It’s My First Time Being Loved - Chapter 41

The day after reaching the capital, my mother declared,

 

“We definitely have to go out today.”

 

Mumbling quietly that there would be no other opportunity if not now.

 

Then, my mother dressed us with thick coats.

 

The three of us wore a set of fur coats with bear ears.

 

“Oh dear, my cute babies.”

 

My mother put it on us and stood up, then hugged us three with a very proud face.

 

Then she said with a happy face.

 

“Let’s go sightseeing, the streets are very beautiful during the end of the year.”

 

I could feel a subtle excitement from my mother’s face, which was full of worries before coming to the capital.

 

However, for some reason, my mother herself wore a thick coat and a hat with a small veil to slightly cover her face.

 

As if she didn’t want anyone to recognize her.

 

Like carrying out a secret operation, even the carriage was prepared without the symbol of the Duchy and we all got in it together.

 

‘Does mother want to look around the capital city?’

 

Well, I thought it was understandable, since there would be talk about the Queen being pregnant at the upcoming New Year’s Ball.

 

The carriage moved at a much more relaxed pace compared to when we were travelling to the capital from the duchy.

 

Soon, I could see the streets of the capital from the window at a glance.

 

‘Wow, as my mother said……’

 

The moment I thought so, my sister next to me shouted.

 

“Pretty!”

 

She took the words right out of my heart.

 

“Do you like it?”

 

“Yes! Together with Mom, Lara, Dad, brother, Shasha, it’s full of colours!”

 

As my excited sister said, colourful decorations were hung on each tree and lamps on the street.

 

Not only that, but each house had a unique wreath hanging on their door.

 

“It’s a tiger! A tiger! The tiger that Shasha likes.”

 

Some house’s wreath had a tiger carved, and at that voice, my brother’s eyes became round.

 

“That’s right, Anastasia loves the tiger doll her brother gave her.”

 

It was a voice with pride.

 

“I know right, it would have been nice if mom and dad had chosen a better doll for our youngest.”

 

In an instant, three pairs of eyes gathered.

 

‘H-how should I react?’

 

When I opened my eyes wide in embarrassment, for some reason, the three people burst into laughter.

 

“Shasha’s startled!”

 

“I’m not saying you need to say something, Anastasia.”

 

My sister and brother talked softly simultaneously trying to soothe me.

 

My mother also stroked my head and talked as if she was just happy.

 

“We’re talking about how we didn’t recognize that you’re a baby who liked tigers more than rabbit dolls.”

 

The look of the doll was not particularly important….. 

 

My older brother who gave it to me had such a lovely smile so of course I Iiked it……

 

I was teased unexpectedly, but it didn’t feel bad.

 

Because all of my family members were laughing.

 

My heart felt ticklish again.

 

* * *

 

Even in the duchy, we went down to the people’s village and looked around the shopping district.

 

However, I definitely felt that the scale and diversity were different.

 

‘The duchy’s village felt so small that I thought it was on purpose.’

 

It was as if they had created a rural life that seemed to have been drawn on purpose.

 

“Mom, Lara wants to buy this ribbon.”

 

Thanks to this, my family and I were already looking around the fourth boutique.

 

‘Was I thinking too seriously again when I thought our purpose was to observe the public?’

 

As I had lived many previous lives as such , I tend to instinctively think that there were secret intentions in people’s actions.

 

But, my mother and sister were shopping peacefully.

 

My sister already said ‘buy’ for the third time, and as I came to the dressing room, I learned one of her habits.

 

My sister, who usually talks comfortably to our parents, only used honorifics in cute ways during times like this.

 

“But you already bought two today?”

 

“Yess, This is not for Lara.”

 

“Then?”

 

“I’m going to give it to Shasha.”

 

My sister said so, she held the ribbon preciously and looked up at her mother with desperate eyes.

 

“Shasha doesn’t really say she wants anything. Lara is her older sister, so I have to take care of her.”

 

“It’s not something that Lara wants?”

 

Then my sister shook her head at her words.

 

“This is a forsythia colour, so it will suit Shasha better than Lara.”

 

“In mom’s eyes, Lara will also look good with a pretty forsythia colour though?”

 

“Uhhh, noo! It looks better on Shasha.”

 

Then, my older sister murmured with a slightly troubled face.

 

“But, I’m always troubled since Shasha looks good in everything.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Lara wants to give her all of the ribbons but then Shasha goes “This is Sister’s”.”

 

My mother burst into a small laugh at my sister’s words.

 

And I felt my cheeks slightly getting hot.

 

‘But if I don’t say that, you’ll probably keep on giving everything to me.’

 

It wasn’t just once or twice.

 

She sometimes wakes up suddenly after taking a nap.

 

“Shasha! Look at this! I saw Shasha wearing this hat in my dream and it was so pretty! I’ll give it to Shasha?” 

 

“Look, look. I had this when I was young, isn’t it pretty? I cleaned it to give to Shasha!” 

 

“This is a brooch that your sister worked hard to collect. What do you like, Shasha? Sister will give it to you! But what would be good? I think this will suit you, but that also looks good..’ 

 

She ran to me if she had something to give and she would try to give me her cherished things. 

 

However, I too… 

 

‘I want to see you doing those cute things.’

 

That’s why I just said that it was yours.

 

It was also really yours. 

 

Nevertheless, I became shy for no reason, so I was looking at the other hat on purpose as if feigning indifference.

 

And then,

 

“Our Anastasia, do you want this?”

 

My brother naturally came up to my side and held the hat at the end of my gaze.

 

The hat made for children was a fluffy fur hat with a cute pompom.

 

“If brother gives a present to our youngest, will you accept it?”

 

Huh? 

 

“Listening to Laurensia’s story, I somehow thought that although I’m your older brother, I really don’t give you presents.”

 

No, no it’s not like that, Brother. 

 

It’s totally fine.

 

In that sense, I shook my head, and my brother’s eyes suddenly drooped.

 

“…Did Brother choose the wrong hat that Shasha wanted?”

 

“Nwoo.”

 

“Then is it burdensome for Brother to give you a present?”

 

Huh? No, why did the conclusion become like that? 

 

“You even accepted a gift from Mikhail.”

 

Were you even jealous of him? 

 

I had a lot of words to say.

 

It is true that I accepted gifts from Mikhail, but I rejected everything except what I really needed.

 

It was only to the point where I would contemplate whether I should accept one if he brought ten…..

 

“You really don’t like Brother giving you things?”

 

When he asked again, I shook my head immediately.

 

Then my brother’s green eyes quickly brightened.

 

With a soft smile, he took his wallet out of his pocket.

 

‘… This is why I shook my head.’

 

My brother giving me a gift means that he will take it from his pocket money.

 

I don’t think I should rob the wallet of a seven-year-old child…..

 

* * *

 

After that, I looked around the capital with my family until sunset.

 

We also went to various stores, and my mother rarely decided to eat out outside.

 

I was able to use my fork diligently because I could eat regular meals after 18 months.

 

Although I couldn’t do it only with the food served by the duchy’s chef.

 

After such a pleasant and enjoyable outing, as soon as we got on the carriage going back home, my sister fell asleep, perhaps tired.

 

Unlike when we came, it was very quiet in the carriage.

 

‘So sister is the one in charge of noise in the family.’

 

If not, it would be dad.

 

Realising the new fact, I strengthened my eyelids to resist the drowsiness that came.

 

My brother looked at me and patted me on the back as if telling me I could sleep.

 

When my eyelids became so heavy that I couldn’t stand it, my brother asked my mother with a whisper.

 

“Is there anything you’re worried about, Mother?”

 

“Hm?”

 

“When you’re with us, Mother’s expression doesn’t look that scary.”

 

At that, I heard my mother’s voice saying, “Oh my.”

 

I thought that I couldn’t help my already closed eyes, and I tried hard to keep at least my ears open.

 

“Mom was like that?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“It’s nothing, I guess it’s because it’s been a while since I visited the capital.”

 

However, despite my efforts, perhaps because my brother’s touch is so warm I was dragged away by that touch to sleep.

 

But even when I fell asleep, I half heard why my mother was bothered.

 

‘As expected, my mother opened her ears to people’s conversations.’

 

From all kinds of stores to restaurants.

 

‘…We went around the capital like that.’

 

No one was talking about the royal couple’s happy occasion.

 

‘Rather, there were only people who were worried because there was no successor.’

 

Grand Duke Leventis doesn’t seem to be the someone who would let out groundless words though.

 

* * *

 

Not long after, my mother’s concern reached the Duchy’s townhouse as a bad omen.

 

“What are you……”

 

My mother looked at father with disbelief.

 

And Father’s face was not so good either.

 

Originally, his face was as fierce as a wolf, but it was often soft in front of his family.

 

“What do you mean by all aristocratic families should attend the place where the priest is invited, including children.”

 

My mother asked as if it was a ridiculous request.

 

“The New Year’s ball starts in the evening and lasts until late at night. Yet he asked to bring the children! Just what is His Highness thinking?”

 

My father sighed deeply.

 

“It’s not like I and others didn’t stop His Highness.”

 

“Of course! If you didn’t stop him, that would be negligence.”

 

My mother said so and muttered in an unusually fierce tone.

 

“Just what kind of foolish scheme is my brother up to?”

 

Somehow, I felt that it sounded like a beast in front of its prey.