I’d Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please - Chapter 213

While the first bot is still busy with conducting its equipment salvage operations, the second bot walks over upon noticing Lucas putting away his phone.

“Greetings esteemed guest. While our establishment’s owner is not present at this time, he wishes to pass along his heartfelt gratitude as well as an offer to discuss compensation for your efforts at your convenience.” As the bot is speaking, it holds out a business card to Lucas.

Its actions bring Lucas’s attention back up from the confectionary case and he accepts the card.

“Oh, sweet. Hey, couldya pack up everything that’s still fine to eat? As long as it’s not contaminated or got any glass shards in it or somethin’ like that. I’ll buy em all. Not like ya guys should be open till this gets cleaned up anyway, yeah? So, no point wasting perfectly good snacks…” While Lucas is saying this, the first bot rotates its head in the middle of re-assembling the Point of Sale terminal to stare at him.

The second bot’s outward reaction is to merely bow slightly and then collect a few cake and cookie boxes to get to work. “Certainly, sir.”

It even takes his instructions to its digital heart, diligently examining each item before either boxing it or setting it aside for the dumpsters.

[…I know full well that you just wanted an excuse to get everything and not need to decide what you want to eat, but even still you earned a minor task’s worth of GDV for that.]

‘Fuck yeah, two for one deal!’

[…]

After staring for a few seconds, the first bot turns its attention back to its technical assembly, resuming its work.

Lucas idly pulls his phone back out while looking the card over.

‘Ya think they’ll at least give me a discount? Not like they’d reliably have anything left to sell if it wasn’t for me, Jon, and the girlies, yeah?’

[I’d certainly think so. I imagine this store operates on lean profit margins, and they could probably use the upfront funds to help repair the damages incurred. As you said, they shouldn’t stay open while the shop is in this shape, so selling the entire remaining inventory, even at discount, is money that they were probably already prepared to write off as a loss.]

‘Huh… Hey, everything in this world is basically debit, yeah? Credit doesn’t really work when ya can’t exactly enforce makin’ someone pay ya back?’

[For the most part, yes. Loans are either based on an atypically high level of trust, or they are enforced by enhanced loan sharks. Aggressively. Pre-war credit structures were completely ruined before it was even over and they were never reliably rebuilt.]

‘Oh, oh oh! So dependin’ on how much they need, I could loan ‘em some cash up front, then make ‘em pay me back with a bunch of interest and favors, but they might actually agree to it because there aren’t any better options!?’

[Er… Yes. You haven’t been shy about being both wealthy and powerful, so they wouldn’t even necessarily consider it all that strange. Just opportunistic, on your part. They may even think that the only reason you helped was for that express purpose. The interest on the money needed to repair the windows alone would certainly be sufficient motivation.]

‘Niiice. Hey, start doin’ the math on what we can afford to loan out and what kinda interest would be right for it, kay thanks.’

[…Of course.]

Lucas has a grin while he creates the new contact entry in his phone courtesy of the business card. While the owner’s name is written as ‘Heat-Wave’ on the card, Lucas enters his contact info in as ‘MONEY’.

Upon the entry being completed, but before he goes to make the call, Lucas turns around to address his companions. He catches sight of the remnants of the front door swinging shut while Jonathan is nowhere to be seen, Miss Chievous struggling not to laugh, and Miss Masher standing only a few feet away from him with a grin while holding up their late opponent’s severed arm.

“Oh, son of a bitch! It was funny when it was George, but when it’s actually a real arm that’s just sick! The fuck!?” Lucas’s visible disgust and subconscious half of a step back makes Miss Chievous absolutely lose it, hunching forward with her hands on her knees laughing hysterically.

Miss Masher’s smile broadens a bit, but she only laughs a little as she lowers the severed limb. The ruined remnants of the wrecked wrist sway more loosely than the rest of the arm.

“Hey, it’s better than bringin’ the whole body back to give Calc a blood sample. Not like we have any better way of carryin’ it around.” Miss Masher’s explanation helps Lucas visibly relax, though his nose is still wrinkled distastefully.

“I mean… I guess. Oh, right, as I was gonna say, put your drink orders in, I’m gonna make a call real quick.” Upon Lucas saying this, he turns away so he doesn’t have to look at Miss Masher’s gorey toy.

The first bot stops its register repairs to walk over to face Miss Masher when it overhears Lucas mentioning making a beverage order.

“Oh yeah, one sec, lemme pull up their text…” Miss Masher slings the arm over her shoulder, letting its bent elbow hold it in place as she pulls out her phone, paying no mind to the blood dripping from the limb onto her clothes.

That poor tank is going to need a lot of hydrogen peroxide if it ever wants to be white again.

Meanwhile, going back a few moments to when Jonathan left the cafe to meet up with the rest of the group milling in front of MF’s Fashion Boutique…

They’re standing in a loose circle, and Jonathan joins the group across from Dan, between Miss Calculated and 23, just behind Willy.

“H-hello.” Jonathan raises up a hand to wave timidly, not really taking into account the fact he’s currently missing his jacket, showing off multiple blood splatters across his dress shirt. It’s a bit of a stark contrast with how neatly said shirt is tucked into his pants, showing off an unhealthily lean waistline.

Dan blinks a few times at his sudden appearance, whereas Miss Calculated jumps and gasps, Mark flinches, and the older gentleman with them looks briefly taken aback before smoothing out his expression. 23 is completely unphased, and Willy makes a small yelp before turning to look at him, then starts wagging his tail.

Miss Calculated sighs as she holds a hand over her heart, turning to look at him.

“You would think I’d be accustomed to people suddenly appearing after dealing with Chi for so long… Hello Jonathan. Er, is everything okay..?” While Miss Calculated is speaking, she notices Jonathan’s post-murder state.

He rapidly nods a few times, then points diagonally across the intersection towards the cafe.

“Y-yeah. We’re all fine. Chi just, um, g-got a few scratches. A guy was, um, b-being a jerk. But we t-took care of him.” As Jonathan aims the group’s attention in the direction of the cafe, Miss Chievous’s hysterical laughter can be heard ringing out through the noise of the traffic going through the busy intersection.

Miss Calculated snorts, but starts smiling.

“It can’t be that bad of an injury, I suppose.” Miss Calculated turns her gaze from the cafe back to Jonathan, still smiling.

Jonathan, however, has turned to look at Mark. Surprisingly, he’s now dressed in a navy blue suit with white pinstripes, grey dress shoes, and has on only light makeup.

He determined that the daring dust-decorated dress didn’t deserve de-fuzzing for dinner. And his feet still hurt.

“W-we, um, n-need a few minutes. B-but, then we should be ready for dinner.” Upon Jonathan diligently reporting their status, Mark gains a smile of his own and nods at him.

“Ah, right. We’re going to Pie Palace, and we’ll be leaving shortly. Take your time, we’ll see you there.” As soon as Mark is done speaking, Jonathan nods twice and darts back to the cafe.

The older gentleman within the group barks out a laugh as he zooms away.

“I still have yet to meet a single phys supe that could be considered a normal person!” He chuckles a few times once he’s finished saying this, and Mark makes a snort of amusement.

Miss Calculated is struggling to stifle her laughter.

—–

Lucas’s total kills: 9

Lucas’s total deaths: 12

Lucas’s total assists: 1

Lucas’s current GDV: 19.22 [+.1 +.01 +.01 = .12 net change]

Lucas’s fame level: 7.0* [The VoDs of the stream are starting to circulate, just not enough to move the needle, yet.]

Lucas’s hero suspicion level: 1.0*

Jonathan’s total kills: 8

Jonathan’s total deaths: 4

Jonathan’s current GDV: 8.10 [+.01 +.01 = +.02 net change]

Jonathan’s fame level: 5.5*

Jonathan’s hero suspicion level: 1.5*

Willy’s fame level: 5.5*

Mr. Quacks’s fame level: 6.0*

Supervillain social circle size: 16 (+1, Heat-Wave)

—–

Little character theater:

Jonathan, unsure why Miss Chievous is laughing so hard, but too afraid to ask: Um…

Willy, looking over at the cafe, up at Miss Calculated, then back at the cafe again: Bark..?

Lucas is trying his absolute hardest to ignore Miss Chievous’s laughter as he starts the call to MONEY, er, Heat-Wave.

427, diligently running multiple sets of calculations: [You should decide if you’re trying to milk this as much as you can for profit, or to actually be considerate with your rates to earn some GDV.]

Author, looking over their char sheet document with 55 entries: Me too, Abe. Me too.

Mr. Quacks and Quackette took over where the tech-tending robot left off, reconnecting a few wires that were damaged: Quack!