Love Delusion - Chapter 9

It was late, and Shang Hao’s people were leaning on the bedside, still reading their emails. Lin Anran in pajamas brushed his teeth outside and came in. Shang Hao glanced at him and put down the phone.

Lin Anran’s small room is not very big either. One person walked to the bed, and the other opened his hand, like two satellites coming into orbit as a matter of course, and they stuck together silently and tacitly.

Shang Hao touched his hair’s ears, and Lin Anran, half of whom was lying on him, remained silent for a long time. With a little effort, he turned over in the present posture with Lin Anran, and turned the person onto the bed.

The mattress collapsed under the pressure of two people, and only warm breathing remained in the room, like a lullaby without a tune.

Lin Anran lay quietly on his shoulders, without responding for a long time. Shang Hao put a hand on the back of his neck again, rubbing that spot very slowly.

After maintaining this posture for a while, Shang Hao thought that he was asleep. He was about to lean over to turn off the bedside lamp. When he lowered his head, he saw Lin Anran’s lower jaw move faintly, like a little rabbit eating grass, very regular and regular. quietly.

Shang Hao smashed Ran Ran’s face with one hand, and then he could see clearly that a small corner of his clothes was held in his mouth, he was buried in his face, and he rubbed his pajamas with his teeth little by little.

Shang Hao:…

He understands Lin Anran, and he also knows what he is doing with such small movements.

Like an extremely polite mole, intending to sneak a hole in him in a way that does not disturb his master.

Of course he was sick. He is sick and speechless. What he wants and what he doesn’t want, unless he is forced to be helpless, he can’t say it.

From his perspective, Shang Hao can’t understand why expressing his needs is a trouble to others for Lin Anran.

At least in front of him, he hopes to be able to speak out, whether he is tired, sleepy, or hungry.

This person has always seemed to live in a nearly airtight body. In the beginning, no one asked him, but then his function gradually deteriorated.

Lin Anran’s face was pinched slightly with one hand, making him let go of his mouth.

After that, the person was directly held up by the armpit with both hands. Shang Hao hugged him so high that he was flush with him, stretched out his face personally, and coaxed him and said, “Come and kiss.”

Lin Anran was shy and restrained, and the whole person was very embarrassed. Under his impatient urging, he had to get closer and touched him.

Shang Hao stretched out his left face neatly again: “Here.”

Lin Anran had a meal and kissed him again.

After being kissed twice, Shang Hao arrogantly asked him, “Is it cool?”

Lin Anran, who had a thin face, was pursing her lips and smiling, very embarrassed. Looking again, the tips of the ears on both sides turned red.

Lin An looks white and pure, and a smile makes his heart feel soft. The red lips and white teeth under the light are particularly inviting.

Shang Hao stared at him deeply for a while, put his forehead against him, and leaned against him.

Lin Anran has a big gap in the sense of security. It just so happens that Shang Hao likes him every day.

The bodies of the two people are closely attached to each other, and they fit together for no reason. Why is it just so, like a strangely shaped puzzle, I met another puzzle, and just discovered the complementarity of each other.

Or maybe it was just his dream picture, he imagined him.

Lin Anran found that she was lying flat now and gave up struggling. Faintly, he had already given up calling Shang Hao “he”, and dealt with it directly in his heart as Lin Anran’s.

Shang Hao put his arms around him, and asked over his head, “Of course there is nothing you want to tell me?”

Lin Anran was quiet again.

Of course there is no, but I don’t want to say.

Don’t look at him asking so politely, as if Shang Hao is so humane. In fact, the person who said this was not kind, and Lin Anran, who was asked about it, always felt pressure.

To put it vividly, it’s like the subordinate being questioned by the boss, “Do you have nothing to say to me?”

What he asked was about tonight he suddenly asked him questions with his personal information.

It is the familiar feeling of being asked, and the familiar pressure.

Because Lin Anran couldn’t speak, he was often asked by others in the conversation, and the anxiety that followed had become a process.

“No.” In the end he could only say that. His voice was weak, and he shook his head on Shang Hao.

Shang Hao gently followed Lin Anran’s back, and the two of them leaned together like this, and he didn’t speak any more.

The room was quiet for a while. Just when Lin Anran expected such a comfortable silence to continue, Shang Hao’s sudden request came in her ear: “Of course, come live with me, okay?”

His voice was very low, and there was an indulgent gentleness in it.

Lin Anran’s heart trembled slightly following his voice, and he had to continue turning his head, this time facing Shang Hao with the back of his head.

He deliberately avoided a little outside shoulder during his movements, and was careful not to touch the tattooed area. Shang Hao’s voice laughed at him: “It’s okay if you touch it. It’s been a long time since it’s painful.”

Lin Anran did not speak. From Shang Hao’s perspective, he can see his eyelashes, quiet and well-behaved.

He glanced at Lin Anran, and went on speaking to himself: “This is a tattoo when I was studying abroad a few years ago. At that time, I just thought it was fun, and didn’t think much about it.”

“Don’t you want to know what my tattoo means?” he asked.

When Lin Anran looked at him, Shang Hao was also looking at him. He told Lin Anran the answer, which was a Latin sentence.

“Dixisseteamomihicentumannos.”

“I must have said I love you hundreds of years ago.”

Lin Anran smiled. It was purely because Shang Hao was really terrible when he was gentle, and his ears were numb. Shang Hao saw him laugh and asked him, “You don’t believe it?”

Lin Anran smiled and shook his head.

It’s not that he didn’t want to believe it. They didn’t even know each other a few years ago.

After telling the story of the tattoo, the two went to sleep with the lights out. Lin Anran just lay down, and was hugged again by one hand.

The room sank into the darkness of night, and the air was completely quiet. Lin Anran lay beside Shang Hao, his eyes closed, but his mind was still clear.

Many vague thoughts flashed past, squeezing his mind silently and chaotically.

Lin Anran has said such symptoms in the books he read before. It is probably that the delusional patients themselves firmly believe that their object has a fictitious development and relationship with him, and they fantasize about the development and end of the relationship. This object may not even exist.

If the other “he” wants to believe in himself, in order to gain a sense of security from this relationship, there will be many things he can do.

“Shang Hao” did everything he did, and he said everything he said.

He had to admit that the feeling of being around Shang Hao was really addictive.

* “I must have said that I love you hundreds of years ago” is a lyrics from the song “Lover Missed” by the Five-Man Orchestra, with changes.

Tomorrow there is something at home, you may need to ask for leave, don’t wait~