I’m Not Doing This With A Friend - Chapter 57

It’s an absolute ‘no‘.

 

“Sorry. It’s too much”.

 

Despite refusing twice in a row, Carson made an apologetic face on the contrary.

 

“No. I don’t think I have been considerate enough of you. Is it okay if we meet outside?”

 

“…Well. If it’s possible.”

 

I couldn’t give you a definite answer. I don’t know how things will go, I’m not sure.

 

Perhaps, as soon as I arrived at the Count, I could run away to the academy again.

 

Maybe it’s because I said a lot of misleading words, but Carson stared at me with a thoughtful expression on his face.

 

I smiled mischievously and tapped his nose.

 

“What are you thinking? I said this because I might not even notice the time passing because I was looking at medicinal herbs. It’s been a while since I’ve gone to my private lab at the Countess.”

 

“Really…?”

 

His hardened face came alive again at my words.

 

“Then on the day you come out, I’ll visit you, Leen.”

 

“How do you know the timing that I don’t even know?”

 

When I laughed as if dumbfounded, Carson blinked his eyes and put his index finger over his lips.

 

“It’s a trade secret.”

 

 

✿

 

 

From the window of the carriage, a familiar mansion came into view.

 

The aunt, who was standing still, found a carriage entering the mansion and smiled broadly.

 

“Leen!”

 

I got off the carriage with a smile around my lips.

 

“Auntie, how have you been…”

 

Before I could finish my words, my Aunt reached out her hand and held me in her arms.

 

“Oh my, look at how skinny my baby is. Only bones are left! Did you skip meals just to see medicinal herbs? Oh, I can’t let this be. Hurry up and talk to the chef about greasy food!”

 

“No, Aunt. I was eating well and I’m fine.”

 

Jane was obsessed with rice, and Carson often bought snacks for me.

 

Under these circumstances, if I had gained more weight, I wouldn’t have lost weight.

 

“Last summer vacation, you said the professor caught you, but this time I think you managed to escape.”

 

“Haha!”

 

I smiled awkwardly and looked into the distance. I forgot I sold Professor George last vacation.

 

Sorry, Professor. There was no other excuse.

 

However, this time, it was true that I escaped from Professor George’s cage, so it was roughly half right.

 

“Yeah, vacation is for rest. Your professor was too much.”

 

 

My Aunt cried and hugged me tight once again.

 

It was the arms I missed, so I enjoyed the warmth in my Aunt’s arms for a while.

 

It’s hard to breathe, so I was trying to tell her to let go of me now…

 

“Leen’s here!”

 

Upon hearing the news from the mansion, the Count rushed out and hugged my Aunt and me at the same time.

 

“Hey! If you were going to come, tell me in advance, what’s the reason for sending a letter so slowly? I only found out in the morning that you were coming.”

 

It was a scolding tone, but his face was full of joy. I just laughed bashfully seeing him like that.

 

“I wanted to surprise you!”

 

“If that’s the case, then you’ve succeeded. The Count has been very noisy since morning after receiving the letter that you are coming.”

 

“Haha, the Count and Aunt must have made all kinds of commotion.”

 

“Our disturbance is the Count’s commotion, is there anything different?”

 

I shrugged and frowned without saying a word. What I heard was right.

 

The Count, who was hugging my aunt and me, finally freed us and looked straight at me.

 

“Oh my! You’ve grown ten centimeters, you seem bigger than I’ve seen you! You became an adult without us watching over you.”

 

How could my aunt and uncle not be so objective in their view of me?

 

Unfortunately, I wasn’t even a centimeter taller in a year.

 

At that time, someone who was watching our reunion walked up to us.

 

“People would think you’re reuniting with family who were separated during the war.”

 

It was my younger cousin Luca who was smiling crookedly.

 

I instinctively looked around Luca. Fortunately, Erhan didn’t seem to be in the mansion.

 

Had it been, he would have run to me faster than anyone else.

 

Imagining how anxious he must have been because I never replied to his letter.

 

Convinced that Erhan wasn’t there, I teased Luca more comfortably.

 

“Are you upset because you didn’t hug me first? Even now, you’re still like a child, it’s still the same. Come here.”

 

“Who says I’m upset?”

 

Saying that, Luca didn’t ignore the open arms as if there’s nothing he couldn’t help it.

 

Being in my arms…

 

“I came to the mansion alone because I thought you wouldn’t come again. We could have come together.”

 

I was surprised by his grumbling words in my arms.

 

Come to think of it, Luca was also attending the Arena Academy.

 

“Sorry. I didn’t think of you because the junior and senior building were too far apart.”

 

“I’ll also be a senior starting next semester, so you know that excuse won’t work next time, right?”

 

“Well, I’ll think about it.”

Late at night.

 

Hearing that there was a small disturbance in the Count’s mansion, I intuited that Erhan had arrived.

 

Now that I’ve walked in here on my feet, meeting Erhan was planned.

 

It’s what it feels like to meet him, but it wasn’t the worst I had envisioned.

 

I slowly walked out of the door, controlling my confused mind.

 

I didn’t have to bother looking for him.

 

When he arrived at the mansion, I’m sure he would come running here as soon as he heard that I was here.

 

Unsurprisingly, soon after, he stood in front of me in his unkempt clothes.

 

His hair was tangled behind him, and the cravat around his neck was half loose.

 

Crucially, I could feel a strong intoxication from him as he approached.

 

I was nervous because it had been a long time since we met. Strangely, as I faced him, my heart beat calmly.

 

I was able to look at him with colder eyes.

 

“You…!”

 

There was a clear anger in Erhan’s voice.

 

But, conscious of not being able to shout here now, he grabbed my wrist and lowered his voice.

 

“Please talk to me…”

 

Still, I guess it seemed that he couldn’t control the seething emotions.

 

He looked at me and glared as if he wanted to drag me into the room right away.

 

I felt the pain from his strong hand. I squealed, twisting my hand out.

 

“Can we possibly talk properly when you’re drunk? Ah, indeed. Even if you don’t drink, it’s no big deal because you talk crap every time.”

 

“This is crazy…!”

 

“Shut up. Unless you want to advertise this side of yours to the Count and Aunt.”

 

In this place where there may be ears to hear and eyes to see, I also decline to do this conversation right now.

 

I’ve been hiding this for some reason…

 

When I opened the door, I invited one of the people I least wanted to invite.

 

“You look like you have a lot to say, come on in. If you want to bark, bark here.”

 

A few years ago someone put soundproofing magic in my room. No matter what I shout inside, nobody would hear it outside.

 

Even if it’s a scream.

 

The fact that my room had soundproofing magic was terrifying, but sometimes it helped in this way.

 

“Ha, if you keep your mouth shut.”

 

Exposing his feelings with a short breath, he pushed me roughly into the room.

 

As I closed the door and walked in, he sat down on my bed as if it was natural.

 

The sight of the scene raised a great deal of anger.

 

“Dirty.”

 

“What? What did you just say? Is your liver out of your stomach now?”

 

His sharp eyes glared at me as if they were piercing me, but I ignored them and continued my thoughts.

 

…I’ll have to ask the maid to change my blanket before I go to bed.

 

Erhan’s exhaled breath felt terrible, so I would need to open the window and ventilate the room as soon as he got out.

 

Should I clean the floor too?

 

It looked like there was a lot of work to be done. I’d rather stay up all night in the lab today.

 

Arriving in front of Erhan before I knew it, I tilted my head.

 

“Before we start the conversation, let me ask you one thing. Were you and I close enough to talk at night?”

 

But Erhan ignored my words completely and said what he had to say.

 

“Why did you run away to the academy without telling me?”

 

His way of speaking made me laugh.

 

‘Ran away…?’

 

It was true, but those words coming out of his mouth made me feel even worse.

 

It was proof that he thought of me as a possession. Or to him, I was something like a parasite living in his house.

 

“Don’t go astray and answer me, Erhan.”

 

As if he had changed his strategy, he suddenly began to appeal by acting as my brother.

 

“I am your brother. I think I have the right to talk with my younger sister whom I haven’t seen in a long time. And even more so if that younger sister ran away without saying a word to me.”

 

I expected it, but I was mentally exhausted as I was listening to such nonsensical words from him.

 

He’s the one who drank, but why does my head hurt?

 

“Did you ever think of me as a real part of the family? Have you ever acted like a brother, not a pretense?”

 

Then, Erhan, as if waiting, raised the corners of his lips.

 

“Don’t you remember? Who was it that got you out there crying in the corner of your room?”

 

…Yes, it was.

 

It was Luca and Erhan who reached out to me, and I was able to hold them and escape that room.

 

But, that’s really the only thing he could put forward.

 

I followed him with a drawn smile on my lips.

 

“Erhan, you know, I can’t stand your pretense ”

 

As I spit out the words contained inside my heart, it became difficult to keep the smile I had been forced to make.

 

I opened my mouth without knowing what expression I was making.

 

“Even then, you were trying to protect the image of a friendly older brother or son. How about it? Am I wrong?”

 

“Whatever my motives at the time, it doesn’t change the fact that I pulled you out of the mud.”

 

His face was brazen and his mouth was unstoppable.

 

“And look, my parents think you’re a child at heart. What do you mean you and I aren’t siblings? Do you know that’s a disgraceful word?”

 

“Don’t be ridiculous. The person who thought I was his sister, when my aunt tried to register me as a daughter. Didn’t you object that much?”

 

Erhan’s face hardened slightly.

“…How did you know?”

 

“Well. How else would I know?”

 

He shuddered as if to hold back his anger when I smiled. Blood vessels rise in his fist.

 

“Don’t play with words. I’m serious right now.”

 

“I’m also serious.”

 

As he chewed his lips. I’ve been hitting back at that look for minutes, too.

 

Finally, Erhan’s mouth came up with a topic that could be called the main point.

 

“Have you read the letter? It’s impossible not to read any. I’ve sent a few. Isn’t it? You must have read at least one.”

 

“You think I will read it? A letter from you? I haven’t read a single word.”

 

Erhan’s eyes trembled as he saw me answering, not resolutely.

 

“What are you thinking! That envelope contained more than just my letter!”

 

As expected, he tried to contact me through Erhan.

 

From the moment the letter smelled like lavender, I thought it was strange.

 

I was almost certain when I saw him send a letter uncharacteristically.

 

Sending them out once every few months would have been enough to pretend to be a sweet brother to others.

 

His younger brother, Luca, hasn’t exchanged a single letter with me.

 

It was funny…

 

Erhan, you wouldn’t even know why he ordered the letter to be sprayed with lavender perfume.

 

The first day I met him. It was because I gave him lavender flowers.

 

The day I handed over lavender flowers. It was the beginning of love for him, but it was the beginning of misery for me.

 

To get rid of the faint memories of the past, I strengthened my voice.

 

“So I didn’t read it. If it had been your letter, I might have read it. I wondered what kind of pretentious words you filled the letter with.”

 

Erhan laughed at me, raising the corners of his mouth as if they were the same.

 

“Do you think you can get away from Rex by doing that?”

 

Rex Begonia.

 

I heard the name before I knew it.

 

In an instant, my body started to tremble and my heart started to beat faster.

 

I couldn’t help but close my eyes. Let’s calm down.

 

He can’t come here right now. Why is he contacting me through Erhan?

 

It’s only Erhan in front of me. It’s not Rex Begonia.

 

A fool who doesn’t even know he’s being used.

 

As I was hypnotizing myself over the fact that Rex Begonia was not in front of me, I heard Erhan’s incomprehensible voice.

 

“Why on earth are you rejecting Rex? You must be well aware that it would be beneficial to you if you bounced back while raising your pride like that, right?”

 

“Do I look like I’m building up my pride?”

 

Emotions that could not be captured from the exasperation were spewing out. I glared sharply at Erhan.

 

“Just hearing his name makes me shudder. My heart felt jammed. And yet, do I look like I’m just playing around!”

 

Erhan didn’t seem to care what I was feeling or whatever I said.

 

This time, Erhan only told his own story.

 

“My situation has become very difficult since you fled to the academy. If Rex doesn’t have you back, he’ll recoup the investment in the project I’m working on.”

 

“You said I’m your sister. What’s the difference between what you’re saying now and selling your sister?”

 

I could feel the sour taste in my mouth.

 

In the end, he just didn’t want to lose what he had invested with as collateral.

 

How low is that?

 

“It’s for sale. It was a job for you. Think about it. Rex is the heir to the Duke of Begonia. You’re going to be a Duke’s mistress. If you act up next to me, you’ll be able to enjoy the rest of your life.”

 

Does Erhan know that Rex, that bastard whispered to me that he would give me the Duchess’ seat?

 

I hate even that so much that I refuse it, but it could not sound convincing to be a mistress and be hospitable.

 

“Now that my parents are still taking care of you, that’s why you don’t like it.”

 

He laughed bitterly.

 

“But what about after I take over the Count? You don’t have anyone to support you anymore. You will lose all support and be kicked out of this place. All you can do is sort out a few herbs. No matter how much you earn, how much life can you enjoy like this? Living like a herb?”

 

…Like a herb?

 

Cursing ran up to the tip of my throat. I felt sick to my stomach because of the disgust that I couldn’t spit out inside.

 

“You’d better be obedient and docile while Rex is still obsessed with you. You don’t know when he’ll change his mind because he said he fell in love at first sight, right?”

 

At those words, I flinched.

 

Reminding me of someone in pink who fell in love with me at first sight. It awakened me to the cold reality.

 

Erhan was excited and started to talk about what he mistook me for.

 

“There’s a party hosted by the Duke of Begonia next week.”

 

The moment I heard those words, I knew immediately what was going to happen next.

 

“I won’t say much. Just attend.”

 

Yes. You don’t go beyond expectations.

 

Now I didn’t even have the strength to ridicule him anymore.

 

He grabbed my chin and lifted it up as I stared blankly exhausted.

 

“I’ll tell Rex that you’re coming, and if you don’t, you and I are both doomed. Do you understand?”

 

I stared at him without saying a word. How long have we been making eye contact?

 

“A year of bad luck.”

 

He spat on the floor and left the room.