Love Doesn’t Matter - Chapter 61 – Useless Doll

‘Is it because of my short hair?’ The air touching her neck felt too cold. Emilia felt the change of seasons and stood there. In late summer, the leaves that covered the sky were dark blue and overripe. Emilia, who had been staring at the ridge, suddenly turned around and went inside the house. When she came out again, a thin shawl was draped over her shoulders. Then Mitch, who was returning from the chicken farm, paused for a moment when he noticed his older sister.

“Are you going to look for a job again?”

“Yeah, I’m going to go downtown today,” Emilia answered and pulled the shawl tighter. Even if Hadius said that he would make them debt-free, things didn’t end there. The reality she realized through Aunt Rosie’s gossip was harsh and bitter. They needed more money. No matter how much she thought about it, the only thing she could do right now was to pay off the remaining amount.

At first, she tried to visit His Majesty the King. However, it would have been useless even if she did, as it was difficult to meet. The King would have eventually sided with Meyer. Judging from the fact that he even gave a bounty to Hadius, he may have written to the royal family in advance.

‘What if I use the parliament or the media?’ That, too, wasn’t an easy task. It meant all-out war. She would have to deal with not only Hadius but the Meyer household and even the entire aristocratic world as well. Just like her deceased father did.

‘What happens when you poke a beehive without protection? It’ll be something so great that it can’t even be compared to Hadius playing around with a few pennies.’ Not only her stepmother, but bad things could happen to Mitch and Charlotte as well.

In conclusion, it was hopeless. The world takes it as something natural that a nobleman uses money as a pretense to demand the body of a commoner woman. Even the magistrate may tell her that if she can’t, she should pay it back with her body.

“But Sister, these days, the streets are overflowing with unemployed people. Are you going to find a job in the midst of all of them?”

“I should try.”

“Why all of a sudden? Anyone who sees it would think the family is ruined.”

Emilia pondered for a moment whether she should confide in him about her stepmother’s debts. But her tongue was stiff and didn’t move.

‘Not yet. It isn’t too late to find a job and come up with a plan first, and then be honest about it.’

“I’m an adult too, I can’t live depending on Mother forever. And for Charlotte, we need more money.”

Mitch looked down at the empty feed container in his hand. He nodded reluctantly at it, ‘Damn, even this is all gone.’ Even for a 12-year-old child who cries out for revolution, ‘money’ was a wall that was difficult to overcome.

[tl/n: am I the only one who thought Mitch was older?]

“But is it really okay? Sister shouldn’t work.”

“It will be fine. As you said, His Majesty the King has long forgotten me. Besides, we’re in the middle of negotiating the breakup right now. It’s not going to be a big deal just because I made a little bit of money.”

‘Even if something big happens, wouldn’t it be better than selling your body?’ Emilia smirked to herself.

“Right…”

Mitch nodded, brushing his chin and furrowing his eyebrows.

“But where else do you need a bookkeeper?”

Emilia swallowed a bitter laugh. Her high ambitions as a ‘bookkeeper’ were immediately abandoned when she saw Mr. Haspel being taken away. She thought for a moment to ask Nathan Malvin for help, but she dismissed the idea right away. If she did, Hadius might really kill him. The crazy man who handed her a pistol was strangling her, blocking all directions.

“Ah! Why don’t you go to the factory where Mother works? They need a bookkeeper there, too.”

‘That, madman Young Master Meyer has already taken over.’ Emilia swallowed the irony and smiled bitterly.

“There is no fool who entrusts the books to a woman who has neither education nor experience, except for Mr. Haspel. What if I’m not a bookkeeper? Whether it’s washing dishes or sewing, there are so many things I can do in the world.”

Mitch, who was washing the feed canister, paused.

“I’m against that. My sister working as a maid.”

‘Maid’ was what she wanted the most. She had learned a lot from visiting the noblemen’s mansions for five years.

However, most of the households in Erndorf that needed a maid were well acquainted with Cavendish. Hadius took over Cavendish not too long ago, so working as a maid in a wealthy household was like stepping into his grasp with her own feet. Emilia needed a place to make money while hiding the fact that she was Meyer’s fiancée.

“Where the hell did Mitch Bern go, who claimed that labor was sacred? Your sister really wants to be independent now. I want to save money and go to school.”

Emilia eagerly raised the corners of her mouth. Digging into a tunnel wasn’t suited to her personality. As she was contemplating on how to comfort her younger brother, an idea came to mind.

“Well, shall we go there tomorrow?”

“Mmh? Where?”

“Hilden Farm.”

She thought he would like it, but Mitch flinched strangely.

“Ah, that’s it… Actually, Sister, I’ve already been there alone.”

Emilia’s eyes widened.

“But there was nothing. It was really just a farm. I’ve only smelled manure.”

“… Really?”

“Yeah, I was just wasting my time.”

Seeing the child kicking the ground with his feet made her feel relieved, yet a dejected laugh came out.

“Anyway, that’s a relief. I’ve been thinking about it too.” Emilia took a step without noticing that her brother was smiling stiffly. “But promise me one thing. From now on, you won’t go alone like that. What if they were really dangerous people?”

“Huh? Oh… Yeah, you’re right. I won’t do that in the future. I’m going to stop doing nonsense and help with housework. Mom looks tired these days.”

Reminded again, Emilia’s heart was heavy. She went to Ramsco and confirmed that her stepmother had paid off all the debts. There was no doubt that Hadius had also paid off the rest of the debt. However, perhaps because of the extreme stress of the past, her stepmother’s complexion still looked very bad.

‘You should relieve your heavy burden as soon as possible. So finding a job comes first.’

* * * 

‘Dram General Store.’ Emilia clenched her fists under the sign. After walking around all day, she finally was there. The purposeful determination she had shown in front of her younger brother in the morning had completely disappeared. After being treated as a useless child from yesterday to today, the courage to knock on the door gradually disappeared.

‘You knew it wouldn’t be easy. Do not give up. You can’t just step back like this.’

She held her heart and pushed the heavy door with all her might. A gentle-looking clerk greeted her kindly.

“Hello, perhaps, am I able to get a job here?”

Emilia repeated what she had said dozens of times over the past few days and waited for the other person’s reaction. Even if she was ridiculed or kicked out right away, she thought she wouldn’t be disappointed. But surprisingly, the clerk went inside the curtain behind him after telling her to wait for a while. Emilia’s heart began to beat with anticipation. After a moment, a man who seemed to be the owner appeared and looked up and down at her. With a small, bulky physique and a pipe in his mouth, he introduced himself as Samuel Dram.

“Are you looking for a job?”

In front of his curious gaze, an unknown hope sprung up. Emilia swallowed dry and began to explain eagerly what she could do.

Sales promotions, displaying, cleaning… while listing all the things she could do, Emilia discreetly added she could read books, too. The man didn’t cut her speech nor give her a sour look like everyone else. Emilia’s voice grew more and more confident.

“It may seem strange to you to suddenly appear and say this, but please let me work for just a few days. Try to hire me for three days without pay, and fire me if you think I’m of no use. Mr. Dram has nothing to lose.”

The man, who was thinking about something with his mouth closed, suddenly licked his lips.

“At a time when the number of unemployed people is overflowing due to terrible machines, do you know that there aren’t just one or two kids like you who came asking for work?”

Fortunately, the words that made her eyes widen continued immediately.

“Do you really need a place to work?”

“Yes? …Ah yes!”

“How about doing this? There’s another place I run, and I think there must be something for you to do there…”

Emilia’s face swelled with hope.

“If you let me, I will do my best.”

“Follow me.”

He led Emilia out of the store. While walking behind him, Emilia felt her heart race out of control.

‘As expected, it was good not to give up. You ended up doing it.’

‘By the way, when he asks my name, How should I answer this? I’d rather use a pseudonym. There’s nothing wrong with being careful. What would be good? Elaine? Sedna?’

She walked frantically with excitement, yet she felt something strange. The ‘Dram General Store’ was not in the downtown area, but it was still in a place where many people visited. However, the steps of the man walking ahead keep heading towards the back alley. Slowly, she started to get anxious.

“Excuse me…”

The moment Emilia was about to stop walking, the general store owner also stopped.

“It’s here.”

The tip of the saliva-stained pipe pointed to a shabby building. It was a place where the odors of alcohol and garbage mixed. Emilia just realized it.

It was a tavern. The atmosphere was quite different from the tavern in Türn Street she went to with Hadius….

“Don’t worry. It’s not a brothel. I never do such dirty business.”

The general store owner continued as if reassuring her.

“Well, drunkards can touch your ass sometimes, but they’ll give you a bunch of tips instead. Again, our store waitresses never sell their bodies. Because I refuse stinky girls with syphilis. There may be customers who are drunk and will try to undress you but don’t worry about that. I will take care of blocking them when the moment is suitable.”

Dram sucked the pipe deeply and looked into Emilia’ face once more. The tip of the saliva-stained pipe tapped her short hair. Emilia’s face turned pale.

“I don’t know how it happened, but I’ll lend you a wig. You might even be able to fix your fate with tips. I also have a conscience. Of course, I’ll pay you.”

Perhaps it was because she was inflated with anticipation until the very last moment. Emilia felt nauseous, and she felt as if she had fallen into the mud.

“No, I never intend to do such a thing. Please let me wash the dishes or clean.”

The man’s two eyes wandered around the white, beautiful face and slender body. Perhaps it would have been better to see greedy eyes. Dram’s gaze seemed to be looking at the useless doll of the world. It was the same expression that the shopkeepers showed when she knocked on the previous doors.

Unlike other commoner children, like Haley, who had been on the frontline of this life for a long time, Emilia was close to a noble young lady. The result of participating in the noble world for the past five years was to return like a boomerang in this way.

“Why would I kick out the kitchen staff whom I have been working with for decades, to employ a kid like you?”

An annoyed, crooked smirk crossed the man’s face.

“Well, you’re not suddenly going to ask to raise the ransom, are you? Mmh?”

“…Excuse me. Mr. Dram, I’ll just go.”

“Ha!”

Samuel Dram suddenly moved and blocked Emilia’s path.