I Will Disappear, Grand Duke - Chapter 74

Fernan, who raised his head in that state, looked straight into her eyes.

 

It was a broken gaze, with only darkness dwelling all over it, where the shaking disappeared.

 

Julia opened her lips with an astonished expression.

 

“What…”

 

Before she could even speak, Fernan straightened his body. Looking at the back of him who turned around and walked out without hesitation, Julia went blank. After Fernan left the room, only then did she come to her senses and followed him.

 

“…Your Highness!”

 

Julia hurriedly tried to catch up to him, but Fernan did not look back and turned around the end of the hallway at once.

 

As they entered the deck, heavy raindrops were pouring down mercilessly.

 

Fernan walked through the rain and approached Cedric, who had been captured by the knights.

 

There was no hesitation in the gesture of pulling the sword out of the sheath around his waist.  A sharp blade was pointed at the neck of Cedric, who was kneeling on his knees.

 

“…no!”

 

At that moment, Julia, who ran out onto the deck, shouted.

 

The moment Fernan raised his sword, she rushed to him and grabbed his arm.

 

“Stop it!  Why, why do you want to harm an innocent person!”

 

At her desperate words, Fernan stopped his movement. Taking advantage of the gap, Julia blocked him.

 

There was a clear intent to kill in his darkened eyes. Indeed, he really was trying to kill Cedric.

 

At this moment, Julia felt a distant emptiness.

 

She thought this man had changed a little. She thought he might be thinking about her sincerely.

 

So she held her feeble expectations.

 

Even if she left without a word, maybe he would understand.

 

Maybe he would notice her desire to be free from her family…

 

But now she knew. This man would never let her go for any reason.

 

Julia raised her head and looked up at him, still holding her sword.

 

“I will go.  I will be by your side.”

 

“…  ”

 

“Leave Cedric alone. Don’t hurt him.”

 

At the end of her voice, who muttered in despair, a cry was mixed.

 

Fernan’s eyes, which had gone black, began to tremble at the soft tears that welled up in the corners of her eyes.

 

While he paused, Julia turned and approached Cedric.

 

At that moment, Fernan slowly lowered his hand and dropped his sword on the floor.

 

“I’m sorry, Cedric.  because of me… .”

 

“Julia……  ”

 

Julia, who tried hard to swallow her tears, began to loosen the rope that was tied to Cedric’s wrist. Cedric looked at her anxiously.

 

Fernan couldn’t move, as if stuck in place, putting her image in his eyes.  Again, it was as if an invisible solid wall was built between Julia and him.

 

Just like when he found her a long time ago. She had her back to him which was so far away.

 

The difference from then was that he could no longer let Julia go.

 

“… Julia.”

 

Fernan murmured to Yulia, who wasn’t even looking at him.  But Julia did not look back.  She was just struggling to free the man in front of her.

 

A heavy rain fell on Julia.  It was not known whether she was crying, or if the rain was pouring on her face.

 

Julia’s hand slipped several times as the tightly bound rope could not be loosened easily. As he stared blankly at her, Fernan approached her with belatedly focused eyes.

 

He took off his jacket and put it on her shoulders, holding her struggling hand. Then, Julia raised her reddened eyes and looked up at him.

 

“Release him.”

 

Fernan, who commanded the knight standing next to him, lowered his body to Julia.  Holding her as she was, he slowly lifted her body up.

 

Only after seeing the knight free Cedric did her stiff breathing begin to return to normal.

 

“…  Please send Cedric away right in front of me.”

 

Julia muttered in a weak voice.  Her wet, droopy body felt no weight. It was as if he was holding something empty inside.

 

Fernan nodded at the knight as if telling the knight to do as Julia asked.

 

And he held Julia in his arms even deeper to the point of tenacity.

 

As per Julia’s request, Cedric was released in front of her sight.

 

Seeing Cedric who couldn’t leave his position even after the rope was loosened, Julia muttered as if crying.

 

“I’m sorry, Cedric, I’m fine, so you don’t have to help me anymore…”

 

Seeing Julia, who could only say sorry to him over and over again, Cedric stretched out his hand, but was immediately stopped by the knights.

 

After Julia asked him to leave several times, Cedric finally turned around.

 

Until the very end, it was only causing trouble for Cedric. In less than a day, the escape came to an end in vain.

 

Julia returned to the mansion as she was.

 

As she was held in Fernan’s arms, she barely opened her blinking eyelids.

 

She didn’t say a word the whole time he was moving.

 

The rain, which was thought was a shower, did not stop, and both entered the mansion soaking wet.

 

The sound of heavy wet footsteps echoed through the quiet mansion. Fernan went up the stairs silently and headed straight to Julia’s bedroom.

 

Squeak, the door opened and he entered and sat Julia down on her bed.

 

While Julia stared helplessly at the floor, Fernan knelt down on one knee in front of her.

 

The jacket, which she was wearing, fell to the floor. Then Fernan began to unbutton her blouse one by one.

 

When the top was opened halfway, Julia raised her hand and stopped him.

 

“…  That’s okay.”

 

Fernan, whose eyes without a single light, looked up at her. Julia, who looked at him like that, sighed in the distance.

 

It was her who was brought in, but on the contrary, this man had a face that looked like he was about to die.

 

Julia endured the throbbing headache and took his hand off.

 

Because she was wearing a robe, the underclothes were not wet.  Rather, it was Fernan who got soaked from his clothes to his hair.

 

Julia got up slowly, looking at the dripping rain from him, and came back with a cloth.

 

As she placed the cloth on his face, who was still kneeling, Fernan’s eyes began to tremble violently.

 

“Why……  ”

 

He barely opened his mouth and grabbed Julia’s wrist.  The recoil caused the cloth to fall to the floor.  Fernan finally got up.  With her gaze rising in an instant, Julia looked at him without a word.

 

Then he lowered his head again and put her hand on his shirt.

 

Fernan’s face began to contort as she unbuttoned his wet shirt one by one.

 

“Why are you doing this…  Huh?”

 

“I’ll tell the servant to bring you new clothes.”

 

Julia, who lightly ignored his words, loosened the last button.  The wet muscles were exposed through the open shirt.

 

Turning around, Julia went out the door and told the servant to bring new towels and clothes.

 

Fernan was just looking at her with bewildered eyes. It was like he was asking why she was not complaining.

 

Why was she trying to take off his clothes and dry his body herself?

 

Leaving behind all those questions, Julia, who had received the towels and clothes from the servant, approached him again.  When she opened a large towel to wipe his body, Fernan immediately grabbed her hand and pulled her towards him.

 

As he led her to the bed in that state, her soft body lay helplessly on the bed.

 

Fernan murmured in a trembling voice.

 

“Julia, curse me…..”

 

“…  ”

 

“Tell me to get lost, tell me to die. Tell me you don’t want to see me, tell me to disappear. Tell me you hate me and resent me…”

 

Julia looked up at him from afar.

 

He seemed ready to receive all the resentment and hatred from her.

 

Naturally, she couldn’t help but resent this man who blocked her path.

 

She knew she had to get angry, and not accept him like this.

 

However, Julia wanted to let go of all those painful feelings.

 

To hate him again……  She didn’t even think about it because she was so exhausted both physically and mentally.

 

Yes, she was really tired now.  If she couldn’t leave no matter what she did, she would rather live in compliance.

 

So, the thought of wanting to help drying this man without knowing was probably an extension of that mind.

 

….Not wanting to leave this dangerous-looking man alone.

 

“Are you doing this for fear that I might take him back and kill him?”

 

Fernan painfully twisted his eyes. He seemed to think that she was doing this only to save Cedric.

 

Julia slowly lowered her eyelids and murmured.

 

“Think however you want.”

 

After a brief pause, Julia raised her gaze again and spoke slowly.

 

“I’ll stay still here until Your Highness wants me to.”

 

“…  ”

 

“I’ll do everything. That’s it.”

 

The voice that continued to flow was plain.There wasn’t a single bit of hatred towards him.

 

Fernan looked down at her and twisted his lips slightly. Julia was saying anything to save the priest.

 

She simply stayed by his side to protect the priest. That was how Fernan interpreted Julia’s words. So those words once again brought deep despair to him.

 

Julia stared at his eyes, which had begun to turn red, with an unrealistic expression.

 

A stream of water that could not be wiped off flowed from his trembling chin.

 

Staring at him, she implicitly stretched out her hand.

 

After wiping away the water by stroking his chin with her soft hand, Julia slowly removed her hand.

 

At that time, Fernan immediately grabbed her hand.  He opened his mouth as he interlocked her fingers.

 

“….Do anything.”

 

“… ”

 

“Then don’t leave me forever.  Stay by my side until I die.”

 

A harsh deep voice and red, bloodshot eyes.  Contrary to the fierce momentum, his expression was miserable.

 

“No matter where you go, I’ll find you. I might really kill that man then.”

 

“…  ”

 

“So, please…  ”

 

Swallowing his words with misery, he looked at Julia’s sparkling blue eyes.

 

After making eye contact with her for a long time, Julia averted her gaze.

 

She saw his ripped muscles and the scars through the open shirt.

 

Traces that would not disappear no matter how much time passed.

 

She looked at his face, which seemed more painful than the traces of war, and finally looked into his eyes again.

 

Fernan, who had been following her gaze tenaciously, finally met her eyes and kissed her as if rushing to her.

 

Julia did not push him away even with a kiss as rough as if he would swallow her whole.