I’m an Infinite Regressor, But I’ve Got Stories to Tell - Chapter 54

Ruler I

Today, let’s talk about Dang Seo-rin, the guild leader of the Samcheon World Guild.

But before that, let’s digress a bit… Being a regressor, there are aspects that I notice more keenly, changes that I feel more distinctly than others.

Like the increasing wrinkles on Noh Do-hwa’s forehead as the years go by—just kidding.

For example, the ‘change of language.’

Those who have read my stories so far must already be familiar with these linguistic changes.

A prime example is ‘monster.’ Initially, these strange lifeforms were called by their English name. Sometimes, they weren’t even considered lifeforms, which is why they began to be referred to as ‘grotesques’ or ‘aberrations.’

Everyone knows that ‘gate’ changed to ‘void.’

Until now, I’ve kept this hidden to avoid confusion, but the term ‘awakener’ has also undergone various transformations.

Many people called them ‘hunters,’ then ‘transcendents,’ and later on, ‘ascendants’ became quite common.

The latter terms increasingly reflected a bizarre ideology known as ‘Awakener Supremacy.’ Those who wanted to distance themselves from this pseudo-eugenics preferred the more neutral term ‘Awakener.’

Why?

“Awakener Undertaker…”

Noh Do-hwa would call me.

That’s not so much an honorific like ‘doc’ but more a way of saying ‘I don’t regard you as a transcendent or ascendant.’

This wasn’t my idea; I heard this secret directly from her in one cycle. It’s so typically Noh Do-hwa, isn’t it?

Anyway.

Amidst the flux of linguistic changes, there were words that remained grand and steadfast over time.

One such word was ‘guild.’

No one knows who first started calling the group of awakeners a ‘guild.’

It was as if, in the collective unconscious of Koreans, there was a declaration: ‘From now on, we agree to call it a guild.’ The name naturally stuck.

Most awakeners joined a guild as if it were the most natural thing. Even that crazy Sword Marquess created a one-person guild called Yuldoguk, didn’t he? (In the 108th cycle, the guild briefly increased to two members.)

Here, some might wonder.

What does a guild actually do?

Is it like an adventurers’ guild in an RPG where you can take on quests? Can you evolve through tiers from B-class, A-class, S-class, or bronze-silver-platinum based on how brilliantly you perform quests?

Unfortunately, no such thing happened. That’s just the insane habit of East Asians who, having learned bureaucracy from ancient times, apply ranks and grades even to private sectors.

I can answer what a guild is very simply.

It’s just a gang.

“Guild leader.”

“Yes?”

For example, in the 6th cycle, when I was serving as Dang Seo-rin’s right hand in the Samcheon Guild, something like this happened.

“The awakeners from the Blue Sea Guild went around all the bars in Nam-gu last night.”

“What?”

The lounging Dang Seo-rin sat up.

“Those bastards should stick to eating seaweed on their island. What are they doing on the mainland? Do we have proof?”

“I’ve gathered all the evidence. I even had Manager Yu turn on the minimap. You can give the order to execute the plan anytime.”

“That’s why I like having a vice guild leader.”

“Will you go yourself?”

“Of course. Let’s crush them.”

I once mentioned that I might have told too many positive stories about Dang Seo-rin. Do you remember?

If anyone from Dang Seo-rin’s fan club is reading this, I apologize. In fact, such conversations were quite common in the Samcheon World Guild’s office (a train car).

The ‘Great Witch Idol Dang Seo-rin,’ the biggest star awakener in the history of the Korean Peninsula, known today, is merely a product of extensive historical distortion years later.

I know this well because I spent decades working as something like her manager.

-Ding, ding, ding, ding!

As the bell rang, the guild members disembarked from the train in droves.

Over two hundred guild members, all wearing pointy hats. Not just that, each one also held a broom.

In a world gone mad, our guild was an exceptionally good example of insanity.

Dang Seo-rin climbed onto the roof of the station, like a principal on a podium, and looked very pleased at the sight of everyone in pointy hats.

“Hello, everyone.”

“Yes, Great Witch!”

“The Blue Sea Guild brats were hanging around Yeongdo last night, having a feast at the bars we protect. They have a lot of money. They had 16 rounds of drinks! Life must be good in Yeongdo. But they didn’t say a word to us, their neighbors. How should we feel about this slight?”

“Kill them all!”

Someone shouted. It was Yu Ji-won, my lieutenant and the top agitator in Korea.

Dang Seo-rin blinked, as if encountering a surprising perspective.

“Hmm… I hadn’t considered that angle, but hearing you guys, I suddenly feel enlightened. Yes, that’s a great idea. Let’s kill them.”

“Ooooo!”

Dressed in black pointy hats and black cloaks, the members of the Samcheon World Guild marched through the city.

Grown adults embarrassed? Well, there were some non-adults, but setting them aside, of course, it was embarrassing, but you’d be killed for saying such a thing in front of Dang Seo-rin.

The opposing guild, caught off guard by a sudden full-scale attack, panicked.

“Shit! It’s the Witch’s cult!”

“It’s Samcheon.”

“The Witch’s cult is attacking! The crazy witch is here!”

“It’s Samcheon World, dammit! Do you want to die?”

No one listened to Dang Seo-rin. Hardly anyone remembered the name Samcheon. It was just the Busan Witch’s cult.

And the Witch’s cult’s specialty was witch hunts. In these times, civilization had progressed enough that, unlike the primitive Middle Ages, it was the witches who did the hunting, not the other way around.

“Please, spare me…”

Within three hours of the battle’s onset, the Blue Sea Guild, based in Yeongdo, Busan, was annihilated.

Thump, thump. Dang Seo-rin, looking somber, tapped the opponent’s head with the end of her broom.

“Hey.”

The broom’s stiff bristles poked the Blue Sea Guild leader’s eyes.

“Argh… Ah…”

“Why would someone who can’t last a day without groveling rob the wallets of honest citizens? We don’t want to fight you. But when the merchants ask us for help, huh? We can’t just ignore the people’s pleas. Why make things difficult for us?”

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry… Please, just let me live…”

“Let’s play our witch game. We’ll dunk you in water, and if you sink, you’re innocent; if you float, you’re guilty. Got it?”

“You son of a bitch! You insane lunatic! How can you call yourself human?”

“Guys, what are you doing? This man’s going for a swim.”

I repeated,

“He’s going for a swim.”

Again, unlike the primitive inquisitors who tied rocks or iron weights to ankles, we used the modern invention of ‘concrete hiking boots.’

There were underwater mountains; the sea had many mountains too. Concrete boots helped humanity conquer underwater peaks.

Soon, bubbles rose from the sea off Busan.

I nodded.

“He’s not floating, guild leader.”

“Innocent, then.”

Dang Seo-rin pressed her pointy hat to her chest.

She lowered her head, looking sad.

“This too is a tragedy of these troubled times. Let’s all pay our respects.”

“A moment of silence.”

Following Dang Seo-rin, all two hundred guild members observed a moment of silence.

Our guild didn’t just handle water magic. We also mastered fire magic that brought out the scent of burning wood, time magic that made you acutely aware of each second of a fleeting day, healing magic that gifted the effects of a foot massage by walking on heated stone paths, and many others…

As a guild led by Dang Seo-rin, who was versed in all types of magic, Samcheon World never discriminated between white and black magic, and loved all four elements equally.

In a world gone mad, Samcheon World was even madder, especially Dang Seo-rin.

Now.

Even with this brief anecdote, I believe you can understand why I called a guild a ‘gang.’

I chose a slightly provocative story, but the main source of income for guilds was protection fees. They diligently collected taxes from people doing business, working, and taking refuge in the cities.

There was no choice. The fantasy of gold coins dropping when monsters were defeated did not exist in reality.

There was no miraculous superconducting energy source ‘mana stone’ to replace oil.

The only somewhat useful items monsters dropped were their meat, but a guild running a butcher shop had its limits. People didn’t prefer monster meat, and it sometimes contained radioactive ‘seasonings.’

In the end, guilds had no choice but to extort ‘protection fees’ from people. Up to this point, all guilds across the country, no, the world, were the same.

The real difference came after that. It depended on how one interpreted the concept of ‘protection.’

“The essence of the world is a struggle of all against all, and humans are the most fearsome beasts. Protection of humans, by humans, and for humans is the most necessary measure for current humanity.”

Humanists who adopted this answer settled into their territories. It was the ruling philosophy chosen by the majority of tough guys.

“Isn’t the monster scarier than humans?”

About 4% of the population, the extreme minority of cowards, thought differently.

“Sure, humans are dangerous, but monsters are even more dangerous.”

“Why bother? Monsters don’t even drop anything useful.”

“Why not? Busan drops, doesn’t it?”

Dang Seo-rin set the first day of each month as the protection tax due date. At the end of each month, she led the guild members on a void-clearing expedition outside Busan, then returned.

It wasn’t just about hunting. Dang Seo-rin always filmed the scenes of the monsters being killed and dragged at least one live monster back to Busan.

She demonstrated in front of Busan citizens that the Great Witch’s magic did not apply only to humanity.

-Gweeeeh!

The monster, after tasting fire magic, water magic, time magic, and healing magic in order, screamed in gratitude with its limbs bound tightly.

“More torture! More! More!”

“Indeed, the Samcheon World guild leader knows how to entertain.”

This magic show became so popular that it became a proud symbol and attraction of Busan.

Surprisingly, when they collected protection taxes the next day or the day after the execution show, the payment rate significantly increased. The citizens’ response was along the lines of ‘Since they gave us such an entertaining show, we should pay the admission fee.’ Even in the days when the Korean National Tax Service was running smoothly, the ratio of sincere taxpayers wasn’t this high.

“Guild leader… Are you a genius?”

“Yes. You can keep complimenting me.”

“If not for the pointy hat, you’d be in the biographies of great figures.”

“Do you want to die?”

As predicted by Dang Seo-rin, Busan naturally fell into the hands of the Samcheon Guild.

As the situation turned interesting, even some humanists had to reconsider their political philosophies.

“Now that I think about it, monsters are scarier than humans.”

“Right. You can at least talk to people; you can’t negotiate with monsters.”

“How did we miss this obvious truth until now! I feel pathetic!”

As the nation of early adopters, Korean guild leaders did not hesitate to emulate Dang Seo-rin.

Whether out of love for their hometown or a thirst for power, guild leaders switched their primary occupation to hunters. Guild leaders who failed to transition were naturally weeded out, so they weren’t even worth mentioning.

However, none of them could keep up with Dang Seo-rin’s ‘magic show.’

Who could dare to perform a spell that cuts off a monster’s limbs (actually more than just four limbs) and reattaches them while floating in mid-air?

“Why are the executions in our neighborhood so dull?”

“Over there in Busan, they’ve got fire magic and water magic and all sorts of things.”

“Hah, nothing beats the original.”

In a world where the internet and cinemas had perished, monster executions were irresistible entertainment. More and more civilians began to move to Busan.

The fact that Dang Seo-rin had set protection taxes at a very reasonable level also contributed to the migration boom.

And it was around this time that our Great Witch, Dang Seo-rin, started having strange thoughts—though she was always a bit strange, these were ‘even stranger thoughts.’

Footnotes:

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