I’m fine with being the second girlfriend - CH 4
The hallway near the club room is known as the best place for confessions. That day I was lying on the couch. The window was open, so I could hear the voices of all the students around.
-I’m sorry for calling you out of the blue. Did I disturb you?
The boy was a third-year basketball member. He was a very flamboyant person and attracted everyone’s attention.
-I don’t want to be rude, but…
Hayasaka-san’s voice sounds a bit scared. It’s the fourth time a boy confessed his love to Hayasaka-san in that hallway. Or so I understand.
-Don’t be nervous. I mean, I’m the one who is. You know what I’m trying to do?
-Maybe.
-Does this happen to you often?
-Yes, occasionally.
-I can see that.
From the atmosphere in the air, he knew his confession would not succeed. But since he had come this far, he had no choice but to make it.
-I’ve been in love with you for a long time. I’d like to ask you to go out with me.
-I’m sorry. But I can’t.
-So, do you already have a boyfriend?
After a pause, Hayasaka-san answered in a weak voice.
-…Not yet.
Good answer, you shouldn’t say that you have a boyfriend. If you do, and Yanagi-senpai finds out, you’ll be in trouble.
-So, there’s someone else you like… -I’m sorry.
Then footsteps of someone running away from the place can be.
-Is it over already?
Maki, who was lying on the sofa on the other side of the room, asked about the situation outside.
-You shouldn’t get up yet.
Apart from Hayasaka-san, who has run away, there is one other person left. Heartbroken students hang out in the hallway for a while.
Once I hurried to sit up and our gazes met, which was awkward.
-It’s not easy to be a pretty girl.
Maki says.
-Hayasaka-san is having a hard time lately.
-Have you heard anything about it, Maki?
-Well…
This man is the president of the student council, but he’s dating a teacher. Miki-chan, the English teacher.
She’s a second-year college graduate and has a kind character. She doesn’t talk to Maki much, but judging by the fact that Maki doesn’t show any interest in the other girls, they must get along well.
And Miki-chan is a very approachable teacher and many girls often approach her for advice.
-Someone seems to have stolen her gym clothes, and she’s also been sent a lot of creepy love letters.
-Creepy love letters?
-They have no name and the sender is unknown. And then they write the next day to ask for a response.
That is a little scary.
-Even a guy in the same high school uniform was following her home.
-So that’s happening with Hayasaka-san… I hope she’s okay.
-Well, it didn’t seem to bother her that much.
Maki said, and continued talking.
-When something like that happens to pretty girls, they feel like «here we go again». I think she’s been experiencing it since she was very young, like it’s a routine occurrence.
-I see.
-Hayasaka is shy and reserved, right? So I guess she’s had a lot of trouble in the past about it. She keeps getting courted by strange men and revered by girls.
-Sounds likely.
I say to myself as I get up from the couch. Surely there’s no one left in the hallway. But when I looked out the window, our eyes met.
To my surprise, it was Hayasaka-san who had stayed behind.
When she notices me, she speaks to me in signals.
«Can I come in now?»
I guess she thought I was alone. Thereupon, she made a heart symbol on her chest with her hand mischievously. This was a terrible mistake.
-What’s this all about?
Maki, who had gotten up from the sofa, looked at me and Hayasaka alternately and said.
-You guys aren’t just friends, are you? I mean, she’s not the Hayasaka I know. Her expression with you is very different from the one I see on a daily basis.
She gently covered her face with her hands. I could almost hear her say, «Forget everything you just saw.»
-I’m sorry.
Hayasaka-san hid her face with her hands. She had come into the club to chat with me. I had tried to resolve the misunderstanding, but it was somewhat futile.
-It must have been embarrassing for Kirishima-kun to be seen by Maki-kun.
-Just a little
«I’ll talk to you later», Maki said smiling as he left the room.
-I was trying to make Kirishima-kun feel embarrassed. I’m sorry.
-It’s okay, I don’t mind.
-Really?
The space between her fingers slowly opens up and she looks at me between them.
-You’re not upset?
-No, it’s all good.
When I said that, Hayasaka-san finally lowered her hands.
-Maki-kun will ask you if we’re dating.
I don’t think so. He’s a surprisingly reserved guy when it comes to these things, and Hayasaka-san seems to have calmed down. She looks around the room curiously.
-So, this is the research club room. It’s very cozy.
-It used to be a drawing room.
-How are things going with Tachibana-san?
-Very complicated.
-I’m sorry, I should have known. You follow her boyfriend on social media, don’t you, Kirishima-kun?
-It’s my daily routine.
-It’s definitely not good for your mental health.
-I’ve become so tolerant that I don’t care. I don’t feel like I have to look at social media once a day and grind my teeth anymore. I want to feel the frustration tomorrow and the day after.
-You look like you’re serious.
Hayasaka-san laughs after those words.
– And you know what they’re doing?
-Yes, Tachibana-san is studying with her boyfriend.
For the past few days, Tachibana-san has been studying for her exams in the library with her boyfriend.
Pictures were frequently posted on her boyfriend’s social network. She would appear writing in her notebook or reading a book. And we haven’t been able to see each other since, mostly because the clubs are closed during exam weeks.
-I thought Kirishima-kun would be the one to help her study. Because Kirishima-kun’s grades are better than mine.
-I thought so too, but you can’t compare me to her studying with her boyfriend.
And I don’t know why I say he’s her boyfriend anymore. The way it is, he’s her fiancé. The fact that she’s going to get married once she graduates makes her completely unattainable.
-Kirishima-kun, you’re completely out there.
-Sorry, I know I should be happy because I’m with you.
-No, I know you’re probably depressed, so I was trying to cheer you up. I want you to know that you can always count on me… Or am I not good enough?
-No, you’re wrong. I like you very much, Hayasaka-san.
As soon as I said that, she got up from the sofa she was on and sat down next to me. He raised her index finger and looked at me expectantly.
-Kirishima-kun, say it again.
-…I like you very much, Hayasaka-san.
The next moment, Hayasaka-san took me in her arms and pressed her body against mine tighter than ever.
She pulls her legs together as well as her upper body. I can’t help but notice how short her skirt is.
-Hayasaka-san, what are you doing?
-I’m trying to cheer you up, Kirishima-kun. Isn’t it hard for you to see Tachibana-san so close to her boyfriend?
-We’re at school.
-I like touching you, Kirishima-kun. When you came to visit me the day I was sick, and you crawled into bed with me, I was so happy to have you close to me and to be able to touch your whole body, just like you touched all of me.
-Remember when we made that rule about not doing anything extreme?
-I don’t think I have a bad body. A lot of guys look at me in a lewd way. The guy who confessed to me earlier also looked at my breasts a lot.
-Hayasaka-san, are you listening to me?
Despite my warnings, Hayasaka-san didn’t stop.
-So I think I can cheer Kirishima-kun up. I think I can make him happy with this body of mine.
-Hayasaka-san, you may not have noticed, but you’re saying some pretty troublesome things!
-I don’t like other guys looking at me like this, but if it’s Kirishima-kun, I don’t mind at all.
She grabbed my hand and tried to guide it between her white thighs that stretched out from her skirt.
-W-Wait…
-What? Why don’t you want to touch me, Kirishima-kun?
-No, no, no, no, you’re going too fast. What’s wrong with you all of a sudden?
When I said that, Hayasaka-san made a sad expression and asked: «Too fast?» After a moment, she nodded her head and said, «I see, that’s right.»
-I think we should start with this, I really like it too.
Then she closed her eyes, turned to me and lifted her chin. She’s clearly expecting a kiss. What’s going on with her?
Just because I told her I like her, she’s so rampant. There might be some reason… Anyway, I have to do it.
-Hayasaka-san, I think you’re still unaware of the situation.
I pointed to the window that was without curtains, this room is in view of the hallway. And at that moment, Maki was there waving at us.
Silently, Hayasaka-san covered her face with her hands again.
-I won’t do something like that in school again. I don’t want Tachibana-san to see me here. I don’t want to do anything that might cause trouble for Kirishima-kun.
Hayasaka-san seemed to have regained her composure this time. And this time Maki-san also left.
I helped Hayasaka-san sit on the sofa and made him a cup of coffee, although I wasn’t sure if he would drink it.
-What happened to you all of a sudden? You’re not like that.
When I said that, Hayasaka-san looked away awkwardly and said,
-Lately, I’ve been feeling that Kirishima-kun has been avoiding me.
-I don’t mean to.
-Despite the club activities being closed for exams, we haven’t seen each other even once all week.
-I’m sorry, I’ve been busy studying for exams….
-You’re right. We shouldn’t neglect our studies.
But her words didn’t stop there, Hayasaka-san blushed and continued speaking.
-I felt insecure, and when you told me that you liked me, I was so happy that I couldn’t control my feelings. I’m sorry for being so heavy.
She took a pencil from my pencil case on the coffee table and began to touch it.
-Can I ask you something that has been bothering me for a long time?
-Sure.
-Kirishima-kun, why do you bring so many pencils?
-I guess it’s a habit I’ve had since elementary school. It doesn’t mean anything in particular.
I bring twelve sharpened pencils every day to class.
-I really like it. Kirishima-kun’s pencils.
-Then, I’ll give you two.
-You will? Thank you.
Hayasaka-san held a pencil in both hands and smiled happily. It was such a beautiful scene that, if this was a commercial, it probably would have raised pencil sales by 20%.
After that, Hayasaka-san asked me many questions. How and where did I buy my glasses? Why do I always wear a tie, even in summer?
-Honestly, I don’t know much about boys, that’s why I’m so curious.
-Just ask. If it’s Hayasaka-san, I’m sure everyone will want to please her.
-But I don’t know how to talk to anyone except Kirishima-kun. I don’t know when to talk to them, and when I’m with them, I can only nod my head.
That’s true. Hayasaka-san attracts a lot of attention, but besides being cute, she’s clumsy.
-And I can’t feel free to talk to any guy either. Then everyone will start saying things like; Do you like him? Are you dating him?
-So, do you think you’ll be misunderstood and get into trouble?
Hayasaka-san smiled faintly as she said, «Probably.»
-Have you had any problems with that recently?
-Not really, it’s the same old confessions, but I’m used to it by now.
-I see, so, no missing gym clothes, no nameless love letters in your shoe locker, no boys following you home… Seems reasonable.
– Huh?
Hayasaka-san is surprised and freezes for a few moments.
-Kirishima-kun, did you know that?
-Yes, I’m sorry. It’s a piece of information I just heard.
-Don’t worry about it. Actually, I was, although it’s been a long time since I received love letters and I try to go home with some friends. So everything is fine.
-How often did that happen?
-Since a while ago. And when I was in high school, it used to happen a lot. Do you think if I say I have a boyfriend it will stop? Then he’d be less likely to harass me.
But suddenly, after those words, she started to shake her head.
-It’s not like I want to reveal my relationship with Kirishima-kun or anything. If I do that, it’ll be hard for Kirishima-kun to get close to Tachibana-san.
-And you shouldn’t be saying that you have a boyfriend either. Even if your favorite person is from another school, you never know who he’s related to.
-Yes, you’re right. Well, I’d better get back to class.
She got up from the sofa while saying those words, but suddenly called back to me.
-Hey, Kirishima-kun
-What’s wrong?
-I… I’m your girlfriend, right?
-Yes, you don’t have to ask again.
Hayasaka-san smiled with a «hehehe» in a satisfied manner and left the club room. Once alone, I scratched my head. So she’s worried that I’m avoiding her.
I think it might be time for us to spend more time together, especially now that the club is not active because of exams.
To be honest, I lied that I was busy studying for exams.
I put my hand in my pocket and pulled out some letters. Hayasaka-san said that she hasn’t received love letters for a while.
For the past few days, I’ve been collecting them to keep them out of Hayasaka-san’s sight.
Even Maki-san said she didn’t seem to be distressed by what was happening, but that’s only because I’m very careful and patient. I try to protect her from anything that might happen to her, even though I’m very afraid of getting into trouble.
Hayasaka-san is the kind of girl who is weak, and she tends to put too much pressure on herself. Therefore, I plan to get rid of the person who is harassing her.
-What? Did you really know?
Maki exclaimed. We were standing in the corner of the field during PE class.
-Yes. I still didn’t know about the gym clothes.
The girls were playing tennis. Hayasaka-san had an old-fashioned gym uniform that she borrowed from the infirmary.
Many times I’ve seen Hayasaka-san in front of her shoe locker with a letter in her hand, and a troubled face.
-By the way, I’m also the one who chased her home.
-You, Kirishima? What do you mean?
-I’ve been watching her from a distance to make sure she’s not being stalked.
-You don’t seem to have noticed that you’re the stalker.
-Really?
One time, I saw her about to walk into her house, but she suddenly turned around and I panicked. She didn’t see my face, but it made her think I was suspicious.
-So, the problem that remains to be solved now is, who has her gym clothes?
-Yes. And the culprit could be one of those who participate in the active clubs.
The only time you can put a letter in the shoe locker is after school.
-It’s exam week, but many students are still here to do volunteer work. We’re still here too. It’s not going to be easy to find the culprit, is it?
-Actually, it will be easy.
I’m confident it’s something we can find out soon. It’s just a matter of time.
-Really? I thought it was going to be hard to find the culprit. I thought it was going to be difficult to find the culprit.
-Mysteries are deliberately complicated to surprise the reader.
What happens in reality is much simpler.
-That’s a big statement. So do you have an idea who did it?
-That’s what the mystery is all about. The culprit could be a teacher, a girl, or me, but that’s because it’s written to surprise. And this time, the culprit would be a boy.
-Kirishima, I think you’ve been reading a lot of mystery books.
-And what else did you think was done in a mystery club?
-I thought the mystery was me, for being a weird guy who pushed into the abyss of jealousy. The guy who keeps checking the social networks of the boyfriend of that special someone he’s in love with day and night, while listening to the sound of the piano emerging from the room next door.
-Well, you’re not so wrong.
I have three possible suspects. The first one is Yamanaka-kun, from the manga club.
He’s the one who watches Hayasaka-san most closely during physical education class. His interest in gym clothes is unmistakable.
My second suspect is Ichiba-kun. Rumor has it that he got a zero on his midterm, although he is supposed to be smart. Plus he’s a member of the soccer club. He talks loudly about playing with girls from other schools, but always looks sideways to see how Hayasaka-san reacts.
My third suspect is Nohara-senpai, from the Badminton club. For a girl, her feelings and tastes are not so far from those of a boy. She is a third-year student and has confessed her feelings to Hayasaka-san twice, and was rejected both times.
She still hasn’t accepted being rejected by Hayasaka-san. Several times she comes to our class posing as a second year student, and keeps giving her longing looks. She’s the kind of girl who makes drama over everything.
The second time she confessed her feelings to him and was again rejected, she cried in front of everyone.
These three people desire Hayasaka-san, and what they have in common is that they do not accept rejection. This is a very difficult problem to solve when you are in love with someone.
-So, how do we identify the culprit from here?
-There is one more clue.
-The collected love letters?
We can determine who is responsible by their handwriting.
-Can you ask Miki to give you a copy of the tests?
-Sure.
-That’s a very frivolous answer. If they find out, you’re in big trouble.
-Miki-chan will do anything I tell her to.
No doubt, this man says the most unbelievable things.
-Anyway, Kirishima, please tell me about your relationship with Hayasaka. You are very protective of her.
-It’s not something I usually talk about with other people.
-It’s okay. But it’s not fair since Kirishima is the only one who knows my secret with Miki.
-I guess I don’t have a choice.
I proceeded to briefly explain my relationship with Hayasaka-san.
-Eeeeh… You guys are messed up.
Says Maki. Not the kind of thing you want to hear from someone dating a teacher.
-So you’re dating each other to fill the emptiness.
-You could say that.
-That’s what you’re thinking in your head, but I don’t think it works that well.
Maki was skeptical of the 25% chance of heartbreak method.
-There’s at least one serious oversight.
-What kind?
-The possibility of the lover becoming the main partner.
In other words, a radical change of mutual feeling for wanting to take things further between Hayasaka-san and me.
-If either of you deliberately makes the other person want to strive to take the first place, then it would result in one of you getting hurt.
What Maki-san says makes a lot of sense.
-I hope you won’t go to that extreme.
Classes were over, and I was facing a stack of papers in the club.
I was trying to match the love letters to the writing on the test, but most of the letters on the test paper are alphabetical.
Miki is an English teacher, so it’s no surprise. The name and translation are in Japanese, but there are too few letters to do a handwriting analysis. And we only have the second grade answer sheets, so third and first grade are out of our reach.
It was a completely careless mistake that I could have solved with a bit of thought…. I sigh and put the two love letters I’ve picked up from the shoe locker on my desk and look at them.
One compliments Hayasaka-san’s appearance and the other urges her to respond. It’s certainly creepy to ask for a response without a name.
In one of the love letters to Hayasaka-san, they asked her to show them her gym uniform. I looked at the letter in my hand, and then I realized something.
The letters are written very carefully. It’s natural for a letter addressed to a girl. That is, it’s different from usual handwriting.
I’ve heard that handwriting analysis is difficult, even for professionals, and there’s no way I could do it if I hadn’t been so observant in art class.
I wonder if there are any other clues. However, I’m not a nimble person, and once I’ve decided to solve the problem by handwriting analysis, it’s hard to use my head from there.
I could go to the three people I have narrowed down and tell them one by one that they are the culprits, in the hopes one of them will confess. Although, if I don’t have proof, it will be very difficult to get away with it.
Miki-chan had asked us to return the exams in the afternoon, and the clock is ticking. Well, I guess it’s inevitable.
I gave up and was determined to go home to sleep. That’s when I put the exam paper in the envelope to return it… But then, I had an idea.
I left the club room. I went downstairs to the first floor.
I headed to a room in the old school building on the opposite side of the club. I opened the door and walked in.
In the place there was a guy sitting at the desk. I go behind him and put my hand on his shoulder.
-Can I have Hayasaka-san’s gym uniform back, Please?
The boy turned his body towards me, and was silent for a moment thinking about what he would say.
-How did you know it was me?
-You didn’t put your name.
-I see, so that’s what it was.
The boy responds in a calm tone. I put the two letters on the desk and say.
-You can’t do that. You have to put your name on everything that’s important.
Hayasaka-san is playing tennis. But she is awkwardly hitting the ball towards her opponent.
She wipes the sweat from her forehead with her hand, her face is glistening. The gym uniform she’s wearing this time is her own.
The culprit was Yamanaka-kun, a member of the manga club. He is careless and forgets to write his name on exams and in his love letters.
But to be precise, that letter is not a love letter….
The day I visited the manga club, I saw a Tablet on Yamanaka’s desk. On it was a character that looked a lot like Hayasaka-san. She was wearing a gym uniform and had just started drawing the scene.
– You mean you were always watching her?
When I asked, Yamanaka-kun nodded.
-I couldn’t draw her well, and I wanted her to be my model.
-And that’s why you wrote her a letter and put it in her locker. But when she didn’t respond, you borrowed her gym clothes.
-Yes, it was very selfish of me, and I did the wrong thing.
And it seems like the reason he’s doing this is because the end of the cheerleading competition is coming up, and he needs to turn in his work.
-I wanted it to be of the highest quality possible. But it wasn’t enough for me to wear the gym clothes, I wanted to see it up close, so I wrote another letter.
If you don’t put your name on the letter, how did you expect me to respond?
-I knew I had to return the gym uniform. But when I was leaving school, I saw Kirishima-kun behind me, and I didn’t see the opportunity to be alone with her. I’m sorry,
-You should have been more direct with her and asked her whatever you want. And don’t praise her looks so much either, it gets to be too creepy for girls.
Then Yamanaka-kun shuts up.
-Do you like Hayasaka-san?
-If I didn’t, I wouldn’t have made her the heroine of my manga.
He’s right about that.
-It’s not like I want her to be my girlfriend or anything. No, to be honest, if she had accepted my request to be my model, I probably would have told her my feelings. But now it’s different, it’s not something I intend to do.
Then he went on to tell me about how he actually liked to observe everyone, since, in this way, he could interpret the environment and the people around him to create a good story.
-And, besides, I could tell that Hayasaka-san is always watching you, wherever you go. And Kirishima is doing all this for her. You know what that means, don’t you?
-Hayasaka-san loves someone else.
-I know.
Yamanaka-kun was in the same high school as Hayasaka, and at that time he overheard her talking to her friends about who she likes.
-There was a very popular boy in the grade above me at another high school. And I think I know you know him, since you went to that same school.
-Yes. It’s Yanagi-senpai, and she’s still in love with him.
– What’s that got to do with it? You love Hayasaka-san, don’t you?
Yamanaka-kun said something so unexpected that I couldn’t help but say, «What?» So he grabs his tablet and shows me a manga he’s working on.
-I tend to look into people’s eyes. They contain emotions. Even if I’m drawing the same character, I draw the eyes differently depending on the scene and the speaker.
-You’re quite an artist.
-I’m just a simple mangaka.
Yamanaka-kun draws a story in which the main character, a girl, has a love triangle with two boys. The girl’s model is Hayasaka-san.
-One of the boys is the senpai whom the heroine admires. And the other is a simple classmate.
-So, it’s a shoujo manga.
-Yes, I’ve liked them since I was a kid, all thanks to my sister.
I understand that feeling, I also read a lot because of my sister.
-The heroine at the end chooses her classmate instead of her senpai. Why do you think this happens?
-In shojo manga, the classmates are stronger than the attractive and gentle senpai.
-I see that you are an educated man.
But Yamanaka’s reason for ending the story that way is different.
-Admiration is a completely different thing from liking. It’s easy to confuse the two because they’re so similar. But the secret is in people’s hearts. There are many positive feelings, such as admiration, desire for affection and tenderness. But the pure feeling of love is much more special, and it is different from all the others.
-You have a very sensitive understanding of emotions.
-Maybe so. So, I think Hayasaka-san’s feelings for her senpai are only admiration. One day she will realize that. That’s not the same as liking someone. That’s why, somewhere deep inside me, I couldn’t give up Hayasaka-san. But, recently I have been able to realize that the true love reflected in her eyes is directed at the person she closely looks at every day.
-Which is?
Then I ask another question.
-By the way, do you also watch my eyes?
-So, do you want to know who you’re in love with?
-There are times when we don’t understand our emotions.
Yamanaka smiles at my words and says:
-I won’t tell you. I see a little resistance of acceptance in your eyes, not knowing that you are heartbroken. Kirishima-kun, you must be very confused.
-I see.
-Kirishima-kun, love is a cruel thing. I’ve been in love with Hayasaka-san since high school. I can’t think of anything else but her. There were nights when I had no choice but to keep sketching Hayasaka-san’s image in the back of my eyelids. But these feelings have nowhere to go, and will end up with no reward.
-I have often thought of those many unrequited loves.
-Hayasaka-san is many people’s special person. And yet, only one person likes you. If the people you love don’t like you, it’s also very cruel. I want Hayasaka-san’s feelings to be rewarded.
Yamanaka-kun then went back to his desk to work on his manga. He looked like he wanted to cry, so I decided to leave the room.
-I hope you win the manga contest.
-Thank you.
There was no one in the library after school. Tachibana-san’s boyfriend is absent from school, so her lovers’ study session will not take place today.
I found a copy of Tosa’s Diary on the shelf and spread it out on my desk. I need to catch up.
I jot down the conjugations of the auxiliary verbs in my textbook. Then someone walks in. It’s Hayasaka-san. She sits down next to me with a slightly embarrassed look on his face.
-That’s where Tachibana-san’s boyfriend always sits, isn’t it?
-From the pictures on social media, I’d say so.
-Did you choose randomly?
-There’s no news on social media today, so I decided to sit here and feel the frustration instead. So, her boyfriend is always here, always looking at her profile… It’s a shame.
-You’re beyond help.
Hayasaka-san laughs. She seemed to be in a good mood. Then, after a little hesitation, she sticks her body toward me.
-I thought you said you wouldn’t do anything weird at school anymore.
-It’s all Kirishima-kun’s fault!
-My fault?
-Yes, it’s not fair for you to be so kind.
-I still don’t understand the reasons.
-Forget it, I’m just being pushy… Just a little, just this once.
Hayasaka-san smiles. It looks like Yamanaka-kun told her everything.
-Hayasaka-san, from now on, if you have any problems, tell me directly.
-Yes. But even if I don’t tell you, Kirishima-kun will help me, right?
She leans her face against my chest.
-Hey, Hayasaka-san, what if someone sees us?
-It would be exciting.
No, no, no. This is bad, she has the personality of a bad girl.
-I’m sorry I asked you if I was your girlfriend the other day. It must have been a little upsetting for you.
-It wasn’t that bad.
-I won’t do things that are annoying anymore. From now on, I’ll be a better girlfriend.
-You’re already a good girlfriend.
-No, I’m always making Kirishima-kun worry about me, and you’re always careful about everything. So, you can feel free to do whatever you want. Whenever you feel down, I’ll be there to support you.
-I’m sorry about that, I don’t feel like I can do that.
-It’s okay. Because I’m Kirishima-kun’s girlfriend. I want to do what Kirishima-kun wants. I want to be the girl Kirishima-kun wants. I want to do everything for you.
-Hayasaka-san?
-Tachibana-san could have been hugged by her boyfriend in this very place, right?
Just imagining that scene makes my heart ache.
-I want you to do the same thing to me. I want you to do the same things that Tachibana-san’s boyfriend does with her. It’s nice that you take care of me. But I’d rather be touched, even if it hurts a little, than be displayed out of my reach.
Hayasaka-san seems to be very excited about the fact that I have solved her problem. Her facial expressions and gestures show that she loves me.
It’s not often that I receive such unconditional love from someone. It’s like a miracle.
-Kirishima-kun, Kirishima-kun, Kirishima-kun, Kirishima-kun, Kirishima-kun, Kirishima-kun, Kirishima-kun, Kirishima-kun.
But, isn’t that too much of an emotional accelerator? Hayasaka-san slowly grabs my wrist.
-I want Kirishima-kun to touch me.
She tries to put my hand on her chest and I rush to stop her.
-Hayasaka-san, wait a minute.
-Don’t you want to touch them?
I don’t know how to respond to this situation. I feel very confused. The other day I went through this same thing as well….
-I don’t do this kind of thing just because I feel like it.
Hayasaka-san says
-I know I’m the second one, but I also want to be a proper girlfriend.
-Hayasaka-san is an exemplary girlfriend.
-But if we weren’t lovers, we’d do a lot more.
-Yes, but… But you have to think about it. We are true lovers, but we are aware that we are each other’s number two. And you already have one person you love more than me, Hayasaka-san.
-Yes. But even if it’s number two, everything is fine with Kirishima-kun. That’s how I feel. So I want you to touch me. I want Kirishima-kun to let me in more.
Before I knew it, Hayasaka-san had unbuttoned the second button of her blouse.
-I also want to be a real girlfriend.
-Okay, but this is a library. There are a lot of windows.
-I don’t mind being seen. I want to show everyone how I feel about Kirishima-kun.
-If that happens, it will ruin Hayasaka-san’s image and there will be a big fuss.
-That’s fine. I’m not interested in people who impose that image on me. I didn’t like them from the beginning. The boys just want to do dirty things with me. And girls just want to have me as a pretty accessory by their side.
-Hayasaka-san?
-Everyone tries to fit me into their image. Innocent, kind, but what is that? But not Kirishima-kun. Only Kirishima-kun is different.
-You need to calm down a little.
-Kirishima-kun takes care of me properly. He cares about me, he helps me. That’s why I want to do something more special with him.
-Hayasaka-san, listen to me.
-I’d like everyone else to leave. All that matters is Kirishima-kun and me.
Hayasaka-san, you’re completely excited. I wonder if it’s a reaction to being repressed. But the more your words and actions fall apart, the more beautiful your expression becomes. There is an unhealthy fascination in your empty eyes.
-Will you accept me as I am, Kirishima-kun? You will accept me, won’t you? This is who I am. I won’t let anyone touch me. But I want you to touch me, Kirishima-kun. Please come and touch me.
Hayasaka-san grabbed my hand and pulled it to her chest. I was completely swept up by Hayasaka-san’s flow and couldn’t say a word.
-I like you, Kirishima-kun.
And my hand is about to touch Hayasaka-san’s chest. «Huh?» I’m even more surprised. Because she tried to put my hand into her blouse.
I can see the lace fabric on her chest. And she tries to stick her fingertips into the gap between the lace fabric.
-Hayasaka-san!
It’s not a matter of touching or not touching. It’s a matter of going further.
-I want to give it to Kirishima-kun. I’ll never give it to anyone else. But I want to give it all to you, Kirishima-kun. I want you to have it. You’ll have it, won’t you? Please take it.
The pressure’s on. When a girl gets serious, a guy probably won’t be able to resist.
At this rate, my fingertips are going to enter the hollow of her chest and touch something soft. Someone stop me. And at that moment, I hear footsteps in the hallway.
The light returns to Hayasaka-san’s eyes, which were empty. She seems to have come to her senses at the last moment.
We hurriedly separated, and at the same time the door opened. The hard footsteps stopped. The one who entered…
-President.
It was Tachibana-san
-What are you doing?
She looked at me and Hayasaka-san alternately with a puzzled look and nodded her head. It was Hayasaka-san who reacted immediately.
-W-We were just studying!
She’s behaving surprisingly suspiciously, but she’s back to her usual self.
-Tachibana-san should also have Kirishima-kun help her study! It’s easy to understand!
After saying this, she hurriedly buttoned up her blouse and left the library. When she left, Hayasaka-san clasped her hands together on Tachibana-san’s back, as if to say, «I’m sorry about before» . And then, with a worried look, she held up two fingers at the same time saying; «I will only be your second girlfriend.»
Thus the storm passed and Tachibana-san and I were left.
-What are you doing here, Tachibana-san?
-I have to study.
Tachibana-san replied with a sullen face. Then she sat down next to me with a frown on her face.
-I always do it in this place.
She spreads out her study material and passes the pencil silently. I’m off to work on my homework for now, too. It’s a relief to have some peace and quiet again. The time is flying by.
I’m sure Hayasaka-san got lost in the heat of the moment. For now I’ll just try to calm down.
However, Tachibana-san grabbed me by the collar after she solved two math test problems.
-Why were you studying with Hayasaka-san?
She said with an angry tone.