If Only I Could Disappear - Chapter 38

Sotis Marigold looked at the wizard.

A beautiful amber light, similar to the colour of his eyes, wrapped around his entire body gently before spreading out in all directions. The enormous yet warm and gentle light wrapped around the spirits.

Soon, the black smoke-like spirits began shrinking, becoming smaller and smaller until they transformed into fluttering butterflies that started circling around Lehman.

The number of butterflies increased. One, two, ten, twenty……

“They would have turned into malevolent spirits if they’d stayed a little longer.”

Lehman carefully caressed those butterflies before gently guiding them into a small pouch.

Before entering the pouch, the butterflies chattered at Lehman, conveying their names and the messages they wanted to pass on to their remaining loved ones.

Lehman smiled and looked at Sotis.

“Thanks to Lady Sotis, I won’t be needing the eradication magic.”

Sotis was laying the gravekeeper, who’d collapsed, flat on the ground and looked up at Lehman.

“……Thanks to me?”

“That’s right.”

Though they could be called malevolent spirits, it was fortunate that their momentum had weakened before they deteriorated completely. In other words, the situation became much simpler. As long as they handled their bodies correctly and performed the funeral rites slightly later, they could guide the spirits, making it unnecessary to eradicate them.

The eradication magic would also affect the caster’s soul. It also wasn’t something he particularly enjoyed doing, on a psychological level. Not having to use the last resort was relieving for Lehman.

Sotis didn’t fully comprehend what she had accomplished, but it turned out to be quite an impressive feat.

“Now, we just need to bury the bodies and hold their funerals.”

“This time, I’ll have to sell this.”

Sotis chuckled slightly as she took out a black pearl brooch from her pouch. Black pearls were only found on the eastern coast, and it was last year’s birthday gift from her father.

More than half of the deceased had lost their lives due to the Duke of Marigold’s greed. She didn’t find it a waste to sell these items for their sake, not in the slightest. No, it was only natural and right to do so.

Was it just the brooch? Be it the time she became the crown princess or the time she became the empress. Sotis wanted to sell all the gifts for formalities that she’d received from nobles, and use the proceeds to buy food and clothing for the poor. The people on the market’s streets were happy because their businesses prospered, while the impoverished could smile out of relief as they were able to purchase what they needed. Creating small miracles from the items that weren’t used frequently lightened Sotis’s heart, and it was a truly wonderful thing in many ways.

“Would all the butterflies fit inside that?”

When Sotis gestured at the seemingly magical pouch, Lehman nodded.

“Yes. So, now we should move on to the next task. I need your help, Lady Sotis.”

“What is it?”

Sotis clenched her fist at his serious tone and asked.

“It’s none other than… “

“……”

“…Please help me locate a shovel, Lady Sotis.”

Lehman spoke with a mischievous smile.

“It’s because I need to dig the ground.”

* * *

Lehman Periwinkle dug the ground.

Sadly, it was a task that neither magic nor miracle could help with. He wielded the shovel and continued digging the earth. If it weren’t for the rain that fell just then, which dampened the soil, his pouring sweat might not have been enough.

Sotis stood under the eaves of the old mountain hut, avoiding the rain. But whenever Lehman tried to move the bodies, she quickly approached, trying to offer some help.

“Uh…”

Lehman smiled awkwardly and, as Sotis approached, he shrunk his body slightly and took a step back.

“My appearance is a mess, Lady Sotis. I’ll finish everything up if you take a rest.”

“It’s alright.”

It was embarrassing to be seen in such a dishevelled state, as he was covered in dirt, sweat, and rain. People would always want to present their best appearance before someone that they held in their heart.

However, she smiled nonchalantly and raised her sleeve to wipe off the sweat and dirt from his forehead. In order to reach up to him, who was much taller than her, she tiptoed and wiped his forehead, cheeks, and the back of his neck with the corner of her clothes meticulously.

“You’ve worked hard.”

“It was a task that’s completely unexpected.”

Lehman smiled cheerfully and lowered his head.

Sotis gazed at him intently. She thought the way this man, who was an entire head taller than her, bent down meekly for her was unexpectedly endearing.

“Who would have known? That my work in Mendez would involve spending the night digging up the dirt of a mountain with a shovel?”

“I feel sorry to have to leave it to the Great Wizard.”

“Great Wizard…”

“You aren’t one yet?”

Sotis’s water-coloured pupils curved slightly.

He’s capable of communicating with spirits, guiding and sometimes even suppressing them. He was even capable of magic to eradicate spirits to a certain extent.

Depending on how it was utilised, it could become an incredibly powerful magic. Although there were many prominent wizards in Beatum, there was no way that such a master of the magic tower wasn’t a Great Wizard.

Perhaps it wasn’t made known to the world. He was already a Great Wizard. Sotis wasn’t well-versed in Beatum’s affairs, but she didn’t think there were that many wizards that were as impressive as he was in Beatum.

“Please don’t worry. I won’t thoughtlessly spread rumours around.”

Was it because of her mood? Even though he was concealing his power, he didn’t seem threatening at all. Even when she was so close to him, she didn’t feel any sort of fear. On the contrary, her uneasily thumping heart also calmed down, and she felt at ease.

His real strength wasn’t in his hidden magic or his handsome appearance. It was the warm-heartedness he displayed when he worried if she was being rained on, all the while tirelessly digging the ground with a shovel all night, his sweat dripping down his back.

“Your face is rather haggard, Lehman. Once we’re done here, let’s head to the capital and take a few days to rest and eat well.”

As Sotis touched the corners of Lehman’s eyes with her small hand gently, causing him to make a low groan.

“Please don’t be so good to me, Lady Sotis.”

“Why?”

“Well…”

She wiped the dirt on her hand on the corner of her skirt and looked up at him. When faced with that clear and kind gaze, the ends of Lehman’s eyebrows lowered as he smiled.

Of course, it’s because I love you. Even if it was just an insignificant act of kindness to you, everything is meaningful to me, who likes you.

He wanted to say that but stopped himself. Even if it was his true feelings, he wanted to keep everything hidden if it would become a burden to Sotis.

Amidst the silence, Lehman smiled faintly. He put down the shovel and held his hands together above Sotis’s head. It was a gesture born from his desire to keep even a single drop of rain from falling on her.

But how was he to shield her from the rain with just his two hands? In the end, they both were soaked, and they burst into laughter without anyone saying anything.

“How could I not be good to you?”

Sotis murmured after covering the dirt neatly.

“The Great Wizard treats me so kindly that I’m incapable of being cruel to you.”

Despite Lehman’s protests, Sotis ended up helping him with his work. As he placed the deceased in the pit one by one, she covered them with a shroud and sprinkled soil over them.

Her pristine white dress had become such a mess that its original colour was lost. Her arms and legs were covered in dirt, and her cheeks were flushed from the exertion. Her body felt as heavy as soaked cotton, and she was so exhausted that even her breath tasted bitter.

Yet, she was happy. Spending time with this person was enjoyable.

Just looking at his face would cause a smile to emerge effortlessly.

Sotis quickly wiped the dirt off her palm on her hem and reached out.

“Please give me the shovel. I’ll leave it by the hut. Let’s go down together.”

Lehman shook his head and instead of the shovel, he extended his hand to clasp her hand firmly.

“This is enough. I’ll take care of the rest.”

Sotis glanced down at their clasped hands and smiled slightly. There was no trace of any sadness in her serene smile.

“I won’t disappear anymore, even if you don’t confirm it like this. You know that, don’t you?”

Instead of answering, Lehman smiled back at her.

Spirit magic was much harder to learn than other types of magic. Just handling spirits alone made him feel the pain of being torn into pieces, and if he wasn’t able to recite the most basic of spells, he had to rewrite the same magic circle a thousand times.

During that arduous process, he had questioned his own destiny during moments of frustration.

Would living as a spirit wizard truly bring him happiness? Although being the master of the magic tower meant that he could save countless spirits, was it really his life’s calling?

With the passage of time, Lehman Periwinkle gradually found vague answers to his questions. He realised that he loved magic more than he had initially thought and found happiness in helping others.

However, his answer wasn’t perfect. He still knew that there was a small but significant void within him. The emptiness didn’t grow, but it didn’t diminish either. It remained a distinct presence that criticised him quietly.

What will this destiny bring me? Among all the types of magic, why did I end up dealing with spirits, of all things?

“Lady Sotis.”

And then, Sotis Marigold came into his life.

With hair like the dawn, eyes like clear skies, and a heart as warm as the sun.

When he saw her, Lehman knew. He couldn’t help but know.

“Forgive me for being presumptuous, but… do you believe in destiny?”

Saving this woman would change his life significantly, very significantly.

Perhaps even the reason for Lehman Periwinkle to become the master of the Periwinkle magic tower.

“I believe in it,”

His amber-coloured eyes were filled with passion, affection, and unwavering conviction.

They were a brilliant display of his unwavering emotions.