I Shall Be Happy (Attack On Titan Fan-fic) - Chapter 64

(The night before)

Surrounding a low rectangular table, a group of 10 people of all ages were feasting merrily. On the table was nearly all food imaginable, including even seafood!

“Come on! Drink up! It’s a feast!”

“Cheers!!”

“Hey! The kids are still here! Stop drinking so much.” Mikan reprimanded the two men of the house, one of which is her own husband. But seeing it yielded no result, she glared at them once last time before asking the new guests with concern. “Do you guys enjoy the food? Tell me if there’s anything wrong alright?”

“Food is great ma’am.” Furlan was the only one acting like a gentleman, a clear contrast to his close friend, Isabel.

“*Nom* It’s amazing!! *Nom*”

“What about you Levi? Do you want anything?”

“I’m good, just tea is fine.”

“Sure, just wait for me a bit.” But before Mikan could stand up, Athanatos beat her to it.

“Wait Mikan. Let me do it. Since Levi is my uncle, I should show him some respect.”

Hearing that, Mikan’s face bloomed into a bright smile. Her son was growing more mȧturėly everyday. Why shouldn’t she be proud?

“Sure. Remember to boil the tea leaves until it gets a clear greenish-orange color.”

“Okay!” Athanatos replied back before running off to the kitchen.

———————————————

(Meanwhile in the kitchen)

“Alright. First step is to get to tea leaves. Done.”

In front Athanatos, was a bunch of freshly picked tea leaves. No… rather than calling it tea leaves, it’d better to called them normal leaves instead. Worse… they also weren’t just one type of leaves, there were 5 of different types, with one being grass.

Why did he do this? Well, according to Athanatos’ logic, 5 are better 1, thus it should taste better.

“Hmm. Second step: use water. Huh? Why water? Wouldn’t the taste be too light then? Mikan also didn’t said I have to use water. Right! I will use whiskey, after all, it already has a orangish color. But how would I get the green color if I do that? Hmm…”

It was at that moment, Athanatos’ eyes landed on something nearby the sink.

“How could I forget! The dishwashing liquid!!! It’s green!!”

“Right. I should use a proportion of 1:10, soap to whiskey, since the taste of the soap would be overpowering otherwise.”

And finally, Athanatos had ȧssembled all the ingredients together. In front of him were 5 different types of leaves, a small cup of dishwashing liquid, and a bottle of whiskey.

“Third step is to boil it. This should be easy.”

But instead of putting in the liquid first, Athanatos just then remembered that tea leaves are usually best drinking dried.

However, the tea leaves in front of him are too fresh, thus, he improvised and decided to fry the leaves instead!

“La lala lala~ Lalalala~ Huh? Why are the leaves releasing smoke? Is this normal. Well, I guess that means I need to put in the whiskey and the soap now..”

No… Athanatos. The leaves are not just releasing smoke… It’s fking burnt to a crisp!

But he didn’t care. Although the smell was a bit weird. It was still bearable. Worst comes to worst, he’d just have to improvise a little more. He’s a genius after all.

“Done! This tea is so marvelous! I guess I should name it, ‘Ambrosia of the Cooking God, version 68.9’. An amazing name indeed. As expected of me.”

Right after naming it, he was just about to pour the tea(?) into a cup, but stopped the moment he had a sudden epiphany.

“It smelled a bit bad. Hmm… I guess I should also add some perfumes to make the smell better. Hmm. Chrysanthemums should work well..”

(A/N Chrysanthemum flowers represent death… and the anus 🙂

And so he did what he thought was right. Moving at the speed of light, he went to the most luxurious flower shop in a country called Marley.

Usually, this shop is only available to the richest nobles within the country. But who cares. Sooner or later, most of them will become ‘good’ people later on, so it’s better to let Athanatos to might just well as to take advantage of the situation.

Then .0001 second later, he was back to the house, but this time, with a bottle of the highest grade of perfume in his hand.

*Poof*

“Finish! Alright. It’s time to serve it now.”

————————————

“C’mon! Dig in. This is my masterpiece!”

Levi seeing the cup of tea in Athanatos’ hand, felt it was a bit weird and raised his brows up.

It has a natural combination of green and orange colors, indicating that the tea was of high quality. Its smell though… was different. It smelled too good in fact, like it was flower.

A tea made with flowers? It’s not common but it’s not unusual either.

Deciding to forget to think about everything, Levi thought nothing could go wrong and brought the cup of tea to his mouth.

‘Hmm… it smells really nice.’ And just as he was about to savor the taste of the tea, the moment the tea entered his mouth, his entire body paralyzed.

“Urgh…” Levi tried to speak something, but even his throat was paralyzed.

Seeing that Levi couldn’t even move, Athanatos thought Levi was speechless at the taste. With a bright smile on his face, Athanatos said while laughing, “Hehehe. Is it that good that you are speechless? Heh.”

“Ah! Is it that good? Levi bro let me try!” Isabel, seeing everything that was happening, also decided to try it. Quickly latching onto the still paralyzed Levi, she snatched the cup of tea and just chuck it down like a shot. But just like Levi, the very moment she tasted a drop of the tea, her entire body froze, dropping the cup of tea in the process.

But luckily, Athanatos was there to save the falling cup of tea.

“Phew. Luckily it didn’t drop. Uncle Furlan, would you want to try? I guarantee the taste!”

“Sure. I guess it must be quite good that even Levi is so shocked.” Accepting the cup of tea, he also slowly savor it by drinking it at a leisure pace.

“Urgh… You!”

“Is it that good that you’re also fainting? Don’t worry, if you fall asleep, you can sleep in the guest room.” Athanatos said brightly while giving a thumb up at the slowly losing consciousness Furlan.

“Oh dear. What did you put into the cup of tea? I don’t remember having any kind of leaves with this flowery smell.

“Whiskey, fresh fried leaves, dishwashing liquid, and chrysanthemum perfume.”

“”…”” Everyone who heard what Athanatos said, became speechless. They were secretly cheering on the fact that it wasn’t they who drank the tea(?) or else god knows what might have happened to them.

Actually, even if one were to follow all the steps that Athanatos had done, it would not produce the same result. The reason as to why the tea is so dangerous, there are a couple of reasons why.

Firstly, the grass that Athanatos had freshly plucked, was somewhat special. It was grown on soil with high sulfur content, thus when he fried those grass, it created extremely poisonous sulfur gas. And at that moment when he added the whiskey, it bound the sulfur into the alcohol molecular structure, creating a chemical called Atracurium besilate, which acted as a neuromuscular blocking agent. But… this was actually the weakest one out of all the chemicals created.

The real dangerous reason is due to the fact that he boiled both the dishwashing liquid and the whiskey at such a precise ratio, that he created more than 100 of the most dangerous neuromuscular blocking agents. These includes: Cisatracurium, Rocuronium, Vecuronium, Pancuronium, Rapacuronium, etc. All, capable of putting a grown up elephant to sleep within seconds if given at the right doses. It’s a miracle that they’re still alive.

Coughing dryly, Mikan decided it was better to have them sleep inside the house, rather than leaving it to Athanatos, who might possibly just leave them down on the bridge. “*Ahem*, Thana-kun? Can you bring them to the guest room? It’s already quite late.”

“Okay!”

*Sigh* Why is it that the MC of this novel have to be so special? This is so sad. The author also wanted to write more but now he needed to finish his hw. This is also quite sad.