Mage Tank - Chapter 157: An Offer You Can't Refuse

“Monkey bread!” said Etja.

The woman called Avarice raised an immaculate eyebrow at the outburst and looked over at our resident mage. My focus was fully fixed on our host, but I understood the seemingly nonsensical phrase. Multiple party members were mentally compromised, myself included.

Being made aware of a mental debuff wouldn’t end the effect, but it allowed us to execute some safety measures. Etja’s code phrase indicated that she wanted us to take a silent evaluation to keep the source of the affliction unaware, and hopefully surprise them. I took a mental inventory of where we stood and allowed the process to play out.

I tested to see if I could stop taking any action. I stood calmly and evaluated my surroundings, being certain not to draw weapons or use any skills. Knowing that I was under a potentially hostile compulsion but being unable to do so much as activate my shield was uncomfortable, but I managed to stay still. If I was Dominated, then the only command I’d received was to take no action. If I’d been Dominated and piloted to perform some other type of task, I wouldn’t have even been able to undergo this thought process. That didn’t rule Dominate out completely, but it made it a lot less likely.

The fact that I could organize my thoughts also meant I wasn’t experiencing Psychosis. Always a good thing to recognize.

Standing still meant that I wasn’t under the effect of Fear, since that would force me to move away from the source of the Fear effect. Fear was also one of the more obvious effects, easily understood in the moment as blinding terror but coming with an irresistible urge to flee. I was calm and, in fact, pretty comfortable with my surroundings. There wasn’t much to be afraid of, other than the general threat that comes with being inside of a Delve and under some mind-warping debuff. Still, nothing was obviously dangerous nearby. I could rule out Fear.

The lack of danger led me to evaluate whether we were fighting anything. We didn’t appear to be in combat, my weapons were stowed, Avarice wasn’t armed or under attack, and there was no one that I’d even consider attacking. Everyone present was either a party member or some other kind of ally. So, that took Berserk off the table.

I could also rule out Paranoia since my Sage Advice evolution literally made me immune to it. I could recognize my allies, and I wasn’t feeling particularly suspicious. This was about as safe as things got inside of a Delve. I might have even gone so far as to say that I was the opposite of paranoid.

The next easiest check was to see if I was Distracted. Being Distracted meant that I could only pay attention to the source of my Distraction, so all I had to do was confirm that I could focus on anything other than what I was currently fixated on, which was Avarice. Then again, Avarice was just about the most beautiful creature I’d ever seen, and I was hesitant to give up soaking in her radiance. How often did someone encounter the platonic ideal of magnificence? Distracted wasn’t a big deal compared to the other debuffs, and it only really mattered if we were in combat, which I’d already established we weren’t. I put that one aside for the moment.

Mesmerized was up next, which would make me treat the source of the mesmerization as an ally and would prevent me from attacking them. This one gave me pause because there wasn’t anyone in the room who wasn’t an ally. Curious. It seemed absurd to consider that one of my party members was some kind of hostile invader. Which one would it be if that were true? Etja had called out the code phrase, but I couldn’t decide if that made her more suspicious or less. I’d spent years with everyone present–aside from Avarice and her Aspirants–so the idea that one of them might have betrayed me felt absurd. As for Avarice, she was practically a saint. I’m a cynical guy sometimes, but even I wouldn’t stoop so low as to believe she was some kind of…

I double-checked my logic. Avarice was the most recent addition to our cadre of helpful helpers, and she wasn’t a direct party member. Given that we had the shortest history, it would make sense that she was the source of the mesmerization. Still, that seemed ridiculous.

Why did it seem ridiculous?

Because she’d been nothing but supportive!

How had she supported us?

Her Aspirants had given us enough emerald chips to buy a small country!

Didn’t we have to kill them to get those?

Sure, but it was a noble sacrifice on their part. They laid down their lives to empower us and…

“Is the monkey bread… pineapple flavored?” I asked.

“Yes,” Etja carefully replied. “It’s my favorite, but this one’s a blend.”

“Oh, I see what’s happening,” said Avarice. She bit her bottom lip and looked embarrassed. It was incredibly endearing, and I hated seeing her feel insecure about anything. “Please excuse the oversight. I haven’t been around mortals for a very long time. I forgot to tone things down for you.”

Avarice’s soul pulled back so that it no longer filled the chamber, smothering itself down until it was a bright shimmer an inch off of her skin. If anything, it made her even more radiant. She looked around at us, frowned in such an adorable way, and then her soul slipped away back inside her until I could no longer see it at all.

You are no longer Distracted!

You are no longer Mesmerized!

“Fuck,” I said. “One for two. Damn, I was close.”

“Arlo,” Xim whispered loudly, tone grave.

I turned to the cleric, finally tearing my eyes from Avarice. It was a strange sensation, like turning away from a masterpiece without comparison to realize that it was a hollow imitation of the true thing. Xim was beautiful. Avarice was something else… some other thing attempting to emulate beauty. I blinked a few times, clearing away what felt like years of conditioning. My blood ran cold.

I’d just gotten soul fucked by an avatar.

“The card, Arlo!” Xim whisper-shouted. Her rose skin had gone pale, her eyes wide.

I nodded, then did my best to bring up my inventory screen without staring at it or giving myself away. I quickly found the Get Out of Cage Free card and selected it.

Would you like to use the Get Out of Cage Free card? Y/N

I didn’t even have to remove the card from inventory, which was a nice thing to know. I mentally selected–

One of the thousand arms of Avarice’s shadow snaked out across the floor. It crawled up my torso and then retracted faster than I could react. Avarice held up her hand and furrowed her brow as she studied something that hadn’t been there before.

The prompt disappeared, and I glanced at the inventory screen, finding the Get Out of Cage Free card missing.

“This is interesting,” said Avarice.

She held the card above her and looked up at it like it was a hundred-dollar bill she was trying to authenticate. She flipped it over and studied the back, then lowered it to her face. Her tongue zipped out and she gave it a little lick. A gentle smile sprouted across her face and she looked into the distance, then smacked her lips a few times.

“That’s wonderful,” the avatar said.

“Arlo,” Xim hissed from right beside me. I flinched when I looked down to find her six feet closer than she had been. A bead of sweat ran down her temple. “Tell me that’s not the card, Arlo.”

“I try not to lie to my friends,” I whispered. I wasn’t sure why we were whispering, but it felt appropriate. A look of dread nested on the cleric’s face, settling down to lay eggs of horror.

Unauthorized duplication: this narrative has been taken without consent. Report sightings.

“There’s no need for panic,” said Avarice, holding up her hands in a placating gesture, the card tucked between two fingers. “I only wish for a peaceful exchange.”

I glanced around at the small horde of Doomed Aspirants. The 14 flanking the room continued to stare at nothing. The one beside the couch kept giving us the stink eye but hadn’t moved. Not that they were the true threat, but the display was meaningful nonetheless.

“No offense,” I said, “but you’re surrounded by soldiers and just stole a rather valuable item from me. You also engaged in some light brainwashing as an opener. That doesn’t feel very peaceful.”

Avarice let out a quick breath and her shoulders slumped.

“My presence affects people in particular ways,” she said. She pressed a hand to her cheek and put on a sheepish expression. “Turning it off is like clenching a muscle. I haven’t had to do it in… honestly, I don’t know how long. I used to suppress it automatically when I regularly interacted with mortals, but I’ve spent a lot of time on vacation recently. I’ve gotten out of the habit.” She clasped her hands in front of her chest. “Please forgive the oversight. As for my creations…” She looked back at the Aspirants. “Would you like me to dismiss them? I’m happy to if that will make you more comfortable.”

“Would it matter?” asked Varrin.

“It depends on what you mean,” said Avarice, studying the big guy. “If you’re asking whether their absence would increase your chances of success should you choose to fight me, then to be blunt, the answer is no.”

I heard the tinkle of glass hitting the ground and turned to see a broken potion flask. If Nuralie was following protocol, she’d just taken an anxiolytic, which would give her 50 percent resistance to mind-altering effects for 10 minutes. The bonus came from one of her passives, so the drug wouldn’t have been helpful to anyone else for the same use.

“I would prefer that they leave,” said Nuralie. Pause. “It would make me more comfortable.”

“Of course,” said Avarice.

Though she made no visible motion or command, the center Aspirant turned and began marching to the back of the room. The rest of the Aspirants followed until all of them had disappeared through two tunnels dug into the wall.

“And the card?” I asked.

Avarice gave the card a final glance, then walked forward and held it out to me. I craned my neck to peer up at the 10-foot-tall woman and hesitated, expecting some sort of trick. I reached out and took the card without issue, then checked it to make sure the card was real. As far as I could tell, it was genuine. All the System text was the same, and the popup to confirm its use still appeared when prompted.

“I have no plans to keep you here against your will,” said Avarice, taking a couple of steps back and folding her hands behind her. “I’d hate for you to waste something so valuable, but feel free to leave any time, assuming that card works here.” I raised an eyebrow at that. “I doubt the System would want to whisk you away when you’ve already beaten the Delve.”

I fought back the urge to activate the card immediately, regardless of her words. Whatever kind of avatar Avarice was, she was the kind of threat we had no answer for. Then again, she’d had plenty of opportunity to kill us while we were all enthralled. Some of us could still be enthralled, but this was a situation where most of our countermeasures were probably irrelevant.

“Etja, how do we feel?”

“I don’t know,” she said. “Everyone acted like I was crazy when I tried to get us to talk about our theory that an avatar was in the Delve before we left the last challenge. Then I was the only one freaking out when she appeared, and you were all smiling like meeting your best friend. I think everyone’s fine, but I can’t be sure. Also, you’ve got to assume that I’m compromised.”

Etja was immune to being mesmerized, but other mental debuffs could still affect her.

“Sticky situation,” I said. Avarice silently watched the exchange. “Xim, how’s Cleanse doing?”

“I already rotated it through everyone,” the cleric replied.

“I don’t remember being Cleansed.”

“Yeah. I don’t think it did anything. Either that or…”

Or she was compromised as well. I hated mind fuckery.

“Let’s take a quick vote,” I said, keeping my eye on Avarice, but quickly making sure that I could still look away from her if needed. “Stay or leave?”

“What do you want to do?” asked Xim.

I ran the card across my fingers, flicking it back and forth, then stowed it in my inventory.

“Dominate is the main concern,” I said. “But this would be a pretty strange use of it. It would also be multi-target, which should be impossible from a single source. Then again, avatar. Regardless, I will admit that I’m curious.”

“Grotto,” said Xim, “Commandment?”

Commandment would insert a “profound truth” into our minds. The skill could lead to unpredictable side effects, but with careful wording, it could theoretically override Dominate.

[The chance of success against Arlo or Etja would only be 6 percent. However, I cannot detect any aberrant neurochemical processes in Arlo’s brain.]

“Shit,” Xim swore. “The safest bet would be to leave, but I vote to hear her out.”

The unspoken truth in Xim’s statement is that we rarely favored the safest bet.

“We would already be dead if she wanted it,” Varrin added. Was that suspicious? It sounded like something Varrin would normally say.

“We cannot know that for sure,” said Nuralie. With her potion, it was a coin flip as to whether her counsel should be favored over everyone else’s. Of course, Avarice could have unknown abilities that made Nuralie’s potion less effective. “Even if that is true, there may be other tricks she is playing that require us to stay for longer.”

“Like turning us into bugs,” said Etja, voice shaky.

Avarice frowned at Etja but didn’t interrupt.

“Grotto? Shog?” I asked. “Opinions?”

Shog floated beside me, landing and placing his feet on the floor.

“There is no shame in falling back from a superior force,” he said. “But this majestic being intrigues me.”

I glanced up at my summon. I realized I was second-guessing everyone, but that really sounded suspect.

[It is not my place to advise you on this matter,] Grotto thought to us. [But I will say that this does not appear like an avatar breaching its confinement.]

“You should not equivocate so much,” said Shog, narrowing his dark eyes at Grotto. “It is unbecoming for a c’thon to lack conviction.”

I took note of Shog’s decision not to point out that Grotto was “an imposter” like he usually did. Either my summon realized that would be giving Avarice information she might not already have, or he was being puppeted by a force that didn’t have access to his memories.

I absolutely despised this. Against something our own level, we had a lot of tools to overcome mental assaults. Even something twice our level would have a tough time. But Avarice was likely a force beyond even the highest echelons of Delver power. All we could do was play it safe or take a gamble.

“Alright. I guess we can hear the elevator pitch,” I said, gesturing to Avarice. I kept my inventory screen open with my mental finger on the card’s eject button. “What sort of ‘exchange’ are you talking about?”

Avarice gave me a shallow nod before speaking. The hands in her shadow bobbed alongside the gesture.

“First, I propose an exchange of information. After that, I propose an exchange of services.”

“What sort of information?” I asked.

“I’d like to hear your stories,” she said. “A complete biography from each of you and an account of your exploits. Especially as they relate to the Delves, any avatars you’ve encountered, and any gods with whom you have communed.”

“You want to get to know us?” I asked.

She held up a finger and clicked her tongue once.

“No,” she said. “I want the information. I will not pretend that I seek to engender some sort of… ‘bond’ between us. Normally, I would be inclined to ingratiate myself by feigning interest in your habits and hobbies, but I believe your group is experienced enough to see through that.”

“Very forthright,” I said. “Why do you want our histories, then?”

“It is valuable,” she said.

“Uh, why is it valuable?”

She pushed her mouth to one side and studied me.

“A strange question,” she said. “I have been divorced from humanoid culture for some time, but do techniques, skills, revelations, Delve accounts, avatar profiles, and understanding the whims of the gods no longer hold worth?”

As she spoke, I realized that most Delvers would probably pay a small fortune to understand what made us tick and how we leveled so quickly, among other secrets we held close. There were also entities that might want that information, either to use it to gain our favor or to wield it as a weapon against us.

“I suppose when you put it that way…” I said. “But for an avatar?”

“I may find some of it useful,” she said with a smile. “What has no utility to me can always be traded.”

“That makes me uncomfortable,” said Nuralie.

Avarice shrugged.

“Precious things can be difficult to barter with,” she said. “But I believe I can make a compelling offer.”

“Which is?” I asked.

She waved a hand at the illusion above us, Arzia drifting slowly beneath soft clouds. I noticed that there was a large storm over a portion of Timagrin.

“I can offer you the man who will destroy the world.”