do well?’

‘Will I be able to make him propose to me…?’

Johann greeted Lily politely, his smile shining brightly. Dressed in a simple suit, he looked more radiant than Lily, who was covered in expensive jewels and silk. She was intimidated for nothing.

“Lady Heloise.”

He kissed the back of her hand as she got out of the carriage and escorted her. Lily replayed in her head the things she had learned so far.

Johann was the heir of a prestigious family. If she did anything to put doubt in his mind, even once… This kind of opportunity might never come again.

Johann led her into a small room. A tea table had been set up, but there was no one and nothing else.

Lily couldn’t relax at all, so she spoke in a shy voice.

“Thank you so much for inviting me, Duke. I don’t know how to repay your kindness…”

“Such a rigid title doesn’t suit me. You are the woman who will be my wife.”

Surprised, Lily raised her head and looked at him. Her whole body was about to overflow with joy.

“No, before that, it will be decided by how you behave in front of me today.”

“What?”

“Heloise.”

He uttered the following words casually.

“Take it off.”

Lily didn’t understand for a while. It was like hearing a foreign language.

‘What did this man just say?’

He spoke again.

“Did you not hear me?”

“I’m sorry, but what did you say…?”

“I told you to take off your clothes.”

The joy that had overtaken her disappeared.

Her mind went numb.

Even though she knew she had to listen to his request, she couldn’t bear it.

He came closer and closer…

Her heart sank at the sight of his mischievous smile.

“Or, are you the type who prefers being stripped?”

He was unbuttoning the button on her chest. They unfastened one by one with a clicking sound. The small but intense sound awakened her mind.

“Stop it.”

Of course, he didn’t listen to her.

Lily pushed him.

“Don’t touch me!”

Johann never showed any signs of backing down, probably because he had made up his mind when he called her in the first place. He grabbed her body and pushed her roughly into a corner.

He grabbed Lily’s face and forced her to make eye contact.

“You think you have the right to reject me? You are the replacement for my fiancée. Don’t you dare say no. Nothing good will come from being abandoned by me. Your body isn’t noble enough to prioritize it over your family. You have to do whatever I tell you to do. There are no other options.”

No one had ever taught Lily anything like this. She had learned how to greet the son of a Duke and how to respond when he asked for a dance, but no one taught her how to deal with the Duke’s attempts to molest her.

So Lily decided to act her own way. It was true that in order to become part of the family, she had to catch Johann’s eye. But did the family take precedence over her body?

It didn’t.

It really didn’t.

Lily pushed Johann with all her might. When he fell to the floor, she smashed the mirror hanging on the wall.

The piece of the mirror she picked up stabbed her skin painfully. But it was fine. Because it was a hundred times better to be stabbed by a piece of a mirror than to give her body to that b*stard.

She pointed the sharp piece of mirror at him.

“I understand why your fiancée ran away. You did this to a woman you have just gotten to know… it must have been even worse for your fiancée! I am not that insignificant! I’m not a stupid woman who doesn’t know how to protect myself!”

Johann looked as if he saw a ghost as she threatened him with blood dripping from her hand. He would never have dared to think that a woman could do such a thing.

But Lily was different.

Lily was the daughter of a maid, so she was able to do crazy things like this as if they were nothing.

“You are completely crazy!”

He tried to intimidate her even while he was pale and scared.

“Do you think you and your family will be safe after doing this to me?”

“Are you going to do anything more than say that you will cancel the wedding?”

“Your father will try to kill you.”

“At least he’s better than a man who wants to do whatever he wants with my body!”

Lily didn’t really intend to stab him. After threatening him enough, she ran out of the mansion. The carriage she arrived in was waiting for her and hadn’t left yet.

The driver was horrified to see her so messy with bloodied hands.

“Miss! Are you okay?”

“No!”

Without a second thought, she got into the carriage. After leaving the mansion, the numbness faded away, and tears burst forth. It wasn’t because she was afraid of being retaliated against by the Count.

Just… she was so sad that tears came out. It was sad that she was treated like that.

“Don’t ask, and please go back. Quickly.”

Lily pleaded, wanting to get away from this horrible mansion as soon as possible. The driver drove the carriage without pressing further. She hurriedly tried to wipe away her tears, but instead, her face got covered in blood.

The Count and his wife were astounded when they saw that the girl they had sent expecting to bring back good news had returned as a mad woman.

They asked what the hell had happened to her, but Lily didn’t bother to explain. The Count must have thought that she had been attacked by a thief and ordered the servants to treat her hands.

However, it did not take long for what she had done to reach the Count’s ears.

***