If You Dare To Marry Me, Then I Do Too - Chapter 9

The heavy snow came and went quickly. The faint white sun was shining all over the sky. The snow had begun to melt, and the ground was wet.

I took a taxi to the gate of the marriage registry, and strode forward with great vigor and pride, and a solemn and stirring spirit of the words “Shrill winds rise, waters cold; the hero shall go and never come home.[1]”

At this time, dead mouse hesitated and frowned.

“What’s wrong? You’re not regretting it now, are you? There’s still time to go back,” I looked back with a mocking smile on my lips.

“Luo Luo, are we really going to get married? You’re not kidding, right? Why am I having cold sweat?” The expression on his face was complicated; , full of doubt, nervousness and confusion.

“Nonsense. It’s already written in such big letters, don’t you know how to read chinese characters? No matter how bold I i am, I won’t dare to make fun of China’s marriage law, you know? If you’re having in a cold sweat, it’s because you’re weak! Who asked you to be born malnourished? No wonder your sweat is you’re sweating cold!” I drew a big circle with my hand and stared at him fiercely.

“That’s not what I meant. We’ve only known each other for a week. I’m just a poor teacher with a pitiful monthly salary. I can never make you rich so why are you willing to marry me? With your qualifications, you can meet a man much better than me. Won’t you regret that later? I’m afraid you’ll regret marrying me!” He still didn’t dare to believe it.

“Ever since you gave me your password, I have invested my trust in on you, 100%, and I respect this feeling. If my understanding of people is wrong, then maybe it is just God’s way of punishing me. As for what you have, I don’t care. Fame and status are nothing in my eyes. All I want is a humble man, one that I can could trust. I want him to be simple and indifferent to life so that I could just freely live a leisurely life. That’s enough.”

I looked up and smiled at the sky.

“However, we’ve only known each other for such a short time. You might not be able to accept my shortcomings. You won’t scold me for tricking you to marry me?” He sounded a bit worried.

“Oh, I’m obviously the one who tricked you into this. I’m the main culprit, you’re just an accomplice. Don’t go complaining about me to the Amitabha Buddha. If you fear that I’ll regret my decision to marry you marrying me then you just have to be nicer to me, give way to me, then love me, don’t beat me, don’t scold me, don’t rob my food. I’m easy to please! Hehehe!” I teased and laughed.

“Luo Luo, I’m telling you, I really have a lot of shortcomings. I’m afraid that you won’t live with me anymore if you realize all my faults. I don’t want to have a marriage with only the beginning but with no end!”

I don’t know if he’s just playing a trick on me or if he really just has a lot of shady flaws.

“Blah blah blah, this crow’s mouth[2], we’re here to get a marriage license! Don’t curse yourself like that, okay?! This Luo Luo here has promised to God that no matter how many faults you have and how nasty they are, I will accept all of them and I will never regret this. Do you feel rest assured now?” I patted my chest and promised.

“Really? You won’t regret this? You really won’t regret this? Are you really sure you won’t regret this?” The dead mouse asked several more questions in quick succession.

“Oh shut up, you big man. You talk endlessly like a mother-in-law. We’re just getting married, you’re talking like I’m going to kill you. Besides, I’m beautiful, smart, talented and proud. There is no one else like me that you can find in heaven nor on earth. Will you be so wronged if you marry me? Are you so afraid to marry me? Then let’s just go back and I won’t bother you again.” I stomped my foot in anger, turned around and pretended to leave. left.

“Tying the knot, who’s afraid? Hmph, the one who will regret this won’t be me!” The dead mouse rushed over, took my hand and walked towards the front door with his head held high.

Hmmm, this kid’s limbs are malnourished but his brains are full and heavy. Your days of bleeding regrets are just around the corner, you’ll see. I smiled proudly.

I turned my head and looked around, pretending to look at the scenery, pursing my lips tightly to hide my happiness.

Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, I’m really going to get married. I can’t believe that I’m finally going to get married. It’s amazing. I’ve been single for more than 20 years, and now, a man is finally willing to pull me to stamp a certificate. Is this just a dream?

It’s been just a week ago when the old witch was cursing me, saying that I couldn’t get married and then now I’m here to get my marriage license. Hmph, life really has its ups and downs

Come all, you old bachelors, envy me! Let’s see now who’s the one who can’t get married!

I wiggled my head in triumph and let the dead mouse hold my little hand to lead me into the Civil Affairs Bureau building.

The office in charge of marriage registration was filled with a room full of people, and some seemingly idle staff. There was a young woman and man sitting on a table to register. A middle-aged woman handed them two red books stamped with steel seals. She smiled at the couple and gave them her blessings.

The couple looked very excited as they thanked her, as if it was the middle-aged woman that gave them their happiness. Their hands were trembling as they held their marriage license, as if afraid that it would be snatched away. They bowed their heads and went away.

We both sat down and handed over our ID cards. When the other person asked for our household registration book, we were dumbfounded on the spot.

“Sorry, we didn’t know that we needed to bring our household registration book. This is my first time getting married, we didn’t know the rules. We’ll go back and get it, and come back later!” The dead mouse laughed.

Everyone in the room was amused and bursted into laughter.

I was about to rush out of the room to laugh when I was suddenly stopped by male staff. He looked at me with a smile that didn’t really seem like a smile and said, “Little sister, we have expressly stipulated here that an underage man and woman are not allowed to register…”

“What? How dare you call me a minor? Let me just tell you that I’m already 23 years old. If we were in the old society, my son would already have been married to a wife…” I rushed at to him, with my eyebrows up, my eyes big to show my serious protest.

Did he have to make that mistake? Well, I am kind of petite. Unfortunately, I also have a baby face with a big pair of eyes. I do get mistaken often as a little girl.

I remember one time, when our teacher took us to Guangzhou for our graduate studies, I took a day off to visit my uncle that was working in Guangzhou. I returned to the highschool where my cousin went to. My aunt asked me then to bring something to my cousin on the way. I had just taken a step inside the campus when a patrol teacher caught me and said that I was a truant student. The old man grabbed my arm and did not let go no matter how I explained but no avail. I was so angry that my nose and mouth almost spurted blood.

Later, my cousin’s head teacher passed by and saw me being pulled and interrogated. I said that I was Zhang Xiao Jun’s cousin and that I came here to give him something, then I raised the bag in my hand. With that proof, only then did that stupid patrol teacher let me go.

After that, I became confused. How should I say that I’m a graduating student in a university when I’m even more childish than a middle school student? Why am I so childish? I feel like I’m being suffocated just thinking about it.

Also, every time I go shopping, I’d always hear those sales girls calling me a little girl. Makes me want to jump at them and bite them.

Uggh, it’s not even my fault that I look like this, can you blame me? You can only blame my parents for making me look like this, what does it have to do with me? I do wish that I could become a little mature, also a bit more feminine, but I can’t do it! It pisses me off!

I didn’t even finish the words I was going to say when another wave of laughter inside the room was heard. The wave could be compared to the tidal wave of Qiantang river[3].

The dead mouse grabbed me by the arm and dragged me out of the office like a dead pig.

***

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