I Want To Be Your First – R19 - Chapter 87

The long rays of the sun reached Ariel’s cheek through the window. Dust floating mid-air was reflected by the sun and shone brightly. Whether it was because she was crying that she lost her energy or because accepting him was hard, Ariel whispered that it was nothing, and to forget about it quietly, before falling asleep in Berthwald’s arms like a broken doll.

It was a quiet afternoon, where even the sounds of breathing were silent. Still holding her in his embrace, Berthwald stretched out his finger and brushed against Ariel’s eyes. At the sight of her swollen eyelids, his heart ached unwittingly.

“My face and what not isn’t really important, so why would she say that?”

A sigh contained within the end of his words. With furrowed brows, he carefully brushed against her round shoulders. A round jawline, a slender neck that was barely the size of a hand, a prominent collarbone, and round shoulders. The curves that followed were flawless.

‘No. Was that all?’

Berthwald raised his gaze to Ariel’s sleeping face. With small features that were gathered closely and ebony locks that wrapped around her elegantly like fine silk.

She was someone that possessed everything that was to his tastes without his realisation. That was none other than Ariel Aegis. Ariel was perfection in itself.

…When was it that her shortcomings began to disappear? Many criticized Ariel for her blindness and being a witch. Come to think of it, Berthwald had also shunned her when they first met.

It was clearly like that.

…From a certain point onwards, her flaws became insignificant to him. Whether it was her blindness or muteness, or even if she couldn’t move her limbs, Ariel was still Ariel. Her shortcomings didn’t stop him from loving her. No, if Ariel was a normal person, she would have been taken away by some other person, so it was much worse.

“I’m fine with things as it is now. But it seems that you aren’t.”

Was it only him that thought that it was fine? Berthwald never imagined that Ariel would say that she wanted to see what’s in front of her.

It would have been fine if it was spoken in passing, but she had to cry like that while saying that she wanted to see him. Berthwald’s heart ached as it seemed like it was his fault. He just couldn’t pretend to be composed as the guilt and anxiety became overwhelming.

He could’ve soothed her by simply saying that he understood, and that they’ll try harder, but his heart ached so much that he couldn’t do so.

‘Was it supposed to be like this…when you have someone you like?’

‘When you’re in love with someone…Would you be deeply assimilated with the other person’s feelings?’

He bit lightly on the tip of the nose belonging to the woman that swayed his feelings. Ariel’s brows furrowed like she was complaining about it, and with a smile, Berthwald gently pressed on her frown.

Eyes…

It was her eyes.

Unless a miracle occurred, those unseeing eyes wouldn’t open overnight. Even though he heard that she had been subjected to the mistreatment of various shamans and wizards ever since she was young, the fact that she still can’t see meant that all of those were meaningless. However, if…

“Even if there’s only a tiny chance… If your eyes could see.”

can see my eyes.”

“You must see me first. Do you understand?”

After a series of kisses on her swollen eyelids and nose, Berthwald found his own words ludicrous and laughed quietly.

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Along with the rain pouring down onto the ground, the chill of autumn could be felt along with the scent of the sea. The choppy waters from yesterday disappeared and the sea of Grand Pahar with rain pouring down onto it was very calm, as if it was welcoming the upcoming winter.

Unlike the North that suffered from harsh cold waves, although the South didn’t experience winter, the excited atmosphere at the end of the year at the County wasn’t any different.  As Eva checked the state of cleanliness, she glanced out the window and let out a deep sigh.

“Oh dear, I thought that the rain would stop soon, but why is it pouring so much?”

While organising the cleaning tools, Jude followed Eva’s lead and gazed out of the window. She thought that it would be a brief shower, but it has been raining for quite a while. Jude looked at the herb field located at one side of the garden and tilted her head.

“What’s wrong, Eva? Is it because of herbs? Meshu seemed to have woken up at dawn and finished repairs.”

“No…I’m afraid that the buttercups I planted would be washed away. I was going to harvest them today.”

“Oh, was it the ones you’d planted last month, the seedlings that were very expensive?”

“Yeah. I heard that it would rot quickly if it was rained on. If I knew that this would happen, I would’ve just picked them yesterday.”

Eva leaned her upper body out of the window and looked around. Perhaps due to her pouting lips, the originally deep smile lines further emphasised the traces of time.

She wasn’t worried about it because it was an expensive seedling. Apparently, eating the buds of buttercups would improve one’s eyesight. It was only effective when the buds were picked as soon as they bloomed and pounded to become medicine, but at this rate, it would all rot before she could serve it as medicine to the Madam.

Looking at Eva with a pitying gaze, Jude agreed before changing the conversation topic.

“While I was drinking tea yesterday, I heard Lania say that she isn’t from the west.”

“Yes, she was born in the Western Kingdom.”

“Over there has something… I heard that some people opened their eyes after eating something called the Valley Flower. I heard that even a dead dragon would instantly lift their eyelids.”

“Is that real? Isn’t it a superstition?”

“I wasn’t too sure as well, but when I asked the others, the Western Kingdom seems to have medicinal herbs that were quite famous.”

Eva brushed a hand against her plump chin and nodded.

“Well, Lania isn’t the type of girl that would joke in this manner. What was it called?”

“Valley Flower. I heard that Lania went to the market during her previous vacation to look for it, but it was difficult to import it into the Empire. It’s quite expensive.”

“Valley Flower…”

“Let’s try to look for it. If it’s the Lord, it would be easy for him to find it… You’d never know. The Madam’s eyes may become better if she consumes it.”

Afterwards, Jude reached her hand into her clothes. She seemed to be looking for something, before taking a small box out from her underwear.

“This. It’s licorice candy. Madam said that she wanted to eat it a few days ago while we were playing cat’s cradle, so I bought it while I was at the candy store. Can you pass it on to the Madam, Eva?”

“Did you buy this all for her? Oh dear… she could have just purchased it.”

“It seemed that she was embarrassed to ask me to buy it as only commoners would eat it.”

Jude smiled awkwardly while handing the box containing candy over. Her usual bold appearance disappeared, and left the room quickly after saying that she’lol go and clean the stairs with reddened ears.

Watching her retreating back, Eva pulled out the box of candy from her pocket and shook gently. The sound of candy bumping into each other resounded clearly from within the box.

“The Madam is quite popular.”

Other than the licorice candy that Jude had given her, her pockets were filled to the brim with various items that the other maids had given her. A panacea that was handed down for generations, pills from the Eastern continent, spices that were good for eyes and various medicinal herbs were gathered together, her pockets became heavy.

The prickly treatment from the maids had all but disappeared, and they all treated the Countess like she was a precious lamb.

While the maids of the mansion were undoubtedly treating the Madam unusually, it was hard for her to reach a conclusion. They weren’t treating her rudely… most of them seemed to be looking at her like she was a strange creature. Pitiful yet amusing.

To borrow Maria’s words, “She’s cute because all of the things she did weren’t done well.” When Eva recalled her words, she seemed to have understood her meaning and couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Head Maid!”

Vieta, the Madam’s dedicated handmaiden, came running over with an anxious expression on her face and a tray in hand. In the middle of the tray sat a bowl containing pitch-black soup. Due to the nasty smell, it was probably medicine.

“Have you perhaps seen the Madam? She was definitely in the room a while ago, but she disappeared while I was getting the medicine.”

“No, I’ve been going around to check on the cleaning, and didn’t see the Madam. Did she run away again?”

“Yes. I guess that she doesn’t want to take her medicine.”

Oh, dear. At the same old shtick being uttered, Eva began to pace through the hallway quickly. She was hiding inside the fireplace yesterday, where would she be hiding today?

Lost in thought, Eva snapped her fingers and headed towards a certain direction quickly. The location she was heading towards was the Lord’s office.

“Lord, may I have a moment?”

When she opened the door, Berthwald was seated at his desk, placed his pen onto the pen-holder and raised his head. He raised a finger to push up his glasses and tilted his head.

“I’m quite busy, but what is it?”

“My apologies for disturbing you while you’re so busy, but… I was wondering if the Madam was here.”

“No, I was settling official matters alone. I told Leo to not come in since he was busy. My wife should be in her room, so what brings you all the way here…”

As Berthwald was about to continue his speech with a reproachful tone, he noticed the tray Vieta was holding and his words trailed off. The medicine that was giving off a strange smell. The dedicated handmaiden holding that and the head maid. Understanding the situation, Berthwald let out a sigh and stood from his position.

“Did no one see where she went?”

“Yes. I was looking for where she had gone, but… I thought that she’d come out if the Lord was calling for her.”

After a moment of agonising, Berthwald brushed back his hair and moved out.

She wouldn’t have gone outside as it’s raining…It’s more likely that she’s somewhere within the mansion.

She crawled out of the fireplace yesterday. She’s quite a smart woman, so she wouldn’t have hidden at the same place again.

The Countess, who was shameless and didn’t know decency, hid in an unimaginable place in order to shake off the maids. However, there would always be a person above someone, and Berthwald, who was accustomed to Ariel’s tricks, would be able to find the place she hid in immediately.

Walking ahead with large strides, Berthwald at an unexpected place.