If Only I Could Disappear - Chapter 12

“Did you say that the empress’ soul and body have been separated…”

The gazes of the people wandered around out of shock. They were at a loss as to how they should react to the series of shocking news.

The first person to speak up was Marianne Rosewood. She, who had rose petals arranged in her copper-coloured hair, frowned and shouted.

“You have quite the light mouth!”

Without losing, Fynn rebutted back sarcastically.

“How long did you intend to keep it under wraps, Marianne? There isn’t a secret in the world that will remain so forever.”

Fynn’s face was still pale and tears were still within her eyes. As a result, she looked like a person that couldn’t go against her conscience and told the truth with difficulty.

“If I’m really pregnant, I thought that I should confess about this. Of course, I should’ve mentioned this at a more suitable occasion… Though I was a little rash…”

As Fynn shrunk and stepped back, Edmund stepped up in front of her at once.

“Hearing you say it like that, Marianne Rosewood, you seem to have known this beforehand. Also…”

Edmund’s black eyes turned towards the wizard.

“Did you say you’re Lehman Periwinkle?”

“Yes, Your Majesty.”

“You’re a wizard that guides souls.”

“Yes, I manage a magic tower in Beatum.”

“Then you must have been the first to know that the empress’ soul has separated from her body. It’s because you entered the country as the empress’ distinguished guest.”

While Lehman was choosing an answer, Marianne protested.

“She will wake up after another period of time. Lady Fynn, who’d overheard that…”

“Finnier Rosewood is the Mendez Empire’s only imperial consort.”

Edmund cut off Marianne’s words coldly.

“Just a few hours ago, she and I had a marriage ceremony and she was given the qualifications to be an imperial consort. If you dare to treat Fynn like a mistress in front of me, I won’t forgive you for a second time.”

“……My apologies, Your Majesty.”

“You said that she could wake up if given time. Can the Master of the Magic Tower guarantee that?”

“……”

Lehman stared at Edmund.

The impression that the emperor gave off was both cold and beautiful. In a sense, he seemed inhuman.

Lehman lowered his amber eyes and responded.

“I can’t guarantee that. But it isn’t completely impossible.”

“This is troubling. I can’t leave the empire’s future up to chance.”

“The empire’s future.”

Marianne said without hiding her sarcastic tone at all.

“So are you going to blame Her Majesty Sotis for that now?”

“A month is already a long wait. It’s time for me to consider the need to wait any further seriously. If her collapse wasn’t just because she was sick, but the separation of her soul, isn’t that a symbol of misfortune?”

“Misfortune…”

As Lehman mulled over that word like he found it absurd, Marianne shouted at Fynn.

“Isn’t this all because of Your Highness? If you didn’t talk about such useless things!”

“Rosewood! What are you doing to someone that might be pregnant?”

With an unfamiliar expression, Marianne looked at Edmund, who was angry.

Ever since she was a child, she entered and exited the Imperial Castle like it was her house. She had even performed in front of the crown prince, who liked playing the piano, so they became close naturally. Edmund liked how Marianna spoke confidently and intelligently with him without being intimidated, and Marianne liked Edmund’s eye, as he understood the value of her performance.

However, their relationship fell apart because Edmund hated Sotis. Marianne began hating Edmund after becoming Sotis’ only friend, as he kept misunderstanding and hating the kind Sotis.

“So you do know how to be angry, Your Majesty.”

Marianne added with a bitter smile.

“You had never been angered when Her Majesty Sotis was being looked down upon, so I thought that Your Majesty wouldn’t be angered for the sake of a woman.”

Edmund paused for a moment, before speaking with a cold voice.

“Do remember that the reason I’m not punishing you severely is because you’re from the same family as my imperial consort, as well as the empress’ only friend.”

Marianne replied to Edmund’s words in a tone that wasn’t grateful at all.

“Yes, my gratitude to you, Your Majesty.”

“……”

“Lord Wizard, come along with me.”

“……Yes.”

Before anyone could stop her, Marianne grabbed Lehman’s arm and left the banquet hall. The people were still wrapping their heads around the newly revealed facts, and just opened a path for the two of them.

Marianne strided off in her high heels unhesitatingly. Rather, Lehman wasn’t able to keep pace with her quick steps and couldn’t only follow behind awkwardly while being in her grasp.

“E—excuse me, Lady Marianne, could you slow down a little……”

“What should we do now?”

After completely leaving the main palace and reaching the path towards the empress’ palace, Marianne looked back while on the verge of tears.

“Lord wizard, what should we do now? Now that the truth has been exposed, the emperor will definitely… He’ll try to depose Her Majesty Sotis. How can I watch that happen? I’m so upset that I’m at a loss of what to do.”

Lehman wanted to maintain his composure no matter what happened, but his face started to distort alongside her. His brown hair fluttered slowly in the breeze, slightly dishevelled from running wildly.

“……Her Majesty would be upset.”

“It’s even more saddening because she’ll smile and say that she knew that would happen.”

“……”

“That’s right, I’d rather…”

Marianne suddenly gripped Lehman’s shoulder.

“Yes! Since divorce is inevitable in any case. Then, why don’t we seek a better life for Her Majesty Sotis?”

“……A better life?”

“Don’t you like Her Majesty.”

Lehman’s face burned at the unpredictable remarks. Not only his cheeks, but also the back of his neck, his ears, and his forehead turned bright red.

“I, I—Is it, v–very obvious?”

“Yes, well. It’s around the level of being plastered all over your forehead?”

“That’s…”

Marianne, who looked at Lehman’s frowning face, smiled.

“I’m just kidding. I’m more quick-witted than most. You seem very composed in front of others, so don’t worry about it too much. But you have good taste, as Her Majesty is a very good person.”

“……”

“Why don’t you be together with Her Majesty Sotis after the divorce?”

“That’s…”

He replied with a sigh.

“……Her Majesty’s opinion is the most important thing.”

“You’re right… But it’s not like you don’t have a chance. I can help you a little if you’re confident that you’ll cherish Her Majesty. “

“She’s still Her Majesty the Empress… Aren’t those words too disrespectful?”

Marianne snorted at Lehman, who was being careful with his words.

“What do you mean disrespectful? It’s far from enough when I think about the mistresses His Majesty Edmund had. Her Majesty didn’t find fault with that either. Look, the empress has collapsed and he doesn’t even pay it any heed, instead wrapping jewelleries around his mistress’ entire body and showing her off to the world.”

From what he’d heard, that seemed to be the case. As it was a political marriage, Edmund was said to have been through many women since his days as the crown prince. Though he couldn’t tell if it was done to ridicule Sotis’s circumstances, or it was because he’d been promiscuous since he was young.

It shouldn’t matter. Lehman nodded briefly.

“In any case, it’s of utmost importance for Her Majesty Sotis to open her eyes. I discovered a potential theory while I was looking through related ancient texts the entire night.”

“And what’s that?”

“First of all, in theory…… After a human dies, its soul will become a butterfly.”

Lehman broke out in cold sweat as he tried to explain complex soul magic as simply as possible.

“A butterfly, you say.”

“Yes. Butterflies are the first creatures that God created in the world, and are like the prototype of souls. Butterflies symbolise souls. A soul that has returned to its original form can see that path it’s supposed to tread, and if it has lost its way, a soul wizard like me can assist it.”

“In that case, is Her Majesty Sotis flying around the room in the form of a butterfly?”

“No, she isn’t. Currently, Her Majesty Sotis… has a translucent form.”

“Why is that so?”

“It’s also my first time seeing such a situation. It isn’t something commonly seen.”

The wizard continued with a cautious tone.

“Perhaps she’d hesitated just before she became a soul. Although she wanted to disappear and hoped to become a soul… In actual fact, it seems that she didn’t want to disappear.”

“……”

Marianne frowned. It was to suppress the tears that welled up as it pleased.

As she liked and cared for Sotis, it was hard for her to bear such a situation. The pain was akin to someone carving a hole in her chest.

She felt so much pain just because she cared about Sotis, so how would Sotis feel?

“A soul that has lost its path completely isn’t able to endure for long. It probably won’t last a few months before it disappears just like that. It is unable to return to God’s arms, and an eternal death will be upon it.”

“W—what should we do then, Lord wizard? As the Lord wizard has mentioned, Her Majesty is too pitiful, so please help me find a way.”

“I’m in the midst of finding a way to condense and guide an incomplete soul. A record exists, but I don’t know if I can restore it because it’s written in the dead ancient language now. But it’s worth a try. Though I’ll need some time.”

“Time…”

Marianne murmured in a sullen tone.

“……Is the new imperial consort really pregnant?”

“I suppose the doctor will ascertain that.”

“If she’s really pregnant…… We might have even lesser time than we’d thought.”

“I’ll make it happen somehow.”

As Marianne forced herself to hold back her tears, her eyes turned red. She tried to rub her eyes with the back of her hand, but she recalled that she was wearing light makeup for the banquet and lowered her arm.

“……Why do you like Her Majesty, Lord Lehman?”

“If you ask me about why…”

Although a long time has passed since he first met Sotis, his memory of that moment was so clear that it felt like something that happened yesterday.

As his spiritual eye has just presented, not only was his vision blurred, he had headaches and tears flowed down naturally. The shape of the brooch she gave him, as well as her face, were blurry.

However, the kindness that Sotis rendered unhesitatingly wasn’t blurred at all. No, rather, it was clear enough that it hurt.

He remembered the bright scene that he’d witnessed then. With a breeze, the hood that she wore was blown away. Her hair, which fluttered like a pale purple haze. In his blurry vision, Sotis’ movements as she combed her hair and wore her hood were just like a butterfly’s wings.

Although she disappeared without saying a word, the traces she left behind had never disappeared from Lehman’s heart.

As such.

“……I can’t answer.”

Lehman placed a hand on his chest, closed his eyes and smiled.

“It just happened.”

If he had to say a reason, it wasn’t love, but logic.

That’s what Lehman Periwinkle thought.

He fell for Sotis, and he didn’t even know why. He just couldn’t help but fall for her.

* * *