I’d Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please - Chapter 169

After Miss Masher’s latest round of grumblings, Jonathan looks down at himself, then over at Lucas.

“Um, w-what about just doing the, um, f-fitted version of what we’re w-wearing now..? Is there a, uh, tag with a style number we can check..?” While Jonathan is making this proposal, he unbuttons his suit jacket and goes to look at the lower part of the inner side seam starting with his left, but has no success.

“Ah, all the enhanced suits are tagless, even when they’re the standard-sized ready-to-wear versions. The different patterns on the inner lining are what show which material enhancements it has, otherwise, the bots all just have the different cuts memorized to know which product it is that they’re selling. No need to worry about someone attempting to do a ticket swap that way, either. There was just the little detachable tag to indicate size, and show the price for shoppers, but the bots don’t even scan that. Here, while I don’t have all of them memorized, I’m pretty sure I know which one you guys have on, just let me see the lower back to be sure.” Once Mikah completes his info sharing and then extending his offer, he stands up and walks around the desk.

‘Ugh, I’d hate to imagine not having a network backing you up while needing to have all those little differences memorized. Does make sense for a buncha bots, though…’

“Oh, um, sure..?” Jonathan answers while standing up, before Lucas has even has shifted his position in the slightest. While he is turning around to show Mikah the basic unembellished single vent backside of his suit jacket, Miss Masher’s thoughtful hum can be heard through the phone.

“Ya know, I honestly don’t really remember any actual details about the suits ya two are even wearin’… Just… That they’re, uh, normal black suits?” When Miss Masher makes this confession, Miss Chievous snorts.

“Then isn’t that exactly what you want? Too boring for me though, hmm… Ah, but I can’t go too crazy though, Mary won’t want the same one then…” After saying this, it becomes Miss Chievous’s turn to start grumbling.

Once Mikah has made his visual assessment, he half leans, half sits on the edge of his desk, instead of bothering to walk back around to sit down in his chair again.

“As I thought, they’re a 47B. Uh, I’m sure a bot is currently working with you two over there, right?” Hearing Mikah come to this conclusion, Jonathan sits back down in the same seat he was occupying previously.

“Yes sir. Unit M6-11 reporting. Bringing up the details for a 47B style suit for their convenience now.” When diligent ol’ 11 responds, Mikah gains a small smile.

“Oh, actually, if Marsha likes it, put the order in for a C instead, since you’re already going to put the time and money into having it custom tailored, might as well go for a double vent instead of just a single. I’m sure she’d appreciate the extra flexibility, even if the fabric has a good amount of give as it is.” After Mikah adds this on, Lucas nods a few times, whereas poor Jonathan just looks confused.

Judging by the two inquisitive hums accompanying 11’s response of “Very well sir, understood.” it doesn’t seem that Miss Masher nor Miss Chievous are any better informed than Jonathan is on the matter.

Upon noticing Jonathan’s confusion, Lucas gestures towards the backside of his right hip with his thumb, which is his side closer to Jonathan.

“That’s what the split part is called, a vent. When ya got one on each side it makes it easier to move around an’ stuff since it’s less stiff. Havin’ two uses more fabric and is harder to do right, though, so they’re usually more expensive. But, yeah, like Mikah said, if yer already spending the money to have it custom tailored, why settle for just the one? When yer just wearin’ a jacket because you gotta, an’ ya don’t care about it bein’ a real good one, you’ll usually just save the money, though.” With Lucas’s explanation, Jonathan’s confusion clears up pretty quickly.

‘Heh, like at my old job. Like hell I’d have wasted a dime more than I had to on that damn shitty corporate monkey suit.’

Mikah has an amused expression as he looks at Lucas with a raised eyebrow, but he doesn’t pry any further regarding his mental addition.

“Oh, yeah, that makes sense. Yeah, I’ll get that one, that’ll work. Uh, thanks, guys. Oh fuck, that’s a lot of color options. No, no, just black. The plain one. Yeah, that one. Fuck, I gotta pick out the buttons too? Uhh, yeah, those. …Oh, now I gotta go get some nice shirts to wear with it, don’t I? Ehhh…” Miss Masher’s lack of enthusiasm regarding additional shopping is all too apparent, and Mikah barely stifles a chuckle of amusement from her blunt honesty.

Lucas’s face lights up with realization, and he balls up his right hand into a fist, slamming it down against his left palm.

“Right! Duh, you guys need the full outfits. Uhh, pick out a week’s worth of shirts each, and uhh, two..? Fuck it, three pairs of shoes each. …You probably don’t want ties though, yeah? Wait, I figure the dress shirts bein’ tailor-fitted isn’t a problem, but, what about the shoes though?” At the tail end of Lucas’s extension of his proposed purchase offer, he looks over at Mikah with an uncertain expression.

“Oh, right, you probably didn’t even visit floors 4 through 6, did you? Even if the sizes aren’t quite right, there will be plenty of appropriate styles for them to choose from. A custom shoe order won’t be a problem, but it could take a while, is all. But, there is actually a decent chance that there will be shoes in stock that will fit their needs. Some of the boy’s lines should be small enough, the question then is if the shape and fit are still right.” Mikah is facing Lucas at first while answering, but then he shifts his attention down to Lucas’s phone resting on top of his desk before continuing.

“Ah, considering how it sounds like you aren’t terribly concerned with the fashion of it all, I’m sure you could leave the order open to the designers, maybe with a few specifications or restrictions in place. Honestly, you’ll get a bunch of shirts extra, that way. Especially since your sizing would be unique, so they’d have nothing else to do with the design samples anyway, and then the ones you like from the lot they’ll make a fresh one out of enhanced materials, maybe with a little improvement or embellishment or two.” Upon Mikah making this offer, Miss Masher makes a comically exaggerated sigh of relief through the phone.

“Yes! Perfect! Do that! Er, wait, they, uhh, won’t get in trouble if they make stuff I don’t like, right..?” Initially, Miss Masher vehemently agrees with Mikah’s proposal, but trails off with a wary tone after considering the fact that she probably won’t like the majority of what they come up with. Crazy artsy types, putting form over function, and all that.

—–

Lucas total kills: 7

Lucas total deaths: 11

Lucas total assists: 1

Lucas current GDV: 17.32 (+.01 +.01 = +.02 net change)

Lucas’s fame level: 5.0* (Already beginning to receive authentic global attention. His local levels are effectively maxed.)

Lucas’s hero suspicion level: 2.5* (More than just passing suspicion for many paranoid individuals, numerous people have realized he’s an impulsive idiot.)

Jonathan total kills: 7

Jonathan total deaths: 2

Jonathan current GDV: 6.00 (+.01 net change)

Jonathan’s fame level: 2.75* (What fame he does have is predominantly local.)

Jonathan’s hero suspicion level: 3.0* (More than just overly-paranoid people are suspicious at this point.)

Willy’s fame level: 1.5* (Anonymous meme fame, local fame primarily as ‘Xenoclast’s dog’, but some strangers know him as William/Willy now.)

Supervillain social circle size: 15

—–

Little character theater:

Jonathan’s attention has started to wander, and he’s stuck debating if it would be too rude to pull his phone out to amuse himself while this conversation continues.

Willy was a bit curious about the customization options selection process, and he had stood up on his hind legs to try to get a look at the computer terminal. Noticing these actions on his part, Miss Masher had gently picked him up, holding him so he could look at the screen alongside her while she was making her choices with 11’s assistance.

Lucas, briefly lost in thought: ‘Aww, what would it take to convince them to go an’ make a buncha stuff just for me..? Eh, who am I kiddin’? They’d more likely do that for Jon.’

427, mentally sighing for the umpteenth time, all thanks to Lucas’s earlier unbridled thoughts regarding being a cheapskate about his old work suit in his original life: ‘Sure, having him guess you’re from another world would be a huge stretch, but you should at least try to be a little covert about it! Who knows what bizarre and troublesome assumptions people might come to after piecing some of your strange clues together!?’

Author, cracking a grin, with their arms crossed over their chest: Eheh, yeah 427, who knows, indeed?

Mr. Quacks, currently scoping out the design studio, watching three human designers trying to figure out how the hell to convert some of their suit designs into being high-coverage yet still aesthetically pleasing for a scrawny-ass greyhound, while two service bots are attempting to construct a dress form built with Willy’s dimensions: Quack…?