Looking for My Fiancé’s Lover - Chapter 0

My name is Katrina Ezellot.

I am the youngest daughter of Count Ezellot, the only young miss of County Ezellot located in the northeastern part of the Caval Empire…

No, it would be more precise to say that I was a fifteen-year-old young girl known for the misfortune I brought.

“Ron.”

“Yes, Your Highness.”

“Take out the pledge.”

Expectedly, some people would be terrified and some would show displeasure as soon as they heard my name. Either way, one thing was certain that none of those who heard my name would react positively.

In reality, my personality was nothing more than a spoiled brat.

“Your Highness, your seal?”

“I’ve got it.”

“The fountain pen.”

“Here you are.”

My nicknames among the nobility were very diverse. From the invisible lady, the selfish lady, to Ezellot’s fool and jinx girl.

I inwardly laughed at them for swearing behind my back, I guessed they did not have enough courage to say it to my face after all, but there was actually nothing false about those expressions listed earlier.

Even I admitted myself as selfish and unlucky.

“Give Kate one, too.”

“Yes, Lady Katrina? Here’s your fountain pen.”

I had a good reason for making the confession above.

Fortunately, it was not a letter of remorse because I was caught doing something wrong, or a commitment of changing for the better by reversing the past evil deeds.

“Lady Katrina?”

This would be insanely hard to believe, but…I had just remembered my past life in my fifteenth year of life.

And even in the midst of forming an engagement pledge with Crown Prince Nezar!

“Hey, Kate. What on earth are you thinking?”

My shoulders flinched at the voice that suddenly hit my conscience, I raised my head. Nezar, who was sitting across from the drawing room, was looking at me with his cold eyes.

“I have brought you the pledge of engagement just like you implored while clinging to me crying. I don’t suppose you are protesting just because I didn’t prepare a bouquet of flowers for you, right?”

Nezar’s voice, accompanied by a sigh, was colder and harder than the frozen snow in the winter.

I shook my head hastily at his words and took the fountain pen from Ron. Now, if I signed at the bottom of this parchment, my engagement to Nezar would be established, what I had long desired, would finally be fulfilled.

The engagement that I achieved by throwing away my pride as an aristocratic young lady, exchanged by shed tears and runny nose, tarnishing my own reputation and image.

“Don’t get carried away and sign quickly. You know I’m not a very leisure person.”

Nezar criticised me once again, but my hands were so stiff that I could not move.

In my previous life, I was a seventeen-year-old high school girl, but I could not remember clearly how I lost my life. However, what was certain was that the me in my previous life was not a person of this world.

Actually, the part in which my previous life was a high school girl who passed away at a young age was not that much of a big deal.

Because I was reborn as the youngest daughter of a prominent aristocratic family and had all the food I wanted to eat and the clothes I wanted to wear, I was truly enjoying the favour of a lavish daily life in a well-off family.

Therefore, the real problem was not that I was reborn either…

“Kate, are you going to sign it?”

But it was that Prince Nezar, who was to be engaged to me, did not like me.

“Now, wait a minute. I suddenly feel dizzy.”

I was sweating profusely at Nezar’s press, still, I strived to delay signing as much as possible.

In aristocratic society, arranged marriages between certain families are prevalent.

However, it was usually the responsibility of the heir or the eldest daughter of a family, or like me, the youngest child who grew up in a family with a big name and fortune, got to choose a marriage partner who they thought was suitable.

In my case, the ‘desired man’ for me was the Crown Prince of the Caval Empire, Nezar Audrine Caval.

However, this was only from one side, my side, and I was often disliked by Nezar, my unrequited love, for chasing after him relentlessly.

He once made fun of me and told me to stop acting like a child when he forced me to eat paprika, which I especially hated. There was also a time when he ridiculed my shallow knowledge level and made me go through boring books on literacy, and later at night, he disguised as a ghost, and hid in my bedroom, making me spill with tears.

“What did you do last night that made yourself dizzy?”

“I really didn’t do anything. I slept peacefully yesterday.”

As I tried to remember each and every one of the methods he had used to torment me, the fact that he did not like me became clearer than ever.

If I had to sign this parchment and later marry Nezar, only a terrible marriage awaited me.

He would not sleep with me, so we would not be able to have children, and then his concubines would only increase as time passed, and my place would gradually disappear. I would never be able to occupy a single corner in his cold heart. And once I had been completely forgotten, I would be living in loneliness when I grew old.

A life as a lonely old lady! It was terrible! I did not even want to imagine such a future.

“Then what’s the matter? Do I have to sign it for you?”

Of course, Nezar was unaware of my complicated mind and continued to urge me to sign the document. Now, unlike before, his voice was so heavy that I could no longer postpone the signing.

I brought the fountain pen to the parchment with a trembling hand. Like ink spreading black, it felt like a black stain was also spreading in my heart.

But I had no reason to refuse my betrothal to Nezar. This engagement was the result of my hard-earned pursuit for him after months.

How could the main culprit who committed the crime dare to claim that it was null and void?

“I-I did.”

And so, I ended up leaving my signature on the finest parchment, which was engraved with the Emperor’s seal. My clumsy handwriting, which was like a doodle drawing, was imprinted right next to Nezar’s elegant one.

Sigh, I was so done for. I was sure I would be harassed for the rest of my life and then thrown away…

“Tsk, if you were going to do it, why not do it quickly.”

Nezar lightly kicked his tongue as he took the parchment from me. After having examined the contents and the confirmed signatures of the pledge carefully, he handed the parchment to his assistant who was standing next to him. His aide, Ron, bowed down and accepted the pledge.

Brown hair with red shade, dark copper eyes and an unblemished face which had no wrinkles on it, Ron looked quite young for a middle-aged man. A satisfied smile was hung on that spotless face.

As I stared blankly at the series of processes, the memory of the first day I met Nezar came to my mind.

How did I even fall head over heels for Nezar in the first place? Why did I have to dig my own grave?

It was not exactly love at first sight.

At that time, I was craving affection, and of course there was nothing I could not do to get my family’s attention. However, the only person who soothed that loneliness and emptiness was Nezar. The first time I met him was when my desire for affection was at its peak.

On a snowy midwinter night, I was cremating a teddy bear damaged by the laundry. I curled myself up tightly in the snow-covered garden and lit a dry branch on fire by myself.

Not long after, a boy I had never seen before suddenly appeared over the flaming cotton doll. Years later, that piece of memory was still imprinted in my mind clearly, as if it had only been yesterday. Relying on a bonfire, his pure white face, with barely visible outlines, was delicate and elegant like a piece of glass work.

“Who are you?”

At my question, the boy, who was like a finely painted picture, slowly parted his lips.

“Your brother’s friend.”

The boy with a heterogeneous demeanor had a low and calm voice, unlike his beautiful appearance.

But whether the boy’s appearance resembled an angel or a devil had nothing to do with me. Rather, I did not really like him since he spied on me while I was saying good-bye to Teddy Bear. I would rather my mother or my siblings had come, that way I would at least feel like talking to them. I clenched my teeth and cried out in a nervous tone as soon as my patience ran out.

“What are you looking at? Don’t you see that I’m a bit down here? Why don’t you go away?”

Just for a reminder, until I remembered my previous life, I was a selfish aristocratic young girl.

I thought if I ordered him rudely like that, he would disappear. Usually, the servants of the castle would run away frightened or wearied right after I said just a few words of abusive language. So it would be no different with a boy.

However, my anticipation and the boy’s reaction were slightly, no, tremendously different. Far from being surprised, he raised one of his striking eyebrows and opened his mouth with an expressionless face.

“Don’t you think that if there are many guests, your grizzly bear, which is destined to be burnt to death, will be more happy?”

How did he know that I was saying farewell to my teddy bear?

I threw at him with even harsher words out of embarrassment, but the boy did not even blink  no matter how much I cursed him. Rather, he just shook his head and laughed out loud sardonically, it rang in my ear, making my face reddened with rage.

Running in the snow and causing a ruckus all day, I ended up with a bad cold. In the meantime, my mother, who was driven up the wall, made quite a fuss when she heard about it and eventually punished me.

It was a night when I hid in my blanket, soothing my loneliness and pain with tears welled up in my eyes. Nezar, the boy I thought to have disappeared, came to see me again.

He seemed to feel pity for me, who was chasing him after a long day to get attention. After talking about this and that to show that he meant no harm, he began to ask a strange question.

“Is there anything you want to do?”

What I want to do? I frowned in deep thought and shook my head slowly.

“There is no such thing.”

“If you don’t have one, make one. For four days in Ezellot estate, I will play with you all day.”

“Why?”

At my question, Nezar furrowed his eyebrows for a moment.

“There’s no specific reason. If you don’t like it, you can say no.”

He was right, but I had no intention of refusing it. I jumped out of my bed and grabbed Nezar’s hand before he could leave.

He was the first person beside my family to show interest in me in this spacious Castle of Ezellot. The pounding of my heart could not have sounded more delightful.

“I don’t hate it at all!”

After that, I stuck to Nezar and followed him everywhere like his tail, I regarded him as my own brother.

Nothing else was needed. From that day onwards, the greatest meaning of my life was neither me nor my family, but Nezar.

Well…looking back on it, I guessed it was worth falling for.

I shook my head side to side to regain consciousness and looked straight ahead. I did not have the confidence to make eye contact with Nezar, so I raised my chin a little, pretending everything was okay. For some queer reason, a soft arc was formed on Ron’s lips.

“At last, Lady Katrina’s long-awaited engagement has come true. I will bring this pledge to His Majesty the Emperor. Congratulations on your engagement, Miss.”

Nezar snorted at his words.

My mind was complicated when I thought of my past life, my chest was stuffy when I thought about the future.

As sorrow loomed over me, I covered my face with my hands. I was simply trying to hide my distorted face, but my vision suddenly blurred? Tears were unintentionally rolling down my cheeks.

“Oh dear, miss! Why would you cry on a happy day like this?”

Ron’s voice was filled with joy, not a grain of sadness was mixed in there, which was totally opposite to my messed up state.

Did he think these were the tears of joy? I was crying because I was distraught!

If the situation had been set like this, then there was only one way out. Finding a woman that Nezar might fall in love with, and making him break this engagement himself.

I ceased my tears and secretly vowed to myself. I would find a woman who will surely make him restless!

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Note: Further explanation for those who are still confused about Katrina’s sudden change of heart.

We have translated exactly what was written in the original, and there was no mention that the current world she’s living in was a novel she had read in her previous life, so this will be a little different from those cliches you have read before. The only reason was said to be that she had remembered her past life, plus it had nothing to do with her present life, and it was only mentioned briefly. In other words, this is a very trivial background detail to account for her change, just like any other cliches, but just that it was written rather cursory. Although it’s brief, we believe it’s still possible for her to have that sort of change in such a short while. Let’s place yourself in her shoes for a moment. Gaining memory of another life is not so much different from being possessed by someone as those memories remain fresh and vivid in your mind as you have experienced them yourself. Therefore, at the very moment when the memory came to her (tho we don’t know how ¯_(ツ)_/¯), it has occurred that the original Katrina and her past soul co-existed in one body, you can also say that she had the perspectives of 2 separate persons, and at the same time it’s felt like she had gained the experiences of another 17 years of life, just like she said — she was somehow reborn. Under that circumstance, a lot of enlightenment hit her, she finally realised how childish and blindly she had been from a more objective viewpoint, and became anxious about the future. Just in case you don’t know, her reference about the future (like this part: He would not even sleep with me, so we would not be able to have children,….I would be living in loneliness when I grew old…) and how he hated her, they were not her foreseeing into the future, but more like her speculation and baseless assumption, so it’s right to say that she was clueless about what was to come.

This is, however, just our hypothetical thought, 100% opinion. After a brief discussion, this is the best explanation we could give you guys, if you think differently, we would love it if you can share with us. And please do not drop this novel because of this minor matter, you might miss the fluffy stuff in the following chapters. Thank you for reading until the very end, hope you will continue to support this novel (*＾3＾)/～♡