If I Can’t Be Your Wife - Chapter 82

Her body felt heavy as she sank into the abyss.

 

– No!

 

His desperate voice echoed in her ears. Perhaps her memories and time had been lost into the cracked ground as only that sound kept replaying in her head.

 

They said that shortly before death, the memories of your life would pass by, one by one. So she couldn’t understand why no other memory came up.

 

‘Live…….!’

 

His arm swung as if he wanted to go after her. But his body did not move and Kathleen remained still for a long time. She could not hear nor speak and felt so far away. It was hard to tell whether she was dead or alive.

 

She had no idea how much time had passed. Her eyelids opened unexpectedly.

 

‘…….not dead.’

 

That was the first thought that came to mind as her blurred vision gradually became clearer with time.

 

Should she rejoice that her life had not been taken, or should she be sad? She felt sad. Laying down, she tried to look around her. The room was neat and simple. At least she didn’t seem to have returned to Meyer.

 

‘Where am I?’

 

The clothes she wore were also strange. They weren’t the Grand Duchess’ clothes nor were they the clothes she wore when she fled. They were comfortable and neat, but it was the first time she had seen such an attire. Kathleen raised her body up to look outside when she saw something fall from her forehead and picked it up. A towel.

 

It was still slightly moist and hadn’t completely dried yet. Just as she was thinking that someone must have been watching over her, the door opened.

 

Reflexively, she looked over in that direction and made eye contact with the person who was coming in.

 

“Ah…….”

 

His pale green eyes opened wide in surprise and then gleamed with delight.

 

“Kelly!”

 

He ran and hugged her tightly.

 

“Joseph…….?”

 

Even though she had been looking for him, it didn’t feel real now that she had finally found him. As she felt the warmth from his arms as he hugged her, Kathleen slowly began to accept that she wasn’t dreaming.

 

“You’ve finally woken up. It’s a relief.”

 

“Joseph, is it really you?”

 

He released her from his embrace and showed her his face in detail when she asked. There was a youthful smile full of joy on his face.

 

“Yes, that’s right. Take a good look.”

 

“How did you get here…….”

 

“Didn’t I promise? We’ll go to the North and live in the Carmine Mountains.”

 

It showed his will to keep his last promise. Kathleen was moved and struggled to suppress her tears.

 

“Thank you. Thank you for keeping your promise.”

 

“No. Kelly came here so we could meet. Rather, I was too late.”

 

Joseph spoke softly and looked at her body.

 

“Is there any pain or discomfort anywhere? You’ve been lying in bed for almost two months.”

 

“That long?”

 

Kathleen asked in surprise.

 

It seemed that she hadn’t woken up for a long time. The situation before she lost consciousness was still as vivid as yesterday so she didn’t realize that so much time had passed.

 

“Yes. I found you and rescued you from the cracks in the ground, and since then you’ve been unconscious. There were no major problems as the wounded area immediately healed, but you can’t tell how worried I was because you wouldn’t open your eyes. It would be good to rest for the time being.”

 

Joseph double-checked her forehead for fever. Kathleen asked, hesitating a little.

 

“Joseph. Do you……. What happened to Luci?”

 

But before she could hear an answer, she saw his eyes quiver and tremble, and Kathleen could guess the answer.

 

‘You couldn’t bring him.’

 

Joseph said in a low voice.

 

“I’m sorry. I wanted to rescue Luci too, but I couldn’t because the knights were covering him.”

 

The thought that she had left her sick child alone broke her heart. If she had known it was going to be like this, she would not have separated from Luci. She only cared about being able to escape and never thought that she would be separated from her child. Tears  welled in her eyes. She knew the situation was unavoidable, but her heart was not easily calmed.

 

‘If we had fallen together, he might have been seriously injured.’

 

She was also injured and didn’t wake up for a long time therefore it would have been worse if she had been with her child. Kathleen repeatedly told herself that it was fortunate. Emily will take good care of Luci, and Edith will be there too, so he won’t be in any danger for a while.

 

‘He won’t hurt the child either.’

 

She wasn’t entirely sure, but his attitude towards Luci had been favorable. She wanted to believe that he wasn’t someone who would harm a child just because she wasn’t there.

She tried to comfort herself by forcing herself to think so, but Joseph helplessly explained.

 

“It was too dangerous to face the armed knights……. You fell to the ground so I rescued you first. Don’t worry though. There have been no avalanches since the earthquake, and Luci is unharmed. There will be a chance to bring him back later.”

 

“Yes……. I understand. But Joseph.”

 

Kathleen found something strange in his words meant to comfort her and asked.

 

“Were you there when I fell in the cracks?”

 

At first she thought he had found her and saved her by accident, but Joseph was talking as if he had seen the scene clearly.

 

“Yes.”

 

Joseph said quietly.

 

“Here, we look for signs of all the people who pass by the Carmine Mountains. Those who simply pass by will be left alone, but those who go deeper will be followed by watchmen. So I found out that Kelly had come here. I was on my way to find you, but then the duke shortly came after.”

 

“I see. But what did you mean by watchmen?”

 

Come to think of it, this place didn’t appear to be a temple. Kathleen realized that there were things that Joseph still had to tell her.

 

“I found them, the Winter Fairies. A person with the same blood as Kelly.”

 

His warm, light-green eyes explained kindly.

 

“I was looking for you with him. He waited a long time for Kelly too.”

 

“Ah……. Then perhaps.”

 

The person I met when I first came to Carmine?

 

Expectations were raised over the question.

 

“That’s right. He is Kelly’s family.”

 

Joseph nodded his head affectionately.

 

“He will be very happy to know that Kelly is awake.”

 

Family.

 

Her heart was beating rapidly as she heard of the existence of something she had desperately wanted in her life. She had been alone since her mother’s death and had always dreamed of having a family of her own, but she never did. It was only after Luci was born that the feeling of being alone in her world disappeared, but still, in the corner of her heart, a faint longing for family remained.

 

But did I really have a family?

 

The fear that had been hidden behind the joy for a moment, even in the excitement, began to stick its head out.

 

‘Maybe they’re wrong. Besides mother, there were several winter fairies who were captured, but if it were someone else’s family, not mother’s…….’

 

Hesitation took precedence. There were many times when she had expectations but realized that she had been mistaken and became severely disappointed as a result.

 

But before she could ask Joseph for details, she heard someone walking down the hallway, and the door opened.

 

“Joseph. Has she still not woken up today? Maybe something is wrong…….”

 

The blue eyes that had stepped inside looked straight at Kathleen. The man with silver hair like her was slenderly tall and had the impression of a young man, but he couldn’t finish his words and stood there blankly.

 

“Cassiel.”

 

Joseph got up hastily and announced.

 

“Kelly is awake.”

 

Seemingly unable to believe, the trembling eyes stared at Kathleen. He ran over to her soon after and hugged her.

 

“You’re awake.”

 

The eager youthful voice touched her. Those words made Kathleen’s eyes tear up.

 

“I’ve been looking for you for a long time. Seeing you again now…….”

 

His hand stroking her hair was so warm that her tears came out.

 

“You really look a lot like Juliana.”

 

“Hic…….”

 

And when her mother’s name came out of his mouth, Kathleen burst into tears. It was because she could feel the assurance that the arm that held her would never be withdrawn again.

 

“I found you too late, but now I will never lose you. I promise.”

 

He comforted Kathleen over and over again like that. She stopped crying after a long time. He laid her back down on the bed before he introduced himself.

 

“I am Cassiel Usmund. I am your mother’s older brother, and to you, I am your uncle.”

 

“He is also the head of the House Usmund.”

 

Joseph added an explanation.

 

“The legends say that all those who were called Winter Fairies belonged to the House of Usmund. However, the only direct descendants are Sir Cassiel and Miss Juliana, Kelly’s mother.”

 

“Silver hair and blue eyes. That is proof that you are a direct descendant of Usmund.”

 

His eyes, as dark as sapphires, were full of affection for his sister’s daughter.

 

“Besides, the blessings we received from God were also passed on through me and Juliana alone.”

 

Cassiel said as he glanced at Kathleen’s hand.

 

“So when I met you then, I thought, maybe you were Juliana’s daughter.”

 

The first time she saw him, she remembered that he was going to ask her something after seeing her ability. The strange feeling at that time was also not an illusion.

 

“If I had known who you were, I would have looked for you sooner, but I was too late. Forgive me.”

 

“I am glad that you are accepting me.”

 

Kathleen could finally say it. She was the daughter of Juliana Usmund as well as the daughter of Everton Winston.

 

When she first met Cassiel, he called her the traitor’s daughter. Count Winston, who was her father, was the one who had kidnapped the Winter Fairies with his vassals, so she thought that he had no choice but to think of her like that as she was someone who inherited his blood. But the kind words continued so those worries were overshadowed.

 

“Don’t say that. You are from Usmund. You are Juliana’s daughter and I also consider you as mine.”

 

But Cassiel was resolute and cleanly cut off Kathleen’s guilt.

 

“You’ve returned safely.”

 

At his words, a warm energy radiated from her chest and overflowed. It seemed that her strong bond with him was finally providing a place for her to step into this world.

 

“Thank you…… Uncle.”

 

At that, Cassiel smiled and clasped her hand.