I Want to Die One Day Before You - Chapter 2.13
“Sarubia.”
“Yes, Rufus?”
“There is something I have always wanted to ask.”
“What is it?”
“What exactly does it mean when you predict death?”
Looking at Sarubia lying beside him, Rufus asked with a low voice.
“…” Sarubia watched Rufus with a faint smile.
What was she thinking? Rufus looked at the woman lying next to him. The sign of the saint was dimly visible under the hem of the robe hung over her shoulders.
A saint who can prophesy death… Rufus didn’t know what it was like to see death. Therefore, he was curious about the unique magic, that predicted the passing of his grandmother.
“I can… look into a person’s eyes to take a glimpse at their last moment.”
“Both eyes?”
“Yes, I must see their eyes… both eyes.” Sarubia slowly opened her mouth.
“To predict death is to say what I see and feel about death. I can see how a person’s soul leaves the person’s body, their last moment.”
“Then, you know how my grandmother dies.”
“…yes.”
How does she die? How does his grandmother takes her last breath and close her eyes?
He had a burning desire to ask. But he had already been rejected once before, so he couldn’t even think of asking Sarubia again.
“There is no way she is going to die in pain,” Rufus muttered to himself.
“…”
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There is no answer as expected. Sarubia’s refusal to answer was because she knew the answer would distress Rufus.
“If we know death, we could also know how to prevent it.” Rufus opened his mouth with a sliver of last hope.
“For example, suppose my grandmother walks down the street and is attacked by a beast and dies. So if she doesn’t go the way that the beast comes out, won’t my grandmother live?”
“Death isn’t that simple.” Sarubia spoiled his hope. “What I’ve seen is a person’s future. Every future is fixed. Knowing the future doesn’t change the future. “
“But… is it completely impossible?”
In fact, Rufus also vaguely knew the answer. Humans cannot interfere with fate. No matter how extraordinary, even a saint with unique magic cannot take action against fate. Asking questions to Sarubia in this way now is no different than forcing answers to the impossible.
Nevertheless, he had no choice but to constantly, boringly hanging on, and indistinctly confirm it. Never giving up, just in case there is a tiny piece of hope.
“…I don’t really know either.” Sarubia closed her eyes. “I instinctively feel that I shouldn’t interfere with the future.”
“By instinct?”
“Well, there’s no more appropriate expression. I don’t know, but I feel like something bad is going to happen if I try to interfere with someone else’s death.”
Along with the words, Sarubia thought of Rufus’ grandmother, Baroness Inferna. She traced the last moments of the baroness when she used her unique skill.
A blazing fire, a raging crowd, and a frosty blue iron; the body of Baroness Inferna, who became the centre of it all, fell to the ground.
The end of Baroness Inferna was harrowing, sad, and most of all, miserable.
What would happen if she tried to stop her from dying?
Sarubia imagined the predicted death of Baron Inferna and tried to save her. The vision of running to the place where Baroness Inferna will fall, pushing the baroness and saving her…
‘Ack!’
At that moment, Sarubia screamed silently. It hurt like a poison arrow stuck in her heart. Her limbs rattled, her arms and legs shook uncontrollably. An unpleasant sensation began to spread through her spine.
“Sarubia? What’s wrong?”
Surprised, Rufus looked at Sarubia’s complexion.
“Oh, nothing. It’s suddenly cold,” Sarubia shrugged and raised her head, “Oh, that’s right! I’ll tell you about your death! Aren’t you curious?” When Rufus showed signs of concern, Sarubia hurriedly turned the topic.
His death? Rufus paused for a moment.
“I don’t want to know much about that.”
“Why? It’s not such a bad death.” Sarubia smiled brightly and comforted Rufus on the shoulder.
“You’ll live a long, long, long life. But strangely enough, you don’t look that old. And you die while wearing strange clothes. The end!”
“Strange clothes…?”
“Yes, because in your death I saw you were wearing a very bizarre-looking outfit.” Sarubia nodded. “It was black from head to toe, and it had many fancy decorations… Anyway, it was a weird outfit.”
“…what the hell am I going to do with my life?”
“Don’t be too discouraged. You may just be wearing something that will become fashionable later.”
Sarubia recalled the last moments of Rufus, which she saw three years ago. She had used her prediction to spy on the deaths of many people, but Rufus’ death was one of the most curious deaths she had ever seen.
She pondered over his last moments several times, but so far she hasn’t understood. Where and why does Rufus die in such a way?
“Sarubia.” Rufus turned towards Sarubia. “I’m sorry to keep asking you questions, but let me ask you one last thing,” Rufus took a deep breath. “When I died, where and what were you doing?”
That’s when Sarubia smiled brightly: “Rufus, do you know why I asked you to kiss me three years ago?”
“You said I was handsome.”
“There’s that too, but you really won’t refute that you’re good-looking until the end.” Sarubia sighed theatrically. “That’s right. You… you were uselessly handsome. But there was a more important reason.”
Then she added: “You were holding my hand when you died.”
With her words, there was an awkward smile, and it took him a while to figure out the meaning.
In the midst of Sarubia’s glimpse of Rufus’ death, the future Rufus held Sarubia’s hand and looked at her. And he never stopped until his final breath.
“That’s when I realized that you are the man who will be with me for the rest of his life.”
“Ah…”
That’s right. That’s what it was. Rufus now realized why Sarubia suddenly asked for a kiss that day. Sarubia was already aware.
‘You are my destiny.’
She already knew that a man named Rufus and a woman named Sarubia were together until death.
“If I had held your hand when I died, I guess I’m going to die before you.”
“Maybe, you are probably right.”
“I’m happy,” said Rufus, quietly whispering. “Good thing I died before you.”
“Why?”
‘Because a day without you would be hell.’
After swallowing those words, Rufus pulled Sarubia into his arms.
The light in the room went out, and darkness crept over the room.
If I die,
I’ll become a drop of rain.
I’ll wash away your tears.
Sarubia’s lullaby quietly echoed in the room.